Coming in so late in the game and being considered for the group SM was about to debut had been a huge opportunity, but it came with a lot of pressure. He’d wanted to do everything right, but there had been a lot to adjust to - - a new culture, a new way of doing things, new people, new expectations.
Suho was older and had been at the company since forever. Management liked him; the other trainees deferred to him. Baekhyun had quickly tried to follow his example.
One of the first things Baekhyun realized was that Suho didn’t have sex with other trainees. Either he was getting it somewhere on the side, or he wasn’t getting it at all, but he wasn’t involved in the horny groping and playful fondling and friendly making out that some of the other trainees were into. Actually, the more Baekhyun paid attention to who got off together and who didn’t, he began to realize that the trainees being shuffled into the debut project were in the “didn’t” category.
Was that a coincidence or not? There were some really good-looking trainees, and the entire situation was sort of emotionally intense what with everyone’s hopes and dreams being on the line, not to mention the survivor’s guilt of making it while other trainees were being cut. It seemed like a prime situation for bonding and relieving some stress by getting off with each other.
One night, after a brutal practice, his entire body aching and his ego seriously bruised, Baekhyun stretched out on the floor in a pool of his own sweat. When Chen sat beside him and rubbed his back, he felt marginally better. Chen was his closest friend here and sort of his biggest competition, and he’d been horny for days, and he really needed to feel good, to get something right in the middle of this stress and pressure and emotional confusion. So as soon as they were alone, he rolled onto his back and asked, “You want to make out?” What he really meant was, “You want to get off together?” but he wasn’t that used to picking guys up and he’d never actually asked someone, “Do you want to have sex with me now?”
Chen grinned - - and maybe blushed a little, but they were both so red and sweaty that Baekhyun couldn’t tell - - and asked, “Should we?” His eyebrows drew together slightly in an uncertain smile-frown that Baekhyun would’ve found really cute if it hadn’t seemed like he might be about to say no. “Chanyeol said that’s not a good idea.”
What? “Chanyeol?” Were Chen and Chanyeol together or something? Perplexed, Baekhyun sat up.
Casting a glance toward the door, Chen scooted closer, lowering his voice. “He said that we should wait. It’s better not to do anything now. It’s good to show that we’re self-disciplined.” Another glance at the door, and then he looked into Baekhyun’s eyes with a “this is significant” tilt of his eyebrows. “He said that the payoff is worth it.”
Payoff? “What payoff? What are you talking about?”
Chen laughed. “I don’t know,” he admitted, smiling. “Kai interrupted and he never finished telling me. But he said that it’s not a good idea to, you know. Not until we debut.”
It was a frustrating amount of information - - enough for him to know that something was going on, but not enough to tell him what. As soon as he could, Baekhyun pulled Chanyeol aside before practice, while Kai and Suho were stretching to warm up, and asked, “What did you tell Chen about not making out? What’s the payoff?”
Chanyeol gave him an incredulous look, then yanked on his shoulder and leaned in to whisper in his ear. “Don’t talk about it! It’s not good to talk about it, we’re not supposed to know.”
“Great, that’s great,” Baekhyun said, “because I don’t know anything. What shouldn’t we know?”
With another “are you kidding me?!” look, Chanyeol pulled on his shoulder again. “No sex before debut. All of the sex after debut. That’s the rule, that’s how it goes.”
All of the sex? What did that mean? Was SM going to buy them sex workers? “What are you talking about?” Baekhyun demanded. “What does that mean?”
Chanyeol dragged him into the hallway and two doors down, into a closet. In the dark, in a whisper, with the smell of bleach in the air, Chanyeol said, “When you debut, you get to have sex with the other members in your group. All of the time. The company wants you to wear yourselves out fucking each other so you won’t get in trouble or get caught with anyone else. And the company sunbaes get their pick of the hoobaes. The male idols do it with the male idols, and the female idols do it with the other female idols. DBSK fucked Super Junior, Super Junior fucked Shinee, and Shinee’s going to fuck us. But they won’t bother you until you’ve debuted because too many trainees come and go, and they aren’t going to risk their reputations for some guy who gets kicked out a week later. Besides, the debut contract has a thousand sub-clauses covering things you can’t talk about, so you’re legally not allowed to tell the secret even if you want to. Okay?”
Reeling, maybe from the smell of bleach but more likely from this revelation, Baekhyun leaned against the door. “Really?” Suddenly embarrassed, suspicious, he asked, “Is this a joke? A prank?”
“Hey, if I could, I’d have my cock up your ass right this second,” Chanyeol said. “I can’t stand it like this, I want to fuck those dongsaengs so badly. But if you can’t control yourself, the company doesn’t want you. They want idols who can make sacrifices for their career.”
It sounded ridiculous - - why did the company’s management care who he had sex with? Then again, the company cared about everything he did. What he ate, where he went, what he wore.
Sex with SM idols? Sex with Shinee?
Sex with the other members? That was eleven other guys. It would be okay if he had sex with them?
Suddenly, Baekhyun had a whole new reason to be impatient to debut.
Also, everything Chanyeol had told him was true and better than his dirtiest fantasies, and his ass was raw from being pounded by so much cock.
He and the other members were all over each other. They were nervous and excited and they couldn’t sleep, so as soon as their manager left them alone at night they crawled all over each other, dragging each other out of bed and humping like animals. Baekhyun had never had so much cock in his life. It was like his world was split in two: there was the professional idol side of his life, where he had to smile and be polite and perform on command, and everything else was a nonstop orgy.
It lasted that way for a while. They got to know each other sexually. At first, it was all a blur of taut skin and hard cocks. Then there were superficial details: Kris’ cock was enormous, Tao gave fantastic head. Then things started to settle down and Baekhyun noticed that Lay liked to watch, and Chanyeol had a thing for ears, and Luhan liked to talk dirty during sex. Some of the members liked to top more (Luhan) or bottom more (D.O.); some were pretty flexible about it (Xiumin, Tao) and some weren’t (Kris, Chen). Everyone had individual preferences - - Tao was really into cum - - and personal talents - - Kai could get hard over and over again and keep the party going.
The nonstop orgy turned out not to be nonstop after all. Sometimes Baekhyun wanted to spend all night being pounded by Kris’ enormous cock, and sometimes he just wanted to go to sleep. Instead of everyone asking each person separately and individually for sex or having to say no a dozen times, a lot of times they’d split up, and whoever wanted to go to sleep would go to sleep, and whoever was interested in sex would figure out who wanted what.
They were broken up into K and M a lot of the time. More than they liked. It was easier in a lot of ways, but quieter and lonelier, too. And the sexual balance was really different when it was just EXO-K members together. Chanyeol and Kai and Sehun were all looking for someone to screw, and Baekhyun was their number one target. There was no gigantic Kris cock, no Lay standing to one side staring and jacking off, no Luhan making him admit how much he liked it, no Xiumin teasing and flirting and making him happy to beg for it, no Tao licking Kris’ cum off of his thighs, no Chen kissing him and curling up with him and sucking his fingers. Just his best friend and two horny maknaes taking turns in his mouth while they waited for each other to finish with his ass.
Without the M members, Baekhyun had time to get to know the K members. Really get to know them.
Kai? Kai was great. He had a high sex drive and he was always ready for it. Sudden, intense, up-against-the-wall sex when they only had minutes to spare? Amazing. Slow, deep screws for hours in a hotel bed? Amazing. The way he kissed made Baekhyun feel sexy, he was an incredible top, and he gave great head.
Chanyeol was easy-going. Not intense, not lazy, just ready for a good time. He was considerate - - he liked to find out what the members liked, and do it for them. He also had his own little kink about being scratched and bitten and begged. Baekhyun didn’t really want to bite his ears and call him “oppa,” but it was funny how fast it got him off.
Sehun was very good at sex. He wasn’t very committed to it; he got the members off a little too effortlessly, like sexual skill came too easily to him and he took it for granted. But he always seemed to enjoy it, and when Baekhyun crawled into his bed he always gave Baekhyun a good, hard screw, even when he was tired. He talked about roleplaying sometimes, but Baekhyun wasn’t really into that.
D.O. was a little less available than the other members. At first, in the earliest days when they’d all been exploding all over each other, D.O. had always been ready to make out and let Baekhyun give him head. Once things settled, though, D.O.’s interest seemed to dwindle. He made out once in a while, and went down on Kai once in a while, but other than that he didn’t seem very interested. He said “no” more often than he said “yes.” Like Lay, he spent a lot of time standing around watching the other members have sex, although he didn’t masturbate when he watched, he just stared in silence. At first, Baekhyun found it a little unnerving, but quickly it became just one more sexual quirk that Baekhyun got used to. There were so many members having so much sex that it was okay if D.O. wanted to skip it most nights. Besides, when D.O. did want to make out, it was great how into it he got, how turned on he was by every little thing.
Suho? Well… The EXO-M members were a little weird, sexually. Lay was super, super into porn; Luhan was weirdly intense; Kris was lazy and he usually put Baekhyun on top so he wouldn’t have to thrust. And the EXO-K members had their little quirks. But none of that struck Baekhyun as strange as Suho, the horny-chaste perpetual virgin.
As it turned out, Chanyeol had left out a little detail in his explanation of the payoff. He’d skipped the historical retrospective of company sunbaes. If he’d provided more information, he might have mentioned that “members” referred to most of the members, and that there were different rules for the leaders.
Baekhyun didn’t know how it had gone with sunbaes before 2005, but apparently Leeteuk had decided that Super Junior had too many members. Orgies with that many guys apparently got a little wild, and Leeteuk wasn’t sexually dominant enough to keep things under his own control. He’d worried that if his members ran roughshod over him sexually, they’d take him lightly as a leader, and he had too many members to keep the group together if he lost their respect. So he’d removed himself from the scene. He’d kept to himself and let them have their fun without him. Apparently things had stayed that way for a while, and then Kangin and Heechul had decided that seeing Leeteuk unhappy and frustrated and isolated from the rest of the team wasn’t good for anyone, so they’d started providing him with sexual favors. Seducing him. Coaxing him into making out with them, convincing him to let them suck his cock, and so on. Donghae joined in, and then Yesung, and then the whole group was taking turns seducing him privately, one-on-one.
When Shinee debuted, Onew told his members to carry on without him, sexually. His sex drive wasn’t very high and he was focused on work; he thought that sex would be a distraction, and he thought that he’d accidentally give everything away. But he put himself under so much pressure that the whole team suffered, and things weren’t resolved until he gave up on staying separate and started having sex with the other members.
Apparently Suho had heard those stories and decided that the problem was that Leeteuk and Onew just hadn’t been committed enough. He decided that it was his responsibility, his duty as EXO’s leader, to make a noble sacrifice and set sex aside for the good of the team. He didn’t care what the other members did - - he was completely unruffled at the sight of an eleven-person orgy unfolding right in front of him - - but when it came to his own sex life, he shut down completely at the slightest flirtation. No sex. Never, ever. He wouldn’t even make out with them. Which was really unfair, because when Chen wasn’t around, Suho’s bed was the first one Baekhyun went to for middle-of-the-night cuddles, and Baekhyun was sure that anyone who cuddled so well would also be good at other things, too.
But Suho was so unbending that Baekhyun started to see him as completely asexual. The idea of Suho having sex started to seem funny, actually. He was so polite, so proper, he couldn’t possibly know what to do in bed.
The sunbaes left Suho out of it; apparently sunbae-hoobae sex was another place where SM made the distinction between “members” and “leaders,” and historically the leader was exempt, out of respect for his position. Since the Shinee members never asked Suho for sex, they never heard him give his polite-yet-firm “no,” and they assumed that he was having sex with the rest of EXO. Until one night, while Kai and Taemin were screwing each other noisily on the floor and Jonghyun was toying with Baekhyun’s nipples on the couch, and Jonghyun asked what Suho was like in bed.
It took a while for Jonghyun to realize that Baekhyun wasn’t answering not out of modesty or to protect Suho’s reputation, but because he honestly didn’t know, because no one in EXO had ever actually had sex with Suho.
A week or so later, while Onew took Suho out for coffee, Minho came by EXO’s dorm and had a talk with the hyungs. After Minho left, Kris called everybody together, and they decided that maybe it was time to ask Suho for sex again.
That night, Kris went into Suho’s room and locked the door, and Baekhyun had to sleep with D.O.
The next night, Kai went into Suho’s room and locked the door, and Baekhyun slept with Chanyeol.
The next night, Lay went into Suho’s room and locked the door, and Baekhyun sat on the couch with Chen for hours, trying to guess what it would be like when their turns came.
It took a while to get to Baekhyun’s turn. Kris said that Suho was still kind of unsure and nervous about having sex with the members, so he kept sending in people he thought that Suho would be comfortable with. Apparently Baekhyun wasn’t high on that list. “You have a smart mouth,” Kris said. “You’ll just say something stupid and upset him.” Eventually, though, it was Baekhyun’s turn.
Suho turned to be kind of amazing and kind of awful, sexually. He was super awkward about it, shy and skittish like a startled deer. It took a lot of work to get him off; Kai said that it was because he had a slow trigger, but Baekhyun just thought that it was because he was so tense about sex. When he came, he came sort of spectacularly, squirting like a fountain in long, heavy spurts, at least one of which usually landed right on his face. He was an amazing, amazing kisser. He went down on Baekhyun once in a while, and he let Baekhyun go down on him sometimes. Coming on to him was like seducing a virgin every time - - being patient with him, kissing him until he finally relaxed, coaxing him out of his clothes, spending an eternity finding the right combination of moves to get him off. But once he was comfortable, his responsiveness was a serious turn-on. And he never had his own agenda, never asked for anything specific, just went along with whatever Baekhyun suggested. If Baekhyun wanted to give head or get it, wanted to go fast or slow, wanted to be kind of raunchy or just cuddle, Suho accommodated him and gave him just what he was looking for. Granted, sometimes Suho reverted to that polite-yet-firm “no,” but when Suho said “yes,” Baekhyun was guaranteed a good night.
Then again, Baekhyun never had a bad night, sexually. Oh, sometimes there wasn’t any sex at all. Sometimes he just went right to bed. Sometimes he just made out. Sometimes he intended to get laid but passed out before he really got anything accomplished. Sometimes he wanted to have sex but got caught up playing a videogame and never got around to it.
Sometimes he spent all night having sex in Chanyeol’s bed, or on the couch with D.O., or on the floor with Luhan and Xiumin and Kai, or sandwiched between Kris and Tao. Sometimes he spent all night in a big, evolving orgy. Sometimes he gave in and acted out some of Lay’s porn fantasies. However things went, it was always good, always satisfying and fun.
Asking, “Do you want to have sex with me?” wasn’t embarrassing or daunting anymore. He’d said a thousand assertive, obscene things to the members, and they’d said just as many back to him. There wasn’t an inch of his body he was shy about showing them. He felt at home with them, felt like he could be himself with them. He knew all of the noisy ways Chanyeol moaned and he knew all of the lewd things Lay was into and he knew all of the sensitive spots on Kris’ body and he knew a dozen ways to turn Tao on. When he was in the mood for sizzling intense sweat-all-over sex, or in the mood for a lot of cock down his throat, or in the mood for teasing and laughing and playing around, or in the mood to sit back and get his cock sucked and take a nap, all he had to do was nudge one of the members and ask, and if that one wasn’t in the mood, someone else would be. It was great and it was fun and it was kind of like living in one of Lay’s porn movies, but most of all it was comfortable. He knew the members, and they knew him, inside and out. Kind of literally. They knew each other’s turn-ons and turn-offs, knew each other’s boundaries, knew how to read each other’s moods and bodies. He’d never imagined that he could be so close to anyone, and now he was this close with eleven other people.
Chanyeol was right, that the company wanted them to screw each other so they wouldn’t get caught with anyone else. But maybe, too, the company had figured out that a team of professionals might work well together, and a team of friends might have some good times together, but a team of intertwined, overlapping relationships of boyfriends and lovers could be a rock-solid foundation of intimacy and understanding.
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March 16, 2014
by Matthew Haldeman-Time