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When Suho went back into his bedroom, he collapsed onto his bed. Rolling over, he checked his phone.
He had a text message from Changjo. Call me. Call me now. Call me before you do anything else.
This couldn’t be good. Feeling queasy, he hesitated. Whatever had gone wrong, he didn’t want to know about it. He’d had a really great week, and his members were happy, and he had a date with Sunggyu tomorrow, and everything was going well. He wanted to pretend that it was all still going well, and nothing was wrong. He wanted to shove his phone under his pillow and live in blissful ignorance for a little while longer.
He was so tempted, he did put his phone under his pillow for a second. But he was the leader. He had to be responsible. If something actually was wrong, then he had to face it and fix it.
Grimly pressing his lips together, he called Changjo.
“Suho hyung,” Changjo said immediately. “Where are you, at your dorm?”
“Yes. Maknae, what’s going on?” He sounded whiny and annoyed, even to his own ears. “You can’t text me like that, it’s too alarming, you’re going to cause a panic.”
“You know the group Westonic? They have that rapper with the blue bangs and the tattoos. The one who’s always hitting on Baekhyun hyung.”
“He was caught in a three-way. With a woman, a paid escort. And their visual. She’s telling everybody. She has photos.”
Suho froze. The words “caught” and “photos” and “telling everybody” echoed in his brain, bouncing around the inside of his skull. He was afraid that if he so much as breathed, the ceiling would come crashing down on his head, and the whole world with it.
“I’m not close with him, none of my members have ever even talked to him on the phone. No one in Infinite has ever hung out with him or even seen him outside of dressing rooms before. None of us, we’re not close with their team.”
He tried to understand what Changjo was telling him. He tried to make his panicked brain comprehend something, anything. Teen Top wasn’t involved with Westonic. Infinite wasn’t involved, either. “Not even, what about Woohyun? Or Sungyeol?”
“No, nothing. The visual used to talk to me and text me, but that was over a year ago, and it was all on his side. I know a lot of things about him and his members, but he doesn’t know anything about me.”
Suho had to believe that. He could believe it because Changjo could be very smart, very canny. And he had to believe it because if he let himself doubt, if he let himself worry, he’d lose his grip on sanity. “I-” A sudden sound threw him off, silencing him. Then he realized that it was only his phone.
Management was calling.
“I have to go.” If news was out, if the story was breaking, then he had to figure out what to do. Rumors would fly, everyone would gossip and speculate, old ideas would resurface, new ideas would come out of nowhere. Idols would be under the microscope, their behavior would be scrutinized. The last, the very last thing that Suho wanted, was for anyone to look at him, to poke around his members, to expose their private lives.
“Hyung,” Changjo said urgently. “What about Xiumin hyung?”
Suho’s brain crashed. For a long moment, his thoughts were nothing but static.
His phone was ringing again.
“Hyung, you have to tell me, yes or no,” Changjo insisted. “I can’t help anybody, I can’t protect anybody, if I don’t know what I’m working with.”
He couldn’t say it. He couldn’t admit it. “I have to go.” He couldn’t bear hearing himself sound like a coward. “Yes, yes. Tell C.A.P., warn Andy sunbaenim. Stay away, take care of your members,” he said, and he hung up.
D.O. was running lines with Sehun when Suho suddenly said, “No calls, no texts, no phones, don’t talk to anyone about anything,” and then disappeared behind a closed door with two managers.
Immediately, he shoved his script aside, and everyone congregated in Chanyeol’s room. “What’s going on?” was asked over and over again, but no one had any actual answers.
“He didn’t say that we couldn’t go on-line, right?” Baekhyun asked. So they went on-line.
Which was how they found out that two members of Westonic had just been caught in a sex scandal. A sex scandal with actual evidence. The first couple of articles they found only described the photos but didn’t show any. Chanyeol wanted to go and look them up, but Sehun said, “No, hyung, no, that’s basically looking up porn, isn’t it? Suho hyung would kill us, don’t.”
“It’s not to get off to, it’s news,” Chanyeol said.
“Did they even consent to those photos?” Kai asked. “They didn’t consent to them being posted on-line, did they?”
“Okay, okay, no photos,” Chanyeol said, lifting his hands from his keyboard and mouse.
“I can’t tell what the scandal is, here,” Baekhyun said. “Is it the sex worker thing, or the three-way thing, or-”
“It’s the idol thing,” D.O. said. “It’s two members of the same idol group screwing each other.”
Looking pale, Baekhyun sat down, running a shaky hand through his hair. “I was afraid it was that.”
“That’s how Suho hyung’s going to see it,” Sehun said. “He’s going to flip.”
“Wait, where did Xiumin hyung go?” Lay asked.
“Bathroom,” Chen said.
“He.” Lay frowned, looking worried. “He had sex with Westonic, didn’t he? He said their visual loved his cock and couldn’t ever get enough.”
D.O. exchanged a long, silent look of doom with Kai.
“The… The same visual who just got caught gobbling cock?” Chanyeol asked nervously.
“Oh, no,” Sehun said, squeezing his eyes shut and rubbing his hands over his face. “No, no.”
“Xiumin hyung?” Chen asked, leaving the room.
They found Xiumin in his room, staring into his closet, looking lost. “Hyung,” Chen said, putting a hand on his arm.
“I don’t know what to do,” Xiumin said, still staring into his closet, patting a helpless hand over his hair. “All I can think of is that I should pack, I should be packing.”
Packing? “No,” D.O. said, but he was late; everyone else was already saying it. “No, no packing, nobody’s packing,” Baekhyun said.
“There’s nothing to pack for, you’re not going anywhere,” Chen said.
“I had sex with him.” Xiumin finally turned, his wide eyes staring at them now. “I was in their dorm, I had sex with them.”
“But nobody knows that, right?” Chanyeol asked.
“There are photos of their three-way,” Kai said. “Nobody took photos of you, right?”
“Their careers are over right now,” Xiumin said. “They’re losing everything, they’re desperate, why wouldn’t they take EXO down with them? They’re going to tell everybody, they’re going to give out every detail they can remember, what I did and how I like it and what everything looks like down there.”
It hurt D.O. to see him this desperate. It was scary. “Management won’t let that happen,” Chanyeol said. “That’s the point of being with a big company like SM, isn’t it? They’re supposed to be able to take care of problems like this.”
“Let’s see what Suho says,” Lay said.
“God, Suho,” Xiumin said, and Chen hugged him, murmuring reassuring things.
“This is bad,” Chanyeol said. “This is really bad.”
“That’s not helping,” D.O. said.
“But it’s true,” Kai said. “This is really bad.”
D.O. wanted to punch him. “Not helping.”
“Where’s the maknae?” Baekhyun asked, looking around.
“I’ll get him,” D.O. said. He had to think. He needed to know what management was saying. What Suho was thinking. He needed to get to his phone and talk to Changjo.
Sehun was in their room. On the phone. And it only took D.O. a second to figure out why. “…don’t want to leave some strange message,” he was saying. “But you’re not answering and I don’t know if I’ll be able to call again for a while. I just wanted to tell you, I know that we were going to get together to watch that drama. And I don’t know if I’ll be able to make it, this time. But that doesn’t mean that we’ll never be able to see it. I just might not be able to do it this week. I still want to watch it with you. I honor my commitments, sunbaenim, I take them seriously.” He looked tense, frustrated, even anguished, but his voice sounded direct and controlled, like he was explaining something very important and wanted to be sure that L.Joe understood him.
He hung up, and D.O. didn’t bother to remind him that Suho had said that they shouldn’t touch their phones. “Go check on Xiumin hyung.”
Sehun closed his eyes and just stood there for a minute. He pressed his lips together like he was holding something in, something it was hard to control. After a while, he exhaled, and when he opened his eyes he checked his phone. He didn’t see whatever he was looking for, probably a text from L.Joe. Then he said, “Yeah,” to D.O., and he left the room.
D.O. picked up his own phone and called Changjo.
“Yes?” Changjo asked immediately.
“What’s happening?” D.O. asked. “What can I do?”
“Nothing,” Changjo said. “Don’t do anything, you’ll only cause more problems. Just stay with Suho hyung and keep him calm. Be boring, quiet, respectable SM good boys, all of you. Whoop, gotta go.” He hung up.
Changjo would protect Suho. Protecting Suho meant protecting EXO; Changjo had to understand that.
D.O. set his phone aside. Keep Suho calm. Be quiet and boring.
Hearing raised voices, he drifted back to Xiumin’s room.
“-think you’re lecturing me?” Xiumin demanded. “Am I the only one who’s screwing around? Am I the only one who’s ever risked getting caught? It happened this way, but it could’ve been you! It could’ve been any of you! You’re freaking lucky it was me and not you and your fucking sex slave!”
“Whoa, whoa,” Chen said, as Chanyeol said, “Hey, no,” and Sehun shouted, “Don’t you ever fucking call him that! I’ve been careful, and now I might never see him again because of you?!”
“Suho hyung won’t keep you and L.Joe away from each other, he promised it wouldn’t come to that,” Lay said.
“What about C.A.P. hyung?” Sehun demanded. “What if C.A.P. hyung decides that it’s not worth it? What if Teen Top decides that we’re a liability? What if Infinite decides that it’s not worth the risk? You’re the one who fucked up, you’re the one who couldn’t keep it in his pants, you’re the one who had to run around screwing every hot idol you could get your cock in, and now L.Joe sunbae might never answer my fucking calls ever again!”
“Okay, this news dropped like ten minutes ago,” Chanyeol said. “Let’s not all lose our shit, we don’t know what’s going on.”
“Jumping to conclusions won’t help,” Chen agreed.
“It’s not jumping very far,” Kai said. “Xiumin hyung’s right, it could’ve happened to anybody. Except it happened to him, because he screwed around with the wrong guys. Suho hyung’s been really careful in making sure that we’re only with idols that he’s sure about. He went and he talked with Andy sunbaenim before he ever met anyone in Teen Top. He knew that Infinite was safe because they’d already been with Shinee. You just met a couple of hot guys in a dressing room and went back to their dorm with them. You have bad judgment, and now what? Even if we’re still allowed to see our friends, are they going to want to see us? If I were them, I wouldn’t.”
“It could’ve just as easily been Woohyun hyung or somebody, not Xiumin hyung,” Chen said. “He’s not the only one who screws around. I don’t think that pinning all of the blame on one person does anybody any good.”
“No, fine, blame me,” Xiumin snapped. “Blame me, it’s great, I’m the fuck-up, I’m the only one who ever took a risk, you’ve never done anything you shouldn’t have.”
Kai opened his mouth, and D.O. said, “Shut up.” He glared at Sehun. “You, too.” He gave his hyungs a hard look. “We’re not going to panic over this. We’re going to lay low for a while, and keep our mouths shut, and not cause a bunch of extra problems. We’re going to be polite and boring and act like we don’t even know that anything’s going on. And we’re going to keep Suho hyung calm, too. That’s our job right now. Making sure that Suho hyung’s okay.”
“How can he be okay?” Baekhyun asked. “He has to be losing it.”
“Then if we lose it, too, that won’t help,” Lay said.
“Who put you in charge?” Xiumin asked D.O.
“I talked to Changjo,” he said, and turned away. “Come on, we have to act normal.”
Normal? Baekhyun guessed that this was kind of normal. They’d ordered food, and they were all slumped on and around the couch, eating and playing videogames. They were pretending to be okay. But everybody was anxious; half of them were scared and half of them were pissed off. And no one was making out. So it wasn’t really normal at all.
Beside him, Chen shifted for the eight hundredth time in five seconds. God, Chen made a terrible pillow tonight. “What? Hold still,” he complained, pushing Chen back into position.
“How long are we supposed to stay away from our phones?” Chen asked.
“Until Suho hyung says, I guess.” He was trying not to worry about it too much. Suho wouldn’t actually forbid them to use their phones at all. Right?
“I want to talk to Hoya hyung. I just want to check in with him.”
Baekhyun groaned, rolling his eyes. “For thirty seconds, I actually forgot that you had a boyfriend. He’s fine, you can talk to him later.”
“Great, another casualty,” Sehun said. “That’s me and L.Joe sunbae, Chen hyung and Hoya hyung, Suho hyung and Sunggyu hyung, who else?”
Xiumin got up and walked away. His bedroom door slammed shut. Baekhyun flinched away from the furious bang.
After L got offstage, he changed back into his street clothes, and they had a team meeting. It was late when they got into the van and things were finally quiet and still enough for him to check his phone.
Changjo had texted him. Check the news. W-group. Our hyung’s hyung met them before. I can’t talk to you but I’ll be busy. Delete everything and don’t worry.
L frowned, translating. “Which idol group starts with a W?”
“Winner?” Sungyeol guessed.
“Winfinite?” Hoya asked. “Whinee? Wooper Junior?”
Woohyun was on the phone. “Ya, our Kibum-ah, what is it?” Frowning, he gestured to Sunggyu to listen. “I’m putting you on speaker.”
“Don’t put me on speaker,” Key said.
“Too late,” Woohyun said. “We’re in the van. What about Westonic?”
“They were caught screwing each other,” Key said flatly. “Everyone’s talking about it. I’m going to be too busy to see you for a while, but good luck with rehearsals.”
“Shit,” Sungyeol said.
“Caught doing what?” Dongwoo asked.
“Okay, I won’t call you, I’ll wait for you to call me,” Woohyun said.
“Goddamned amateurs,” Key muttered. “We’re going to be in Japan for a week, anyway, but it’ll be thirty days at least, maybe longer.”
Shit. L pulled up the browser on his phone. Beside him, Sungyeol was already scrolling around.
“I understand,” Woohyun said. “I love you. Work hard.”
“I love you, too,” Key said, and hung up.
“Thirty days?” Hoya asked. “Is EXO going to be off-limits for thirty days, too?”
Our hyung’s hyung. If their joint hyung was Suho, then their hyung’s hyung was Xiumin. Oh, shit.
“Holy shit,” Sungyeol said. “They really did get caught. Their rapper and their visual had sex with a paid escort, a woman, but they did more with each other than with her. It’s, fuck, it’s everywhere. She took photos, she’s doing interviews, everyone’s digging up more dirt and evidence.”
“Oh, those poor kids,” Dongwoo said.
“Stupid kids,” Sungjong said.
“Ya,” Sunggyu said sharply. “All of you, right now, listen to me.” Six heads swiveled obediently in his direction. “Clean up your phones, get everything off of them, all of it, I don’t care what it is. Then give them to me. As soon as we get to the dorm, clean off your computers, too, no excuses. No contact outside the group until I say so. No dates, no friends, no reporters, no gossiping with stylists, pretend you don’t know what’s going on and you don’t really care and it has nothing to do with you. We’re focused on work, and that’s it.”
“This isn’t a joke,” Sungyeol said. “This is really happening.”
“I have to tell Chunji,” Dongwoo said.
“No dates, no calls, nothing,” Sunggyu said firmly. “Clean your phone and give it to me.”
“Teen Top already knows about it,” L told Dongwoo. “Chunji probably couldn’t answer even if you tried to call.” If Infinite’s phones were being taken away, Teen Top’s were, too.
L didn’t have a lot on his phone. He knew that if he tried to read through Changjo’s text messages before he deleted them, he wouldn’t want to get rid of them, so he forced himself to delete everything without even looking at it first. He felt like he was erasing a part of their history together. All of those sweet, sexy moments, all of Changjo’s cute, flirty comments, every time Changjo had asked him for a selca, it was gone forever.
He had to fight with himself not to call Suho. He could only imagine what Suho was going through.
At the dorm, he gave Sunggyu his phone. When Sunggyu turned away, he said, “Ah, hyung.”
Sunggyu turned to him, annoyed, impatient.
He hesitated, but he had to say it. “I think that Xiumin hyung might have had sex with Westonic before.”
Sunggyu’s eyes narrowed. “Who else knows?”
“Changjo told me. I don’t know how he knows.”
“When, when did it happen?”
“I don’t know, I don’t know anything about it. Changjo just said that Xiumin hyung met them, before.”
“What else do you know, anything else?”
He shook his head.
Sunggyu grabbed Dongwoo, who was passing by, and shoved the stack of phones at him. “Put these in my room. Ya! Kids!” Heads poked out of doorways. “Don’t touch your phones, don’t contact anyone, don’t even open the door until I get back.”
“Where are you going?” Dongwoo asked.
“Woollim. I’ll be back late. Stay out of trouble.”
“We won’t do anything,” Woohyun promised.
“No Key,” Sunggyu warned. “No Chunji. No Changjo. No Chen. No anybody.”
With Sunggyu gone, the dorm was quiet. Sungjong was busy cleaning things off of his computer. Sungyeol was surfing from one gossip site to another, reading about the scandal. L slumped on the couch and thought about Suho. About Xiumin. About Changjo.
Suho had promised not to abandon him again. Suho had promised to stay by his side, no matter what. Suho had promised that it would all be different this time.
Different. This time, instead of EXO ditching Infinite, it might be Infinite ditching EXO.
C.A.P. lined up his members in front of him on the couch. When they finally figured out how to sit still, he stared them down. “I talked to Andy hyung.”
“We know that,” Niel said.
“What’d he say?” Changjo asked.
“What did he say about Oh Sehun?” L.Joe asked.
“Give me a freaking break,” Chunji said, staring at L.Joe. “You’re like a walking joke. Shut up about Oh Sehun for once.”
“You shut up for once,” L.Joe muttered, looking disgusted.
“No,” Chunji said, immediately challenging. “You shut up.”
“You shut up,” L.Joe snapped, making a threatening move.
Chunji hit first, but L.Joe punched like he meant it. C.A.P. smacked them both upside the head, then snatched up Ricky by one arm and shoved him in between them on the couch. “Everybody shut up!”
“Sorry, quiet now,” Niel said.
Ricky sighed, fixing his shirt and grimly taking it when both Chunji and L.Joe elbowed him hard.
C.A.P. didn’t give them time to start arguing again. “We’re taking a break from extracurricular sex for a while.”
“No,” L.Joe said, head snapping up, eyes wide.
“How long is a while?” Chunji asked.
“I’ll give your phones back when it’s over,” he said.
“But I can use Ricky’s computer, right?” Changjo asked. “I need Internet access.”
“For what?” C.A.P. asked.
Niel put his hands over his ears.
“To help Suho hyung,” Changjo said.
“I think that SM’s going to make sure that Westonic doesn’t say anything about Xiumin hyung,” Changjo said. “I think they’ll keep their mouths shut about it. But I don’t know who else saw what. There might be photos, someone might have seen him going in and out of their dorm, stuff like that. But if Westonic had sex with Xiumin hyung, then they had sex with other guys. Their visual even told me about some of it. So if there are rumors about a dozen different idols from a dozen different groups, then everyone’s going to be pointing fingers and speculating, and everyone in the industry’s going to get caught up in it, and it can’t all be true, right? If you spread the gossip around far enough and wide enough, it loses its power.”
“You make sure that the Net’s flooded with idol rumors,” Ricky said, nodding. “Then no one’s focusing on Xiumin hyung anymore.”
“But you’ll get other guys in trouble,” L.Joe said, frowning.
Niel still had his hands over his ears and was humming to himself, eyes scanning the ceiling.
Changjo nudged Chunji. “Anybody you want me to fuck up for you?”
Chunji grinned. “I’ll write you a list.”
“Run your list by me first, before you do anything,” C.A.P. warned. Changjo nodded at him. “Okay.” He lowered Niel’s hands. “No sex, no flirting, no going out. Keep your head down, we don’t even talk to other idols. Or staff, or anyone else. It’s all business, all of the time.” One wrong comment to one wrong person could fuck up their world. “I’ll let you know if I hear anything from Sunggyu hyung or Suho hyung.” Ricky’s mouth opened. “Or Onew hyung.” Ricky subsided. “Since Westonic hired a sex worker, there might be a criminal investigation. This is serious. That means a no tolerance policy on your bullshit. That means no flirting with anybody, no sneaking around, no fake-accidentally bumping into someone backstage, no practice room visits, and no, I swear to god, no Oh Sehun. Got it?”
Niel and Ricky nodded. Chunji said, “Okay,” and Changjo said, “Got it.”
L.Joe ran his hand through his hair and looked frustrated.
C.A.P. glared at L.Joe. Then he asked Chunji, “Can Teen Top count on you?”
“Yes,” Chunji said.
“Can Teen Top count on you?”
“Always,” Niel said.
“Can Teen Top count on you?”
“Yes, hyung,” Ricky said.
“Can Teen Top count on you?”
“Yes,” Changjo said.
“Abso-freaking-lutely,” Niel said, and high-fived Chunji.
C.A.P. stared L.Joe down. “Can Teen Top count on you?”
For half of a second, L.Joe hesitated, like he wanted to argue. Knowing him, C.A.P. let him have that half second, let him get over it. Then he said, “Yes,” and nodded. “Yes. You can count on me.”
“Good, hyung,” Ricky said, patting his shoulder.
“Because if we can’t count on you, you’ll fit in the closet,” Niel said. “You can just stay in there for a while until this is all over.”
“Hell, he’ll fit under the bed,” Chunji said.
“He’s so little, he’d fit under the sink in the kitchen,” Changjo said.
“Let’s find out,” Chunji suggested, getting up.
“Ya! What - - hey - - no! No!” L.Joe protested as his members grabbed him. “Fuck you!”
Oh, he’d definitely fit. “Maknae, move the buckets and crap out of there first,” C.A.P. said, dodging a swing and grabbing an ankle, lifting L.Joe off-balance. He was sure that as soon as they’d tested it with L.Joe, they’d move on to other members, and when it ended up on his turn, he was going to want to be comfortable in there.
Management wanted to talk to Suho’s members, but he insisted, as firmly as he could while still being deferential, that he’d handle it himself. Finally, at the end of an exhausting talk, management left.
He took a moment to get his thoughts in order. But only a moment, because he knew that his members needed to hear from him.
To his surprise, the dorm was calm. Half of his members were asleep on the sofa, slumped across each other. D.O. was seated in front of the couch, playing a videogame. Xiumin was seated beside D.O., tucked into a tiny, tense ball, wide-eyed and vibrating with tension. With intense focus, Sehun was slowly, very carefully knotting string in complicated patterns around Baekhyun’s limp ankle.
“Maknae,” Suho said.
Xiumin’s head snapped up, and he stared at Suho, looking terrified. Sehun didn’t react at all, like Suho hadn’t spoken.
“Wake up our members, it’s time to talk.”
“I’ll do it,” D.O. said, turning around. He smacked a couple of thighs and poked a couple of ribcages. “Up, up, everybody up, Suho hyung wants to talk to us.”
Xiumin stood up, swallowing nervously. He was so miserable, he looked like he was in pain. “I, should I.” He hugged himself, looking wounded. “Suho.”
It was bad, but it wasn’t that bad. “Don’t act so guilty,” Suho said, hugging him. “You didn’t murder anybody.”
“Oh, god,” Xiumin said, sounding so relieved that Suho felt better just hearing it. He hugged Suho tightly, moaning. “I feel like I did, though.”
“It’s okay,” Suho promised him, patting his back. “It’ll be okay.”
“Will it?” Baekhyun asked.
“Oh, thank god,” Chanyeol said, sitting up.
“What - - shit, maknae, what are you doing to me?” Baekhyun asked.
“Hoya hyung,” Chen mumbled, his face smushed against Kai’s ribcage.
“Wake up,” Chanyeol said, pulling on his arm. When he swayed upright, Chanyeol tousled Kai’s hair and patted Lay’s side to wake them up. “Suho hyung’s not freaking out.”
“There’s nothing to freak out about,” D.O. said.
“Well, that’s not true,” Suho said, letting go of Xiumin. “There’s a lot to freak out about. But I want to talk about it, so we can decide what to do as a group.” After the last time he’d turned their private lives upside-down, they’d agreed to create a sexual democracy and lay out the rules jointly. He wanted to honor that.
Yawning, Lay blinked his eyes open. “What did management say?”
“What did Sunggyu hyung say?” Chen asked. “Did you talk to him?”
“Did you talk to C.A.P. hyung?” Sehun asked.
“Seriously, untie me,” Baekhyun said.
Sehun tucked his lips in unhappily and started picking at the knots he’d made.
Suho sat on the edge of a chair, facing his members. “I haven’t talked to Sunggyu hyung or C.A.P. yet. I thought that we should talk, first.” He hoped that they would all be responsible and understanding about this. “The rules from management aren’t negotiable. All of our SM sunbaes, the whole’s company’s going to take thirty days off from our social lives. We can’t afford to do anything that would draw attention or start rumors. Whether it’s directly related to Westonic or not, the company doesn’t want what’s private to become public. That means no dates and no visits. Not even at dorms or practice rooms, nowhere. And no phone calls or texts or anything like that. I don’t want to take your phones away from you altogether, because you need to stay in touch with family, and we need to be able to call each other and management for things. But if you answer the phone for any idol outside of SM, I’ll have to take it from you.”
“Thirty days,” Sehun said, eyebrows coming together.
“That’s not too long,” D.O. said. “It’s like if we have to be in China for a couple of weeks, and then Teen Top has to be in Japan, and we just don’t have time to see each other.”
“But no calls or texts or anything,” Lay said. “We can see each other backstage?”
“No,” Suho said. “Management thinks that it’ll be best if we stick to ourselves for a month. And then, when thirty days are over, they’ll see what the situation is. Things should be quiet by then, we hope.”
“So it could be sixty days?” Baekhyun asked.
“It could be forever,” Kai said.
“We’ll deal with it,” D.O. said, nodding at Suho.
“I think that the first thirty days will be okay,” Suho said. “It’s not only for our sake, it’s to protect Teen Top and Infinite, too. I want them to be safe, and it’s best for them if they’re not too close to us right now.”
“Because of Xiumin hyung,” Sehun said.
“We’re one,” Suho told him. “Whatever happens to EXO, it happens to all of us. We all agreed, together, that it was okay for Xiumin hyung to make his own decisions. We all agreed, together, to trust him. Maybe his judgment wasn’t perfect, but maybe ours wasn’t, either. We all took the same risks together.”
“We trusted him, and we shouldn’t have,” Sehun said. “That’s what you’re saying.”
Suho gave him a stern look. “Maknae. This isn’t the time to have an attitude. We’re all going through something right now, not only you.” He waited, and when Sehun’s gaze dropped, he turned his attention to the other members. “I think that thirty days should be enough, and when that time’s up, I’m going to push as hard as I can for the break to be over. Does anyone disagree with that?”
“You - - you want to get back together with Infinite and Teen Top?” Baekhyun asked, his gaze skittering to the other members like he wanted to know if they saw what he saw.
“You don’t want to cut them off?” Chanyeol asked.
“I made promises that I need to keep,” Suho said. “I meant what I said to our sunbaes.” He licked his lips. This was the hard part. This was the painful, damning part. “I just don’t know if they’ll want me to keep those promises. They might not want to see us anymore. They might think that thirty days isn’t long enough to stay away from us.”
“Because of me,” Xiumin said.
He didn’t want to blame Xiumin. If he blamed anyone, he blamed himself. “They might think that EXO is a risk.”
“Oh, this isn’t good,” Chanyeol moaned, rubbing the sides of his neck.
Suho had made a lot of promises. To Teen Top and Infinite, that he’d stand beside them. To Changjo and to L, that he’d take care of them. To L.Joe. To Sunggyu. And he wasn’t giving up on any of that. He’d already made that mistake, once, and he wouldn’t abandon any of them ever again. But if they needed to run away from him, what could he do? All of his worrying, all of his rules, all of the times he’d gone back and forth about whether it was safe to let his members date around, and now this. EXO was the problem. His own EXO member was the one jeopardizing everyone else’s reputation. It was humiliating, and agonizing, and humbling.
“So we wait thirty days,” D.O. said.
“I’m going to contact Sunggyu hyung and C.A.P.,” Suho said. “If they’ll talk to me, I’ll explain and apologize. And then we’ll spend a month missing our friends and doing some reflecting.”
“Are you okay?” Chen asked. “About Sunggyu hyung? And Changjo, and L, and - - how many boyfriends do you have?”
He hesitated. He wanted to put on a good face, for his members’ sake. But it was important to be honest, too. “I’m upset. I’m worried about it. But I can only do so much right now.” Everything was so up in the air, everything was still so new, that he was still recovering from his panic. He didn’t have any idea how he could make things right again, but he’d try. The fact that he’d put Infinite and Teen Top in danger, that he’d jeopardized his beloved sunbaes’ careers, that L and Changjo were going to have to turn away from him, it was killing him, and it had barely sunk in yet. What was going to happen to Sehun and L.Joe? What did Sunggyu think of him right now? C.A.P. would never speak to him again, he was sure of it, he just didn’t know how to face it.
“Thirty days,” D.O. said. “So we’re on vacation until the eighteenth.”
“In prison until the eighteenth,” Baekhyun said.
“In hell until the eighteenth,” Sehun said grimly, still untying Baekhyun’s ankle.
“Maknae,” D.O. said seriously. “I will punch you if you don’t get it together.”
“What the hell,” Sehun said, looking mortally offended. “Of course you don’t care! Your boyfriend is right there! Here! He’s right here!” he exclaimed, grabbing Kai’s leg.
“Wait, though,” Lay said. “D.O. doesn’t do even half of what we do, but he doesn’t argue about the risks we take. You have your own sub, and he doesn’t say anything about it. Xiumin hyung has sex with all kinds of guys, and D.O. doesn’t say anything about it. Chen has a boyfriend, Suho’s dating around, all kinds of idols know all kinds of things about us and have done all kinds of things to us, and he doesn’t say anything about it. If he wants to be pissed off that we’ve screwed up his whole career, he could be, but he’s not. If he’s not complaining, what are you complaining about? You took risks, you got laid, you got to have your fun. We all did.”
“I had some fun,” D.O. said. “I’ve had a lot of fun.”
“We all agreed to the same risks, together,” Suho said. “Let’s take this time to think a lot about the risks we’re willing to take in the future. We have thirty days to figure it out, so let’s take it seriously.”
“Yeah, okay,” Chanyeol said.
“You’re being really calm about this,” Baekhyun said, eyeing Suho nervously.
“It’s a little freaky,” Chanyeol said.
“What can I do about, I mean, shouldn’t we be planning what I’m going to say?” Xiumin asked. “About Westonic?”
“No, you’re never going to say anything about it,” Suho said. “Not ever, not to anyone. Management’s going to take care of it, they’ll make sure that everyone stays quiet.” He looked at Xiumin seriously. “Is there anything that I need to know? Did you do anything specific, are there any photos, anything like that?”
“No! God, no,” Xiumin said hurriedly. “It was all normal, basic stuff.”
“How many times did you see them?”
“Just once. I wasn’t really comfortable with it, so I didn’t go back. They wanted to try things that I don’t do.” He hesitated, looking reluctant, and then he admitted, “I think a couple of them were high. It just wasn’t a good scene. They asked me to come over again a couple of times, but I acted like management wouldn’t let me.”
Suho had to know. “Did you get high with them? Did you take anything?”
“No! Jesus, Suho, I already drink too much and screw around too much, I’m not trying to pick up a drug habit, too.”
Chen laughed. “That was honest, at least.”
“I’m sorry,” Xiumin said. He looked exhausted. “I’m really sorry. I won’t screw around anymore, I won’t see anyone outside of SM if you don’t want me to.”
Suho nodded. “Let’s think it over, and we’ll make a decision at the end of the month.”
When Suho left to go call the other leaders, Chen followed him. At the doorway to their bedroom, he turned, looking very unhappy but patient. “You need something?”
He was trying really, really hard to be mature and not selfish about this. “I can’t talk to Hoya hyung, right? But if you talk to Sunggyu hyung, could you at least say something? Pass along a message?”
“What kind of message?”
“I don’t know. Whatever you can say over the phone. Tell him that I love him, tell him that I miss him already, ask him if he’ll wait for me. Tell him that I’m sorry, beg him to give me a chance.” It was horrible, being cut off from each other so suddenly. He hadn’t had a chance to explain or say good-bye. If they had five minutes, at least, he could find out how Hoya felt. He had no idea if Hoya was resentful or accepting or betrayed or what, and he couldn’t stand it.
“I’ll try,” Suho said. He looked really troubled, his eyebrows knitting together, his lower lip poking out in a worried pout. “I don’t know if Sunggyu hyung will even speak to me.”
Oh, no! “Hyung,” Chen said, hugging him. “Don’t be like this. He loves you, of course he’ll talk to you.”
“If that’s how things are, then why are you so worried about Hoya?” Suho asked. “Of course I’m worried about Sunggyu hyung. This whole scandal wouldn’t have anything to do with Infinite if it weren’t for me.”
Chen searched for comforting words, but all he could do was hug Suho again.
Suho read the text message again, and then again.
Thirty days off? I understand. We’ll talk then.
He was so baffled, he couldn’t figure out how Sunggyu seemed to be mid-conversation with him when he’d never said anything. How did Sunggyu know about the thirty days? Was Sunggyu omniscient? He’d wondered about that before, but this was going too far.
Finally, it occurred to him that since Shinee was under the same thirty-day restriction, Sunggyu might know about it that way.
So this was it. It had already been decided for him, by management and Sunggyu. No contact for thirty days. If Sunggyu had already said, “We’ll talk then,” there was no room for him to reach out.
He read the words over and over, scouring them intently, doing everything but flipping his phone upside-down to read that way. He searched for nuance, for some hidden meaning. Sunggyu didn’t sound angry. “I understand,” that was a good sign, wasn’t it? Maybe Sunggyu wasn’t as furious as he’d thought. Maybe Sunggyu didn’t hate him completely.
He remembered the night that they’d really confessed to everything and committed to each other. He remembered the promises that Sunggyu had made. He remembered how Sunggyu had said that a leader’s responsibility was real, and then, “A hyung’s responsibility is real, too. When foolish kids broke my members’ hearts in the past, I turned my back on those kids. If that happens now, with EXO, I won’t leave you. I won’t sacrifice you so easily. If you want a commitment that I’ll stand beside you, I can give you that.”
Sunggyu had vowed to hold onto him even if things fell apart between their members. But this was more serious than that. This wasn’t a personal problem, this was a professional problem. This scandal didn’t threaten to hurt feelings, it threatened to destroy careers.
Suho knew that SM would look out for EXO, and there was a good chance that the scandal wouldn’t bring them down. But this all proved that EXO was a risk. And Sunggyu might decide that it wasn’t a risk worth taking.
Nibbling on his lip, he thought hard about how to reply. He shouldn’t reply at all, but he had to. Not only for himself, but for Chen, too. Finally, he sent: I’ll apologize on the eighteenth, and I’ll reflect until then. Please tell Hoya to think badly only of me, not anyone else.
That would have to do. Now all he could do was wait.
C.A.P. picked up his phone. “Hey.”
“You know about it?” Sunggyu asked.
“That company’s going quiet for thirty days.”
“Okay.” He wasn’t surprised.
“We’ll do the same? Heads down, focusing on work?”
“That’s the plan.”
“Is that dancing boy up to anything I need to know about?”
“Nothing you need to know about.”
Sunggyu grunted. “See you in a month, then.”
It was good to have an ally. “See you then.”
Not long after, he got another call. “Sunbaenim?”
“It’s unfortunate,” Onew said. “Shinee will be very busy for a while. I won’t be able to see anyone or take calls. We’ll be focused on our work. Maybe a month from now, our calendar will be lighter and I’ll be able to talk again.”
“You’ll explain to your members? I’m very regretful, and I want them to understand that.”
“I’ll let them know that you’re sorry, but they’ll understand.” Ricky was professional enough and mature enough not to take it personally.
“No one in Teen Top is involved in any new problems coming up?”
“You should be talking to Suho hyung about that, not me.”
For a second, Onew was silent. Then he said, “You have something precious of mine. Take good care of it until I can get back.”
“I always do.” Long before Onew had ever shown up, and long after Onew would be gone.
“If any problems come up, tell me.”
“Don’t be too stubborn to ask for help.”
He looked over at Niel, asleep in the next bed. “I won’t be.”
The last call was from Suho. “Hyung.”
“You answered,” Suho said, sounding surprised.
“Calling to tell me that you’ll be busy for the next four weeks but after about a month things might clear back up?”
“Ah, yes. Does Onew hyung move so much faster than I do?”
“It’s a sunbae thing.”
“I guess so. I…” He broke off. “Will you tell your members how sorry I am? Will you tell Changjo? And L.Joe? And all of them?”
“After we see what happens, maybe you can tell them yourself.”
“Maybe,” Suho repeated to himself.
C.A.P. didn’t reply. Teen Top’s future with EXO was up in the air, and he wasn’t going to say a lot of reassuring things to make Suho feel better about that.
“I… We’ll talk in thirty days, then.”
The first few days were awful.
Kai was pissed off at Xiumin. Chen was worried about Hoya. Sehun’s mood was terrible. Suho was anxious and unhappy. Chanyeol kept reading all of the gossip on-line and telling them the horrible things that people were saying. Xiumin seemed physically ill.
If it hadn’t been for D.O. and Lay, Baekhyun would’ve wanted to burrow under the covers and not come out again for a month. But D.O. and Lay were so calm and reasonable, they reassured him. They comforted Chen and Xiumin, and they told Chanyeol and Kai to knock it off, and they scolded Sehun, and they talked to Suho like there was nothing to worry about. D.O. kept everybody distracted from the scandal by getting them to focus on work. Lay said things like, “Ah, Baekhyun-ah, don’t look so sad,” and pulled him aside for long, thorough make-out sessions that made him feel so sexy and drunk he forgot all about anything else for a while.
Finally, D.O. asked Chanyeol, “Aren’t you supposed to be our vitamin? Our mood-maker? Why are you creating such an awful mood?” After that, Chanyeol pulled Baekhyun and Chen together, and the three of them came up with a month-long plan. They plotted out dorm activities to keep everyone occupied. Game nights, and theme movie nights, and maybe orgy nights, later in the month.
“We should do something for the maknae,” Chen suggested.
“Why?” Chanyeol asked.
“Because he’s too upset about L.Joe, and he’s only going to act out more. If he can’t see L.Joe, we should give him a - - a release, a target.”
“A sub?” Baekhyun asked. “Not me!”
“Not me, either,” Chanyeol said, wide-eyed. “That kid’s dangerous.”
“It doesn’t have to be sexual,” Chen said. “Just let him be in charge for a night. Let him order us around.”
“Yaja time,” Chanyeol said.
“Sure!” Chen agreed. When Baekhyun grimaced, he laughed. “It won’t be so bad! We’ll just do it once or twice. No-sex yaja time.”
“Okay, but let’s put it off as long as we can,” Baekhyun said. “The mood Kai’s in now, I don’t want him in charge, either.”
Lonely, adrift, Onew wandered into Taemin’s room. Taemin was on the bed. Key was digging through the closet. He sat down on the bed and stroked Taemin’s hair. Watching Key, he asked, “Don’t you miss Woohyun?”
“No. Of course not.”
“He does,” Taemin said. He smiled. “Do you miss your lovely Ricky?”
“I’m sad without him,” Onew admitted. “It’s awful.” He caressed Taemin’s ear. “Can I buy you cupcakes?”
Taemin chuckled. “Sure, hyung.”
Key stripped out of his shirt and put on one of Taemin’s. “I was supposed to see him next week,” he told the mirror, fixing his hair. “We were going to the safehouse.”
Onew knew all about it; he’d okayed it. “You can go next month.”
“If we all survive this month.” He tucked the shirt in and turned from side to side, eyeing himself in the mirror. “Everything might be okay and it might all go back to normal. Or Xiumin hyung might have to disappear. Or EXO might have to disappear. Or Sunggyu hyung might cut me off for good. Or C.A.P. might decide that pissing you off and taking Ricky away is better than letting rumors bring him down. So there are a lot of great possibilities in front of us.” He pulled the shirt off over his head and threw it into the trash can. “That shirt’s literal garbage, I look better naked.”
“You look great naked,” Taemin said. “And don’t throw away my clothes, I love that shirt.”
Crossing his arms over his chest, Key glared at Onew. “You’re going to be buying Taemin cupcakes forever, and I’m never going to that safehouse again. This is our new life, this is how things are going to be from now on.”
“You’re overreacting,” Onew told him. “Scandals happen. It’s the industry we’re in, everything’s a risk, I can say the wrong thing in an interview and this could all be over tomorrow. Sunggyu knows that. C.A.P. knows it.” Getting up, Onew rubbed his tense upper arm. “No one’s breaking up. It’s only a month. It’ll be over soon.”
Key kept bristling with tension, his expression tight, his gaze burning into Onew like a furious laser. And then he said, “Okay. But if Sunggyu hyung tries to pull back, you’re going to have to fight him for me.”
“I won’t need to,” Onew said. “When has Kim Sunggyu not given Nam Woohyun everything that he wanted?”
Key almost smiled at that, and then he hugged Onew. “God, I’m a freaking wreck. I hate this. Make me feel better.”
Whenever Key said that to Jonghyun, he always knew exactly what to do. Onew wasn’t so sure. Nothing came to mind. “Do you want to dye Taemin’s hair?”
Key rested his chin on Onew’s shoulder. “Which color?”
“No,” Taemin said earnestly. “No, no. Do something else instead. Go have sex for a while, go do that.”
“I’m not in the mood,” Key said. Then he pulled back, eyeing Onew’s body. He smiled a little, and then he gave Onew a coy, flirty look. “But maybe you could convince me.”
Chen was so worried about Hoya, his anxiety was like a dark cloud hovering over him, day and night. He couldn’t stand this complete break in communication. Not knowing what Hoya was thinking made him afraid of the worst.
He thought constantly of how to get in touch. What he’d say if he could sneak in a phone call. He rehearsed apologies and dwelled on Hoya’s possible responses.
He missed the way Hoya smiled at him. He missed the way Hoya laughed. He missed the sarcasm and the bad puns. God, he missed the way Hoya moved.
He missed the sex so much that he made out with his members over and over again, searching for intimacy, romance, and pleasure. He went down on Lay, closing his eyes and pretending that it was Hoya’s cock in his mouth, stroking himself and sucking fervently.
He wondered if Hoya was thinking of him.
Groaning, Hoya licked his lips. His hips were rolling and he couldn’t keep his eyes open. More moans shuddering out of him, he felt pleasure rise in bright jolts and deep spasms. “Come, I, I’m gonna, oouunnh, oh, unnnh, I’m gonna come.”
L chuckled behind him, thrusting again, pulling on his hips. “Already? I barely got in you.”
The thick push of L’s erection inside him felt fantastic, and he groaned again, his cock aching. He would’ve said “more” or “harder,” but he didn’t have to. L was fucking him expertly, perfectly, giving him exactly what he needed, deep inside him, confident and rhythmic. He couldn’t stop moaning, and every thrust had pleasure doubling in intensity, sending him nearer and nearer to - - “Oh, oh, unnngh!” Crying out, he came, ecstasy exploding into forceful climax. Shaken, moaning, wracked by bliss, he ejaculated thickly, gooey ropes of cum jetting onto the bed. God, it was so good, so good, “Don’t stop,” he panted, loving every deep thrust. “Ooohhh, ohhhh, oh, don’t stop.”
Chanyeol stopped reporting the news to his members, because they said that they didn’t want to hear it. But then they started coming to him anyway, asking for updates. Chen only wanted to hear the basics, but Xiumin wanted to hear all of the gory dirt. Lay always had a lot of questions about what the implications were and what might come next; Suho just listened in grim silence.
He was deep in the comments on a gossip blog when D.O. came in and sat on his bed. “How much are they talking about Xiumin hyung?”
“Some,” he admitted. “But it’s not just Xiumin hyung, it’s everybody.” He rattled off the list of names.
At first, D.O. frowned, but the longer the list went on, the wider D.O.’s eyes got. When he finally finished, D.O. said, “Westonic can’t be connected to all of those people.”
“But they are,” he said. “Everybody, big groups, nobodies. There are photos of everybody going into their dorm, or meeting them in places. Restaurants, karaoke bars, dance clubs, all kinds of places. And then there are reports, all kinds of witnesses saying all kinds of things. Who they hang out with backstage, who they were caught in a bathroom with. And that’s just the male idols. It sounds like their leader was screwing every girl group in the whole industry, and models and actresses, too.”
“What… What is this?” D.O. asked. “Does that mean the entire industry’s going to fall apart?”
He’d been wondering that, too. “No, I think - - it’s like it’s so big, it’s too big. Everybody can deny it now. Like, yeah, there are photos of Xiumin hyung visiting their dorm one time. But there are photos of a hundred other people going in and out, too. The fandoms can’t attack someone else’s oppa because they’ll bring down their own oppa with him, so they all have to protect each other. The companies can’t secretly media play against EXO or SM, because if Xiumin hyung’s some kind of sex criminal for visiting a dorm once, then their idols are just as bad, because they were there, too.”
“Some people would love to believe that the whole industry’s full of corruption and sex,” D.O. said.
“But most people don’t,” Chanyeol said. “I don’t think so. It’s like, it’s fun to speculate, but they don’t actually want to think that all of this is really going on. Everyone’s coming down really, really hard on Westonic, but I think it’s going to stop there. The scandal’s so big now that it’s too big, it involves everybody, ever. And it’s all gossip and rumors, the only real photos of real proof of real sex are of Westonic members, nobody else. Unless someone from Westonic starts confirming some of it and giving names, unless someone has photos of Westonic having sex with someone outside their own group, I think this is as big as it’s going to get.”
“So as long as there’s no proof of Xiumin hyung, or anybody else, we’ll be okay,” D.O. said.
Chanyeol nodded. “I hope so. I think so.”
Changjo missed L.
He was worried about Suho, but he could help Suho. He could do something about it.
He couldn’t do anything about missing L.
He watched clips of L on-line. He watched the same ones over and over again, over and over, for hours, on a loop, until the image of L turning to the camera and smiling was burned into his brain, but he still couldn’t get enough.
He’d been having sex with his members, a lot of sex, but it wasn’t right. He tried to make love with L.Joe, but L.Joe was in a weird place and refused. He made love with Chunji, but it didn’t satisfy him, it wasn’t right. He got C.A.P. to bang the fuck out of him, and that helped; while he was being pounded and drilled, he wasn’t thinking about L.
He schemed; he planned out ways to contact L. That helped; he liked plotting, it made him feel like he was doing something, something other than waiting helplessly for time to pass. He came up with elaborate, convoluted plans and simple plans, but what he really needed was one that wouldn’t get him in trouble.
Naked, laughing, Dongwoo danced out of Sungyeol’s grasp. “Again?”
“Hey, yes, again,” Sungyeol said, catching him and wrapping him up in long arms. “I’ve been watching you give it to everyone else all over the dorm all night, I want mine, too.”
Watching from the couch, L smiled. “Hyungs,” he called. “Sungyeol hyung wants to get laid.”
“Oh, does he?” Woohyun asked, prowling out of his bedroom.
“No, wait, no,” Sungyeol said. “Not like that, this is a private party, just for two.”
“Dongwoo hyung,” L said. “A party’s like sex, isn’t it? The more, the merrier?”
“Yes,” Dongwoo agreed, rubbing his hands over Sungyeol’s chest. “More is better.”
“Hoya,” Woohyun called. “Bring some beer.”
“Seven member party,” Dongwoo said. “Gyu hyung will be home, soon, we’ll have you spread open nice and wide for him.”
“Why do you all have to top all of the time?” Sungyeol demanded.
“You don’t want to be the only bottom?” Woohyun asked. “We’ll take turns on the maknae, too, so it’s not just you.”
“The hell you will,” Sungjong said from his room.
“Maybe Hoya will want to,” Dongwoo suggested.
When Hoya walked in from the kitchen, a six-pack dangling from one hand, L smiled. “Hyung, can we run a train on you?”
“What the hell kind of question is that?” Hoya asked. Then his gaze ran over Woohyun, and he licked his lips. “Out here on the floor, or what?”
Changjo read it again. Then he clicked links and searched and read more. Then he dug deeper. “Hyung!” he shouted.
“Busy!” Niel called back.
“What?” Chunji yelled.
C.A.P. didn’t bother to answer.
“What?” L.Joe asked, coming into the room, a jittery ball of tension. “What, what is it?”
This hyung was no good. “Ricky,” he called, pushing his chair away from the computer.
L.Joe climbed onto him, picking at the front of his shirt, sliding a hand, “Ahh, ooooh, shit,” down the front of his pants. “Can I blow you?” L.Joe asked, fondling his cock, staring at him too intensely. “Can I suck on your big, gorgeous, sexy, hard cock?”
What? A million responses flew to mind, but if he said one wrong word while L.Joe was like this, Chunji would murder him. “Yeah,” was all he said. “Yeah.” Ricky walked in, and he said, “Wait a minute, hyung,” wrapping his arm around L.Joe to make sure that L.Joe didn’t go anywhere. He wanted this to happen, he just had to focus on something else really quick, first.
L.Joe pulled Changjo’s cock out of his pants, looking down at it, rubbing the shaft. God, he was turned on.
“What?” Ricky asked.
“There’s a thing, a…” It was hard to be articulate when L.Joe was jacking him so insistently. “A stylist, she works at one of the salons. Someone interviewed her and she said.” Now he had to go from memory, because his chair was turned aside and he had a lap full of L.Joe. “She said that the Westonic scandal didn’t have to happen, that it all comes down to the class of the company and the class of the idols and trainees they hire. She said that we don’t see these problems with the top companies like the one she works for, or even from the smaller companies like Woollim and TOP Media, because they’re smarter and more careful about hiring good, honest kids.”
“She said Woollim and TOP Media?” Ricky asked.
“You’re so hard,” L.Joe whispered, still stroking his shaft.
Changjo was having trouble explaining all of the pieces he’d put together, because he was hard as a rock and lust was burning through him. Fortunately, he was talking to Ricky, who didn’t need shit to be spelled out. “‘Top companies like the one she works for.’ She’s with SM. Did Onew hyung do this?”
“I can’t prove it.”
“Of course not.” Ricky sat on his bed. “He’s protecting us.”
“Maknae,” L.Joe whispered, jacking him slowly, thumb dragging around the crown. “Oh, maknae, it’s so big.”
God, it was too good, he couldn’t take it anymore. “You can suck it, do you want to?”
Slithering down between his legs, L.Joe moaned. In seconds, L.Joe’s hot mouth surrounded his cock, lips closing snugly around the base of his throbbing shaft.
“Oh, oh, fuck,” Changjo gasped. L.Joe had been off-and-on about sex, but right now, he was definitely on. He wanted Changjo’s cock and, “Oooohhh,” he was getting it. “God, hyung.” Cock pulsing, balls heavy, Changjo slid a hand into his hair, about to explode in his hungry mouth.
“He’s protecting me,” Ricky said thoughtfully. “Get up,” he said, standing. “I want to read it myself.”
“Kind of busy,” Changjo panted, as L.Joe slurped greedily on his cock. L.Joe moaned blissfully, back arching, ass sticking out.
Ricky studied L.Joe, then reached down, rubbing his ass, fingers sliding along the cleft.
L.Joe shuddered, making an ecstatic, mewling sound, and then he sucked so hungrily, Changjo came. Moaning, breathless, Changjo climaxed right then and there, giving up a thick load in L.Joe’s devouring mouth. Swallowing, L.Joe swung his ass from side to side, inviting more.
Giving him a light pat, Ricky straightened. “Okay, up, let me read.”
Xiumin was called into SM for an excruciating meeting. It was humiliating in so many ways, he didn’t know how he could hold his head up, after that.
At the dorm, he sat down and had a long, private talk with Suho and Lay. They talked about Westonic, and scandals in general, and how to navigate trying to have a personal life while being an idol, and whether it was even worth it to try. Honestly, right then, he’d rather have turned celibate than go through any of this again.
It was his turn to be with Suho that night. As they were getting in bed, he said, “I can skip my turn. I’ll understand. Lay won’t mind moving up a night.”
“No. No, things are already difficult enough. I don’t want more changes. I’m trying really hard to keep things normal,” Suho admitted as they settled facing each other. “If you skip a turn because you feel guilty, then I’ll hold back because I feel guilty, and it’ll only get worse from there, and then, you know me. I’ll never have sex again.”
He was kind of surprised that Suho was still having sex; he’d expected Suho to shut down. “Then I should go through with it, tonight, for your sake?”
Pulling him close, Suho rolled over, urging him on top. “I miss being with a hyung,” Suho admitted, cheeks turning pink.
Oooohhh, he meant it, too. “Mmm, it’s different with a hyung, isn’t it?” Xiumin asked, sliding a hand up his inner thigh, teasing up the leg of his underwear, brushing tantalizingly close to his cock. He moaned the way he always did, immediately, helplessly, responding to it, needing it. “It’s good with a hyung.” Xiumin kissed him, a light, teasing kiss, and he gripped Xiumin’s waist, moaning again, lips parting, hungry for more. “Should I call you Young Money while I’m inside you?” Xiumin asked, and he turned red, his knees already rising. Xiumin ran a lazy fingertip around his mouth, skimming over his lips. So good-looking, this dongsaeng, so handsome, so desperate for it. “Or should I call you my pretty little kitten while you’re lapping up my cum?”
Groaning, Suho dragged him down for a kiss.
Sungyeol walked over and dropped down beside L on the couch. “You look phenomenally bored.”
He was. Bored, and unhappy, and other things, too. It was hard on him, missing Changjo, being so distant from Suho. It was really hard. His mind kept going to dark places. His brain kept trying to tell him that this had been inevitable, that the good time never would have lasted anyway, that it would be better to let go now than to try to drag things out.
He was clinging to his members, enjoying his members, because as long as he had them, he wasn’t alone. He wasn’t lost. But he wasn’t going to be okay again until he had Changjo and Suho back. And the hollow feeling in his gut told him that might not ever happen.
He scratched his head. “What did I used to do before I started seeing Suho hyung?” He’d used to do things, hadn’t he? He’d had hobbies or a life. Or maybe not. He remembered being busy with work, but spending less and less time with other people.
“You slept a lot. Hey, want to come with me?”
“Yeah.” Sure, why not? “Where?”
“Woollim. I want to pick up my fan mail. Woohyun said that with the scandal and everything, letters are pouring in. Inspirit wants us to know that they’re standing beside us and they’ll always shield us. Come on.” Sungyeol slapped his thigh and got up. “You probably have a ton of letters.”
They went over to the offices. Their fan mail was waiting in buckets full of letters and packages. L sat on the floor and started reading.
It was amazing. It always was. Some of it made him laugh, and some of it made him cry, and some of it he set aside so that he could send a personal reply. He read, and then someone brought in dinner, and he read some more. Eventually, Sungyeol tried to drag him up to go home, so he grabbed some more on the way out.
He was in bed, reading, when he found an envelope with familiar handwriting. Strange. He felt like he’d seen it before. Maybe it was from a longtime Inspirit.
It addressed him as “L hyung,” so that was interesting.
The letter was short. It only said: On the eighteenth. If everything’s okay by then. Send me a selca.
His heart lurched in his chest.
It was signed, Your dongsaeng.
He bounded out of bed, scattering stationery. He had to know, he had to be sure. Eager, he grabbed his desk chair, kneeling on it backwards.
“What, what’s the emergency?” Sungyeol asked from the other bed, startled.
“Nothing, go back to sleep.” He searched for proof of Changjo’s handwriting. There had to be something. Finding a short letter to fans, he clicked on it. Then he grabbed his letter and shoved it up beside the monitor. Intently, he looked from one to the other, scanning, comparing.
That was Changjo’s real handwriting.
His Changjo had written to him.
Beautiful, brilliant Changjo. Smiling, he folded the letter and tucked it back into its envelope. Then he put it into his desk drawer with his bank books and his passport.
He gathered up the other letters and set them on his nightstand, to read later. Then he took his phone and went into the living room. He didn’t want to disturb Sungyeol. But he had to practice. He had to have the perfect selca to send to Changjo on the eighteenth.
The beagles seemed determined to force fun on their members. They were having some trouble with it, because Kai and Sehun kept refusing to cooperate, and Xiumin kept pulling away. But Suho knew that they meant well, and he thought that it was important for the members to take care of each other, especially when things were so shaky, so he supported the beagles and their month-long plan. There had been horror movie night, and a night of baking and cooking that had destroyed the kitchen, and a night of board games, and a night of watching Lay’s favorite porn, and a multi-night videogame championship.
That night was fan mail night. Management had dropped off batches of fan mail for everyone. It was all opened and pre-sorted, to prevent them from coming across anything objectionable. They all sat in the front room together, and Chanyeol made a big deal of passing the mail out like Santa Claus. They read each other the funniest, cutest bits aloud, and Lay conscientiously wrote out a personal reply to each one.
Some fans made it a point to write on pretty paper adorned with stickers and drawings. Suho opened one letter on plain white printer paper.
I don’t know if you’ll ever see this. If you do, maybe you’ll know that it’s from me. Your favorite dongsaeng in all of creation. I am your favorite, right? Just between us.
You worry a lot, but you don’t have to worry, this time. Everything will be okay. I’ll make sure of it.
You’re probably upset, but don’t go too far. Don’t stop doing things that are good for you. Make sure that you exercise twice a day. Every night and every morning. Your members will help you.
That bold maknae! That audacious, sweet, wonderful maknae. Suho loved him, and this was exactly why Suho loved him. Because he was like this. Because he was clever and thoughtful and generous and daring, just like this.
He’d gone this far? Just to send reassurances. Just to tell Suho that everything would be okay. The dongsaeng taking care of the hyung, again.
Suho wanted to show his members, but he stopped himself. They’d just take Changjo’s idea and start writing fan mail to their friends, and he was supposed to discourage contact. It would only be a couple more weeks.
He slipped the letter into his pocket. He felt strengthened. He felt buoyed. Everything will be okay. He’d really, really needed to hear that, especially from Changjo. He felt like he’d stumbled and fallen, badly, but Changjo was helping him back up, brushing him off, smiling at him and guiding him back onto his feet.
He told himself not to dwell on the, I’ll make sure of it, part. It sounded too ominous. If he let his imagination roam too far, he’d come up with all kinds of dreadful scenarios. The most important message here was that Changjo still supported him.
He was glad that he’d kept having sex. It had been difficult. With everything on the verge of crashing down around him, it had seemed immoral and self-indulgent to cavort around getting laid. But he’d thought that pulling away from his members would only make things worse, would only cause more problems. And it seemed like he’d look ungrateful for all of L and Changjo’s help and support, if he turned his back on all of their advice and abstained all over again. He was glad that, if they got through this month, if he ever had a good moment with his sunbae dongsaengs again, he could report that he hadn’t panicked too much this time.
If Changjo was reaching out, telling him that it would all turn out okay, then Changjo had some hope that C.A.P. wouldn’t cut him off. Changjo’s hope gave him hope, too. There was a chance, then, that they could reconcile with Teen Top. That his members wouldn’t lose everything to this scandal.
Now, if only he could feel so hopeful about Sunggyu.
Sunggyu walked into his room to find Woohyun lounging across his bed. “What?” he asked, and Woohyun grinned at him, sexy and caught. “What, what are you doing here?” he asked, climbing right on top, pinning Woohyun down.
“I just needed someplace to sit, my room’s too noisy,” Woohyun said, happy and submissive under him.
“Then where am I supposed to be, if you’re in here? Where am I supposed to go?”
Arms caught, wrists pinned on either side of his head, Woohyun tried, not very hard at all, to squirm free. “Ya, let go. You don’t have to be like this.”
He liked having this dongsaeng underneath him. It was a familiar position, and it was sending his body all kinds of signals. He kissed Woohyun, and Woohyun pulled both hands free, palms sliding down his back, rubbing over his ass. When he pushed up Woohyun’s T-shirt, Woohyun moaned, back arching, grinding against him, and he grunted, reaching down, undoing his own fly. “Your room’s empty,” he said, and kissed Woohyun again. “I was just there, there’s no one in there.”
Woohyun grinned at him, wicked and seductive, sliding a slow, warm hand into the vee of his open fly. “No? I must have been mistaken.”
“It looks weird if we don’t see anybody at all,” Jonghyun said. “This isn’t normal.”
“Let’s go see Infinite, then,” Key said, sitting up like he was ready to go that very instant.
“Not Infinite,” Onew said. He wished that he could justify going to see Teen Top. His lovely, lovely Ricky had performed at a festival last night, and he’d tried to come up with all kinds of excuses as to why he should go. “We can go and see EXO, if you want.” Jonghyun was right, it might look suspicious if all of a sudden no one visited anyone, period. Taemin and Kai were friends, it would make sense for them to get together.
“EXO?” Key snorted and sat back again, all of his energy vanishing. “Never mind.”
“I’ll go,” Taemin said.
“It’ll be good to get out,” Minho agreed. “You’ll come, too?” he asked Onew.
Maybe Suho had heard from Teen Top. “Okay.”
Xiumin figured that Shinee wouldn’t be very happy to see him. When the Shinee members came into the dorm, he hung back. His members jumped all over Jonghyun and Minho, dragging them back to the bedrooms. Kai laughed happily and hugged Taemin, and the two of them disappeared together. Xiumin was left with D.O. and Suho, and Onew and Key.
“You’re never getting a haircut?” Suho asked, touching Onew’s long, shaggy hair.
“I need a trim,” he admitted, dragging his hand through it.
“Ricky likes it long,” Key said. D.O. nodded like that made sense.
“Have you heard from Teen Top?” Onew asked.
“Um.” Instead of saying no, Suho touched Onew’s arm. “Come to my room, we’ll talk in private.”
Did that mean yes? Had he been talking to C.A.P.? Had C.A.P. made a decision? Was he holding back and not telling them because it was bad news? That was probably for the best, because Sehun might murder them in their sleep.
D.O. turned his gaze on Key. “Do you want something to eat? I can get you something to drink. Or, there’s sex.”
“What, with you?” Key asked.
D.O. shook his head.
“Then get me a drink, I don’t care what it is.”
D.O. nodded and walked away.
Key looked at Xiumin.
An actual chill froze Xiumin’s spine. It wasn’t going to be Sehun who murdered him in his sleep.
“So. Hyung.” Key’s smile did not meet his eyes. “How’s it going?”
Xiumin swallowed. “Look, I - - I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I-”
“But it did, didn’t it?” Key asked, advancing. “It did.”
“I’m sorry.” It was impossible not to back up. Key was his dongsaeng, and had called him “hyung,” and was speaking respectfully, but there was no question about who was really on top, here. “I’m really, really sorry. I’ll be more careful from now on.”
“You can go ahead and fuck up your own life,” Key said. Xiumin was still backing away from him, but he kept coming, advancing, like a slow-motion chase scene. “You can even go ahead and fuck up all of EXO. Just ruin it, destroy the whole team, SM’s fantastic money-maker, burn it all down.” He was smiling, gesturing hypnotically, his fingers flickering through the air as he demonstrated EXO’s destruction. “I don’t care.” There was something particularly brutal about his careless dismissal of the hoobaes he’d been so close with, that made Xiumin take him more seriously than ever. Then his smile turned sharp, toothy, and he was breathing in Xiumin’s face. “But you fucked up my life this time.”
Xiumin backed into the side of a chair. Reaching behind himself, he held onto it for balance. Key’s expression looked flat and cold and dead one second, and then electric with fury the next. When Key’s fingers tapped and fluttered up the side of his neck, he shivered and wondered if he’d even be the first person Key had killed. “I’m sor-”
Key’s thumb smoothed over his lips, shushing him. “No, hyung, no.” Key’s voice was gentle, hushed. “No. Your apology is an insult to me. If you apologize to me, if you explain yourself, if you make a lot of promises about how it will never happen again, do you know what’s going to happen?”
Wide-eyed, silenced, he shook his head the tiniest bit, barely moving, barely breathing, staring up into Key’s pretty, malicious face.
“All I’m going to hear is a lot of useless, meaningless noise from someone who built a wall between me and Nam Woohyun. And I’m going to think about how easy it was for you to do that. How you were having fun, enjoying yourself, getting your dick stroked, never once thinking about how every time you came in some worthless nobody’s mouth, you were putting another brick in that wall. So I don’t want to hear it.”
He swallowed again, keeping his mouth shut.
Cupping his jaw in one hand, Key tilted his face farther up. He could feel Key’s breath on his skin. “What you should do instead, hyung, what I really think that you should do, is pray. Pray that I get back over that wall. Because if I don’t.” Key smiled, and it lit up his eyes this time with fierce, maniacal joy. “I’m coming for you.”
Xiumin saw his own doom in the gleam of Key’s eyes.
Letting go, Key stepped back. “Oh,” he said, and took a glass from D.O.’s hand. “Thanks.”
Xiumin was still too scared to breathe, much less move. He hadn’t realized that D.O. was there. Standing stock still, hand still outstretched offering the glass, D.O. stared at Key.
“You should apologize to Onew hyung, though,” Key advised. “He’s really upset about Ricky.” He took a sip, and then he threw the rest of the drink in D.O.’s face. “Do a better job of keeping your members in check.” He dropped the glass to the floor like he didn’t care whether it broke or not, and then he walked away.
In the distance, Baekhyun moaned and Chen laughed.
Xiumin blinked, breathing again. “Oh, shit,” he said, reaching a futile hand toward D.O. “Sorry about that.”
D.O. finally moved, pulling the hem of his shirt up to wipe at his face.
“I’m sorry,” Xiumin said again. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” D.O. looked disoriented for a second, and then he wiped at his face again.
“Take that off. What is that, water?”
“Sprite,” D.O. said. He pulled off his shirt and then gave Xiumin a serious look. “I think that from now on, you should be really, really good to Woohyun hyung.”
“Yeah.” He wiped Sprite from D.O.’s sideburns. “Yeah, I think that I should.”
L.Joe tried to keep doing the things that Sehun usually told him to do. He worked out. He cleaned the kitchen. He did the laundry. He made C.A.P.’s bed. He tried to stay busy. He hoped that if he kept his body moving, kept focusing on tasks and chores, he could keep his mind quiet. Keep his anxiety, his need, his desperation, down to a low buzz in the back of his brain instead of a clawing roar.
It didn’t work that well, but he told himself that it did, anyway. He told himself to look at the clean kitchen with a sense of satisfaction, told himself to take photos of the clean piles of laundry to document his effort for Sehun, told himself that thirty days was a manageable amount of time.
But he really missed Sehun. His body had needs. And it wasn’t only physical. There was something deep inside his mind. He told himself that it wasn’t a sickness, but those days, it felt like one. It felt like a ravaging fever taking over his brain. He felt rabid, he felt out of control, and he felt incredibly, incredibly vulnerable.
He knew what he needed, and he knew where to get it. But he was too ashamed, deeply, profoundly ashamed, to ask for it. Chunji tried to approach him about it, and in his vulnerability, in his mortification, his only thought was to protect himself. He lashed out like a wounded animal and he tried to punch Chunji right in the mouth.
His fantasies grew dark and obscene. He couldn’t sleep. He couldn’t sit still. He paced the dorm for hours. He tried to leave the dorm to walk around outside, but his own sexual compulsion terrified him. He was only a few feet from his own front door before fantasies - - plans - - about dark alleys and strangers and being brutally victimized took over his mind, and he was so desperately aroused that he turned and ran back into the dorm, not trusting himself to be alone. He was losing himself to his own need, and he felt helpless to do anything to stop it.
Finally, he was in the bathroom one day, scrubbing the floor, going over every square of tile, when Chunji came in. The way Chunji stood over him, behind him, made him feel wild with need, and he whimpered, fighting the urge to touch himself, forcing himself to keep scrubbing, to keep his head down, unable to help the way his hips jerked, popping his ass toward Chunji, begging to be taken.
“We gotta to do something,” Chunji said. “What do you want? You want me to order you to clean the maknaes’ room? You want me to spank you raw? You want me to tie you to the bed so the members can take turns on you, what?”
Yes. Yes, yes, he wanted all of those things. That was what was wrong. “Oh Sehun, I want Oh Sehun.”
“You can’t have Sehun, you know that.”
“L.Joe! You can’t have him, either. I can give you almonds, do you want almonds?”
“You’re so freaking annoying. I’m going to start spanking you just because I fucking feel like it.”
His cock twitched desperately, and he squeezed his eyes shut, biting down on his lip to keep from begging for it.
“Look, I know that your precious Oh Sehun is the only one who owns you and the only one who can do it right. But you can’t stay like this. Does he like it when you’re like this? Is this what he wants, for you to be a goddamned mess all of the time? So freaking cooperate for once, for his sake. Pretend he’s watching or something, pretend you’re doing it to get him off. He likes watching us together, anyway, it would totally do it for him if he saw me on top of you.”
“Not like this.” Sehun was the only one. He only had one owner, and Sehun was very protective of him. Sehun hated the thought of him under some other dom’s control.
“You just asked for like three other guys. Why can half of Infinite do it and I can’t?”
Because he had to work with Chunji. Because he had to live with Chunji. Because they were doms already, and hyungs, and used to doing those things anyway. Because he cared what Chunji thought of him, and how Chunji saw him, more than he worried about Sunggyu. He couldn’t get off on Chunji tormenting him, and then face Chunji the next day.
“You’re useless when you’re like this. What if we make it a game? We’ll play a game. You, me, and the maknae, to make it interesting. Whoever loses gets spanked. Whoever loses gets plowed. Whoever loses can’t say no.”
A game. If he lost, fair and square, then they’d do whatever they wanted to him.
“Come on, it’ll be great. If the maknae loses, we get to do shit to him.”
“What.” He licked his lips, tugging at his shorts to make room for his aching hard-on. “What if you lose?”
“Then you can do shit to me, I don’t care.”
“In our room. With the door closed.” He couldn’t let the other members see him like that.
“Okay. Get up, I’ll get the maknae.”
This was the best game Changjo had ever played. The point was the punishment, not the competition itself, so they did simple shit like rock, paper, scissors, just to get to the end. He lost a couple of times on purpose, at first, like Chunji had told him to, so it wouldn’t be so obvious that this was really all about L.Joe. The first time he lost, he gave them both head. The second time, Chunji put clips on his nipples. Chunji sucked on them to get them all pointy and hard and sensitive first, which he loved, but the clips hurt, and he rushed through the next game so he could take them off.
The next punishment was spanking. Wincing, Changjo took the clips off and rubbed his sore nipples while L.Joe hesitantly moved against the wall. “Not too hard,” L.Joe said nervously, shifting around uncertainly.
“Five hits apiece,” Chunji said, and yanked L.Joe’s pants down, baring his ass.
L.Joe made a shocked sound and clutched at himself, trying to cover his ass, his groin.
“Hands on the wall,” Chunji said, grabbing L.Joe’s right hand and pinning it to the wall. “Okay, maknae, you go first.”
“What, no,” L.Joe said, but Chunji looked right at Changjo and nodded.
Okay. He’d smacked L.Joe’s ass plenty of times, but really doing it, like this, sexually, it had always been off-limits. Rubbing his hands together, he stared at L.Joe’s pert little ass. God, he couldn’t wait to get his cock in there. Moaning, “No, no,” L.Joe was squirming, making a moving target.
Stepping forward, he brought his hand back, and then he swung forward. The smacking sound was so loud, it surprised him. L.Joe yelped. He didn’t swing as hard the next two times, but then he started to get into it, and he wanted to make L.Joe really feel it, wanted to make L.Joe’s ass bounce, so he made sure the last two stung.
“No, no,” L.Joe was saying, trying to pull away from Chunji, reaching back and cupping his free hand over his ass.
“Shut up and calm down, take it, it’s your punishment,” Chunji said. “Get on all fours, what are you so upset about, it’s five little swats.” He shoved L.Joe down.
Moaning, “Don’t, don’t,” and rubbing himself - - god, he was fully erect, he was even harder than Changjo was - - L.Joe moved onto his knees.
“Good, stay there.” Chunji got down behind him and spanked him hard. Each blow landed with a swift crack! and made L.Joe’s whole body twitch. By the last one, his ass was red, and he was arching his back, moaning, fondling himself urgently. “Okay, rock, paper, scissors,” Chunji said, getting up like nothing was going on. “Whoever loses gets spit-roasted.”
L.Joe didn’t even bother to get up. He stayed down there, on his knees, and as soon as he lost, he was pulling down Changjo’s pants, whimpering excitedly.
“No, no,” L.Joe moaned, as Changjo thrust inside him again. He was on his back on the floor, covered in cum - - his, Changjo’s, Chunji’s, all over his body, all over his face, they’d smeared it all over his face. They’d degraded him, humiliated him, used him crudely for their own pleasure, and now they were in him again, fucking him, driving into him, ignoring his protests.
“God, shut up for once,” Chunji said, and shoved a pair of underpants into his face, forcing it between his lips. Tossing his head, groaning, he tried to fight it, but Chunji stuffed the cotton into his mouth. Choking, he coughed, and Chunji said, “Good, that’ll keep you quiet.” It was the maknae’s underwear, pale blue, and it smelled like Changjo, tasted like Changjo, delicious and musky. Groaning, coughing, he worked a wad of cotton between his teeth.
Hiking his hips up higher, Changjo thrust deeper into him. He couldn’t stand letting the maknae see him like this, and he whimpered, closing his eyes, turning his face away. They’d tied his wrists behind his back, and his shoulders ached, his arms burning. He focused on that pain, on the soreness of his nipples, not wanting to acknowledge the relentless rise of pleasure, not wanting to admit to how intensely aroused he was.
But his body wouldn’t let him forget it, and Chunji wouldn’t, either. Chunji slapped his erection, and he gasped, involuntarily jerking. “I don’t think that I’m going to want to play this game again,” Chunji said, plucking carelessly at L.Joe’s nipples, twisting them cruelly. Crying out, L.Joe tried to roll away, but with Changjo gripping his hips and thrusting so deep inside him, he couldn’t get anywhere.
“Why, you don’t like it?” Changjo asked, only panting slightly.
“It’s boring.” Chunji swung a leg over and knelt astride L.Joe, facing Changjo. “Wouldn’t you rather be fucking me?”
L.Joe’s vision was full of Chunji now. Chunji’s long, smooth back and firm, little ass. The subtle sway of his balls as his hips shifted. Changjo was kissing him, groaning, and L.Joe watched the maknae’s hand slide up Chunji’s back. Grunting rhythmically, driving into L.Joe to that same rhythm, Changjo wrapped a muscular arm around him, pulling him closer.
Chunji undulated, his laughter breathless. “Yeah, you want it.”
“Need it,” Changjo panted, leaning forward, tipping Chunji back. He was fucking L.Joe harder now, his thrusts more and more forceful, his energy picking up. Every thrust was another hit of pleasure, another jolt of bliss, and L.Joe squirmed, helpless, unable to prevent it or encourage it or respond in any way but desperate, muffled moans.
They were making out, kissing hungrily right on top of him. Clinging to Changjo, Chunji moaned, making sexy, intoxicating sounds of drawn-out pleasure. Changjo’s thrusts were speeding up, and L.Joe struggled, trying to work his hands free. It was awful, humiliating; they were ignoring him, like he wasn’t even there, like he was just some unimportant, inhuman thing Changjo was using to get off. Changjo was pumping into him and lusting after Chunji. He’d never been fucked and ignored at the same time, like he was only there to serve this function and he was still worthless, anyway. As much as their rude dismissal of him shamed him, it turned him on, too, and he groaned as loudly as he could, to prove that he was still there, to make it even more pointed that they didn’t give a shit about him.
“God, you turn me on,” Changjo moaned, burying his face in Chunji’s neck, covering Chunji’s skin in hungry kisses.
“Yeah, oh, are you hard?” Chunji panted, grinding against him.
“Fuck, yes, oh, you’ve got me hard as a rock right now,” Changjo groaned, his erection filling L.Joe in forceful thrusts. “Oh, you’re so sexy, hyung, you’re so good-looking.”
“Mmm, maknae.” Chunji’s arms were wrapped around Changjo, his back inches from L.Joe’s chest, the muscles in Changjo’s arm taut from holding him up. They kissed like they were completely absorbed in each other, like no one else was in the whole dorm. Changjo’s hips were in relentless motion, rocking, forcing pleasure on L.Joe in hot bursts.
“I need you,” Changjo panted. “God, hyung, please.”
Changjo was inside L.Joe, fucking L.Joe, begging for someone else. Humiliated, L.Joe burned, tormented by shame. He was being used, he was worthless, and his throbbing cock was begging for release. He shook his head from side to side, groaning desperately, chewing on the maknae’s underwear, trying to force it from his mouth. His vision was filled by pretty, sexy Chunji, practically on him, soft, taut skin and broad, square shoulders dipping closer. He wanted to raise his head and nuzzle into Chunji’s soft hair, but he wasn’t even close to good enough to join in, and that was cruelly obvious.
One arm locked around Changjo’s muscular shoulders, Chunji put one hand back, fumbling over L.Joe’s erection. The unexpected touch took L.Joe by surprise, reminding him of how helpless he was, his arms bound, his body penetrated, none of this under his control. Overwhelmed by pleasure and excitement and exquisite agony, he came, his cock responding eagerly to Chunji’s careless groping. Thrilled, ashamed, he whimpered desperately. Chunji tugged carelessly on his erection, still fondling it, using no rhythm, treating him crudely. With Chunji working his cock and Changjo thrusting vigorously into him, he soon came again, squirting messily, reveling in his degradation.
“Messy slut,” Chunji said, wiping his hand on L.Joe’s thigh, smearing even more cum onto L.Joe’s skin. “Mmm, come on, maknae.” He made soft, urgent sounds, coaxing, enticing moans. “Come for me, give it up, show me what that gorgeous cock can do.”
“Unnh, oh, fuck,” Changjo groaned, pounding into L.Joe with powerful thrusts. “Unh, Chunji hyung, shit.” His fingers dug hard into L.Joe’s hip, bruising, as he came, grunting.
“Yeah, let’s see that sloppy cream,” Chunji urged, and Changjo popped out of L.Joe, dripping cum all over L.Joe’s thigh, dribbling onto his pubes. Messy and sore, L.Joe whimpered. Now that he’d come, and he was no longer caught up in the joys of being fucked, he felt horribly exposed, felt every bit of his vulnerability. Miserable, ashamed, he mewled pitifully, trying to close his legs.
Laughing as Changjo relaxed, Chunji forced L.Joe’s thighs apart again, dragging his knees up. “God, you look like the aftermath of a weeklong orgy. You should see your hole, you have more cum oozing out of you than Niel swallows in a year.”
“Mmm, we do pretty good work,” Changjo said, eyeing his dripping hole with a scandalously appreciative smile.
Burning hot with shame, L.Joe tried to kick free, tried to roll away.
“You were fantastic,” Chunji murmured, sensual and approving. He kissed Changjo lovingly, fingers skimming across Changjo’s firm pecs. “Go wash up and relax, you earned it.”
Changjo squeezed Chunji’s ass, making it look mouthwateringly tender, and kissed him again. “Thanks for the fun.”
“Any time,” Chunji murmured, and L.Joe could hear his smirk.
Changjo got up and walked out without even glancing at L.Joe.
Trying to shout, “Untie me, you fucker, untie me!” through his gag, L.Joe kicked out furiously. Then Chunji lazily turned around, and Chunji’s gaze skimmed over him, and the amusement in Chunji’s eyes was excruciating. Immediately submissive, whimpering, L.Joe squeezed his own eyes shut, wishing himself away, far away, anywhere else but there.
“Messy slut,” Chunji said again, and he sounded fond, and L.Joe whimpered, feeling disgusting and soiled and ruined. Chunji tugged the maknae’s underwear out of his mouth, and he pressed his lips together, desperately trying to choke back his own pitiful moans. “Okay, roll over,” Chunji said gently, maneuvering him onto his side. It seemed to take forever, panic fluttering in his chest, but soon Chunji had his arms unbound. Being tied like that had been horrible, but now that he was free, he didn’t know what to do. It was easier being helpless; as soon as he had the ability to speak and move, he felt completely lost. What could he possibly say? Where could he possibly go? They’d just seen him at his absolute worst, used and exploited and gleeful about it. He couldn’t pretend to be human and normal again after that.
“Your arms probably hurt,” Chunji said, rubbing his shoulder. The touch alarmed him, and he tensed up, waiting for Chunji to say something else, hurt him somehow. But Chunji didn’t say anything at all, just massaged his arm, stroked his wrist. The kindness seemed impossible, and he was so confused, he started crying. Sniffling, horrified, he wept, choking on painful sobs, tears running down his face. The night came back to him in damning flashes, taunting him, making him flinch away from the scandalous truth: the two of them drilling him at both ends, spanking him, holding him still for each other and forcing their cocks down his throat, ignoring his protests, taunting him when he begged for more, tying him up, hurting him, abusing him, treating him like trash. His own maknae. Overwhelmed, he cried and cried until nothing was left.
And Chunji stayed with him, and rubbed his arms, and stroked his back while he wept.
Eventually, drained, he wanted to curl up and never do anything again. “Come on, come on,” Chunji said, still being gentle with him, being kind to him. When Chunji dragged him to his feet, he went, because he didn’t have it in him to refuse. Arm around him, Chunji walked him to the bathroom. They showered together. Or, he tried to shower, tried to go through the motions, but he felt too shaky, too exhausted. Chunji washed him, frank and familiar, and he couldn’t argue that Chunji didn’t have the right to his body.
They went back to their room, and they got into bed together. He felt vulnerable and weak, and he felt grateful to Chunji, and he snuggled as close as he could, the two of them wrapping around each other. “You okay?” Chunji asked, stroking his hair.
“Yeah.” He’d be okay in the morning, anyway. He wanted to ask how Chunji suddenly knew about aftercare, but he thought that he was better off not knowing. Sehun had said something? Woohyun? No, he didn’t want to know.
“I love you, you know.”
“Why do you have to… I don’t… The maknae,” he mumbled, mortified.
“Because he’s built like that,” Chunji said. “That gorgeous body and that luscious cock? It does things for you. Hell, it does things for me. And, come on, it’s more humiliating when it’s your own maknae, that’s fucked up. Makes it worse for you. Or, makes it better for you. Whatever, you know what I mean.”
“God, I hate you,” he moaned. He was grateful to be so well understood, and he hated being so easily read, so obvious.
Chunji kissed his cheek. “Go to sleep, you have to be exhausted.”
They slept twined around each other. In the morning, they made love, intimate and romantic, reconnecting, until L.Joe felt electric with bliss and drunk on pretty, sexy Chunji.
Then they avoided each other completely for the rest of the day, until things were back to normal.
“Hmm?” Suho hated shaving every day. It was too annoying. He wished that he could grow a beard and forget about it.
“Hyung,” Chen repeated.
“Dongsaeng-ah, what?” he asked, exasperated, looking away from the bathroom mirror.
“We’re seeing Infinite tomorrow.”
“What? No, we’re not.” He wished that they were. He wished it desperately. Just hearing Chen say the words had made his heart kick. Swallowing down his emotions, his yearning and his pain and his desire, he looked down, unplugging his razor.
“They’re going to be at the festival. They’re performing right before us.”
“What?” He stared at Chen, stunned and vulnerable. That couldn’t be true. “Tomorrow?”
Chen nodded, smiling eagerly, looking worried and hopeful. “They’ll be there.”
“We - - we can’t talk to them.”
“I know,” Chen said, his eagerness dimming right in front of Suho’s eyes. “I know. But at least we can look, right? We can greet them when we walk past, I mean, it’ll be too strange if we don’t, won’t it? Everyone knows that we’re all friends.”
He licked his lips. Thinking about it, he rubbed his smooth chin. “We can’t talk to them,” he said again. “But we have to greet our sunbaes, if we see them.” He was desperate to see Sunggyu again. And on top of everything else, he couldn’t have rumors that his members were rude. “They’ll really be there?”
Chen nodded again, his smile back. “Don’t laugh at me if I spend too long in the stylist’s chair. I want to make a good impression.”
Things backstage were tense. With the scandal still so fresh, everybody was on his best behavior. Idols shied away from each other, speaking nervously to staff, sticking close to their own members. The rookies looked terrified. Even the relatively more seasoned groups were careful; VIXX greeted Infinite dutifully, and then N herded them on down the hallway like enemy spies were watching and waiting to pounce.
Sunggyu had instructed his members strictly. They kept to themselves, relaxing around the dressing room so that any staff members going in and out would see that everything was comfortable, but not setting foot outside unless they had to. They performed well; his kids always shone under pressure.
He followed L offstage, and he saw EXO standing there, ready to go on next. Baekhyun looked nervous, and Xiumin looked sick.
For a split second, Suho looked devastated. Then he smiled smoothly, like everything was going well and nothing could ever be wrong, and bowed politely. “Our sunbaes always do so well. Infinite fighting!”
He was handsome and charming and flawless. Sunggyu smiled back. “EXO fighting!”
They had on their public faces, the ones they wore for TV. They couldn’t do anything here, couldn’t say anything that meant anything. Everyone had to play it safe; getting close to EXO was a huge risk while Westonic still might expose Xiumin. Sunggyu couldn’t do the things he needed to do: kiss Suho, yell at him, reassure him, give him advice, yell at him some more, make love to him up against the speakers.
Instead, Sunggyu put an arm around L and guided him forward, walking him past Suho and out into the hallway.
He was taking off his mic when Woohyun hugged him. Returning the hug, he patted Woohyun’s back. “What’s this for?”
Woohyun’s cheek pressed to his, and then Woohyun’s arms wrapped around him more snugly. He had things to do, but he could take time to hug this dongsaeng, it was okay. It felt good. It was nice, it settled some of the things inside of him that seeing Young Money had riled up. He watched his members mill around. Then Woohyun said, “Love you,” and pulled back.
He finished taking off his mic. “I like you, too, sometimes.”
Woohyun flashed him a smile. “You’d better.”
Hoya had barely looked at him. A quick flick of the eyes, and that was it. Hoya had almost looked right past him, like he wasn’t even there.
It was awful. Chen couldn’t get himself together afterward. Onstage, he got lost in the choreography. At least he could trust his voice; his vocals made it seem like nothing was wrong. But everything was wrong. Hoya had barely looked at him. He kept going over it again in his mind, replaying it, the way Hoya had barely glanced over, had walked right by him.
In the dressing room, both Suho and Lay scolded him for messing up. He kept his head down and took it. He just wanted to go back to the dorm. He’d fucked up the performance and he was surrounded by strangers and he just wanted to get away from all of this and cry on somebody’s shoulder.
“Hey,” a familiar voice said, an unmistakable voice, Hoya’s voice. Feeling a shock go through him, Chen whirled around, staring.
Hoya was in the doorway, talking to Kai. “Is this yours?”
“Uh, no,” Kai said.
“I saw it in the hallway,” Hoya explained. He looked gorgeous. Being this close to him made Chen’s heart beat painfully hard. It was really Hoya, his easy movements, his skeptical eyebrows. “I figured, something this nice, it must belong to EXO.” He showed D.O. something in his hand. “Is it yours?”
“No,” D.O. said. He gave Hoya a very long look. “Maybe it belongs to Chen hyung.”
Chen’s heart convulsed.
“Oh?” Innocently, Hoya looked around, then took a step towards Chen. “Is it yours?”
All of a sudden, his reliable voice didn’t work at all. His throat tightening up, he walked over to Hoya. He didn’t know if he was standing way too close or awkwardly far away; distances didn’t make sense anymore. Then Hoya smiled at him, and Hoya was smiling at him, and he laughed, a rusty, exhilarated, super-loud laugh bursting right out of him. Oh, god, Hoya was smiling at him. Everything was okay. “Hi.”
“I found this in the hallway,” Hoya said. “Is it yours?”
He hadn’t lost anything. Tearing his gaze away from Hoya’s eyes, he glanced down. There was a ring in the palm of Hoya’s hand, a gold ring with notches cut out of it. It was really classy and stylish. He’d never seen it before. It probably belonged to Dongwoo, and Hoya was just using it for an excuse to talk to him. “No, not mine.” Immediately, his gaze swung back up to Hoya’s eyes, and he smiled, giddy. Hoya had come up with an excuse to see him. Hoya had come to him and was smiling at him. Would it be going too far if he mentioned how handsome Hoya looked today? Would it be going too far if he planted a kiss on Hoya’s sexy, sensual mouth?
Hoya chuckled and gave him an amused, provocative, heart-stealing smile. “Are you sure?”
That smile told him everything. “Oh!” He laughed again, rubbing his hands on his thighs so that he wouldn’t reach for Hoya. “I think that I dropped it earlier, I must have, in the hallway. Thank you for finding it. Really,” he said, so happy and relieved and in love that he felt dizzy. “Thank you.”
Hoya handed it to him, and when Hoya’s fingertips stroked over his palm, he closed his hand, holding Hoya’s hand for a second, just a second. “You’re welcome.” Hoya took a controlled step back, gaze locked onto his. “Stay healthy.”
Hoya had found a way to come to him. To give him something tangible to hold onto while they had to be apart. He tried to say “I love you” and “I miss you” and “you mean everything to me” with his eyes. With his mouth, all he could say was, “Infinite fighting.”
Hoya turned away. Overjoyed by his visit, completely in love with him, yearning for him already, Chen watched him go. Chanyeol was in his way, staring at him, staring at Chen, being way too obvious. The clear path was to go around Chanyeol on the right, but Hoya went left, instead. And then he bumped into Suho. It was only a light bump, a brush of contact, but struck Chen as odd; he’d never looked so clumsy before, so awkward and flat-footed. “Oh,” he said, putting a steadying hand on Suho’s shoulder. “Sorry, Money.” Then he walked out of the room.
Chen squeezed the ring in his hand until he felt its hardness dig into his palm. Then, treasuring it, he slid it on. It looked fantastic.
He was so happy about Hoya, he felt great about everything. Hoya loved him. Hoya had come to him. That smile! No one had ever been so sexy, god, no one in the world. As soon as he got in the van and the door closed, he held his hand out, staring at it, admiring his new ring. It was a gift from his boyfriend. From his hot, romantic, amazing boyfriend.
“Money,” Suho said. “He called me Money. No, I’m reading too much into it. But he called me Money. No, it’s probably just habit. Did he bump into me on purpose?”
“Are you okay?” Baekhyun asked. “Are you glitching or something?”
“I’m freaking out,” Suho said. “No, I’m okay. I’m reading too much into it.”
But suddenly it made a lot more sense. “He bumped into you on purpose,” Chen said, turning in his seat. “He did, I saw it.”
“That’s rude,” Baekhyun said.
“No, but he didn’t brush past Suho hyung the way you do when you want to be rude,” Chen said. “If you bump into somebody on purpose to make a point, it’s rougher than that. It was really light.”
“He squeezed my shoulder,” Suho said. “The way you do when you’re showing support, when you’re reassuring somebody, like, ‘you’ve got this,’ or, ‘I’ve got you,’ that kind of touch.”
“Then he called you that on purpose,” Chen said, even more excited now. It was a good sign! “Like an inside joke, to let you know that you’re still friends.”
“I guess,” Baekhyun said.
Sehun suddenly came alive in the next seat, turning around, his expression focused. “If he bumped into you to be rude, he would’ve said ‘Money’ in a dismissive tone, like he was mocking you for it. Or he would’ve called you ‘Suho’ or even ‘Joonmyun’ or something, to prove you weren’t close. Calling you by your nickname but doing it in a normal tone, it’s either an accident or a message. Everything’s okay, you’re still close.”
“It wasn’t an accident,” Chen said. He was sure of that.
“Then does that mean - - but it’s all up to Sunggyu hyung, not Hoya,” Suho said. “Hoya can like us as much as he wants, it doesn’t mean anything.”
It meant everything to Chen.
“Did Hoya hyung do it all behind Sunggyu hyung’s back?” Sehun asked. “That’s a huge risk, and Hoya hyung’s not like that.”
“What, you think Sunggyu hyung sent him?” Baekhyun asked.
“No, but I think he got permission,” Sehun said.
“Sunggyu hyung wouldn’t give permission,” Suho said. “Not now.”
“But if he did have permission, then Sunggyu hyung’s willing to let the members take small risks,” Sehun said. Chen’s mind whirled; there were too many possibilities, too many hopeful signs. “He’s looking forward to our teams getting back together.”
“But Sunggyu hyung wouldn’t give permission,” Suho argued.
But. What if he had?
“How close are Sunggyu hyung and C.A.P. hyung?” Sehun demanded. “Would it make a difference to Teen Top if Infinite’s still willing to see us?”
“It might,” Baekhyun said. “I think it might. They’ve known each other for a long time. If they’re involved with each other, and one of them is involved with us, then the other one might as well see us too, right? We’re all connected.”
“But doesn’t that mean,” Suho said, “that if we poison one of them, we’ll end up poisoning the other, too, by association? So they’re better off if they both break away from us and just see each other. It’s safer that way, and they’ll still have someone to be close to.”
“But L.Joe sunbae won’t have me,” Sehun said, and his voice was so tense he sounded ferocious.
“But he’ll have Woohyun hyung,” Baekhyun said. He sounded anxious, like he didn’t want to be saying it but he couldn’t keep it from coming out. “And Sunggyu hyung. They can do those things. They’ve even done it before, haven’t they, and L.Joe liked it.”
Sehun was out of his seat and on Baekhyun before Chen even saw it coming. It took both Chen and Suho to drag him off.
“Oh.” A moan escaped Sungjong as his back met the practice room wall. Hoya was already pushing his pants down, baring his cock, and he moaned again, trying to keep up with Hoya’s intense, devouring kisses. Hoya wasn’t usually so aggressive like this, and, “Ohh-hhh,” he liked it.
Hoya slid down onto his knees. His hand and his tongue worked together over Sungjong’s cock, stroking, gliding, and Sungjong put a hand in his hair, loving this attention, needing so much more of it. “Unnh, oh, hyung.” Hoya turned on the suction, lips sliding up and down his shaft, so rhythmic, so demanding, “Ouhh-hhh-hhhnngh, oh, oh.” Sungjong undulated against the wall, hips jutting forward, cock aching. “Ooohhhh.”
While Hoya sucked steadily, quickly, his fingers caressed Sungjong, sliding back, nudging right against Sungjong’s asshole. Sungjong groaned again, squirming, hips bucking, and he stroked it again, teasing it, giving Sungjong just a hint of penetration.
Too turned on to take it, Sungjong writhed, trying to screw himself against Hoya’s finger, thrusting into Hoya’s hot mouth. All of it felt incredible, “Oh, oh, ooouuuhhh,” Hoya was so into it, so good at it, touching him just right, “oooh, uunnh,” sucking him so hard, mouth so demanding, so, so, “oh, oh, hyung!” Crying out, he came, ecstasy taking off like a rocket. The shock of his climax made him gasp, and he gripped Hoya’s hair, needing something to hold onto, about to tip right over. “Oh, oh.”
“Nice,” Dongwoo said.
Laughing shakily, Sungjong relaxed his hands, slumping back against the wall.
Hoya got up, wiping his hand over his mouth. “Ooohh, what’s this?” Dongwoo asked, cupping a hand over Hoya’s hard-on.
With a quick laugh, Hoya danced back, blushing. “Don’t worry about that.”
“But it looks so tasty,” Dongwoo said, making grabby hands. “I can’t have any?”
“We’re practicing,” Hoya said.
“We’re not,” Sungjong said, tucking himself away. “L hyung and Sunggyu hyung aren’t even here yet, we have time.”
Hoya licked his lips, then arched his back, undulating a little, lithe and restless. It was the way he moved when he wanted sex, and as soon as he did it, Dongwoo and Woohyun and Sungyeol all moved in, closing around him. “Maybe later,” he said, running his hand over his chest, licking his lips again. “At the dorm.”
Sunggyu rubbed the back of L’s neck, peering into his face. “Okay?”
Looking miserable, avoiding his eyes, L nodded.
This kid. Always going off in his own mind somewhere, making things worse than they really were. “It’s only thirty days,” Sunggyu said. “You can’t handle thirty days? It’s already halfway over.”
He swallowed and finally met Sunggyu’s eyes. “What if it’s never over?” His voice cracked. “What if - - Suho hyung looked right past me. He looked at me like I was nothing to him. He looked at me like I was a stranger, nobody, an idol whose group he’d never even heard of.”
“Because we were in public,” Sunggyu said, squeezing a little to get the words to sink in. “Public faces. Of all people, you don’t understand public faces?”
“What if it’s always like that from now on? What if - - if Changjo looks at me like that, I think I’ll-”
“You won’t do anything,” Sunggyu said firmly. “You’re not a confused trainee, you’re Infinite’s L, you know how this works. You know how it goes. When things are wrong in private, they stay private. Last month, things were better, so you could go out with Young Money and hold hands at the movies and giggle together like fools. This month, things aren’t so good. Next month, I don’t know about next month.” L’s gaze went wounded and distant, and he squeezed again, needing to hold L’s attention. “What Westonic does, and what management does, doesn’t change how Money feels. It doesn’t change how that maknae feels, either. The people who love you, love you. Money’s a leader, and a leader’s loyalty doesn’t change with the wind. It’s not here today and over there tomorrow and maybe he’ll care about you the next day, we’ll see. It’s constant. The face he puts on when cameras are around doesn’t mean anything. You know that better than anybody. If bad things happen and thirty days turns into half a year, then we’ll deal with it. But don’t think that how EXO’s Suho treats Infinite’s L has anything to do with how Money loves Myungsoo. Understand?”
His eyes watery, L nodded. “I understand.”
“Good.” He stroked L’s hair. “Good.” He decided not to say that he was one hundred percent more sure about Money’s commitment to L, than about Money’s commitment to him. It was an issue he didn’t want to get into. He preferred to worry about that inside his own head, not out loud. “And don’t worry about that maknae, either.” He couldn’t make promises yet, but he felt confident about Teen Top.
“Why?” L asked. “C.A.P. always puts Teen Top first. If that means fucking me over, trust me, he’ll do it.”
“Do you only look back and see the bad things, and only look ahead and see even worse things?” Sunggyu asked. “Who cares if C.A.P. always puts Teen Top first, what else do you expect? Do you think that I’m any different? If he doesn’t put the good of his members first, stay the hell away from him.” He was getting off-track now. He wiped away a few of L’s tears with his thumb. “I hate it when you cry. Here, I won’t make you any big promises, I won’t tell you that everything will be perfect from now on. But I’ll tell you what I know, what I’m sure of.” He waited until L’s gaze steadied. “Money loves you and he’s looking out for you. Changjo loves you and he’ll do anything for you. I love you, and I’m not going anywhere.”
Grabbing him, L pulled him into a tight hug. He heard a single, wet sob, and then L’s face pressed to his shoulder.
“Not going anywhere,” Sunggyu repeated, patting his back. “You cry too much, you need to cry less.”
“Then you need to make the world fucking suck less.”
He patted L’s back some more. While he hugged and waited, he thought about what to say to C.A.P. How to talk to Onew. What to do about Money. Beautiful, professional, skittish Young Money.
Finally, L pulled away from him. He wiped at L’s tears, and L looked embarrassed. “Okay?” he asked. “Can we go to practice now?”
L nodded. “Can I sleep with you tonight?”
“Okay.” He’d do what he could to make his dongsaeng feel better. “But then maybe we shouldn’t let practice run too long. I’m going to need energy, later.”
Onew needed to see Ricky.
He was having a lot of sex with his members. He was really horny and he wanted it all of the time, and he kept needing to be inside someone, kept closing his eyes and seeing Ricky. He was weirdly obsessed with cupcakes. He knew that it was weird, but he kept giving into it, anyway. He looked up bakeries on-line, scouring their menus, comparing ingredients, planning future purchases, calling to ask about special orders.
He needed to be good to Ricky. His lovely, lovely Ricky.
C.A.P. came through the front door lugging a box. He dropped it on the floor, grunting, and then nudged it towards the couch with one foot. “Next time you order something, you pick it up.”
“Me?” Ricky asked, since the only other person on the couch was Changjo, and C.A.P. was definitely looking at him. “I didn’t order anything. Where’d you get it?”
“Where do you think?” C.A.P. asked. “At the office.”
“Is it from Angel?” Changjo asked, hopping up and squatting beside it. “It’s not your birthday.”
“It doesn’t look like Angel.” Usually their gifts were decorated, or at least had a fan site logo on them. This was a plain, brown delivery box. Changjo started ripping the cardboard, and Ricky kicked him. “Maknae! It’s mine, not yours, get away.”
“Then open it,” Changjo said, landing on his ass.
Reaching out, he dragged the box closer. Changjo scooted near, and C.A.P. stood over them, watching.
Inside, there was a piece of paper on top. Changjo snatched it up; he decided to let that pass and started pulling things out of the box. There were all sorts of smaller boxes, of all dimensions. Everything was wrapped in thick, shiny, gold paper with black ribbons. “Is it my birthday?” he asked, baffled.
“Seriously, no,” Changjo said.
Then what was all of this? He started unwrapping. There was a bunch of stuff. Videogames, new ones he hadn’t played yet. Immediately, C.A.P. started snatching those up, and he made a mental note of their titles so that he’d know if one went missing. Stylish shirts from top designers. Pretty, flashy earrings. Snack food, all delicious. New shoes in exactly his size. “Did one of my fan sites just win a million dollars?” he asked, baffled. This was great, it was super great, he was really grateful and happy, but why?
“One guess,” Changjo said.
He stared at the stacks of presents around him, the pile of discarded paper. Everything was perfect for him, exactly what he liked, and expensive. It had to be Angel. But it wasn’t his birthday, or Teen Top’s anniversary, or anything like that. What else-
But Onew wouldn’t dare be caught buying all of this for him. Not now. Not in the middle of a scandal.
“Shawol,” he said, suddenly meeting Changjo’s eyes.
“Shawol,” Changjo said, grinning at him. “It doesn’t say Shawol,” he explained, handing over the letter. “But it calls you lovely and shiny, and it praises you a lot for being so good and respectful to your sunbaes.”
“Shiny,” he repeated. He read the letter, and then he looked over the mounds of gifts surrounding him. Onew had done this. Onew had gotten Shawol to do this. Even now, when everyone was trying desperately to lay low, Onew insisted on pampering him. He knew that Onew’s feelings for him were strong, but, wow. Wow. He never had to worry about this hyung at all. He laughed, amazed. “Onew hyung does too much! What’s he doing, getting them to give me all of this?”
“He’s spoiling you. That’s the point of having a hyung.” Changjo reached for a box of cookies.
He slapped Changjo’s hand away. “Maknae! No!” He moved the box out of Changjo’s reach. “Get Suho hyung to buy you snacks.”
For one flickering instant, Changjo looked wounded and painfully, achingly vulnerable. Then he recovered, bounding to his feet. “I will,” he said. “Wait a few more days, and I will.”
Ricky carried his presents to his room, and he saved the letter so that he could send a thank you note, because he definitely wanted to maintain a good relationship with Onew’s fans. Then he opened a bag of chips and shared them with Changjo, to make up for having said the wrong thing. Changjo waited a whole day to start stealing more snacks out of his hiding places, so he knew that there were no hard feelings.
Sungyeol tried not to talk too much about how long this no-EXO, no-Shinee, no-Teen Top drought was lasting. He tried not to mention those groups or their members. He didn’t discuss the thirty-day countdown. He didn’t bring up how much he fantasized about Niel, or how much he missed the way Baekhyun shivered against him when he was deep inside. He didn’t want to bother Sunggyu about it in the wrong way at the wrong moment and potentially influence Sunggyu’s ultimate decision about whether or not they’d ever get to go on MT again.
But he knew that, whether they talked about it or not, it was on everyone’s mind. He could tell by how quiet and distracted Hoya got, and by how intensely L brooded, and by the terrifying, dark look that crossed Woohyun’s face when Sungjong made the mistake of mentioning Key in a completely different context.
But L didn’t just brood. He also clung. He crawled all over Sungjong, and he burrowed into everyone else’s bed, and he wanted to be next to someone, skin-on-skin close, cuddling and kissing and deep-deep fucking, all of the time. Meanwhile, Woohyun was constantly prowling around, starting something, flirting and seducing, pulling someone behind closed doors. Sunggyu, Dongwoo, all of Sungyeol’s members seemed to think that if they couldn’t have sex outside of the dorm, they were going to spend every second they had inside the dorm getting laid. Sungyeol’s days and nights were a constant orgy, with, “That’s the magic,” and “I love you, I love you,” and, “God, hyung, yes,” on looping repeat.
He’d spent a lot of time over the past months enjoying a lot of fun and sexual variety. Screwing a lot of hoobaes and dongsaengs. Now, deprived of all that, he and his members were confined to just each other. And he had to admit, even after weeks of it, he had it pretty damned good.
It was only thirty days. Changjo knew how Suho felt about him. He wouldn’t be worried. He was a perceptive dongsaeng, he knew that this time was different from before. He’d sent that letter, hadn’t he? He understood how things were. They’d be together again soon, and Suho would make everything up to him.
Suho was worrying too much. He was dwelling on potential problems, when maybe things weren’t nearly so bad. Changjo had written to him to tell him that everything would be okay; how could he ignore that?
But what Changjo said didn’t dictate what C.A.P. would say.
And what about L? L knew how Suho felt about him, too; L was mature enough to understand that taking a short break didn’t change anything. L would understand that it was out of Suho’s control, and that as soon as things were okay again, as soon as the scandal died down, they’d be together again.
But L was so sensitive. And separated from Changjo, too. That was something else that Suho felt responsible for, that Changjo and L couldn’t be together. Infinite and Teen Top were only tied to Westonic through EXO.
What if L felt abandoned?
Suho had his own members to worry about. Xiumin, who was terrified of what Westonic might say. Sehun, who was being horrible. But not only the two of them; all of the members were affected. They were being kept away from their friends, and Suho couldn’t make a lot of reassurances about how soon things would be back to normal, because that might not be true. They’d been so happy with their friendships, so energized and well-behaved, so full of life and confidence, that he hated seeing them anxious and uncertain now. Chen was in love with Hoya. Lay was in paradise with Dongwoo. Who was going to scratch Chanyeol’s back and call him “oppa” now? Suho sure wasn’t going to volunteer, and Sehun was the last person in the world inclined to humor anyone sexually these days.
Suho told himself that as long as his members had each other, they could be okay without their other friends. If thirty days went on forever, they’d be all right. But his promises to L and Changjo haunted him. The image of L’s anguished face was never far from his mind. He worried about what Changjo might be up to, who would be there to guide Changjo in the right direction.
And then there was Sunggyu. Impossible, wonderful, contradictory Kim Sunggyu. He could force himself to face C.A.P. and push for reconciliation - - it wouldn’t be easy, but he’d do it. But he had no idea how he was ever going to face Sunggyu.
“I’m sorry that I jeopardized everything you ever worked for, sunbaenim, I’m sorry that EXO was careless and put you in this position after all of your years of sacrifice, but can you overlook it anyway?” He’d gotten through that conversation with Onew, and it had been agonizing. He was going to have to do it with C.A.P. and Sunggyu, but he’d be lucky if he got that far. He’d be lucky if they heard him out at all. He thought about their grim faces, thought about them refusing his calls and closing doors in his face, thought about how likely they were to shut him out to protect their members. And he thought about L and Changjo, and Woohyun and L.Joe, and Hoya and Ricky, and - - god, he felt sick, he felt doomed. It was the blind item all over again, only he didn’t know if he’d be given a second second chance.
“I’m bored,” Niel said, flopping down beside C.A.P. on the couch. “This is boring.” He looked around the room and flung a foot out, kicking Ricky on the floor. “You’re boring.”
“Talk to Chunji hyung, he’s the pretty, sparkly, shiny one,” Ricky said, not moving.
“I thought that you were the shiny one,” Niel said.
“No, that’s a different kind of shiny,” Ricky said.
C.A.P. was in a boneless sprawl. His head lolling, he looked over at Niel. “Looking for an adventure? Dig around under Changjo’s bed.”
“Hide Chunji hyung’s moisturizer,” Ricky advised.
C.A.P. chuckled. “That’ll liven things up.”
“We could hide L.Joe hyung’s collar,” Ricky suggested.
“Aw, don’t,” C.A.P. said. “Let’s do something to the maknae.”
“Good, okay,” Niel said, immediately in.
“I - - hold on,” C.A.P. said, digging his phone out of his pocket. “Yeah?” he asked, answering on speakerphone.
“Ya,” their manager said. “We need Changjo on ‘Big Time Talk.’ They’re filming on Monday at five and they want him to do choreography for things like ‘Rocking’ and ‘Ah-Ah.’”
“This Monday?” C.A.P. asked.
Surprised, wondering, Niel looked from the phone to C.A.P. to Ricky, who shared a puzzled look with him.
“Yeah. Tell him to get in the practice room and polish it up. They’re going to have other idols there, talking about choreography and footwork, and he’s going to have to teach it to them.”
Niel’s eyes widened. “Which other idols?” Ricky whispered. Needing to know the same thing, Niel pushed at C.A.P.’s leg and repeated, “Which other idols?”
C.A.P. waved them away. “Which other idols?”
“I don’t know, it’s an idol episode, they just said that they wanted Changjo to do it.”
“Okay,” C.A.P. said. “He’ll practice.”
Their manager hung up. “That’s a real show, though,” Niel said. “Real people watch that show.” It wasn’t an idol show, it was real TV that parents and everybody watched.
“Teaching other idols?” Ricky asked. “Which other idols? They’re going to hate it, they’re going to look bad on TV.”
“Maybe he could just do the easy parts,” Niel suggested. He tried to remember the easy parts. There had to be some.
“They want ‘Rocking’ and ‘Ah-Ah’ specifically?” Ricky asked. “Why?”
“Because they’re harder, I guess,” C.A.P. said.
Niel’s eyes widened. “Is someone setting up other idols to make them look bad? Is Changjo behind this? Is he trying to humiliate his enemies on TV?”
“Changjo doesn’t have enemies,” Ricky said, and burst into laughter.
Changjo didn’t need to practice, but he did, anyway. He went through the moves over and over again, and he did the choreography slowly, breaking the steps down. He practiced teaching Ricky, making sure that his explanations were clear.
He didn’t have his phone, and the Internet was frustrating. C.A.P. would only let him read, not post or send messages, so he had to rely on other people to bring up information, and he couldn’t find anyone saying anything. So he had no idea who would be at the filming, other than the fixed cast members, and there weren’t any idols on the fixed cast.
He wanted to know who had arranged this, and why. Maybe there was an Angel among the writers, who wanted to show him off. Maybe someone had just grabbed Teen Top from a list, or maybe their reputation for knife-life choreography was still strong. He wouldn’t know anything until he showed up for filming and got to ask questions. So he prepared his dances, and he trusted that, whatever came up, he could handle it.
L shrugged into his jacket. At the door, he looked over at the couch. Woohyun had emerged from Sunggyu’s room half an hour ago, and was still lounging around looking smug and satisfied. “Want to come with me?”
Woohyun shook his head.
“Onew hyung will be there.”
Woohyun sat up, gesturing him over. “C’mere.”
He went over, and Woohyun pulled on his arm, pulled on the front of his shirt, dragged him in and kissed him. A soft, tender kiss, at first, luring him in, until he was crawling onto Woohyun’s lap, and then a little nibbling, turning him on, Woohyun’s hand sliding under his shirt, and then a sensual, possessive bite. Groaning, he wanted to spend the next hour letting Woohyun do obscene, loving things to him. “When you come back,” Woohyun said, smiling at him, stroking his cheek, kissing him again, gently. “I’m going to make love to you until the sun comes up.”
He smiled, rubbing his thumb over Woohyun’s laugh lines, stealing a slow, sultry kiss. “Good.”
The “Big Time Talk” writer covered the basics for the episode, explaining to Changjo what the day’s topics were and how he was basically there as a guest to challenge the starring idols to learn Teen Top’s knife-like choreography. He nodded along and asked a few questions, and then he asked, “And who are the other idols?”
She named two members of girl groups. “And Shinee’s leader, Onew, and L, from Infinite.”
L. His L. “Onew sunbae and L hyung?”
She nodded, carelessly flipping through her script. “There was someone else, but there was a cancellation, so L-ssi’s the replacement.” She grinned at him. “Of course Onew-ssi’s here, the PD’s been a Shawol since 2008, she’s a maniac. I think that when the other idol was pulled out, she wanted to bring Choi Minho in, instead, but we got L. It’s a good choice, good visuals.”
A cancellation? The other idol “was pulled out?” And now L was here. And Changjo was here. Showing off Teen Top’s knife-like skills.
Onew had done this. Onew had done all of this.
Why had he asked for Changjo instead of Ricky? What would Onew gain from putting Changjo and L together?
Changjo’s first thought was sabotage. In the middle of Westonic’s scandal, putting Changjo and L together, Onew might be trying to get them to expose themselves. But Onew had too much to lose and not enough to gain from that. Then it was altruistic? A favor to L? A favor to Sunggyu, somehow?
Onew had to want to see Ricky. He could’ve arranged for Ricky to come, but he hadn’t.
Changjo went to the green room. The fixed cast members were lounging, bored, talking to their managers, on their phones, gossiping with each other. The guests were being polite and quiet in corners, or wandering and milling. Changjo was the youngest person there, aside from one of the female idols.
Onew was standing by a table, having a friendly, serious conversation with a boring old actor. L was on a folding chair, starting to slouch, eyes glazing over, looking gorgeous and expertly styled and way too good for this crowd.
A woman near the door noticed Changjo and smiled. “You must be an idol.”
He smiled at her, bowing. “Hello, I’m Teen Top’s maknae, Changjo.”
L blinked, bored stupor immediately dissipating.
Changjo went around the room, politely greeting people.
“You’re here to show off fancy idol footwork?” the boring old actor asked.
Onew laughed. “Let’s do some choreography from Fly to the Sky, instead, or g.o.d., I can do that.”
Changjo smiled. “I’ve seen you perform, sunbae, you shouldn’t worry.”
Onew tucked his hair behind his ear. “How are your members?”
“Everyone’s good, thank you. We’ve been working a lot. I haven’t gotten to see my hyungs lately, and Ricky’s sad that he’s had to miss some vocal lessons, but maybe things will be normal again, soon.”
Onew held his gaze, and a subtle shift in Onew’s expression told him that the message had landed. The boring old actor squeezed Changjo’s shoulder and said, “You should be grateful to be so busy,” and then delved into a brief, dull lecture.
“Yes, of course,” Changjo said, bowing slightly. “I’m very grateful. I’ll keep working hard!”
While he was greeting everyone else, L moved across the room. To a different chair with a conveniently empty chair beside it. Finished being deferential to sunbaes, Changjo went over and sat down beside him. “Hi.”
His smile was subtle but there were stars in his eyes. “Hi.”
“I didn’t know that you were doing this show.”
His dimples popped. “I didn’t, either.”
They sat in silence for a minute.
L shifted, his knee brushing Changjo’s thigh.
They were together. They had this intense, private thing between them and it was still there. Being separated hadn’t weakened it. Changjo hated that they couldn’t talk or touch or make each other laugh, hated that L wasn’t gazing into his eyes or catching him up on everything he’d missed or wrapping around him like some gorgeous parasite who fed off of extensive skinship. But that connection they’d built still hummed between them. They didn’t have to talk to understand each other.
A staff member came in and said that it was time for everyone to go to the set. L shifted to get up, then smiled at Changjo. “Don’t make me look bad.”
Changjo balled one hand into a fist. “Fighting!”
L laughed, an easy, embarrassed laugh, and Changjo hadn’t felt so good in weeks.
It had been a hard choice, arranging for Changjo to be there instead of Ricky. But Onew had to protect Ricky, and that meant not exposing Ricky during such a sensitive time. Onew had decided that it was safest to leave Ricky out of it.
But loving Ricky meant looking out for Teen Top. And when he’d seen the opportunity not only to promote Teen Top, but also to bring Changjo and L together, he’d taken it. If he could make Ricky’s best friend happy, why not do it?
Seeing Changjo wasn’t nearly as good as seeing Ricky. But he was a link to Ricky, anyway, and Onew was glad to have him on set.
Changjo hung around the fringes of the set, watching the filming. Superficially, he was waiting for his moment to go on, but really, he was watching L. L looked really handsome, seriously, L was just of a way better class than anyone else up there.
Since it was an idol episode, there was a lot of attention on Onew and L and the two girl group members. Of the two girls, the sunbae was really smart and funny; Changjo could tell that she was going to get a lot of screen time. The rookie basically disappeared; she was too new to know what she was doing. Onew was good, solid; respectable, not controversial, a big name to carry the episode. The director seemed to be cutting to L a lot, which made Changjo feel really smug and proud. L told a couple of cute, insightful stories about being both an idol and an actor that got good reactions from the fixed cast, and he also said a few brief, blunt things that made everyone crack up. Changjo loved it when L refused to bullshit in public.
The host said that if they were all top idols, they should be used to picking up choreography pretty quickly. They agreed that they’d had to learn a lot of steps on the fly; it was just part of being an idol. The host said that he’d challenge them, then, to learn new routines right then and there, to prove themselves. Immediately, they started laughing and backtracking, and the fixed cast cracked up.
Changjo went out and did “Ah-Ah.” The fixed cast applauded approvingly, and he and the host had a little friendly back-and-forth. The idols came down to the front, fixing their clothes and adjusting their mike packs. He bowed solicitously to them, and the host asked him who he thought would do the worst. He said that of course they’d all do well. “L hyung already knows Teen Top choreography. We’ve done special stages together, Infinite and Teen Top, and covered each other’s songs.”
“No, no, that was a long time ago,” L said, laughing. “A long time ago.”
He went through the steps of “Rocking” slowly, showing them each bit of it. The rookie picked it up right off of the bat; the sunbae got like half of it and then played around, making everyone laugh. Onew did it really well, surprising him, and then tripped and almost knocked over the host. L studied his feet intensely, concentrating, and then picked it up - - well, not perfectly, or anything, but well enough to impress the fixed cast and anybody watching.
The host decided that the rookie and L had won the experiment, and that the sunbae and Onew needed some more practice, maybe. The host asked Changjo if he could do their choreography, for comparison. He went right into “Replay,” and then he did the sunbae’s biggest hit, and the rookie’s debut song, and then he did “Paradise,” for the thrusting. The fixed cast loved it, and the host asked why Onew was on the show when they could’ve just invited him. Then there was a whole thing where Onew acted accepting of that and pretended to be about to leave the set, joking back and forth with the host and the sunbae, and Changjo acted very amused and very deferential.
It was all fun, and good variety show banter. Finished, Changjo bowed and thanked the host and then walked offstage. His part was over, but he stayed to watch the rest of the filming, just to be near L.
L was doing a great job. Even better in the second half than the first. He responded to everything, and he laughed a lot, and he gave great reaction shots. He was all full of dimples and smiles and sexy amusement. He had a hilarious back-and-forth with the sunbae, full of snarky zingers, and Changjo knew for sure that was going to be in all of the teasers and commercials.
When the sunbae mentioned that L was a visual, there was buzz among the fixed cast members about what “visual” even meant, since all idols were supposed to be good-looking, anyway. They thought that they could tell an idol from an average citizen easily. The sunbae said that even backstage on busy music shows, the visuals stood out. She said that girl groups were used to being around regular male idols and didn’t even care, but when a visual walked by, everybody noticed. So the host had Onew, as a representative idol from a big company known for casting well, stand beside L, as a representative visual. Onew tucked his hair behind his ears and looked earnestly into the camera and looked as nerdy as possible, while L crossed his arms over his chest and smirked patiently and looked too cool for this shit and let everyone amuse themselves by admiring him. “Oh,” the host said, making a big show of nodding. “Now I see. Visuals are of a different class.”
Changjo was so going to play that clip a thousand times, right in Ricky’s face.
L was in a strange mood when he got back to the dorm. Laughing and aggressive one minute, tense and needy the next. He dragged Woohyun straight to bed, and he was amazing, first demanding, then submissive, incredibly into it, super responsive. But while Woohyun was inside him, he started moaning, “Changjo-ah, Changjo-ah,” and no way was Woohyun putting up with that.
“Whose cock is this?” Woohyun asked, thrusting into him, getting a little more forceful. “You can’t remember?”
“Aunnnhh, oohhh.” L grimaced, moaning, rubbing his sides. “God, I need it. He was there, Changjo, he was there.”
“At the filming?” Woohyun wondered how much of a coincidence that was. He shifted, pushing L’s knee up, thrusting deeper. L groaned, jacking himself, face flushed. He brushed L’s hand aside, not wanting L to get off just yet, wanting to keep this going, wanting to keep L moaning and turned on and full of his cock for a while longer. “Did seeing him get you excited? And now you want your hot, built dongsaeng on top of you, horny and rutting on you and calling you ‘hyung?’”
“God.” L laughed breathlessly, squeezing Woohyun’s ass. “Yes, yes. Ooohhh, ohh, unnh, don’t make fun of me.” He squeezed again, rubbing, moaning. “God, I want him.”
“He probably wants you, too,” Woohyun said, thrusting steadily. “He’s probably at his dorm, right now, giving it to Niel from behind, thinking about dragging his fat knob through your hot, tight hole.”
“Fuck,” L gasped, bucking under him. Dazed, panting, L groaned, pulling on his hips. “Fuck, yes, say it again.”
“He’d love to be where I am right now,” Woohyun said, pinching L’s nipple. “On top of you, burying my hard prick as deep inside you as I want, getting you all worked up. He’d give anything to bounce his balls up against your sweet ass, but you’re mine, tonight.”
“Unnnh, oh, Changjo,” L groaned. “Oh, oh, god, hyung.”
Woohyun kept going, fucking him, talking to him, making it good and filthy, getting him to beg for more words, more cock, keeping him crying out, until he was coming, spilling his load and moaning their names, both names, grateful and ecstatic.
He was perfect after that, sexy, cuddly, up for anything, devoted to pleasure. Woohyun enjoyed him all night, fucking him, pleasing him, whispering, “Love you, I love you,” until he moaned back, “God, yes, I love you, too.”
Changjo had stuck it in Niel like a dozen times and was still dying to fuck L. He was trying to convince Chunji to take it - - maybe a variety of asses would help - - when Ricky finally came back to the dorm.
Bounding over to him, Changjo shoved him roughly. “Where the hell have you been?”
“Practicing!” Ricky shoved him back. “What?”
“Onew hyung!” he exclaimed. “He was at the filming, he’s why they invited me on. And L hyung was there! L hyung! L! Hyung!”
“Onew hyung?” Ricky demanded.
“Why are you wasting time?! Tell me everything.”
“Okay, but you have to let me screw you after.”
“You can screw me during if it’ll get you to talk faster.”
That sounded like a challenge. “Get on the couch, then.”
“Bed,” Ricky decided, and led the way.
“Oh, yes,” Key panted, spread open wide, still dribbling cum. “Ah, oh-unnh, yes.” Moaning, lingering pleasure making him feel weak and elated, he rubbed his face against Onew’s cool, smooth sheets. “Jesus, hyung, oh, that was good.”
“Not finished, oh,” Onew moaned, rocking into him, huge and hard. “Can I keep going?”
“Close your eyes and think of Ricky,” Key advised, grunting as Onew’s thrusts jolted him. “That’ll end things.”
“That’s not, I don’t,” Onew panted, and then he groaned, and then he was moaning, “Ricky-ah, Ricky-ah,” and he picked up speed, thrusting eagerly, forcefully, rocking Key’s whole body. God, it felt amazing. “Ricky-ah, my lovely Ricky, my, my, oh, ooohh, oh!” Sounding shocked, Onew came, thrusting in quick and hard, driving into him urgently.
Mmm. Sated, Key relaxed. Onew pulled out, then collapsed onto him, a hot, heavy blanket. “You should’ve dragged L into a closet and screwed him,” Key said. “Or Changjo. He looks like a satisfying fuck.”
“I don’t want Changjo,” Onew mumbled against his back.
Hunh. “What’s it like, only wanting one person?”
“You only want one person,” Onew said.
What? He looked over his shoulder to see if Onew was losing it.
“Woohyun,” Onew explained.
Um. “And you, and Jonghyun hyung, and-”
Onew looked genuinely puzzled. “Do members count?”
Hunh. “Yes and no,” he decided. He only wanted one person? He didn’t know if he liked that at all. He’d never thought of himself that way. “I should branch out. I’ll have sex with Sunggyu hyung more often.”
He snorted. Never mind about EXO. “I’ll try Teen Top.” He smiled, twisting to look over his shoulder again. “Can I have Ricky?”
“That’s up to Ricky.”
Mm-hmm. “Maybe I’ll play with L.Joe.”
“Is that allowed?”
He snorted. “What do you mean, is that allowed?”
“Doesn’t Sehun - - no?” Onew guessed.
“I don’t have to ask Sehun for permission to mess around with L.Joe,” Key said. Hey! “Do you think that people have to ask Woohyun for permission to be with me?”
Onew looked embarrassed. “No?” he asked, already shifting away.
“I’m not property!” he exclaimed, flipping around and pushing Onew off of himself.
“No, no,” Onew said, smiling, moving away faster now. “Of course not.”
His own hyung! Of all people! “I’m in charge of my own sex life!”
“Hey, you just asked me if you could have sex with Ricky,” Onew pointed out.
Hmm. Maybe Onew had a point. “Nam Woohyun is not in charge of me.”
“Would L.Joe want you?” Onew asked.
“Don’t be stupid,” he said, getting off of the bed. “Everybody wants me.”
“Onew hyung did it for me,” Ricky decided, on his back, smushed up side-to-side with Changjo in bed, shoulders overlapping.
“Or for L hyung,” Changjo said. “Maybe not L hyung, personally, but for Infinite, for Sunggyu hyung and Woohyun hyung.”
“Maybe. But probably mostly for me.”
“Probably. He does a lot of things for you. He likes you a lot.”
He watched Changjo raise one leg into the air, watched Changjo’s toes point and flex. “My hyungs are way hotter than yours.”
“Do we have to go through this every time?” Ricky asked, already tired of this conversation.
“I’m just saying, L hyung and Suho hyung are way more handsome than Onew sunbae and Sunggyu hyung.”
“So you have one and a half visuals?” Ricky asked. “Mine are both leaders. Mine are both vocals. Mine are both hung.”
“If being hung matters, I’m better hung than you are.”
He rolled his eyes. “If being good-looking matters, I’m way more of a visual than you are.”
“Do we have to go through this every time?” Changjo demanded, dropping his foot.
Ricky punched him.
“Plus, mine have way more money than yours do,” he said, draping his leg over Ricky’s.
“Yes, Shinee’s Onew is very poor,” Ricky said.
“Do you miss him?” Changjo asked. “You probably miss him a lot. You’re probably all sad and lonely without him. You probably miss Sunggyu hyung, too. You’d probably, like, cry like a little baby if Sunggyu hyung decided that we couldn’t see Infinite anymore.”
Ricky swung his leg on top of Changjo’s. Changjo wasn’t talking about him at all, but if he pointed that out, Changjo would only get defensive and weird. “I’m not worried about it. On the eighteenth, I’m going to be in Shinee’s kitchen, eating cupcakes. And L.Joe’s going to be in EXO’s dorm with Sehun hyung. And Dongwoo hyung’s going to be with Chunji hyung. And Chen hyung’s going to be with Hoya hyung. And you - - I guess that you and Suho hyung can both meet at Infinite’s dorm to see L hyung and Sunggyu hyung.”
“Ah, foursome,” Changjo said, stacking his leg on top of Ricky’s. “You’re so sure it’s going to work out?”
“Everybody’s too involved now. And it’s not just the good, reliable members like Chen hyung and Hoya hyung. It’s the vulnerable ones like L.Joe hyung and L hyung, that the leaders don’t want to hurt. It’s the messy, noisy ones like Chunji hyung and Key hyung. It would be too complicated to pull everybody apart now, and if you break up some people but not other ones, it’ll be a disaster.”
“Maybe,” Changjo said.
“Last time things got bad, C.A.P. hyung let it be up to us, he asked us if we wanted to break things off with EXO or not. We all said yes, the only problem was Chunji hyung. Chunji hyung just got Dongwoo hyung back. He’s playing it cool now, but if the eighteenth and nineteenth come and go, and he hasn’t seen Dongwoo hyung, he’s going to make everybody pay.” He rolled onto his side, resting his head on Changjo’s shoulder. “What you need to do is check all of the calendars, to figure out who’s going to reconcile when. What’s everybody doing on the eighteenth, and who’s going to have to wait until the nineteenth? Somebody’s going to have to baby-sit L.Joe hyung and Sehun hyung, so is Suho hyung going to come here to see you during that? But what if Infinite’s free that night? Or what if someone’s out of town? Whose dorm should Sehun hyung and L.Joe hyung meet at, and when, so everybody else can meet up without being trapped baby-sitting?”
“Suho hyung’s going to want to see Sunggyu hyung before anybody.”
“I think that he’ll want to see you and L hyung, to make sure that you’re okay.”
“So he’ll see Infinite first.”
Sliding away from him, Changjo got up.
“Put pants on!” Ricky warned.
Changjo put underwear on, then sat in front of Ricky’s computer and started pulling up calendars.
Ricky yawned, stretching. Changjo was so predictable and manageable sometimes. Just had to know how to talk to him.
Sehun didn’t want to play some crappy game. He sat on the floor, slumped against the side of the couch, and wound string around his fingers, like he did every night while he waited for his hyungs to get so absorbed in their Thirty-Day Plan Entertainment Extravaganza, or whatever it was called, that they didn’t notice when he snuck out.
“What are we doing tonight?” Lay asked. “I have some more movies if you want to see them.”
“Tonight we’re having yaja time,” Chanyeol said.
Sehun’s head snapped up.
“No-sex yaja time,” Suho added quickly.
“Nice yaja time,” Chen added. “Not revenge yaja time.”
“Yaja time, for real?” Sehun asked.
Xiumin was already getting up. “I think I’ll go-”
“Ya, you, stay where you are,” Sehun ordered, and looked at the beagles again. “For real?”
“This was a bad idea,” Baekhyun said.
“Shush,” Chen said, nudging Baekhyun aside. “Yes, for fun.”
“Clean my room,” Sehun told Xiumin. “Go clean my room. Baekhyun, clean Lay’s room. Chen, clean Chanyeol’s room. Chanyeol, clean Suho’s room. Whenever you finish, you can do the bathroom. Lay, you do laundry. My laundry first. D.O. and Kai, you can clean the kitchen and make me something to eat. Something good.”
“Okay, I’m out,” Baekhyun said, turning away.
“Is this yaja time, or are you cosplaying C.A.P.?” Lay asked.
“I can’t cook,” Kai said.
“Let’s just play,” Suho said. “It’s just for a few hours, let’s have fun with it.”
“Easy for you to say!” Chanyeol exclaimed. “He didn’t give you anything to do.”
“Suho’s going to rub my shoulders and get me something to drink,” Sehun said.
“Half an hour,” Baekhyun warned. “I will do this for half an hour.”
Sehun brushed his members off of the couch and sat down, getting comfortable. While everyone else walked away, grumbling, he smiled at Suho. “Soju’s fine.”
L.Joe rolled over in bed. “I wonder what EXO’s doing right now.”
“You mean, you wonder what Oh Sehun’s doing right now,” Chunji said, in front of the mirror, trying on a new hat. “Oh, gosh. Wow. That marvelous Oh Sehun. What could he be doing right now?”
From the other bed, Changjo snorted. “Finally growing into his shoulders?”
Sitting up, L.Joe hurled his pillow at Changjo.
Standing behind the couch, Suho rubbed Sehun’s neck. As he dug his thumbs in, Sehun made a low, assessing sound. “That’s nice.”
He smiled. It was good to make the maknae happy for once, even if it was like this. “Glad you like it, hyung.” He could hear the other members still complaining, D.O. and Kai grumbling in the kitchen, Baekhyun demanding to know exactly how many boxes of porn DVD’s Lay actually owned.
“But I need every one of them,” Lay explained. “They’re all different!”
“Okay, that’s good, Joonmyun-ah,” Sehun said. He gestured to the floor in front of him. “Come around here and do some push-ups.”
Taken aback, Suho asked, “Push-ups?”
“Isn’t exercise important to you?” Sehun asked. “Do it.”
It was annoying, but he guessed that it was harmless. Probably Sehun just wanted to give him some physical punishment, tire him out. He walked around the couch and got on the floor. “How many?”
Taking a sip of his soju, Sehun sat back. He crossed his legs and smiled. “I’ll let you know when to stop.”
Annoying. But no matter what, Suho was Sehun’s leader, and hyung, and could stop this at any moment. Keeping that in mind, he played along. He counted out a few push-ups, and then a few more, and then he stopped keeping track. It was easier if he just let it happen and kept going, and didn’t focus on the number.
Lay walked back and forth in his peripheral vision, probably carrying tubs of laundry.
The exertion was starting to make him sweat, and he didn’t want to soil his shirt. Moving onto his knees, he took it off and tossed it aside. Then he sighed and looked at Sehun. “Ten more?”
Smirking like an evil, very evil, very satisfied man, Sehun murmured, “It’s all right, keep going, Joonmyun-ah. Hyung will tell you when it’s over.”
This was making him distinctly uncomfortable. Trying not to be creeped out by his own maknae, he went back down and did a few more push-ups. He didn’t want to think about the exact ways Sehun was making him nervous, but he couldn’t get that smirk out of his mind. He felt really aware, suddenly, that Sehun wasn’t just sitting there but was actively watching him. Watching his every move. And enjoying this.
He really, really wanted to put his shirt back on.
Oh, god, the maknae was getting off on this. This was some weird sexual thing.
He’d just turned himself into his own maknae’s sub.
Flailing up onto his knees, Suho snatched up his shirt and hugged it over his bare chest. “Sehun-ah!”
For one second, Sehun looked furious. Then he looked viciously pained. Then he schooled his expression and pointed across the dorm. “Go clean Chanyeol’s room. Switch with Chen, I want him now.”
Suho didn’t know what to say. He had no idea if he should scold Sehun or apologize or what. Part of him felt like he’d done something terribly wrong, and part of him felt like he should put a stop to this.
Also, he really did not want to clean Chanyeol’s room.
Although it would be a lot easier than cleaning his own room.
He decided to go along with it, for now. “Okay, hyung. Sorry.” Getting up, he put his shirt back on, and then he went to Chanyeol’s room. “Sehun hyung wants to see you. I’ll do this.”
“Oh, thank god,” Chen said, climbing out from under Chanyeol’s desk. He shook the dust out of his hair, and then he looked at Suho and laughed. “You’re all red and sweaty! What did he have you doing?”
“Oh, I can do that,” Chen said. On his way out the door, he added, “Try mixing up all of the shoes in the shoeboxes, it’s fun.”
L.Joe squirmed uncomfortably, rubbing his cock through his underwear. “When is C.A.P. hyung coming home?” he asked, rolling over again.
“Why, you want some cock?” Chunji asked.
“I’ll do you,” Changjo offered, sitting up on the other bed.
Unngh, yes, he wanted it. He wanted the maknae’s hard cock to stretch him open and fill him up. Biting his lip, he rubbed himself again. He wanted a big, hard cock. Like Sunggyu’s. Or Onew’s. God, he wanted to feel it. To see it. The maknae got up and moved toward his bed, and he shuddered, wanting it, helpless to stop it, his cock hardening.
“Ya, he didn’t say yes,” Chunji said, kicking Changjo away from the bed.
“He didn’t say no,” Changjo pointed out.
“He’s in a mood,” Chunji said. “When he’s in this kind of mood, you have to get him to say yes.”
“L.Joe hyung,” Changjo said. “Can I do you?”
Ashamed, he bit his lip. Shyly, he glanced at Chunji, pushing his underwear down, exposing himself, wanting it. “Yes, but. Chunji. Can you start it?” He hated asking, but, god, he needed it.
Chunji shrugged. “All right,” he said, taking off his hat and coming over to the bed. “I’ll tag you in when he’s ready,” he told Changjo, pulling off his shirt.
Moaning, excited now, L.Joe fondled himself, kicking his underwear onto the floor and spreading his knees.
It didn’t take long for Chen to figure out what Sehun was up to. The maknae wasn’t very subtle. Shirtless in front of Sehun, on the floor, he did crunches. It didn’t hurt him any to let the maknae look at his body, so he wriggled, nudging his waistband down, exposing his pelvic bone.
“You look nice, Chen-ah.” Sehun sounded very pleased with him. Such a pervert. “So fit. Get up now and do some jumping jacks.”
Jumping jacks, seriously? Chen relaxed, leaning back on his elbows and catching his breath for a second.
“So strong and healthy,” Sehun murmured. “Get me another drink before you start.”
He was going to be so much more grateful for L.Joe from now on. Groaning, he got up. He did not miss the way Sehun’s gaze raked over him, appreciative and definitely sexual. When he reached for the glass, Sehun smiled and held it close, making him lean in to get it. The wicked, delighted gleam in Sehun’s eyes was good to see, after all of the pain and fury of the last few weeks, but, seriously, the maknae was way too into this.
He went into the kitchen, where Kai and D.O. were singing together and cleaning out the fridge. God, it smelled. He got Sehun some cola, since the last thing he needed was for the maknae to get drunk during this.
The jumping jacks tired him out. Sehun’s gaze roamed all over him, wandering and revisiting every part of his body, sometimes steady on his face. Sehun looked really intent and focused sometimes, and amused and horny sometimes, but never bored. He couldn’t help it; a little part of him started to like it, because it really should have been boring, but Sehun never looked anywhere else, never lost interest. It made him feel really wanted, like he was sexier and more desirable than he’d realized.
“Go get some weights,” Sehun said. “I want you to work on your arms.”
“God, Sehun hyung,” Baekhyun complained, wandering over. “How much longer-”
“Get out, go back to cleaning,” Sehun said without looking away from Chen. “Don’t bother me, I’m busy with my Jongdae.”
“You are officially freaking me out,” Baekhyun said.
“Bring him some hand weights, while you’re around,” Sehun instructed. “But light ones, I don’t want to work him too hard.”
It was so funny, and sexy, and creepy, and flattering, that Chen laughed. “Is hyung looking out for me?”
“Of course,” Sehun said, smiling at him. “My Jongdae’s precious to me.”
Moaning, L.Joe rolled over so that Changjo could take him from behind. When Changjo thrust in, an electric jolt of pleasure thrilled him, and he moaned, masturbating.
Chen’s muscles ached, his arms burning. When Suho came in and said, “Okay, I think that’s enough, let’s stop for now, yaja time over,” he groaned, letting his arms go slack.
“Whew!” His body was relieved. Suho moved around the dorm, telling the other members. While everyone joked and complained, Chen watched Sehun, wondering how Sehun was taking it. It was hard to tell; Sehun was still staring at him. Sehun’s expression was more restrained now, more controlled, but the intensity and the hot desire were still there.
Moving very carefully, Sehun shifted on the couch. “Hyung.” His gaze dipped down Chen’s body, then back up. “Could we?” He looked tense and uncertain. “I won’t hurt you, I won’t do anything.”
“Yeah,” Chen said, setting the weights down. “I want to.” He really did. Kai and D.O. were coming into the room, complaining. He made a shushing motion and then took his pants off, moving toward the couch. “Shut up for a while, it wasn’t that bad, we needed to clean the fridge anyway.” He got onto Sehun’s lap, and Sehun’s hands slid over his thighs, dragging him closer. Grunting, breathing hard, Sehun kissed him aggressively, hungrily, and when he reached down, pulling Sehun’s cock out, it was already hard.
Chen could tell how strictly Sehun was controlling himself, by the way Sehun’s hands latched onto his waist and stayed there, gripping, massaging, but never traveling anywhere else. He lubed himself quickly, and when he eased onto Sehun’s erection, hips rolling as he slid down the shaft, Sehun groaned, fingers digging in. Moaning, “Ah, maknae,” he rubbed his forehead against Sehun’s, relishing the hardness of Sehun inside of him. “It feels so good like this.”
“Unnnngh.” Sehun squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed his nose against Chen’s cheek. “I want to fuck you so, so hard.”
He chuckled, finishing with a gasp as he moved on Sehun’s cock. “Oooohhh. Oh, mmm, could you? You wore me out already, exercising. I don’t know how long I can - - ooohhh, oh - - stay up here.”
Sehun pulled on his hips, controlling his movements, setting the pace for him. Then, making an anguished noise, Sehun let go of him, hands fluttering over his thighs before grabbing at the couch. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“It’s okay, you won’t,” he whispered, kissing Sehun’s cheek, brushing his hand over Sehun’s chest. “Come on, it’s okay.” He slid up, popping off of Sehun’s cock, and then he settled on his back, tucking one of the throw pillows under himself. “Here, here.”
Sehun hesitated, then crawled on top of him, pushing his knees up. “I won’t hurt you,” Sehun said, like it was really important for him to know it. And then Sehun slid into him, lodging deep.
“Mmm. You always make it so good,” he breathed, twisting a little, getting comfortable. “Mmm, you don’t have to be gentle, I understand.”
“Sweet, sweet ass,” Sehun murmured, fucking him in short, hard thrusts. He gasped, the repetitive jolts of pleasure singing through his body. “Sexy Jongdae, I’ll be good to you.”
Ordinarily, he’d scold the maknae for speaking to him so informally, but, “Ooohh, ooohh, ahmmmm,” he might be okay making an exception this time. “Oh, oh, so good,” he moaned, arching.
“Sexy Jongdae,” he breathed, stroking Chen’s side. “It’s okay to wiggle around, I know it feels good. You can slide that sexy ass all over my cock.”
He started to laugh, but a spike of pleasure turned it into a long, blissful groan. He was so going to get the maknae for talking to him like this, later, but, “Oh, ooohh, mmmnnngh, more, more,” for now, he just wanted Sehun to keep fucking him. These short, forceful thrusts were sending him to some amazing places. “Ooohooohho, yes, it’s so good.”
“Your hot ass is hugging me just right,” Sehun said, caressing Chen’s chest. He leaned close, his gaze dark and fierce, devouring Chen with his eyes. “I really like you like this, sweet Jongdae, you look prettiest when you’re enjoying me.”
Sehun’s hot, hungry stare made everything more intense, made Chen feel really focused on, really wanted. Moaning, he grasped his cock, but his fingers had barely wrapped around it before Sehun took his hand. “No, Jongdae-ah, I’ll do that.” Sehun placed his hand above his head, curving his arm, and then did the same with his other hand, crossing his wrists. “That’s right, Jongdae-ah, that’s good,” Sehun murmured, rubbing his chest. He shifted, adjusting his shoulders, lacing his fingers together, getting comfortable with the pose, and Sehun smiled at him, proud of him, approving. He blushed, embarrassed, and he squirmed, trying to get Sehun’s attention on his cock. He’d play along, but, god, he was rock-hard, and he needed Sehun to do something about it.
“Mmm, I know what you want,” Sehun said, sliding a hand between his thighs, cupping his balls.
“Ooooohhh, unmmmm, get me off.” He writhed again, trying to bump his erection against Sehun’s hand.
“It’s okay, sweet Jongdae-ah, I’ll be good to you.” Sehun stroked his cock, fingers slipping around the head. Groaning at the sudden surge of pleasure, he writhed involuntarily that time, his hips twitching excitedly, his interlaced fingers clenching and locking together. “That’s right, you can be as loud as you want.”
Good, because he wanted to be loud. Crying out, he shuddered, the pleasure coursing through him hot and intense. The forceful fucking combined with the rhythmic way Sehun was teasing his cock was too much for him to take, and knowing that this couldn’t last made him desperate to get as much of it as he could before it was over. “Don’t stop, don’t stop, god, maknae, fuck me,” he moaned, writhing, working his hips in every direction he could. “Yes! Yes!”
“That’s it, Jongdae-ah, come whenever you want, show me how much you love it,” Sehun urged, stroking his cock, staring at him like just the power of Sehun’s lust for him could get him off.
It was incredible, “Oooohhh,” this intense pleasure, “oounnnhhh,” this intense desire, “ouuh, oooh, oohhh.” He was almost there, and he cried out, reveling in it, stunned by this explosive high. And then he came, climaxing sharply. “Ooh! God, oh, unnngh!” Gasping, he felt radiant, and he moaned again, feeling high. Grateful, he hummed, satisfied, relaxing into it, his arms going limp. “Mmmm, ooh, mmm, maknae.”
Pulling out of him, Sehun stared at him, breathing hard. Jacking off with rough, quick jerks, Sehun said, “Close your eyes, close them.” He did, wondering why. A moment later, he felt the warm splatter of Sehun’s cum land on his chest. Sehun made a tense noise, like a pleased animal, and slid two fingers inside of him. Sensitive, he squirmed, and Sehun stroked him, adding a third finger. It felt good, and he writhed, his hips riding Sehun’s touch, his breath catching over and over again. He wasn’t ready to get hard again, but Sehun was working him up anyway, and his fingers knotted around each other, a sexual thrill racing through him.
“God, hyung.” Sehun slid his fingers out, and he gripped Chen’s thigh, pulling Chen flush against himself, grunting. When Sehun kissed him, he kissed back enthusiastically, ready for it, craving this intimacy. Sehun’s kisses were aggressive, claiming, at first, and he stroked Sehun’s neck, slid his hands into Sehun’s hair, his tongue stroking against Sehun’s, his breath coming fast. Slowly, gradually, Sehun relaxed, ferocity fading. He wrapped his legs around Sehun, snuggling up against Sehun’s lean, hard body, and Sehun made a soft sound, kisses turning docile.
He opened his eyes, and Sehun looked tame and shy. Smiling, he caressed Sehun’s cheek, rubbing his thumb over Sehun’s sideburn. “You okay?”
Sehun hesitated, then looked guilty. Really guilty and worried. “Are you okay? I-”
“It’s fine, it was good.” He thought that he’d been asked to close his eyes because he hadn’t been supposed to see Sehun coming on him, and he wondered how it had looked, what kind of expression had been on Sehun’s face, what had been going through Sehun’s mind. “I’m not upset about anything, it’s okay. But it’ll need to be a long time before we ever do it like this again.”
Sehun nodded hurriedly. Then his eyes lit up. “We can do this again?”
Oh, no. “What did I just agree to?” he asked, laughing. “Go, go, get off of me,” he insisted, pushing Sehun away.
“But, hyung,” Sehun said, moving obediently and helping him up. “It might happen again, sometime? Maybe?”
“We’ll see,” he said. He didn’t want to encourage this kind of relationship between them, and he couldn’t just let the maknae talk to him so boldly. But Sehun was so eager for it, he felt flattered enough to consider it. He lifted his face, and Sehun kissed him. “Now go make sure that the other members aren’t still holding a grudge about cleaning up.”
“The - - oh, shit!” Sehun laughed. “I forgot about that.”
L.Joe needed to hold onto something. He felt shaky. He needed some kind of reassurance, some kind of anchor. He crawled out of bed without any idea of where he could go. In the hallway, he turned around uncertainly. He thought about getting in C.A.P.’s bed, but he didn’t want a hyung. He needed someone who wouldn’t try to get the upper hand. He needed something comforting.
He went into the maknaes’ room and crawled into Ricky’s bed. Spooning up behind Ricky, he pressed close.
“Mmm, hyung.” Sleepy, Ricky rolled over, patting at him. “You want something?”
“No, no, just sleep.”
Ricky cuddled in. He hugged Ricky to himself, and then he just held on. Ricky’s solidity and warmth were the comfort he’d been searching for, and he closed his eyes, tucking Ricky under his chin. No pressure, no sex, no confusion, just a dongsaeng asleep in his arms. Gradually, a sense of security settled into him, and he felt stronger. Closing his eyes, he sank into a deep slumber.
On the sixteenth, Onew placed a bakery order. At the salon, he asked for a trim. Not too short, he just wanted a fresher, neater look for his reunion with Ricky.
On the seventeenth, C.A.P. lined his members up on the couch. “When the thirty days are up.” He didn’t bother to explain which thirty days; he knew it was on everyone’s mind. “What do you want to do?”
“Oh, I thought I’d go on a trip, get a nice hotel, hang around a pool,” Niel said. “What the hell do you mean, what do we want to do? We want to eat cock!”
“I want to see EXO,” L.Joe said.
“No, I want to see Infinite,” Chunji said.
“Is this up for a vote?” Changjo asked. “We’re all voting yes. We all agree. Let’s call all of the leaders and put everything back the way it was.”
“You all want to get back with Infinite?” C.A.P. asked.
“Yes, yes, yes,” Chunji said. “Six yeses, everyone agrees.”
“You all want to get back with EXO?” C.A.P. asked.
“Yes!” L.Joe exclaimed. He looked around, staring hard at the other members.
“What, we all agree, no one’s fighting you,” Chunji said.
C.A.P. sighed. “Is anyone here thinking with anything besides his cock?”
“What else would I think with?” Niel asked.
“Seriously, hyung, weird question,” Chunji said, laughing.
He had to admit, he wanted to see Infinite again, too. And he’d regret it if he could never slip it to Lay again. “Okay. I’ll see what Sunggyu hyung and Suho hyung say tomorrow. But I’ll tell them that we’re okay with getting back together.”
“Good meeting,” Niel said, getting up and shaking his hand. “I expect the dates and plans for future MTs to be on my desk tomorrow.”
All of the members got up and walked away. Except Ricky. Who sat there watching him with a patient, determined expression.
“What?” he asked, laughing.
Ricky’s mouth tightened into obstinate warning.
“You can see Onew sunbae,” he said, grinning. “As soon as he calls, I’ll tell him that everything’s okay.”
Ricky rewarded him with a bright smile, pleased and adorable. “Okay. Thanks, hyung.”
Irresistible. He pinched Ricky’s ear.
Suho gathered all of the members together in the front room. “This is a good time to go over our private agreement and talk about how we want to handle everything from now on.”
“Should we each take a turn and say what we want?” Lay asked.
“I think that we agree on everything,” Baekhyun said.
“Right. We’ll still see Infinite, and we’ll still see Teen Top, and we’ll go on MT as often as possible,” Chanyeol said.
“And Sehun gets to see L.Joe,” Chen said. “So the rest of us can live in peace.”
“What about Xiumin hyung?” Kai asked.
“Xiumin’s finished,” Xiumin said, shaking his head, putting both hands up. “Xiumin is done. I don’t even know about dates with Infinite and Teen Top anymore. I’m thinking, just stick to the members from now on.”
“And Woohyun hyung,” D.O. said. “Give him whatever he wants.”
“What?” Sehun asked.
“It’s nothing,” Xiumin said. “But, yeah, the members and Woohyun.”
“What about Dongwoo hyung?” Lay asked. “You have to see Dongwoo hyung. And Chunji, you like Chunji.”
“It’s good to be cautious,” Suho said. “We want to be smart. But I don’t think that overreacting helps anybody. Maybe not seeing all kinds of idols from all kinds of companies is a good idea, right now. But if we’re all seeing Infinite and Teen Top, and our sunbaes agree to it, then I think it’s okay if you participate, too, right along with the rest of us.”
“Right, you don’t have to have less sex than everyone else to prove something,” Chanyeol said.
“Right. Because that would be weird,” Baekhyun said, giving Suho a pointed look. “And not necessary. And annoying to all of the people who are trying to boink you.”
“Don’t say ‘boink,’” Suho said, embarrassed. Especially not about him!
“So what’s our agreement?” Kai asked. “Everything’s the same as before, no changes, except that Xiumin hyung’s not going to go off on his own anymore?”
“That’s okay with me,” Chen said.
“Vote yes?” Suho asked.
Hands went up all around the room. After a hesitant pause, Xiumin put his hand up, too.
“Vote no?” Suho asked.
All hands went down.
“Okay,” Suho said. He was proud of his members. He was glad that no one was holding enough of a grudge to try to single Xiumin out. “I think that it’s a good agreement for now.” Licking his lips, he brushed unnecessarily at his hair. “I hope that it will work for Infinite and Teen Top, too.”
“It will,” Chen said. “It has to.”
“I don’t know which of them is more likely to say yes or to say no,” Lay said.
“Sunggyu hyung and C.A.P. can both be kind of scary,” Chen admitted.
“What? C.A.P.’s not scary,” Chanyeol said.
“Did you forget how he stood in front of us in his practice room and said that he didn’t give a fuck about a single one of us?” Baekhyun asked.
“Yeah,” Chanyeol admitted, scratching his ear. “I prefer to forget about that and just pretend it never happened and we’re all close.”
“But seriously, Xiumin hyung, what’s this thing about Woohyun hyung?” Sehun asked.
Xiumin’s eyes darted from side to side, like he was looking for an escape. “Nothing.”
Stretched out beside Sunggyu in bed, Woohyun rolled onto his side, resting his head on his hand. He studied Sunggyu’s profile for a minute, and when Sunggyu looked at him, he smiled. “I don’t have anything to worry about, do I?”
“Ah. Well, your rimming technique-”
Laughing, he twisted Sunggyu’s nipple. “About Shinee! About the thirty days ending tomorrow!”
“Oh! Oh, about Key,” Sunggyu said. “Ow.” He rubbed his nipple, wincing. He was such a sensitive baby, sometimes. “Nothing to worry about.”
Glad to hear that, he kissed Sunggyu’s nipple. Then he kissed Sunggyu’s mouth. “Good.”
Sunggyu laced his fingers across his stomach. Then he looked over at Woohyun. “You’re not going to ask about Teen Top and EXO?”
“No.” He patted Sunggyu’s bare chest. “You’ll make the right decision.”
“Plus all you care about is Key.”
“That’s not true.” He grinned. “I care about L, too.”
“Mmm.” Sunggyu smiled at the ceiling. “So fuckable these days.”
Woohyun laughed. “He’s been fuckable since forever.”
“One of my favorite things about him,” Sunggyu said with great satisfaction.
Woohyun relaxed against Sunggyu, his head on Sunggyu’s shoulder. Sunggyu patted his hip. He stayed there for a minute, comfortable, and then he abruptly sat up, remembering. “Roll over.”
“So suddenly,” Sunggyu said, eyes widening.
“Roll, roll,” he insisted, gesturing.
“Why, for what?” Sunggyu looked suspicious and alarmed.
“You know for what. You insulted my technique.”
“And you want to prove things on my ass?” Looking shocked and exploited, Sunggyu pulled the covers up to mid-chest. “You leave my butt alone.”
He laughed, snatching at the sheet. “So modest!”
“You’re only so determined because I insulted your technique?” Sunggyu asked. He grinned, letting the sheet slip. “Woohyun-ah. You give terrible head. So bad at it, you should practice more.”
Grinning, he drew the sheet down, exposing Sunggyu to mid-thigh. “Really? You have any suggestions about what I should practice on? You have anything for me?”
“Just for you,” Sunggyu said, rubbing himself, his fingers gliding over the shaft. “All for you, tonight.”
“I want my phone, can I have it back?”
C.A.P. groaned and tried to ignore the demanding voice. He rolled in tighter against whoever was in bed with him.
The demanding voice kept bothering him. “It’s the eighteenth now, the thirty days are over, isn’t it time to give our phones back?”
How long had they known each other, and Changjo still didn’t know not to wake him up like this?
He was about to kick the maknae in the goddamned balls, when his phone rang. Groaning, he pushed himself up on one elbow and fished the phone out from under his pillow.
“Ricky! Ricky! Big sunbae’s calling!” Changjo shouted.
“What?!” Ricky demanded from another room. There was suddenly a crashing sound and then Ricky burst into the room, skidding to a stop beside Changjo.
Clearing his throat, C.A.P. rubbed at his face and answered. “Hello?”
“C.A.P.,” Onew said. Ricky jumped onto the maknae, clinging to his back. “It’s been a long time. How are things?”
“Pretty quiet around here,” C.A.P. said. Ricky was staring at him with wide, happy eyes and pounding an exuberant, impatient fist on the maknae’s shoulder. He sat up, and - - oh, it was Niel in bed with him - - Niel grunted, shifting. “How’ve you been?”
“Quiet here, too,” Onew said. “I wanted to invite Ricky to come over sometime soon. Unless he’s too busy.”
“No, he has time,” C.A.P. said. Ricky wrapped both arms around Changjo, holding on tightly, mouth open in a huge smile. “You can call him and ask him about it, if that would be easier.”
“I’ll do that,” Onew said. “Thank you.”
“Good to hear from you,” C.A.P. said.
Onew hung up.
“Yes!” Ricky shouted, jumping down from Changjo’s back. “Yes! Yes!” He dove onto the bed, throwing his arms around C.A.P.
C.A.P. hugged him, glad to see him so happy.
“Phones, phones, our phones,” Changjo said.
Oh, shit, he’d turned all of their phones off; Onew was probably trying to call right then. “Get them, it’s okay.”
Ricky bounded off of the bed, and Changjo dug the phones out of C.A.P.’s sock drawer. Hurriedly, they turned their phones on. Immediately, Ricky’s started ringing. “Oh!” he exclaimed and ran away. “Ah, sunbaenim,” he said in the hallway, his voice adorably sweet.
Changjo stared grimly at his phone.
“Bad news?” C.A.P. asked.
“They’re going to contact me before they contact you.” They’d better.
“Suho hyung will, but L hyung…”
“He’ll wait until Sunggyu hyung’s talked to me,” C.A.P. said. “Just like you’re going to wait, too.” He stared at Changjo in silence for a second to let that sink in. Then he added, “It’s early, they have to sleep, they have schedules.”
“Onew sunbae called.”
“Onew sunbae’s obsessed. He probably spent the whole past month watching a pair of vanilla cupcakes slowly get moldy.” His phone rang. “Does no one else know how early it is?”
“Answer!” Changjo shouted, pouncing on his legs.
“God, maknae,” Niel grumbled, kicking him.
“Hyung?” C.A.P. asked.
“Still calling me hyung?” Suho asked, sounding nervous and relieved.
“Speaker, speaker,” Changjo whispered, poking his thigh way too hard.
C.A.P. grabbed his hand and bent his fingers back. “Everything okay?”
“I hope so,” Suho said. “I have to make an apology to you and your members, but I’d rather do it in person.”
“Should I send L.Joe to you or are you bringing Sehun over here?”
Suho made a breathless, laughing, moaning sound. “Ah, you’re better to me than I deserve.”
“Wait, is that Suho hyung?” Niel asked, sitting up.
C.A.P. let go of Changjo to push Niel out of his face.
“I know that you don’t like to be around when I take Sehun over,” Suho said. “I could come to see you tonight, and bring Sehun tomorrow?”
“I don’t know if L.Joe can wait,” he said. “How about I come over to see you, and then after we talk, you can go to my dorm? I’ll stay at your dorm and catch up with your members.”
“Yes, yes, yes,” Niel said fervently. “Take me, you’re not even thinking of leaving me behind, I’m going with you.”
“Tonight?” Suho asked. “We’ll be back at the dorm early this evening, so come by when you get a chance.”
“Okay. See you then.”
“Thank you,” Suho said sincerely.
C.A.P. hung up and nudged Changjo. “Go tell L.Joe that Sehun’s coming over to see him tonight.”
“Did Infinite say no?” Changjo asked.
“No, no, no,” Niel said. “Infinite’s saying yes, Sunggyu hyung’s saying yes, the thirty days are over, everything’s okay now.” His eyes widened in panic, and then he socked Changjo, hard. “Don’t jinx it! Why are you jinxing it?!”
“EXO’s off tonight, and Infinite has time off, too,” Changjo said. “Suho hyung should be seeing them tonight, not us. Why is he agreeing to come here?”
“For Sehun’s sake?” Niel guessed.
“Maybe. Maybe he’s going to drop Sehun hyung off and then going to see Infinite,” Changjo said, but he didn’t seem satisfied by his own words.
“Maybe it doesn’t matter,” C.A.P. suggested. “Go tell L.Joe.”
“Wait, let me come,” Niel said, getting up. “I want to watch him freak out.”
L wasn’t interested in eating. He leaned against the kitchen counter, then curled over it. Melancholy, he mouthed his forearm.
Behind him, around him, his members ate and talked. Sungyeol was talking about how desperate Niel and Baekhyun were going to be for sex after thirty days without it, and Woohyun was pointing out that they’d probably had plenty of sex with their own members. “They weren’t celibate.”
“Yeah, but only screwing your own members is boring,” Sungyeol said.
Dongwoo laughed. “I don’t ever get bored! Am I doing it wrong?”
“I’m sorry that we’re so boring,” Woohyun said. “Maybe we should leave you alone from now on, if it’s such a burden.”
“What day is it?” Dongwoo asked suddenly. “When are the thirty days up?”
“Hyung,” Sungyeol said. “Seriously? Today! Today’s the day, what do you think we’re talking about?’
“Sex!” he said, laughing. “The same thing we always talk about.”
“What’s Sunggyu hyung going to decide?” Sungyeol asked. “I don’t have to worry, do I?”
“Decide about what?” Dongwoo asked. “It’s just waiting thirty days. The days are over, so we’re finished waiting. It was hard, I missed everybody a lot. It’s like when Chunji’s being punished and grounded, but for too long, and not just Chunji but everybody.”
“Did you - - doesn’t anybody ever explain things to you?” Sungyeol demanded. “Hyung, it’s not just waiting for it to be over. Sunggyu hyung might decide that we can never see anybody ever again. There might not be any more Chunji.”
There was a sudden shattering sound. “What?” Dongwoo asked. “I - - sorry, sorry - - what? No, don’t, it’s not safe, I’ll get it. Rags, I need a - - laundry room.”
There was a second of silence, and then Sungyeol whispered, “What?”
“The hell is wrong with you?” Woohyun whispered.
“If he didn’t know, don’t spring it on him now! Sunggyu hyung’s going to talk to everyone today, don’t freak him out if you don’t have to.”
“Why didn’t he know already?” Sungyeol whispered. “He honestly had no idea? What does he think everybody’s so upset about?”
“Missing friends, I guess.”
L straightened and walked past them and the mess of cereal and milk and shattered porcelain on the floor. Leaving the kitchen, he went down the hallway.
Dongwoo was in the laundry room, digging through a bin of clean sheets and towels. He plucked out a rag, and then he twisted it between his hands, shoulders curving forward.
L went over to him, putting a hand on his back. When he turned around, he was red-faced, tears streaming down his cheeks. “I didn’t know,” he said, and L hugged him. He clutched at L, gripping tightly. “I didn’t know,” he said, and sobbed.
Changjo was already dialing when his phone rang. Grinning, he answered. “Hi, hyung.”
“Maknae,” Suho said.
He sounded happy. Really happy, and relieved. “How’ve you been?” Changjo asked.
“I’ve had such good fan mail lately.”
He laughed. “That’s good, hyung. You’re coming over tonight, right?”
“Yes. I’ll be really glad to see you again. To see all of your members.”
“What about Infinite, what did Sunggyu hyung say?”
“I… I called C.A.P. first, and then you.”
“What?” he demanded. “You haven’t talked to Sunggyu hyung at all?”
“I had to make sure about you, first.”
“You don’t have to worry about me! Didn’t I tell you that everything’s going to be okay?”
“But I had to make sure.”
Changjo thought it over. “You’re not worried about Sunggyu hyung, are you?” When Suho didn’t answer, he groaned dramatically, flopping onto his back across his bed. “Hyung!”
“It’s not so easy!” Suho exclaimed defensively.
“Just call him. Hyung, seriously. He’s your close hyung, right?” He couldn’t say “boyfriend” over the phone but Suho would know what he meant. “You think he’s going to let go of you that easily? There are about a thousand guys who would kill to get that close to you. He knows what a good thing he has.”
“Has he talked to C.A.P.?”
“Not yet. But I’m not worried,” he lied.
“He’s worked hard for Infinite. EXO’s too much of a risk, he has to put Infinite first.”
“Then if you’re worried, don’t call. Go over there. See him in person.”
“I can’t just show up!”
“Sure, you can.”
“I don’t even know where he is, he-”
“He’s probably still at the dorm. Hyung, just go. Put your earnest, beautiful face right in front of him and make him say it right there in person.”
“Isn’t that manipulative?”
Changjo grinned. “Did you just admit with your own mouth that you’re handsome enough for it to make a difference?”
“Oh, hush.” Then Suho said, “I’ll see you tonight, all right? Whatever else happens, I’ll be glad to see you.”
Aw. Touched and embarrassed about it, he said, “I’ll be glad to see you, too.” Then he brushed his feelings aside. “Go settle things with Sunggyu hyung!”
Sunggyu got Onew’s call first. If the SM ban on contact was lifted, then the waiting period was officially over, he guessed. He called C.A.P.
“Let’s not be dramatic about this.”
He could hear the smile in C.A.P.’s voice. “Okay.”
“Everything’s okay on my end, is it okay on yours?”
“Everything’s good here.”
“So everyone can call and meet up and send selcas?”
“Yep. The more selcas the better, I think, today.”
He grunted to show that he understood. “Good. See you around.”
He hung up and looked at his phone.
He set it down.
He picked it up.
He frowned at it and firmly set it aside.
It was Suho’s job to call him. Suho had messed up. Suho was from the big company that had come up with the thirty-day ban in the first place. It was Suho’s responsibility to get in touch, not his.
He was hyung. And sunbae. He could take the first step.
He’d tell the kids about Teen Top first.
Changjo wasn’t clinging to his phone, or anything. He was just in bed, doing nothing, because he was bored. He just didn’t have anything better to do than hang out. And his phone was beside him because it was convenient. Maybe he glanced at it a few times, because his gaze happened to fall on it, but he wasn’t waiting around by his phone, all pathetic and emotional. He was just chilling.
He had a text message.
Text message he had a text message L it was from L he had a text from L and it was a photo it was a selca L had sent him a selca L had sent him a selca L was so freaking handsome and perfect. L looked like a man and a boy and a fairy all at once, and the L in the selca was smiling at him, smiling just for him, gazing at him with a gorgeous, relaxed, comfortable smile.
A second message popped up. When can you come to see me?
He immediately called.
“When?” L asked.
“Tomorrow. Tomorrow night. I’ll be over there tomorrow night.” He wanted it to be sooner, but with Sehun coming over and Suho coming over, he didn’t know if he’d have a chance. He hated not being able to see L right that very second, but he had to juggle responsibilities. He stared at L’s photo again. “When did you take this selca?”
“When I sent it.”
“This is new? This is how you look right now?”
“Shit.” So relaxed and sexy and handsome. He had to kiss L’s dimples. Like, he needed to do it, he could feel it like a compulsion burning in his chest. “Early tomorrow night. As early as I can.”
“It seems far away,” L said, in the tone he used when he didn’t want to expose his vulnerability but he couldn’t help it and he felt self-conscious about seeming weak.
“I know. I’ll come sooner if I can. I’ll be there really fast. Can you wait?”
“For you,” L said softly. “I can wait for you.”
Changjo hated that L was sad about anything, and hated even more that L was sad about him. But at the same time, he was freaking elated. They were talking. He had a selca. They’d be together tomorrow.
“Have you talked to Suho hyung?”
He opened his mouth to say yes, and then he belatedly heard the tone of L’s voice. L sounded braced; it was like listening to someone whispering, “Don’t hurt me.” Stunned, he said, “Yes, yes, he called me, he called C.A.P. hyung already, he made plans, my members are going over to his dorm and he’s going to apologize to C.A.P. hyung and then he’s bringing Sehun hyung over here. Tonight, that’s why I can’t see you tonight, I have to baby-sit and everything, I’m sorry, it’s a lot of weird timing, I - - he hasn’t talked to you?”
“He already talked to you,” L said. “He made plans.”
“Sunggyu hyung’s with you at the dorm, right? He hasn’t gone anywhere?”
“Good. Make sure that he stays. In the dorm.”
“Why? What, why?” L was suspicious.
“Because Suho hyung’s going over to see him. In person.”
“That’s good, right? It’ll be harder to refuse him in person. It’ll be harder to say no to his face.”
“I… I guess so. I think so.” L sounded encouraged and doubtful at the same time.
“Don’t tip him off! Don’t tell your members, and don’t make him clean up or get dressed or anything. He’s too suspicious, he’ll know that something’s going on. Let it be a surprise.”
“Can’t I at least tell him to shave?” L whispered.
“No, he’ll know something’s going on.” Changjo grinned. “Does he look horrible?”
“Yes,” L said, and laughed.
“Sunggyu hyung’s going to make the right decision, right? He’s not going to be stubborn about it.”
“He hasn’t said.”
“Go ask Woohyun hyung.”
“I want to talk to you,” L said. “Tell me everything I’ve missed. Tell me what you did all month.”
“I was on a variety show.”
L laughed. “I know that!”
He smiled. He’d made L laugh. “Hyung. Send me another selca, and I’ll tell you all kinds of things.”
Suho got dressed as quickly as he could, rushing through it like he had to be onstage in thirty seconds. When his members tried to ask him what he was doing, he said, “I have to go out for a minute. I have to take care of something.”
“Cologne,” Baekhyun said. “Fuck-me jeans. Cologne and fuck-me jeans. Did you talk to Sunggyu hyung? Are you going to see Infinite?”
“I’m coming, too,” Chen said immediately.
“What did they say, what did Sunggyu hyung say, is everything okay?” Baekhyun asked.
“Kids!” Suho exclaimed, turning to them. “No, I haven’t talked to anyone. And no one’s coming with me, I’m doing this alone.” He breathed for a second, trying to calm his nerves. “I don’t know what’s going to happen. I’ll do my best, and I’ll let you know.”
“Are you… Are you buying our friends back with sex?” Baekhyun asked. “Are you trying to seduce Sunggyu hyung to win Infinite back?”
That wasn’t at all what he was doing! That was exactly what he was doing. “It’s nothing like that,” he insisted. “I just think that it’s better to have this conversation in person.” And maybe, if it went as badly as he was worried that it would, maybe he’d get one last hug. A pity good-bye.
Dongwoo was on his hands and knees beside his bed, pawing through his bedclothes, looking for his phone, when he suddenly heard it ring. Oh! The sound was coming from behind him. Getting up and turning around, he found it on his desk. “Chunji-ah?” he asked, lifting it to his ear. “Are you okay? Are you healthy?”
“It’s been too long,” Chunji said. “I’m fine. I can’t see you tonight, but I can see you tomorrow night. Is that good for you?”
“Tomorrow night is good! I like tomorrow night. Will you come over here, or should I go to see you? Or should we meet out somewhere?”
“I’ll go to your dorm,” Chunji said. “I don’t want to waste time out in public.”
He laughed. He knew what that meant!
“Have you talked to Xiumin hyung?”
“No, not at all, not for a month. We couldn’t. I miss my Mini, I can’t wait to see him again. It’s been hard, not having you, not talking to him, not having anybody!”
“You miss him? You’re going to forgive him?”
“I don’t think that it’s right to hold a grudge,” he said. “Especially not over something like this. He should have been more careful, but it can be hard to be careful all of the time.”
“Oh, come on, anyone can get carried away with flirting, but these guys? Westonic? They’re trouble, they’re trash, they’ve always been unprofessional. Anybody could have told Xiumin hyung that.”
“They’re very flirtatious,” Dongwoo admitted. They’d always made him uncomfortable. “None of my members wanted anything to do with them. I’ll bet that Xiumin feels bad about it, I’m sure that he has regrets. Will you feel better if he apologizes?”
Chunji laughed. It was a bright sound he hadn’t heard in too long, and he smiled, his heart feeling lighter just listening to it. “Why are you worried about how I feel?”
“Because you’re Chunji.” He always cared about Chunji’s feelings. “And I don’t want there to be any problems between you and Mini.”
“No, there won’t be problems. As long as he doesn’t do it again. But I don’t think that Suho hyung would let him.”
“Tomorrow,” Dongwoo said. “I can’t see you tonight?”
“I have to baby-sit tonight. But you should go over to EXO’s dorm.”
“I - - wait, can I? Am I allowed? Our leaders haven’t talked yet.”
“Suho hyung hasn’t talked to Sunggyu hyung?” Chunji asked. “Why not? What are they waiting for?”
“I don’t know.” He felt really uneasy. His stomach was queasy. “Should I be worried?”
Sunggyu called Young Money and didn’t get an answer.
Maybe Money was busy. Working.
Maybe the thirty days weren’t up yet. Maybe SM was letting Shinee get back to normal but still punishing EXO.
He called again, to make sure. Still no answer.
He frowned. He wasn’t satisfied with this. “L-ah! L-ah!”
L came to his doorway. “Mmm?”
“Did you talk to that other team’s maknae?”
Who - - what - - “Changjo! Teen Top’s Changjo, did you talk to him?”
“Yes, today!” He looked for something to throw. “Are EXO and Teen Top talking again, are they screwing around again, did they forgive and make up?”
“Oh?” L scratched the top of his head. “Why do you care?”
The doorbell rang. It was annoying to be interrupted, and who was it, anyway? “Who is that?”
“I don’t know,” L said. “Could be anybody.”
Sunggyu didn’t like this. He was already worried, too worried, worried about some pretty hoobae’s feelings, worried about some skittish dongsaeng. He should’ve been worried about Infinite’s reputation, about protecting his members, about protecting himself. If any news came out about Xiumin, people would start looking at EXO, and they’d start with the leader, and how difficult would it be to connect Money to L, to him? But he was all anxious about whether his pretty little boyfriend was having a hard time, and whether Money would ever want to see him again, like he was a foolish kid with nothing more important going on in his life than whether some guy liked him.
“Sunggyu hyung!” Sungjong called.
Annoyances and interruptions. He wanted to force information out of L. He got up, tugging up his sweatpants where they’d slid down, and walked out to the front room.
Sungjong was standing there, looking judgmental. Sungyeol was standing there, looking wide-eyed. And Money was standing there.
Young Money. In his dorm. Looking very handsome and very anxious. Eyeing him like he ate hoobaes for lunch. There were no public faces here; this was all real, all private.
“We’ll talk in my room,” he decided. He didn’t want a half-dozen witnesses for all of this, and neither would Money. He turned and walked away, knowing that Money would follow. He pushed L out of his way. When he got to his room, he waited until Money was inside, and then he locked the door.
“I have to apologize,” Money said, like it was really important.
“Yes, good, apologize,” he said, and he kissed Money, one hand sliding into Money’s hair. So good, it was always so good with Money, every time. Thirty days without this dongsaeng in his bed had been way too long. Breaking the kiss, he asked, “Yes?” and pulled Money’s shirt off. “You’re apologizing,” he said, a reminder, and then he kissed Money again.
“I,” Money said. “Hyung, really. Seriously, I am sorry, I have to apologize.”
“I’m listening,” he said reassuringly, undoing Money’s fly. Oh, he got the skimpy black underwear, the sexy little stuff that Money only wore on days off and date nights.
“I’m serious,” Money insisted. When they kissed again, Money pulled on the front of his shirt, tugged on it like it was frustrating, and reached under it, stroking his chest. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. It won’t happen again, not like this, we’ve all talked, Xiumin hyung agreed, there won’t be any more sex outside of these special arrangements. Not with idols from other teams. He feels horrible, and so do I, we never meant to put our respected sunbaes in this position.”
“I understand.” He tugged the sexy underwear down, then pushed Money onto his bed.
“Are you even listening?” Money demanded.
“You feel bad, Xiumin’s going to stop screwing around, I got it.” Crawling on top, he reached for the lube.
“I feel like you’re not taking me seriously,” Money complained.
Setting the lube aside, he cupped Money’s face in his hand. Looking right into Money’s eyes, he said, “It’s been a long thirty days. We’ve all had time to be angry, and to question things, and to think about how things have been in the past and what we want for the future. We’ve all had time to wonder about each other and resent each other and miss each other. Did you come over here to break up with me?”
“No! No.” For a second, Money looked horrified.
“Did you come over here to break up Infinite and EXO?”
“No, no, hyung, I want to get back together, I want - - it’s so hard to talk like this, I can’t hold a conversation when we’re like this,” he complained, blushing.
“Okay.” He could be accommodating. “Talk first or sex first?”
Money licked his lips, blushing brighter. “Is the talk going to go well?”
“I might have to scold you. But I think things can be okay. Do you think things can be okay?” he asked, studying Money’s face.
Money’s smile looked so relieved and so grateful, it glowed. “I really, really want everything to be okay.”
“Then I think the talk will be all right.”
“Then.” Money shifted underneath him, tugging on the front of his shirt, trying to pull him closer. Money was all red cheeks and hopeful eyes. “Then maybe we can do this first?”
He kissed Money, reaching for the lube again.
Money was everything that he’d missed, eager for him, responsive, moving against him hungrily, kissing him like he was a miracle. Money’s hard, muscular body and soft, warm skin turned him on, and the way Money’s hot, greedy asshole sucked on his fingers told him it had been too long. Moaning like not having him was torment, writhing against him, Money stripped him impatiently.
“It’s been difficult, being apart,” Sunggyu said, fingers still stroking inside of him. “You’ve missed this. I understand. It was hard on me, too. But we can have this now. So let’s do this.” Slowly, Sunggyu eased inside of him, nudging deeper and deeper. Crying out, he shuddered, digging his fingers into Sunggyu’s thighs. “Is this what you’ve wanted? This is what you came here for?”
“Oh, ooohh, oh, sunbae, oooohhh.” Money kept trying to move against him, twisting and squirming, making all kinds of helpless, excited sounds. “Oh, oounnnhhh, ah, ah, god.”
“It’s been a long time,” Sunggyu said, thrusting just a little bit inside of him, letting him adjust to it. “Should I be slow? Should I be gentle? You’re not used to this anymore.”
“Ouunnnn, sunbae,” he moaned, jacking himself. “Oh, oh, I want to come, I need to come.”
“Don’t rush it,” Sunggyu said, fucking him in shallow, restrained thrusts. “You like sex, Money-ah, you like being full of hyung’s big cock. Just enjoy it, just let hyung make you feel good.”
Sunggyu fucked him for a long time, politely at first, then a little more urgently, and he only got more enthusiastic, more demanding. He was in constant motion, constantly noisy, full of energy and need, and when Sunggyu started giving it to him in long, forceful thrusts, he cried out joyfully and pulled his knees higher, begging for more.
There was maybe a point that Sunggyu was trying to make here. Maybe he was trying to remind both of them that he was good at this, that Money liked this, that he had something to offer that Money hadn’t found anywhere else. He wasn’t proud of himself for having spent the entire last month insecure and uncertain, but it was reality, and if Money was back with him, if he had a chance to remind Money how good it was between them, then he was going to take it.
Also, it was pretty obvious that Money hadn’t been fucked right in way too long, and he had to set that right. Money was too sexy and too needy to be neglected, so he’d try to make up for it.
After he’d gotten Money worked up and about to come, crying out helplessly and vibrating against him and making that sexy-adorable scrunched-up face that meant the fountain was about to erupt, he slowed down, kissing, whispering pretty things, making it personal. Money whimpered and called him “hyung” instead of “sunbae” and said, “I love you, I love you so much, I missed you so much, it’s so hard without you, don’t leave me,” and his heart got all twisted up in his chest and he devoted himself to Money’s pleasure, to Money’s heart, making sure that Money felt only good things, all of the good things. Finally, in a messy, noisy eruption, screaming for the whole dorm to hear, squirting all over the room, practically, Money came.
There was cum on Sunggyu’s face. Grimacing, he stopped thrusting and wiped it off. Money looked horrified, but wasn’t too horrified to keep from laughing. “Remember this,” Sunggyu warned him. “Now you owe me and someday I’ll get to come on your face sometime.”
He started thrusting again, and Money shuddered, making a horny, thrilled sound. Money was very pretty under him, messy but relaxed, gazing up at him like he was a romantic fantasy. He kissed Money’s neck, licking up cum, and he whispered, “I missed being in you like this, Money-ah, hyung missed everything about you.” He’d had to hold back and control himself a lot to give Money a good time, but now that Money was finished, he could let himself feel all of the pleasure, the hot grip of Money’s ass around his cock, the sensual hunger of Money’s embrace. Money’s arms tightened around him, thighs hugging his ribcage, and Money whispered, “Come in me, please, I want you to come, I want to do it all over again, I want you to fuck me again.” Hearing Money’s desire for him, feeling it surround him, made his heart pound, and he came, caught up in his love and Money’s need. Groaning, thrusting in again, he came in hot, urgent pulses.
“Missed you so much,” Money whispered, hugging him.
They cleaned up a little, because Money still liked to hose down the entire bed when he came. Then they talked. And snuggled, because Sunggyu liked to put his hands all over Money, and Money liked to rub all over Sunggyu’s body. Then they made out, and Money went down on him, because Money needed a constant diet of cock. Then they talked some more, because they needed to, to cover things, to discuss things, to clear things up. He had to say some things that Money didn’t like and didn’t want to hear, and the conversation got tense, but they got through it, and then they talked about some better things, some happier things, and made each other laugh. And then they made out again, and they made love, and it was even better, that time.
When they’d mostly finished cuddling and talking, and Money was relaxed and easy-going and taking him for granted, he smiled, because this was how things were supposed to be. This was what he wanted. He cupped Money’s face in his hand, and he kissed Money’s relaxed, happy mouth. “Hyung loves you,” he said, and Money smiled at him, looking goofy and drunk. “Hyung loves you a lot. You don’t have to worry about me.”
Money rolled closer, curling his leg over Sunggyu’s hip. “Mmm.” He ran his hand over Sunggyu’s chest, gazing up into Sunggyu’s eyes with a foolish, peaceful smile. “I feel like I don’t have to worry about anything.”
Suho felt amazing. He felt freaking amazing. He’d spent an entire month worrying that his life was falling apart, and not just his own but his members’, and his sunbaes’, and he’d felt responsible, and he hadn’t been able to fix it or work on it or reach out to talk about it, he’d just had to wait, his gnawing fears suspended in time.
But now everything was okay. Everything was great, and the ground under his feet was solid again. Solid, but bouncy, because he felt buoyant, he felt like he was springing around instead of walking.
Even after he was out of bed and dressed again, he kissed Sunggyu good-bye for about ten hours, because his life was fantastic, and kissing Sunggyu felt incredible, and he could do this, he could have this, he could have as much of Sunggyu as he wanted. “I love you,” he said, a hundred times, because he was in love, and he had a boyfriend, and he was too ecstatic to feel embarrassed.
Finally, laughing at him, Sunggyu shooed him away.
He still had some things to take care of before everything would be completely perfect. So he apologized to Sunggyu’s members. Especially Woohyun. And he talked to Hoya, because he felt horrible about disrupting Hoya and Chen’s relationship. And he talked to Dongwoo. And then Sungyeol and Sungjong. Until finally he made his way to L’s room.
He walked in cautiously, not sure of his welcome. He paused in the doorway and smiled.
L, sprawled on his back on the floor, smiled and got up. “I thought that you’d be with Sunggyu hyung for the rest of the week.”
He laughed, self-conscious, but it was so good to see L smile at him that he threw his arms out, grabbing L in a big hug. L hugged him back, and he closed his eyes, letting the moment sink in. He’d been worried about this dongsaeng, worried a lot. “I’m sorry,” he said, opening his eyes. “I’m really sorry, L-ah. I only have regrets about-”
“No, no.” L pulled back, giving him a sad smile. “You don’t have to say all of that.”
“I mean it,” he said firmly, drawing L closer again. “Do you understand that I mean it? I’m very sorry. Xiumin hyung feels sorry, too, and it won’t happen like this again. He won’t sleep around anymore. Not outside of what we arrange.” Looking into L’s eyes, finally, after weeks, it hit him all over again, how strongly he felt about this dongsaeng. “I’ve been worried about you. Worried about what you’ve been going through. It must’ve been difficult for you. I’ll be more careful, we all will, I won’t let this happen again.”
L swallowed and looked down, nodding. Then he smiled a crooked, twisted smile and looked away, laughing meaninglessly. He scratched his scalp, gazing away, and Suho didn’t say anything, gave him time to feel whatever he needed to feel, put both hands on his waist, anchoring him. For a moment, tears shimmered in his eyes, but when he finally looked at Suho again, they were fading. “I’m glad that you’re back.”
“I didn’t leave you,” Suho said. “I know - - it seems like it’s only semantics, or technicalities. But I didn’t leave you.” He needed L to understand him. “I couldn’t see you or talk to you, but I never turned my back on you. I know that it was hard on you, and I’m sorry, I’ll always be sorry for that. But don’t tell yourself that I came back, because I never left.”
L took a second, and then he nodded. “I missed you,” he said, and he hugged Suho again. It was a really good hug; L gave some of the best hugs ever, so comfortable and intimate, so emotional and reassuring, his body so warm and strong.
“I missed you every day,” Suho promised him, petting his back. “I love you.” It felt really good to hug him again. “Oh, I missed you a lot.”
L chuckled, hugging him tighter. “What exactly did you miss?”
Why did L have to have that suggestive tone in his voice? Embarrassed, Suho pushed him away. “Don’t tease me!”
L just laughed at him. “I didn’t say anything!” Catching him close again, L nuzzled his
cheek, and it felt so good he kind of went weak in the knees. “Do you have time before you go? Can we make out?” L kissed him, and his whole body got hot, all over, his hands sliding over L’s hips. “Can I fuck you, or are you too sensitive after Sunggyu hyung?”
He gasped, scandalized, laughing. “Don’t speculate about that!”
L chuckled, kissing him again. Oh, he’d missed the way L kissed. So sensual, so erotic, tongue stroking lazily into his mouth like L was confidently taking him over one lick at a time. They spent a minute kissing, just kissing, and then another one, and L cupped his ass, and he felt warm all over, felt good all over, pleasure and happiness radiating through him. He didn’t want to go too far, but he was already pushing L’s shirt up, splaying his hands over L’s chest, and when L tugged him towards the bed, he moaned, ready for it.
It had been hours.
Hours had passed, and Suho hadn’t gotten back to them.
Hours had passed, and no one had heard anything.
Chen was starting to lose it.
At first he’d been nervous, jittery, but he’d felt hopeful. He’d waited eagerly to hear back from Suho, for Suho to call and say that everything was okay, for Suho to walk in with good news.
Then he’d thought, well, maybe Suho and Sunggyu had a lot to talk about. There would be apologies, and explanations.
But time had kept carrying on, and he still hadn’t heard anything. No one had.
Were Suho and Sunggyu arguing? Having a fight?
Maybe they’d made up and they were having sex.
Suho took forever to get off, and Sunggyu liked to make love for a long time, but, seriously! How long did sex last?!
He needed to reach out to somebody. To keep from calling Hoya, he called C.A.P. Then he called and talked to Ricky. Then he called and talked to Niel. And Chunji. And L.Joe. And Changjo.
Managers came and went, taking the other members to individual schedules. Everyone kept reminding everyone to get in touch as soon as there was some news.
He was making out with Lay when his phone rang. “Hold on, hyung,” he said, surfacing. “I - - ahh!” It was Hoya! “Hello?” he asked eagerly.
Lay watched him with curious, focused eyes.
“Chen-ah,” Hoya said. “Chen’s greetings are the best greetings.”
“Oh my god, hyung, I’m going to have a heart attack,” he said, rubbing his hand over his chest. “Is everything okay?”
“Oh?” Hoya asked innocently. “Everything seems fine.”
“Our hyungs! Our leaders!” he exclaimed. “What did they say? Did they talk? Did they argue? Can I see you?”
Hoya laughed. “They did a lot more than just talk. And I don’t know, I don’t think that’s what arguing sounds like.”
Chen couldn’t believe this. “Did Suho hyung spend all of this time doing that?!”
“Maybe you and I could spend some time doing that,” Hoya suggested.
Chen moaned, melting on top of Lay. Lay laughed at him, patting his back.
“What are you doing tonight?” Hoya asked.
“Come over,” he said immediately. “Come to see me. You don’t have to be romantic, you don’t have to send flowers, you don’t even have to dress up, just show up in my dorm, please. I don’t want to go to dinner, I don’t want to go anywhere, I just want to be with you and talk to you and look at you and be in the same room for once.”
“Sounds like you missed me,” Hoya said.
“Tell him to bring everybody,” Lay whispered.
Lifting his head, he kissed Lay’s cheek. “You can bring your other members. Teen Top will be here, too. But I’m not sharing, I don’t want to share, I only want to see you tonight.” He’d missed everyone, he’d missed all of them, but he’d missed Hoya in a completely different way, and he had a whole month to make up for.
“I - - shit,” Hoya said, and he snickered. “Sorry, sorry.” He cleared his throat. “Sorry, it’s just funny.”
“What?” Chen asked, curious.
He coughed again. “When it comes to EXO, it’s not only the fan chants that get loud and enthusiastic.”
EXO - - loud and enthusiastic - - “No!” Chen exclaimed. “Is he still doing that?”
“He’s talking to L now.”
That horny, insatiable - - Chen couldn’t even blame him. “Well, don’t listen!” Sunggyu and L? Chen had never been with L, but he could certainly imagine it, and that one time with Sunggyu had opened up a lot. Oooohhhh. Running his hand over Lay’s side, he said, “Hyung?” His voice was deep and breathy, and he blushed, embarrassed.
“You’ve done those two things, right? You’ve. With L, and with Sunggyu hyung.”
“Yes. Is this news to you?” Hoya asked. “Did you just figure this out? Oh, Chen-ah, you’re too innocent.”
“Shut up!” he said, laughing. “I knew it already. I just… I was wondering what it’s like.”
“Ah. It’s not bad. They do okay.”
“And you…” He knew that, inside Infinite, the members weren’t shy, so asking was more of a technicality than anything, but he really wanted to hear the confirmation. “The game Suho hyung just played with Sunggyu hyung, that he’s playing with L, now. You’ve played that with both of them at the same time, haven’t you? All together?”
“Thirty days was too long for you, wasn’t it?” Hoya asked. “You’re falling apart now, aren’t you? Is this an emergency, should I call C.A.P. and tell him to get over there fast?”
“It’s not like that!” Maybe it was a little like that. He was just so horny. But it was really because of Hoya.
“Yes, it’s happened. The three of us have talked at the same time. I thought you knew that.”
He rested his cheek against Lay’s chest, picturing it. How did it happen? He could see Sunggyu and L double-teaming Hoya. Or a sandwich, Sunggyu giving it, Hoya taking it, L in the middle. Or Sunggyu pumping into L, and Hoya’s mouth opening for L’s cock, and Sunggyu’s hand in Hoya’s hair, urging him on, god. “Tonight, you’re coming over tonight, right?”
“Should I send L instead?”
“No!” He laughed, caught. “No, it’s not like that. I want to see you, I don’t care about anybody else.”
“Did your members forget to go near you at all for thirty days? Was it that bad?”
“They’ve been great, we’re always close,” Chen said, stroking Lay’s pelvic bone. Lay’s thumb rubbed over his cheek. “But it isn’t the same without you.”
Oh, god. Suho melted in the taxi’s backseat. He felt boneless. He felt like he was glowing. He felt like everyone in all of the cars passing by could tell that he’d just had too much amazing sex.
He really had to make up with L and Sunggyu more often.
He really had to have sex with Sunggyu and L back-to-back more often.
He’d been so worried. So anxious, for thirty days straight. Burdened by guilt. Trapped in stasis, sure that his world was falling apart around him, helpless to do anything about it.
But they’d forgiven him. They were sticking with him.
Strict, protective Sunggyu. Sensitive, bitter L. They loved him enough to forgive him.
He wanted to text his members to share his joy, to tell the great news, but he couldn’t get himself together enough to work his phone. His relief and the intense sexual euphoria coursing through him had him loopy, goofy. When he got out of the taxi, he started laughing happily, nonsensically. When he got in the elevator, he wobbled, and he leaned against the wall, smiling goofily. His face was hot; he couldn’t stop blushing. He kept wanting to tug at his clothes, to make sure that he was covered properly. He kept wanting to take them off and go back.
When he walked into the dorm, his members pounced on him. Baekhyun grabbed at him and Chen hugged him and Lay asked, “It’s okay? What’d he say?”
Chanyeol laughed. “Look at your face!”
“You took forever!” Chen exclaimed.
Laughing, blushing, he tried to push them all away, embarrassed, giddy. They all started laughing at him, teasing him, crowding around and asking him why he was blushing like that, why he’d taken so long, what he’d been doing in Infinite’s dorm that made him act like this. He clutched at Lay, holding on, shy and unbalanced, excited and wishing that he could tell them everything, wanting to tell it all.
“How’s Hoya hyung?” Chen demanded happily, trying to drag him away from Lay.
“How’s Sunggyu hyung?” Xiumin asked with a knowing grin.
“No, no, how’s L?” Baekhyun asked.
“Everything’s okay,” he said. “It’s all okay.” Lay was hugging him loosely, patting his back; he wanted to tuck himself in against Lay and stay there for a while. He felt really affectionate. He wanted to take Lay to his bed and cuddle. For a moment, he hesitated, but then he overcame his own resistance. It wasn’t like he was going to do anything sexual. A little skinship was normal. He pulled Lay towards the couch.
“Tell us everything,” Chen said, following. Everyone was following.
“Well, not everything,” Kai said.
“Hey, if he wants to tell us everything, I’ll listen,” Chanyeol said.
Suho sat, leaning against Lay, their arms around each other. He tucked his feet up behind him and cuddled in, running his hand over Lay’s chest. Oh, that was nice. “Sunggyu hyung was… He said…” It was a little difficult to remember the details of their conversation when all his brain wanted to focus on was the way Sunggyu had kissed him good-bye. Or the way Sunggyu had kissed him hello. The way Sunggyu had pushed him down onto the bed and - - his cheeks burning, he tried not to squirm. “He said… Everything’s okay now, it’s all back to normal, that’s what’s important.”
“We had to wait a whole freaking month, not knowing a thing, and now all we get is, ‘everything’s okay?’” Baekhyun demanded.
Lay smiled at Suho, patting his thigh. “You look so pretty when you’re bright red. What’s so embarrassing? We know about what you and Sunggyu hyung do together.”
“Do we?” Sehun asked. “I don’t. I don’t have any idea what they do together. It could be boring, it could be kinky.”
“Suho hyung doesn’t do kinky things,” Chen said. “It’s probably romantic.”
“Don’t speculate,” Suho scolded. “Sunggyu sunbaenim and I-”
“Sunggyu hyung,” Chanyeol corrected him.
“Sunggyu hyung and I talked a lot. He wasn’t happy about some things. I told him that we’d all agreed that there wouldn’t be any dates for anyone outside of Infinite and Teen Top from now on. We’ll stick to familiar territory. He agreed that’s best. And some of the Infinite members are coming over here tonight, to catch up and see everyone. I’ll have to go over to Teen Top’s dorm with Sehun, so I need you all to behave. Don’t get too excited and go too far. I know that it’s a lot of fun and you’ve missed your friends, but be sensible.” D.O. and Sehun were shooting each other looks. “What?”
“Nothing,” D.O. said, his face expressionless.
Nonchalant, looking bored, Sehun sat behind Suho, curving his arm along the back of the sofa. “Did you make plans for MT or anything?”
“No.” Everyone immediately looked whiny and pouty, mouths opening to complain. “Okay!” he said, laughing. “I’ll ask Sunggyu hyung about it soon. And I’ll talk to C.A.P. about it, too. But I want all of you to be very nice to your sunbaes tonight. They’ve been very generous and loyal in sticking by us, and we owe them a lot.”
“Don’t worry, we’ll be good to them,” Chanyeol said.
“Yes, I’ll show C.A.P. a lot of gratitude,” Baekhyun agreed, grinning.
Xiumin snorted, elbowing him. “That’s what you call it?” Sehun leaned against Suho’s back, tucking his fingers in Suho’s pocket.
“Does this mean that your big thirty-day entertainment plan is over?” Kai asked Chanyeol.
“Yes,” Chanyeol said. “It’s officially over.”
“We could have another movie night tonight, if you want,” Baekhyun offered. “I mean, I’d rather have sex with C.A.P. and finally get my cock back in Niel’s mouth again and go down on Hoya hyung, but, hey, if you want to watch movies instead, let’s just do that. Just as good. It’s totally just as good.”
“Yeah, okay,” Kai said, laughing. “Yeah, hyung, we’ll do a movie night, instead.”
“Great,” Baekhyun said. “That’s great.”
“Oh, we need a theme, though,” Sehun said.
“Kid movies,” Kai suggested. “Classic kid movies. All of that stuff we watched growing up. And Disney stuff.”
“Great, good, okay,” Baekhyun said. “We’ll sit here and watch ‘The Little Mermaid’ instead of - - no!” he shouted, smacking at Kai’s chest. Laughing, Kai tried to turn away, and he hit Kai’s back, instead. “No! No! Sex, I want sex! Teen Top! Infinite! We haven’t even been allowed to talk to C.A.P. for a whole freaking month, and he’s coming over here tonight to bend me over and stick it in, and some red-haired mermaid girl isn’t getting in my way!”
Laughing, Suho hugged Lay. Sehun’s arm curled around his waist.
“Oh, oh, mermaid cosplay,” Chanyeol suggested, grinning from ear to ear.
“Ew, no,” Lay said. “That’s weird.”
Chanyeol stared at Lay, jaw dropping. As everyone burst into laughter, he protested, “That’s weird? You think that’s weird? After everything - - you want us to be waiters and cheerleaders and naughty accountants, but this is too weird for you?”
“Hey, naughty accountants are hot,” Sehun said.
“Yeah, that one was okay,” D.O. said.
Suho had no idea how they’d role-played accountants, and he didn’t want to know, either. He relaxed, cuddled in between Lay and Sehun. It was really good to see everyone in a good mood, to see his members happy and joking. After their anxious, lonely month, things might get back to normal again.
His members hung out, speculating about who’d come over that night, arguing over who got to be with whom first, making plans for future dates. He was so glad that all of the stress was behind them, he just sat there, enjoying their banter, snuggled against Lay.
Then Sehun rubbed his stomach and whispered, “Hyung, can I talk to you?”
“Oh? Sure.” He was so comfortable, he was reluctant to move, but it had been a very rough month for Sehun, and if Sehun wanted to talk about something, he could understand. He got up, and they went to his room.
In his room, he turned around, expecting to talk. Instead, Sehun closed the door and kissed him.
Surprised, he laughed, pulling back. Sehun kissed him again, hand sliding over the back of his neck. “Maknae,” he complained, and then he kissed back, running his hands over Sehun’s sides. “It’s the middle of the day.”
“We don’t have to do anything,” Sehun said, backing him towards the bed. “I won’t put it in.”
“Won’t put it in,” he repeated, grumbling. “Who do you think you’re talking to, am I acting shy on our third date?” He couldn’t spend his afternoon making out with his maknae. It seemed too self-indulgent. There were times and places for sex, and this wasn’t one of them. He had a schedule to follow, and he liked that, it was exciting but it was comfortable, too. When he had scheduled sex, he knew when it was time for sex and when it wasn’t. If he could just drag one of his members into his room whenever he felt like it, he wouldn’t do anything else. He’d be in bed all day, every day.
“We don’t have to do anything,” Sehun repeated, sitting on the bed and pulling him in. Annoyed, he resisted for a second, but then he let Sehun haul him closer. “We can talk.”
“We don’t have to be on my bed to talk,” he pointed out as Sehun pushed him toward his pillow.
“But it’s nice.”
It was nice. They curled up together, face-to-face, and it felt really good to be tangled up with Sehun. With Sehun’s firm, male body. He ran his hands over Sehun, over the familiar terrain of his maknae’s lean body, and Sehun pulled him even closer. “Good-looking maknaes get away with everything,” he muttered petulantly.
“Of course,” Sehun said, like that should only be expected.
He sighed, stroking Sehun’s chest. “I miss Changjo.” It wasn’t something he’d said out loud until now. It was a lot easier to confess to, knowing that they’d see each other tonight.
“Um, how is that relevant?”
He frowned. “I just said, about good-looking maknaes-”
“Right, and what does that have to do with Changjo?”
“He-” Realizing the joke, Suho scowled and punched Sehun’s chest, then burst into laughter. “Don’t be cocky! Just because you’re so handsome, doesn’t mean that everyone else can’t be good-looking, too.”
“Mmm.” Sehun held him close, smiling. “Of course. I’m handsome. You’re handsome. That’s two.”
“Oh, just us, and nobody else?”
Sehun pretended to give it a lot of thought. Amused by his foolishness, Suho caressed his back. “Oh, there’s D.O. hyung, I guess.”
“No one else? Not anybody?” Suho asked. “Not Chanyeol, or Lay, or Xiumin hyung? What about L, he’s not good-looking?”
“I don’t know,” Sehun said, drawing it out, looking thoughtful. “I haven’t seen him lately. And we’re not that close, so I haven’t seen him in every situation. How handsome is he, really? What does he look like first thing in the morning, or after a long practice, or when he’s coming?”
“That…” Lust gripped Suho, leaving him breathless, memories flashing through his mind, desire fluttering in him. Turned on, flustered, he couldn’t turn his mind away from thoughts of L, mid-orgasm, L gasping, face pinched, L moaning, flushed, looking right at him. The way L rocked inside of him, thrusting deeper, moaning, “Oohhh, oohhh, hyung.”
“It’s that good?” Sehun asked, grinning, scanning his face.
“Talk about something else,” he said, squirming, his hormones making him agitated. “Something boring, what’s boring?”
“I talked to Kai earlier,” Sehun said.
“And?” he prompted when Sehun didn’t say anything else.
“And it was boring as hell.” Suho burst into laughter, and he said, “No, seriously, I wasn’t even paying attention. It was something about making plans with Taemin hyung and the two of them going out somewhere and I don’t even know, I wasn’t listening.”
“What were you doing instead, thinking about L.Joe?” Suho teased.
“God, I’m always thinking about L.Joe sunbae.” He hugged Suho more tightly, hooking his chin over Suho’s shoulder. Feeling sorry, Suho rubbed his back. “He’s perfect. He’s the most perfect thing in the world.”
“He’s special to you.” He stroked Sehun’s hair. “I’m glad that you have each other. I’m glad that there’s someone so special in your life. When I tried to find someone for you, I didn’t know where I’d end up. I’m glad that you’re with someone who means so much to you.”
“He’s amazing,” Sehun said softly. “From the beginning, he was perfect. He gives me everything.”
Suho wondered what that was like. To give over everything, to give himself completely. It sounded so trusting, to surrender himself absolutely to someone else’s will.
He shuddered away from the idea, and he knew why it got to him. Because sometimes. During sex. Sometimes he felt helpless. Like he couldn’t help himself. Like he was completely at someone else’s mercy. And it was terrifying. It was exciting. He hated that about himself, hated it so much. But it felt fantastic. It was thrilling. Addicting.
He wanted it again. He wanted to feel it. He wanted it now. Shuddering again, desperately aroused, he tightened his arms around Sehun.
“Sorry,” Sehun said, squeezing his hip. “Sorry, hyung. We’ll talk about something boring. Something totally dull.” Ashamed, he told himself to let go, to get away, but Sehun rubbed his back, and he stayed, breathing through it, trying to calm down. “Boring, boring,” Sehun assured him. “Have you heard Chanyeol hyung’s new song?”
That made him laugh. They talked some more, and he found himself relaxing again. Things were comfortable between them, and it was nice, just to talk and share skinship, just to be together. For the past month, they’d both been so tense and worried, Sehun so angry and betrayed, that they hadn’t connected like they usually did. Sehun had pushed him away a lot. It was good to be close again.
“Can I ask why you’re like this?” Sehun asked.
Sehun hesitated, gave him a cautious look, and didn’t directly answer. “Did Sunggyu hyung start something he didn’t finish? Did L hyung tease you? You didn’t get enough?”
Oh. Embarrassed, he mumbled, “No, it’s not that. Maybe I got too much.”
Sehun studied him.
Uncomfortable, he put up with it. He fixed his bangs and searched his mind for something else to talk about.
“Maybe Xiumin hyung should take me to see L.Joe sunbae tonight, instead.”
“Instead of me? Why?” What did that have to do with anything? “No, I want to go. It’s my responsibility. I want to apologize to L.Joe.”
“Maybe you shouldn’t see Changjo while you’re like this.”
“While I’m like what?” he demanded, indignant. “There’s nothing wrong with me. What are you saying?”
Sehun sighed. “You don’t have to get upset about it.”
“Who’s upset?” he challenged.
“I don’t want him to take advantage of you. He hasn’t seen you in a while, and he might go too far.”
“What’s too far? That’s between us, it’s none of your business. You think I can’t handle myself?”
Sehun rubbed at one eye, sighing again. “Do you really want me to answer that?”
He was outraged, and he knew that Sehun was right, and that only made it worse. He didn’t have a good defense, there was nothing he could say. Angry, ashamed, he said, “It’s not your job to worry about me. I’m the leader, I look out for you.”
“You’re my hyung,” Sehun said. “What kind of dongsaeng doesn’t care what happens to his hyung?”
“Then do you want to come in and watch us?” he demanded. “Stand beside the bed and make sure everything’s okay? Maybe we should record it so you can rewind parts and point out what you don’t like?”
“I knew I shouldn’t say anything,” Sehun muttered.
“That’s right, you shouldn’t say anything,” he insisted. “It’s not your place. This is my life, maknae, and I choose my own friends. I’m close to Changjo because I know that I can trust him.”
“Okay,” Sehun said. “Okay. But if you’re so close and you trust him so much, then can you tell him? Tell him that you’ve missed him a lot, and that you’re really excited to see him. Tell him that you’ve seen Sunggyu hyung and L hyung, and that you’ve had too much, and it’s affecting you. Tell him so he knows.”
No! No, he wasn’t going to say all of that! Well, he could, though. It was Changjo, and he’d gotten used to telling Changjo all sorts of things. Even private, embarrassing things. He licked his lips, considering it. He didn’t want to agree to the maknae’s idea, because he trusted Changjo. But he liked to be sexually responsible and set a good example when he could, and it was important to be forthcoming with his partners. “Communication is important,” he decided. “I’ll say something to him. But I don’t know why you think that you get to tell me what to do. You don’t see me interfering between you and L.Joe. No one has any idea what goes on between the two of you, and I don’t bother you about it.”
“Well, hyung, that’s right,” Sehun said, and grinned at him. “What’s private is private.”
Sunggyu sat on the couch and watched his members race around. Everyone was getting dressed, getting ready to go out, Sungyeol on the phone with Niel, coordinating schedules. “You’re all abandoning me,” Sunggyu accused. “Leaving me here all on my own.”
“You won’t be alone,” Woohyun said.
No? “You’re not staying.”
“No, of course not,” Woohyun said, grinning. “But L will be here.”
That’s right! “L-ah!” he shouted.
“Are we not going to get to see Chen hyung at all?” Sungjong asked.
“No Chen for you,” Hoya said. “He’s all mine.”
“We’ll give you an hour together,” Woohyun said. “Two hours. Then I want some.”
“You’ll have other guys to mess around with,” Hoya pointed out. “Someone else can give you head.”
L shuffled out of his room. “What?” he asked, ruffling his hair.
“Here,” Sunggyu said, patting the cushion beside him.
L came over and sat beside him.
“You should come with us,” Dongwoo told L and Sunggyu. “It’s more fun with more people. I want everyone to play together. It’ll be more fun if you’re there, too. I never get you and Mini at the same time, wouldn’t that be good?”
“Sunggyu hyung and Xiumin hyung at the same time?” Sungyeol asked. “No, thanks. Too many hyungs at once.”
“L and Chen at the same time.” Hoya eyed L, licking his lips.
“Oh,” Sungjong said, looking interested.
“Okay, yes, you should come with us,” Sungyeol said, grabbing L’s hands and dragging him off of the couch.
“No, no,” L said, laughing, trying to pull away.
“You don’t have to have sex if you don’t want to,” Dongwoo said.
“I can make out with you while Lay hyung screws me,” Sungjong said.
“I like looking at you while I get off,” Sungyeol said.
“Why can’t you look at EXO?” L asked.
“I don’t like them as much as I like you,” Sungjong said.
“We haven’t gone out at all for a month,” Sungyeol said. “You should come along just to get out of the dorm.”
“EXO won’t mind,” Woohyun said. “They’ll be glad that you showed up.”
“What am I supposed to do, sit around watching everyone else screw?” L asked.
“Sure, it’s fun,” Dongwoo said.
“Leaving me out?” Sunggyu demanded. He wasn’t going to sit around all by himself while everyone else went out. “I’ll go, too,” he decided, getting up.
Woohyun, Sungyeol, Hoya, and Sungjong exchanged looks. L laughed at them.
“Oh, you all want L there, but not me?” he asked. “L-ah, L-ah, come with us, we need you, it won’t be the same without you. What about me?”
“Oh, oh, you should come,” Dongwoo said, like he was just remembering something. “Lay wants to see your cock, he can watch me blow you.”
Sunggyu groaned and sat down again.
The dorm was in chaos. When Suho went into the bathroom, Chanyeol was in the shower, washing carefully, trying to get Kai to tell him if his balls smelled clean. When Suho went into the bedroom, Baekhyun was trying to find his pretty panties, while Chen was pointing out that it didn’t matter what his underwear looked like, since it wouldn’t stay on for more than a second. Xiumin kept complaining that the whole place was a mess and no one would help to clean it up, and Sehun kept popping up asking if Suho was going to be ready to go soon. “Maknae!” he finally exclaimed. “We can’t go until I’ve talked to C.A.P., and he’s not here yet.”
“But once he’s here, and you’ve talked, then we can go, right? You’ll be ready?”
Exasperated, he wanted to make a comment about how L.Joe wouldn’t melt away and disappear if Sehun wasn’t there as soon as humanly possible. But he understood Sehun’s impatience. “I’ll be ready, we’ll go as soon as I’ve talked to Teen Top.”
Everyone was still dashing around acting foolish when the doorbell rang. Half of the group rushed towards the door, and when Suho shouted, “Members!” Lay froze, caught in mid-step, and Baekhyun and Kai crashed into each other. Suho rolled his eyes. “I have to talk to them first. Don’t be so eager. There are still apologies to make. Are we civilized hoobaes or horny animals? Go to your rooms if you can’t behave yourselves.” Pushing past them, he opened the door.
Ricky smiled at him. “Hi, hyung.”
“I’ll be in my room,” Lay said, turning away. Laughing, Kai put an arm around him, pulling him back.
Niel smiled but hung back a little, watching C.A.P. “Sunbae,” Suho said, bowing a little.
“Not that,” C.A.P. said, coming in, pushing Ricky, pulling Niel along. “The month is over, right?” Niel came in and closed the door. They set their phones by the door. “We can go back to normal.”
C.A.P.’s willingness to get past what had happened only made Suho feel more burdened by guilt and regret. “You shouldn’t be so generous. I haven’t even apologized properly. And things aren’t exactly the same as before. Xiumin hyung’s not going to see other guys anymore.”
C.A.P. nodded, adjusting his hat. “Changjo told me.”
“How does Changjo know?” Suho didn’t remember telling him.
“L told him.”
“Well, it’s true. We won’t recreate this problem.”
“I knew you wouldn’t let it happen again,” C.A.P. said.
C.A.P. trusted him. It wasn’t a simple thing for C.A.P. to trust someone with Teen Top, and Suho knew how precious that faith in him was. “I know that everyone’s eager to catch up and play, but I don’t want to start that again until I’m sure that everything’s okay between us. Let’s not rush in with hormones until it’s all straightened out.”
“We took time off,” C.A.P. said. “It’s either break up or get back together, and I don’t want to break up.”
Looking from C.A.P. to Suho, Niel asked, “Then everything’s good? High-fives and hugs all around?”
“Yeah, all right,” C.A.P. said, and hugged Suho. “You don’t have to look so worried. I’m not pissed off.”
“I’m sorry, anyway,” Suho said, returning the hug. He hugged Niel, too, and then Ricky, who patted his back and said, “It’s okay, hyung.”
“How’s L.Joe sunbae?” Sehun asked.
“He’s all right,” C.A.P. said, while Niel said, “Go to him, go now.” C.A.P. said, “He’s fine,” and Niel said, “You should be on your way already, I don’t understand what’s taking you so long.”
“I need to leave now,” Sehun told Suho, while C.A.P. said, “It’s not an emergency,” and the doorbell rang.
“We’ll go in a second,” Suho said as D.O. opened the door.
Infinite members poured into the dorm, Woohyun putting an arm around D.O., Dongwoo hugging Lay and squeezing his ass, Sungyeol greeting everyone enthusiastically. Suho blushed, surprised to see L, and then Sunggyu walked in, and he felt hot all over. Thrilled, self-conscious, he laughed foolishly and touched at his bangs, hoping that he looked okay.
“You came,” Lay said.
“Does that mean what I hope it means?” Chanyeol asked.
“Say yes, say yes,” Baekhyun urged.
L gave them a puzzled look, then laughed, shaking his head, putting one hand out. “No, no, it doesn’t mean that.”
“No sex?” Lay asked.
“Maybe some sex, later,” Dongwoo said. “It’s not good to rule things out. Where’s Mini?”
“He’s, uh, in his room,” Chanyeol said, gaze swinging from one leader to another.
“Tell him to come out,” Dongwoo said, starting off. “Mini mini Xiuminnie!”
“I, uh, didn’t know you were coming,” Suho said to L and Sunggyu. “Of course I’m glad that you’re here!”
“We won’t interrupt things,” Sunggyu said. “You can all go have your fun.”
“You can go in my room, if it’s more comfortable,” Suho offered. “Or here’s fine, or - - do you want to eat, should I order something?”
“Don’t you have baby-sitting to do?” Sunggyu asked. “Go, run your errands. Everything’ll be okay here.”
Not wanting Sunggyu and L to be bored or uncomfortable, he looked around at his members. “Remember to be considerate. Be thoughtful about our guests.”
“Right,” Chanyeol said, nodding earnestly. “Sure.”
“Hyung,” Sehun said impatiently.
He wanted to hug L and Sunggyu, but not in front of everyone. It was embarrassing. He really wanted Sunggyu to kiss him before he left. “I don’t know when I’ll get back, it might be late.”
“Don’t worry, we’ll all still be here,” Sungyeol said.
He’d go to see Changjo, and come back, and L and Sunggyu would still be there? It was overwhelming; he didn’t let his mind linger on it. For a second, he wanted to invite L to come along to see Changjo, but he stifled the impulse. This visit was about L.Joe and Sehun, and they already had three baby-sitters; they deserved some privacy. Sehun was at the door, staring at him, and he was sure that Sehun wanted to grab him and drag him outside, or just run off without him. “Okay, we’ll go now.”
“Right, bye,” Niel said.
“We won’t miss you, take your time,” Baekhyun said.
“Say hi to Chunji for me,” Sungyeol said.
Smiling, L shook Suho’s hand. The affectionate twinkle in L’s eyes went right to Suho’s heart. “See you later.”
It wasn’t fair that L could do so much to him with one smile. “No one will interrupt you if you want to take a nap in my room.”
“You are not napping during an orgy,” Sungyeol told L.
“Why does everything have to be an orgy?” Suho asked. “You’ve all been out of contact for a month, don’t you have things to catch up on? You’ll do some talking, won’t you?”
“We can talk later, in other places,” Sungyeol said. “We can talk in public, over coffee. I’m here to do things I can’t do in public.”
“We could talk while we bang each other,” Chanyeol suggested.
“No, no talking,” Niel said. “If my mouth isn’t full the entire time, you’re all doing something wrong.”
If Suho had needed a cue to leave, that was it. He headed for the door, but he had to pass Sunggyu to get there. Hesitating in front of Sunggyu, he licked his lips, not sure what to say. He couldn’t kiss or hug or say private things right out in front of everybody.
They were only his members, though. And Sunggyu’s members. And Teen Top. He didn’t have to hide things from D.O., or from L, or from Ricky. He hugged Sunggyu. When Sunggyu hugged him back, he was so happy, his eyes closed. “I-”
Everyone broke out in applause.
“So cute,” Chen said.
“So that’s what it looks like,” C.A.P. said.
“Eh, one out of ten,” Hoya said.
“One?” Suho demanded, embarrassed, bristling, starting to pull away.
“Ignore them,” Sunggyu said, drawing him back. Cupping his face, Sunggyu leaned in as if about to kiss him, then veered away and said, “Have a good visit with that maknae.” Then Sunggyu leaned in again, tilting his face up, coming deliciously close, tantalizingly close, before lifting away without making contact. “You aren’t sure what time you’ll be back?”
Sunggyu was teasing them with the near-kisses, but was teasing him, too. Each time Sunggyu’s mouth came close, his heart pounded, anticipation turning him on. “Don’t know,” he said breathlessly, resisting the urge to pull Sunggyu in again.
“Okay, well.” Sunggyu leaned in for a third time, hovering so close to his lips that he had trouble not moaning, not closing his eyes and going for it. “Hmm.” Again, Sunggyu moved back, letting go of him this time, smiling brightly like everything was great. “We’ll catch up later, then.”
He loved this hyung so much, he couldn’t stand it. “Don’t tease,” he said, hugging Sunggyu again. He needed to feel Sunggyu’s mouth on his, but being in Sunggyu’s arms soothed some of that need. “Make yourself at home, okay? Take a nap wherever you want, eat whatever you want. You can do things with my members if you want to, they like everything.”
“What?” D.O. asked.
“Did he just?” Baekhyun asked.
“I’m okay with it,” Chen said.
Sunggyu kissed his cheek, then nudged him towards the door. “Don’t worry so much. It’s fine. Go enjoy your baby-sitting.”
“Wait, is baby-sitting the part where he sits and waits for Sehun and L.Joe?” Chanyeol asked. “Or the part where he plays with Changjo?”
While everyone else snickered, L smiled in a way Suho knew meant trouble. He headed for the door, and while Sehun unlocked it, he heard, behind himself, L asking, “Sorry, what’d you say?”
Chunji walked into his room. “Are you-”
“Ya!” Bright red, L.Joe snatched at his pants, yanking them up. “Get out!”
Clearly, he’d interrupted something. “What are you doing?”
“Nothing! Get out! The door’s closed!”
“It’s my room.” Taking in L.Joe’s slick fingers and the bottle of lube on the bed, it wasn’t hard to figure out what he’d been up to. “Were you fingering yourself?”
“No! Get out!”
He didn’t want to leave. He was too interested in what was going on in here. “Is this part of getting ready for Sehun? Are you prepping your ass for its master?”
“God! Don’t say it that way!”
Weird little freak. “Want help?” Going over, he picked up the lube.
“Don’t make it strange. Let me see, how many fingers were you up to?”
Chunji nudged L.Joe around, and he turned, dropping his pants again. He leaned forward and mumbled, shyly, “Just one.”
“Here.” He rubbed the puckered entrance to L.Joe’s body, and L.Joe shuddered, moaning a little. When he slipped a finger in, L.Joe squirmed. “Too tight,” he murmured. This was turning him on; he liked L.Joe’s shy moans and horny writhing and snug hole. “How does Oh Sehun Oh Sehun like it?” Two fingers now, and L.Joe was leaning over, groaning, one knee on the bed. “Does he like you too tight, likes forcing it on you? Or does he like you open and loose like a sloppy slut?”
“God, god, just shut up,” L.Joe moaned, rocking against Chunji’s hand.
“I have to know what your goal is here.” As he worked L.Joe open, he watched his fingers disappear into L.Joe’s body, watched the rhythmic thrusting, the way L.Joe’s hole opened for his scissoring fingers. “This is my favorite side of you.”
“Ohh, ohh, hmmm.” Writhing, L.Joe moaned. He was undulating, his hips moving eagerly, his head falling forward as he screwed himself on Chunji’s fingers. When his body accepted two fingers more easily, Chunji tried three, and he groaned, shuddering. “Please, please.”
“Keep begging, and you’ll feel my cock in you next,” Chunji warned.
“Nnnn, oh, don’t,” he moaned, arching his back like a cat, showing off his ass.
“Hey, they - - whoa, what’s this, can I play?” Changjo asked.
L.Joe groaned, moaning, “No, no,” and trying to cover his hard-on with one hand, his muscles contracting around Chunji’s fingers.
The doorbell rang. “Go get that,” Chunji instructed. “I’ll be there in a second.”
Changjo gave them another interested look, taking everything in, and then jogged away.
“You want to stay in here?” Chunji asked, still spreading him open. “I can send Sehun in.”
It took L.Joe forever to answer, and then he gasped, “Yes.”
“Okay.” Chunji pulled his fingers out and wiped them on one of L.Joe’s t-shirts. He gave L.Joe’s bare ass a light pat and walked out, tugging his shirt down over his hard-on. No sense in letting anyone think that L.Joe actually turned him on.
Dongwoo found Xiumin in his room, sitting on the side of his bed.
“What are you doing in here?” Dongwoo came into the room. When Xiumin only gave him a smile and a, “Hey,” he thought that it seemed like something was wrong. Dropping Lay’s hand, he sat beside Xiumin on the bed.
“Everyone’s here,” Lay said, sitting on the other bed. “Half of Teen Top and all of Infinite. L and Sunggyu hyung, even, everyone came. No one seems angry.”
“No one’s angry,” Dongwoo agreed, putting his hand on Xiumin’s back. “Is that what you’re worried about? You think that we’ll be angry with you?”
“Aren’t you?” Xiumin asked. “You should be. Sehun is. Key is.”
“You made a mistake,” Dongwoo acknowledged. “Aren’t you human? Everyone messes up. All you really did was have sex with some other idols, and that’s normal, that’s a private thing between adults. You didn’t go too far, making sex tapes and passing nude photos around. They were the ones who really messed up, they took risks and got caught. I don’t want to hold that against you, I don’t think that’s right. Chunji doesn’t, either. Do you?” he asked Lay.
“No, I’m not angry,” Lay said. “I think it’s important to reflect, and I know you’ve done that.”
“You’ve reflected?” Dongwoo asked, stroking Xiumin’s hair.
Xiumin gave him a disbelieving look. “I haven’t thought about anything else!”
“Sehun’s angry? He’s going to see L.Joe now, isn’t he? He’ll feel better after that,” Dongwoo decided. “It was probably hard on him, being separated from his puppy. It was hard on me, being separated from Chunji.”
Xiumin winced. “I’m sorry.” Groaning, he hugged Dongwoo. “I’m so fucking sorry. I never meant to do that to you. God, I feel like the biggest fuck-up in the world.”
“No, don’t feel that way.” It felt good to hug Xiumin again. “I missed you.”
“I love you,” Xiumin said. “Does Woohyun want to kill me?”
“Woohyun? No, I don’t think so. He’s upset about not being able to see Key,” he admitted. “But he won’t hold a grudge.”
“Are you sure?” Xiumin scratched the back of his neck. “I think I should go apologize to him. And give him five folder bows and three blowjobs.”
Sometimes having sex in the middle of a fight only made everything worse, but sometimes it was exactly what everyone needed. The right kind of sex at the right moment could be healing. “I’ll go get him. Let him drill your ass, he likes making hyungs holler.”
As soon as the door closed behind Suho, Chanyeol asked, “It’s okay to have sex, isn’t it? That part about ‘be thoughtful’ and being considerate to our guests, that doesn’t mean that we can’t screw, does it?”
“Did you miss the part where he specifically, explicitly told Sunggyu hyung to bone us?” Baekhyun asked.
“Did you miss the part where Chen said, ‘Yes, please, that’d be great?’” Sungyeol asked.
“Yeah, I heard that,” Hoya said.
“Oh, no!” Chen said, laughing. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Yes, you did,” Woohyun said.
“You can stay out of it,” Hoya told Woohyun.
“I don’t care what you do,” Sunggyu said. “C.A.P.’s here, he can be in charge. You’re leader tonight, I’m on break.” He went over to the couch. “Maknae, bring me a drink.”
“He means you,” Hoya told Sungjong, when nobody moved.
“No, he means Kai,” Sungjong said.
“No, he means Ricky,” Kai said.
“I’m a guest!” Ricky protested.
“Get him a drink,” C.A.P. said, pushing Ricky towards the kitchen. “Everybody else, meet me in Kai’s room.”
“Yes, good, got it,” Niel said, grabbing Kai’s hand and hurrying off. Kai snatched at Sungjong on the way by, pulling him along, while Sungyeol and Baekhyun followed, grinning at each other.
“Are you going to be in my room?” Chen asked Sunggyu.
“Why, you want him to meet you there?” Hoya asked.
“What - - no! Stop that,” Chen said, laughing. “I thought that you and I could be in there, but Suho hyung said that Sunggyu hyung and L should use it, so if they’re going to, we have to find somewhere else to go.”
“Use Chanyeol’s room,” L said.
“Or you could use my room,” Chanyeol told L. “Chen can use his room and you can use my room. If you want to take a nap. Or do anything else. Whatever you want. On my bed. Like before.”
“Before?” Ricky asked, coming back with a glass in hand.
“L and Hoya hyung had sex on his bed once, and he can’t get over it,” Chen said.
“Hot,” Ricky said, placing the glass on the coffee table in front of Sunggyu. He bowed. “Just for you, hyung.”
Sunggyu caught him by the wrist, tugging him in between Sunggyu’s knees. “You’re all right?” Sunggyu asked, looking up at him. “Your family, your members, Onew? Everything’s going okay?”
“Yes. I’m fine, everything’s good. Onew hyung took good care of me while we were apart, and I’m going to see him soon.”
“Come to see me soon, too.”
“I will,” Ricky promised, and dropped a light kiss on Sunggyu’s lips.
“Woohyun-ah,” Dongwoo said, coming out from the bedrooms. “We need you.”
“Lay needs more bodies?” he guessed.
“Mini wants you.”
“I was going to start with the other guys,” he said. “But I’ll catch up with Xiumin hyung later.”
“He feels bad,” Dongwoo said. “He wants to make things up to you.”
“Later,” Woohyun said, nodding.
“I’ll come,” Ricky offered.
“Yeah, fun,” Dongwoo said. “Come on,” he put his arm around Ricky, “let’s show Mini a good time.”
Woohyun watched them go, arm tightening around D.O., who glanced at Woohyun’s face and then after Ricky. “You want to go with them?”
“Not tonight.” Woohyun’s gaze lingered on the doorway for another second, and then he smiled at D.O. “What are you in the mood for?”
“A lot of things,” D.O. said. “Can I have you now, before you start with everybody else?”
“Sure,” he said, chuckling, steering D.O. down the hallway. “You can be my appetizer.”
Hoya looked at Chen, then at L and Sunggyu. “So I’ll just go see what Lay’s up to,” he said, gesturing in that direction. “If the three of you want to-”
“No!” Chen said, laughing, grabbing his hand. “The three of us nothing! It’s the two of us, you and me, the two of us.”
“Oh. Ah, I see, us?” Hoya asked. “I didn’t know, I thought-”
“You didn’t think anything,” Chen said. “You know I’ve been dying to see you. Come on.” Smiling, he backed up, pulling Hoya along. “We need to do an official inspection of Chanyeol’s sheets.”
“Are they new?” Hoya asked.
“Good enough,” he said, following.
Alone, L sat down beside Sunggyu.
“Thought you were going to watch,” Sunggyu said.
“I don’t want to see all of that.” L crossed his arms over his chest and slouched down, leaning against Sunggyu’s shoulder.
Sunggyu put his hands in his lap. Tapped his thumbs together.
Baekhyun was crying out, begging for it.
“We could order food,” Sunggyu suggested.
“Yes,” L said, straightening again. “I’ll eat.”
Sehun could barely wait to get through the door and into Teen Top’s dorm. When he didn’t see L.Joe, he had a dreadful second of panic. Then Chunji said, “He’s in our room.” Not listening for anything else, Sehun made a beeline for it, going right in.
L.Joe was on the floor, on his knees, his hands behind his back, his collar on. He stared up at Sehun with widening, wondering eyes, a joyful smile spreading over his face.
His pet. His perfect pet. His fantasies of L.Joe, intense as they were, were never as good as the real thing. It had been too long; Sehun felt lust running hot and dangerous through his veins. Slamming the door shut, he said, “Television.”
“Sehun-ah,” L.Joe breathed. He was completely naked, exposed, his wiry body, his black pubes, his arousal, everything on display. His smile was grateful, ecstatic, his eyes bright.
“Did you do what I told you to?”
“Yes, Sehun-ah.” He stared up joyfully as Sehun approached him. “Just for you, Sehun-ah.”
“Good.” His body was having its usual fierce reaction to L.Joe, his cock hard, straining against his fly. “Show me your fuckhole.” The last month had been so bad, now that he was with his pet again, he wanted to do everything. He wanted to make his pet beg, and cry, and moan, and worship him.
Blushing, L.Joe turned his back to Sehun. Leaning over, his ass in the air, he reached back with both hands, holding himself open, showing off his shiny, lubed hole.
Groaning, Sehun undid his fly. He had needs, and he was about to sate them. “Good pet,” he said, his voice low. Going down on his knees, he groped himself, getting into position. “Don’t come,” he ordered, and he thrust in.
He was rough, careless, ramming L.Joe too hard. Crying out, L.Joe rocked forward, arms flying out as he tried to catch himself. Sehun slammed in again and again, forcing himself deep, balls swinging. “Sehun-ah, ah, ohhh, Sehun-ah!” L.Joe’s body was the perfect, snug haven Sehun had craved, and he writhed in Sehun’s grip. Sehun yanked on his hips, fucking him harder, harder, wanting him to feel it, remember it, making him take it whether he wanted it or not. Shuddering, he moaned, “Please, Sehun-ah, please,” and hearing that made lust and victory roar through Sehun.
Needing it to be more personal, more intense, Sehun popped out of him and shoved him onto his back. Whimpering, he pulled his knees up, staring up with desperate, adoring, hungry eyes. “Please, Sehun-ah.” Holding his knees to his shoulders, his feet in the air, his pouting, slick hole exposed, he moaned.
Jerking him closer, Sehun thrust into him again. “Worthless cock slut,” Sehun said, starting to pant, fucking him hard enough to work up a sweat. The insult made him whimper, and Sehun’s forceful, punishing thrusts were making his whole body shake. “Sick cumwhoring trash. Acting like you haven’t had it in years, when we both know you’ve been getting it in every end, every second of every day. How much cock have you had this month, hyung? How much cock have you sucked this week? How many cocks did you jam up your ass yesterday?”
“Sehun-ah,” he moaned miserably, jolted by each rough thrust.
“Still begging for more,” Sehun accused. “Still begging for mine. Can’t ever get enough, even when you’re drowning in it.”
“I need it,” L.Joe moaned. “I need you. Please, Sehun-ah.”
“I’m inside you right now, you’re twitching all over my hard cock, and you’re still begging for it,” Sehun said. “You’re a sick little cockslut, hyung.”
“Don’t,” he begged, squirming. “Oh, oh, don’t, oh.”
Recognizing the quaver in his voice, the helpless hitching of his hips, Sehun groaned, turned on by his neediness, by his responsiveness. “Be a good pet, hyung. Don’t get yourself in trouble.”
“I have to come,” he moaned, digging his nails into his own thighs as he held his knees up. “Please, please, Sehun-ah. Please, I have to.”
Wanting to be sure that L.Joe lost this battle, Sehun fucked him long and hard. When Sehun ordered him to touch himself, he came almost immediately, crying out, ecstatic and ashamed. He whimpered miserable apologies as Sehun smeared his cum across his face. His helpless excitement and his sexual confusion were such a turn-on, Sehun fucked him even more vigorously after that. Not wanting to come again, desperate not to disobey, he begged Sehun to stop, begged for it to end, but hearing his protests and feeling him squirm only made Sehun want him more, only made Sehun fuck him faster. When Sehun ordered him to masturbate again, but reminded him not to come, he was so conflicted that he started crying, tears leaking from his eyes. He struggled to hold back, trying to obey, desperate to be a good pet, but it was inevitable: he came again in thick spurts, quick and messy, moaning Sehun’s name.
Relishing his surrender, Sehun pumped into him, then pulled out and came on the floor, between his legs.
Whimpering, he looked up at Sehun with worried, disappointed eyes. “Sehun-ah?”
“Did you want my cum?” Sehun asked. “Wanted it all for yourself?”
“Yes,” he answered immediately. “Yes, Sehun-ah.”
“Why? Tell me why, hyung, why do you want my cum?”
“Because it’s yours.”
“Because you’re a greedy little cumslut and all you’re good for is sucking up cum?”
He struggled with that, conflicted, lowering his legs, his gaze darting from side to side. Finally he swallowed and said, “I’m a greedy cumslut, but I’m your slut, Sehun-ah, I’m yours, I want your cum, I need it.”
“If you want it, take it,” Sehun said, backing off of him. “You can have it. Scoop it up and put it all in your slutty little fuckhole.”
L.Joe didn’t make it pretty, didn’t put on a sexy show. He moved quickly, greedily. Rolling up onto his knees, he swiped his fingers through the cum Sehun had squirted on the floor. He jammed his messy fingers inside of himself, shoving Sehun’s cum as deep up in there as he could reach. He repeated the action until all traces of Sehun’s cum were gone, and then he just knelt there, panting, moaning softly, knees spread, two fingers hooked in his own ass. His need was raw and real, and it showed in every line of his quivering body.
Sehun wanted L.Joe so much, his desire was a rich, craving ache. He took his clothes the rest of the way off, then grabbed a tie from the pocket of his discarded jeans. At the sight of the red-striped school uniform tie, L.Joe moaned, shrinking back. There were all of the usual, erotic, protesting moans as Sehun tied L.Joe’s wrists together behind his back. Wanting him, proud of him, Sehun clutched a handful of his hair and mouthed his jaw, bit at his cheekbone, kissed the side of his head. Then Sehun got up, snatching at his collar and dragging him towards the bed. “Time for your punishment. Two punishments, since you came twice. You know what the first one is.”
“No, no, please, don’t, don’t,” L.Joe moaned. Sitting on the foot of the bed, Sehun dragged L.Joe facedown across his lap. Arms tied, L.Joe was helpless to resist, unable to defend himself, and Sehun forced him into position. His pert ass was a perfect, inviting target, and the way he wriggled and begged only made Sehun enjoy it more. “No, no, Sehun-ah, don’t, don’t!”
His protests made the experience richer, more rewarding, so much hotter. He was desperate for it to stop, but not desperate enough to end it. He was humiliated, but he was still willing to go through with it. He’d let Sehun do this; he’d let Sehun do anything to him, anything at all. Whatever Sehun wanted, whichever lewd acts and degrading games Sehun dreamt up, he went along with all of it. He hated this, and he let Sehun do it anyway, because he was the pet, and Sehun was his owner, and he adored and obeyed. He loved this, he wanted it, and he trusted Sehun with it, let Sehun be the one to give it to him.
Sehun spanked him with harsh, punishing smacks, then made him kneel on the floor, his weight on his knees and his head, his ass up. He was used to displaying his ass on command, but it was a difficult pose for him, and he mewled pitifully, struggling to balance, his back obediently arched. Admiring him, Sehun circled him a few times. He looked beautiful like this, his ass bright red, his arms tied tight, his eyes squeezed shut, his cheeks red and tear-stained. “Such a pretty pet,” Sehun murmured, stroking his tense thighs. “Say my name fifty times.”
L.Joe chanted it reverently, “Oh Sehun, Oh Sehun,” like each syllable was delicious in his mouth. He got up to seventy-five before Sehun stopped him.
Oh, god. “Oh, god,” D.O. breathed. Luscious heat swept through his body as his arms coiled around Woohyun’s shoulders. Woohyun was bare-chested, hot and muscular, kissing his neck, massaging the small of his back. So turned on he was shuddering, he closed his eyes, breathing in, and then Woohyun’s hand slid down, cupping his ass, taking hold of him and pulling him forward, nudging him right against Woohyun’s body. Against Woohyun’s arousal, “Oohhh,” he could feel it, long and hard against him. “Unnhh, oh g-g-god,” he moaned, his voice shaking. “Hard, I’m so ha-a-ard.” His erection was a throbbing, demanding ache, and the pressure of Woohyun’s hard-on subtly rocking against it made him groan.
Rubbing his ass, Woohyun kissed across his collarbone to the other side of his neck, mouth hot against his skin, fingers dragging along the cleft of his ass, feeling him up right through his pants. It felt fantastic, god. He wanted it, his body wanted a whole lot of things, but not with this hyung. He was so turned on and so ready for more to happen, he was tempted to give in, but he knew that Woohyun was too much for him. He could only handle this hyung in small doses. “No, no,” he said, pushing Woohyun away, catching his breath.
A questioning smile; Woohyun studied his face, falling back a step. “Had enough?”
He felt cold everywhere Woohyun had just been; he wanted to move toward Woohyun’s heat again. “That was incredible,” he admitted, tugging at his pants, trying to make room for his erection. “You’re incredible. But you can go see the other members.”
A second of hesitation, and then, “Okay.” Woohyun kissed his fingertips and brushed them over D.O.’s lips, then smiled, a charming, sensual smile. “More next time.”
He nodded, already looking forward to it.
But for now, he needed something else. When Woohyun left the room, he took a deep breath, processing, adjusting. Yeah. He knew what he needed.
He went to Xiumin’s room to get Ricky.
Ricky was busy, deep inside Lay and making out with Xiumin, so D.O. hung back, not wanting to interrupt. When Ricky came, though, D.O. asked if he had a minute, and he said, “Yeah, hyung, okay.”
D.O. took him to the bathroom so he could wash up first. Sometimes sweat and musk and the scent of other guys was a turn-on for D.O., but sometimes it was too much, too sexual, an escalation and a distraction. When he was clean and drying off, D.O. kissed him, drawn to him, horny, and he kissed back gently, politely, letting D.O. lead.
D.O. took the lube from beside the sink and led Ricky back to the bedroom. Locking the door, D.O. leaned back against it. Heart pounding, he felt eager for this, felt ready for it, anticipation sizzling. Turned on, he kissed Ricky and undid his fly, exposing himself, his hard-on rising into the air. “Can you go down on me?”
“Mmm, I like your cock, hyung,” Ricky said, hand stealing over his hard-on. He groaned, hips canting forward, and Ricky kissed him, fondling his cock. “You want me to suck it?” Ricky whispered, and he was so hard he moaned, impatient now, pushing Ricky downward. “So hot for it,” Ricky said, rubbing his shaft, kneeling in front of him, and he felt like he was getting harder with every touch, with every word, his cock pulsing, aching. When he felt Ricky’s mouth on him, he groaned, relief and pleasure washing over him, and he thrust a little, hands pressed against the door.
It was exactly what he wanted. Ricky was slow and neat, head bobbing steadily, suction pulling on him. He watched, but it was too much for him, Ricky’s pretty lashes fanned out over flushed cheeks, Ricky’s wet, reddened lips, the obscenity of his erection thick in Ricky’s mouth. He couldn’t take it, and he panted up at the ceiling, groaning as pleasure mounted, as the erotic stimulation of Ricky’s rhythmic sucking drove him wild. “Fingers, put your fingers in me,” he gasped, fumbling with the lube. He wanted to feel it, he wanted to feel that sensation when he came.
Ricky took the lube from him, still sucking, not missing a beat. He couldn’t watch, couldn’t bear it, but he felt it, felt the slow push of Ricky’s fingers stroking into him. It was exactly what his body had needed, and he groaned, spreading his legs. A hot spasm of pleasure jolted him and his hips bucked, but Ricky rode with it, sucking his cock, fingers crowding up into him. “Gonna come, I’m going to come,” he moaned, one hand sinking into Ricky’s hair. “Keep, ah-ohhuhh, keep going, just like this, just - - oh! Oh! Oh!” The burst of climax was so intense, it felt sudden, felt shocking, rocking him to his foundation, and he shouted, his grip tightening on Ricky’s hair. The power of his ecstasy stunned him, and he just stood there, panting, amazed, while Ricky swallowed his cum. The stroking of Ricky’s fingers slowed, but no matter how gentle it was, the physical invasion of penetration was unmistakable, and he squirmed.
Ricky’s fingers slipped out of him, and when he looked down, Ricky smiled. “Can I fuck you?”
He thought about it, about the pleasure he’d just experienced, about what he wanted. “Okay,” he decided. “Yes, but face-to-face, I want to be on my back. And not too hard.”
“I know how you like it,” Ricky said, getting up. His hand ran over D.O.’s chest, warm through the cotton of D.O.’s t-shirt, and he pressed a light kiss to the corner of D.O.’s mouth. “You can trust me to make it nice.”
Suho was barely into Teen Top’s dorm before Sehun ran into the bedroom and slammed the door. Not staying for the apology, then.
“Hi,” Chunji said.
Behind Chunji, Changjo grinned, exactly as handsome and mischievous as Suho remembered.
Love flooded Suho’s heart. He wanted to throw both arms around Changjo and hold on. Lowering his head, he pretended to focus on taking off his shoes while he told himself to get a grip. “I need to apologize,” he said, straightening.
“Okay, sure,” Chunji said.
He told them how sorry he was, and how they’d take steps to prevent it from happening again. Chunji just nodded, holding his gaze, so he kept going. He could hear himself getting repetitive, but it was all sincere, and under Chunji’s cool, direct stare, he found himself exposing all of the burdens on his heart, talking about how guilty he felt, how responsible he was, how horrified he was to have jeopardized his precious sunbaes’ careers, how he didn’t deserve to be forgiven. He was still apologizing when Changjo broke in with, “Oh my god, stop! Hyung, you don’t have to say all of this.” Changjo elbowed Chunji. “Why didn’t you stop him?”
“What?” Chunji asked. “I couldn’t see anybody for a month, I couldn’t hang out with any of my friends, I couldn’t talk to Dongwoo hyung at all, and I had to put up with L.Joe begging for Oh Sehun Oh Sehun. He can apologize for that.”
“He said that he’s sorry. And he brought dinner from your favorite place. What else do you want?”
“Oh, good, I’m hungry,” Chunji said, reaching for the bags in Suho’s hands. “Go ahead, you can go, I forgive you.”
“He’s not angry,” Changjo said, taking Suho’s hand. “He’ll be over the whole thing by tomorrow.” He was already pulling Suho into his bedroom. Emotionally, Suho found it difficult to switch from penitently apologizing to suddenly being alone with him, but Suho’s body accepted the transition immediately. As soon as the door closed, they hugged, and it felt as good, as comfortable and sexy and fulfilling as it always had.
“Are you angry?” Suho asked.
“Not at you. Not at Xiumin hyung, either, not anymore. I’m angry at Westonic, but you don’t need to worry about them.”
That “not anymore” gave him a little jolt but also let him breathe easier. He didn’t want to think about what it would mean if Changjo had decided to hold a grudge. “Everyone’s too forgiving today.”
“You always want to be a martyr. I’m not going to play along.”
“I’m not a martyr.”
L.Joe’s voice rose from the next room. With one arm still around him, Changjo reached over and turned on music. Just under it, Suho could hear the TV come on in the front room. Good, the noise would cover any other sounds L.Joe made.
Any sounds Suho made.
Licking his lips, he eased away from Changjo. “How’ve you been? I’m sorry about-”
“You already apologized for that,” Changjo said, taking off his shirt and tossing it aside.
God, this maknae’s body was too handsome. That smooth skin, those hard pecs, Changjo looked ripe for sex. “I didn’t even say what it was,” Suho said, his gaze darting everywhere, his eyes going back again and again to Changjo’s half-naked body.
“You apologized for everything, I’m sure you covered it.” He undid his fly and sat down, bouncing slightly on his bed and reaching both hands out. “Come on, it’s been forever.”
“You had good advice earlier.”
“My advice is always terrific. I’m right about everything, you should know that by now.” He grabbed at the air, gesturing Suho closer. “We can talk about it while I take your clothes off.”
“Maknae!” So bold. “It was a good idea for me to go and see Sunggyu hyung in person. We talked over everything. And I got to apologize to all of his members in person, and talk to L.”
“Why is it important for you to explain all of this right now?” Changjo asked, hands dropping. His gaze was too alert, too intent, as it flashed over Suho. This maknae saw too much. “You’re working up to telling me something and it’s taking forever to get there. You’re too tense, is it bad news?”
“No, there’s nothing wrong,” Suho said, quick to reassure him. After the terrible month they’d all had, this was no time to alarm people with the possibility of bad news. “It’s fine.”
“It’s not bad, okay. You went to see Sunggyu hyung, you apologized to Infinite. You got laid. It’s something about that?” Changjo asked immediately, and Suho wondered what had just shown on his face to give it away. “You had sex with Sunggyu hyung, and it was great? You had sex with L hyung, and it was bad? Or it was too good? You did something new, a new position?”
“It was good,” Suho said, needing to break off the flow of guesses. “It was very good, all of it, but it was a lot, and I’m a little… I feel like…” Embarrassed, he came out with it. “I feel like if you touch me, I’ll do anything you want.”
“Oh.” Changjo smiled, then tried to hold back a snicker, then burst into laughter.
“Don’t laugh!” he objected, pushing at Changjo. Too quick for him, Changjo pulled him in, grabbing him around the waist, and in another second, he was on his back, on the bed. “Ya, maknae,” he tried to say, but his protest got caught in his throat, and all that came out was a breathless rush of syllables. He loved Changjo’s spirit, Changjo’s energy, Changjo’s audacity, and he loved being on his back under this dongsaeng. God, he’d missed this in so many ways.
“Don’t worry, I’ll only do things you like,” Changjo said. Desire thrumming through him, Suho ran his hands up Changjo’s muscular arms, need making his pulse flutter, pleasure already warm between his thighs. “Or we don’t have to do anything. Do you want to make out with me? If you’re really sure that you really want to, say yes. Or if you aren’t sure, you can say no, or say nothing, or ask about the weather. We can go eat, you brought food, do you want to eat?”
The weather was the last thing on his mind. “I want you to kiss me,” he confessed, stroking Changjo’s bare, taut skin. “I want you to make love to me. If you walk out of here to eat dinner, I don’t think I’ll be able to forgive you.”
Changjo grinned, taking Suho’s hand, guiding it to his fly. Reaching down the front of his pants, Suho stroked his big, satiny cock. Groaning, “Oh, god, maknae,” Suho felt a fierce spasm of need. Like none of that was going on, Changjo asked, “But what if I’m really hungry?”
There was no competition. “I’m hungrier,” Suho said, and kissed him.
Chen pulled Hoya into the room and locked the door. “No interruptions.”
“Then how will Grandpa-nim get in to see you?” Hoya asked.
Hoya smiled, touching his arm. “Okay.” Sitting on the bed, Hoya leaned back against the headboard. “New?”
Following Hoya’s gaze to a fan drawing of the whole group, Chen nodded. “It is. She made me look good, right?” Wanting to be close, he crawled onto the bed.
Cupping his hips, Hoya drew him in, good and close, right into his favorite position on top. Moaning, he ran his hands over Hoya’s chest, leaning in. “I think you’re pretty handsome already,” Hoya murmured, gaze on his mouth, then flicking up to his eyes.
He couldn’t believe that they were together again. It seemed too good to be true. “I missed you so much. Do you know how long it’s been since we sat together like this?”
Hoya cupped his jaw, thumb slipping over his lips. Their foreheads touched, and he wrapped his arms around Hoya’s shoulders, treasuring this closeness. “Thirty-seven days,” Hoya said, caressing his lower lip again. “But who’s counting.”
Hoya actually knew. Chen had kept track of the number of days, but he hadn’t realized that Hoya would, too. “Thank you for the ring. I’ve worn it every day. I wanted to thank you for it better when you gave it to me. There was so much I couldn’t say.”
“You looked happy to have it. That’s what I wanted.” Reaching behind himself, Hoya took Chen’s hand, unwinding Chen’s arm from around his neck and pulling it in between them. He looked down at the ring, rubbing his thumb over it. “Looks good.” Raising Chen’s hand to his mouth, he kissed it.
This hyung was so good to him, nothing could melt his heart like Hoya could. “I love you.”
He smiled a little, lips twitching, and kissed the back of Chen’s hand again. “That’s my line.”
“Well, I already said it. And I’m not taking it back.”
“I’ll have to say something else, then.” Hoya’s thumb skimmed over his cheekbone, then along his jaw. “I love you so much, Chen-ah. I love you, and I missed you every day. I thought about you, and I wanted to see you, and call you, and talk to you. I missed your smile, and the way you laugh, and how good, and kind, and steady you are. And my body missed you.” Hoya’s tongue flicked out, wetting his lips, and Chen’s breath caught. “My body missed you a lot.”
“Nothing seems as funny without you,” Chen whispered, tightening his arms around Hoya, their chests pressing together. “Nothing’s as sexy, either. You make me feel so good, and you make me so happy, and you make me laugh so much, and you turn me on so much, nothing seemed right without you. I missed you every, every day.”
“I’m here,” Hoya whispered, hand stroking his spine, a grounding, physical touch. “I’m with you.”
“We have to see each other thirty-seven times to make up for it,” he said, nuzzling Hoya’s cheek, his hand sliding over the back of Hoya’s neck. “You have to take me to dinner, and take me to the movies, and let me watch you dance. You have to joke with me and flirt with me and let me watch you dance.”
Hoya’s lips twitched in another smile. “Are you getting repetitive? I think you just said that one.”
“I really like to watch you dance,” Chen confessed, his fingers delving into Hoya’s hair.
“Thirty-seven dates,” Hoya said, kissing his jaw. “I’ll do it, I’ll make everything up to you.”
At that promise, he felt a pang of guilt. “It’s our fault, EXO’s fault. I should make it up to you.”
“No,” Hoya said, kissing along his jaw, towards his ear, light, slow kisses that sent sensual pleasure singing through him. “No, I’m the boyfriend, I’m the hyung. It’s my responsibility.” Hoya kissed his mouth, and he moaned, heat shuddering through him. Time spun lazily as they kissed, pleasure winding through him, their tongues stroking together. Hoya’s hands slid under his shirt, and he threaded his fingers through Hoya’s hair, ran his hands over Hoya’s chest, relishing the reality of Hoya, revisiting familiar terrain. His own cock hardened fast, responding enthusiastically, but it was the stiffness of Hoya’s cock that made him groan. Grinding against it, he kissed Hoya harder, and Hoya cupped his ass, urging him on. Escalating heat had him panting, kissing Hoya hungrily, and Hoya was pulling his shirt up, taking it off of him. As soon as it was out of the way, he went right back to Hoya’s mouth, and then Hoya’s hands were on his pants, undoing his fly. “Chen-ah,” Hoya breathed, and he lifted up, pushing his pants down, ready to give himself to Hoya however Hoya wanted him. “God, unh, Chen cock is the best cock,” Hoya moaned, pulling his underwear down, and he undulated, rubbing himself, needing it. He recognized the way Hoya stared at his erection, and when Hoya pulled him in and rolled him over, he was quick to cooperate, sliding onto his back.
No one gave head like Hoya did. “God, ooohhh, mmmm, oh!” With Hoya’s tongue snaking over his erection and Hoya’s hand on his balls, he was in heaven. “Ah, mmmm, hyung.” His whole body was humming, pleasure burning through him, lust an intensifying ache. “Damn, yes, yes.” Hoya sucked him steadily, hungrily, intent on his cock, and that single-minded focus made him feel like his cock was the sexiest, most delicious thing Hoya had ever tasted. Swallowing his cock over and over again, Hoya was moaning, hips rolling, and the sinuous, explicit movement turned him on so much he was groaning, dripping pre-cum into Hoya’s mouth. “So good, it’s so good.”
For a second, just a second, Hoya lifted up. Aching, Chen groaned, protesting, needing to be in his mouth again. “God, I missed this,” he panted, and he dove on again, sucking Chen down.
Chen had been remembering this, fantasizing about this, masturbating over thoughts of this, for weeks. Now that it was here, now that he could see Hoya’s pretty, pink lips stretched around his shaft, now that he could see Hoya’s quick, agile tongue dancing over his erection, now that he could feel that intense, skilled suction, the rhythm pulling him up toward paradise, he was in fiery, erotic bliss. Gasping, moaning, “So good, it’s so good,” like he could barely comprehend how fucking amazing it was, he writhed, trying to push deeper and deeper into Hoya’s mouth. When he came, he came hard, crying out like he was trying to show off, loud and ecstatic, bliss exploding in a frenzied burst.
Blitzed and trembling, he moaned unsteadily. Collapsing, boneless, he felt amazed that something so good could happen to him. There were a lot of wonderful things going on in his life, but the fact that Hoya was his boyfriend, and that Hoya happened to give unbelievable head, were some of the best. Whoa.
Hoya cleared his throat. “That needs to happen way more often.”
Yes. Yes, it did. God, he could still feel it, that lush pleasure sweeping him along. “I think so, too.”
Slow and sinuous, Hoya crawled up him. It made him so happy, he smiled foolishly, reaching out, tugging Hoya closer. Running a hand up his side, Hoya smiled back. “Anyone ever tell you that you have a gorgeous cock?”
He hummed happily, tugging at Hoya’s belt loops. “You’ve said it.”
“I’m a smart man.” Hoya kissed him, and he moaned, falling into it. This hyung, and the romance this hyung brought into his life, meant everything to him. Hoya made him feel so happy, so loved, so complete, he treasured every second they were together, every interaction.
As Hoya deepened the kiss, stroking his body, he coiled around Hoya, wrapping Hoya in his arms and legs. The move brought their lower bodies into contact. As soon as he felt the rigidity of Hoya’s erection, he moaned, thighs tightening their grip, his hips lifting as he rubbed himself against that hard length.
“Okay,” Hoya whispered, kissing him, grinding against him. “I’ll take care of you, Chen-ah.”
Embarrassed, he broke the kiss, trying to convince his thighs to unlock. “I’m too predictable.”
Hoya smiled, kissing him again. “You like what you like.”
“But you like what you like. You don’t have to do it just for me, I want you to have what you want. I’ll go down on you, I-”
“We have thirty-seven dates coming up. We have plenty of time to do everything we can think of.” Eyes twinkling, Hoya chuckled. “Chen-ah, you want it so badly I can practically feel your asshole sucking me in. Let me do this. Last time, you thought I was pretty good at it.”
“You’re amazing.” He pulled up Hoya’s shirt, and Hoya took it off, dropping it. “Have you been giving it to Sungjong? Has he been asking for it?”
“Some.” Hoya took his pants off, and Chen moaned, reaching for his cock. So erect, so hard, god, this was going to be amazing. “I’ve mostly - - ah, whoo, okay - - I’ve mostly - - maybe let go of it for a second.”
“Do you want me to roll over?” Whatever got that thing inside him sooner.
“No, this is good.” Hoya reached for the lube, and he scooted closer, pushing the pillow under his hips, pulling his knees up. “I’ve mostly been taking it nonstop. My members are fucking insatiable.”
“You’re insatiable,” Chen said.
Hoya blinked at that. “I am not.”
“That’s not what Woohyun hyung and Dongwoo hyung say.” Watching Hoya pour out lube, he felt a familiar, excited flutter of anticipation. Hoya was really going to fuck him.
“That tree is always full of shit.”
The slick nudge of Hoya’s fingertip made his back arch. Moaning, he tried to relax, cupping his balls out of the way. He felt it slide deeper, and he rested his calf on Hoya’s shoulder. “How long can you last, because I think I’m already getting my hopes up too high.”
“No, it’s okay. I figured you’d want it. L-” He cut himself off, suddenly coughing. “One of my members gave it to me and then sucked me dry before we came over here. I’m good.”
That was fantastic news. In so many ways. “I owe him so much.”
“Got me off three times,” Hoya murmured, kissing him. The flick of Hoya’s tongue over his lips made him moan, his hips rolling as Hoya eased another finger into him. “Think I can do that for you?”
“God, yes,” he moaned, tilting his head back as Hoya kissed his neck. “You won’t even have to try.”
“I want to make you feel good,” Hoya whispered, trailing soft kisses over his jaw, making pleasure pop inside of him. “It’s important to me, Chen-ah.”
“Oh, hyung.” Touched, he ran his thumb over Hoya’s cheek. “You make me feel amazing. You make me feel good in so many ways, not just with sex.”
Hoya’s mouth met his, plucking up slow, sensual kisses, and he moaned, loving it. When Hoya’s mouth broke away from his, he opened his eyes, and there was a glint of humor in Hoya’s expression. “But the sex is good, too, right?”
“Don’t tease,” he said breathlessly, pulling Hoya in for another kiss. “I’m already dying for it, just give it to me.”
Hoya kissed him again. “Okay, Chen-ah.” Another kiss, another, and he felt Hoya’s fingers slide out of him. His kisses were more demanding now, his need mounting; he’d gone without this hyung for too long, and he couldn’t wait anymore. “I’ve got you,” Hoya whispered, and he felt Hoya’s thick cockhead pressing into him.
Yes, god, yes. “Oh, hh-uohhh, oh, fuck,” he moaned, his toes curling. Hoya grunted, sliding deep, and just as he was getting used to being filled with hard cock, Hoya shifted, rocking into him. Pleasure hit him in successive bursts, one after another, as Hoya built an ecstatic rhythm in his body. The powerful eroticism of Hoya’s movements, the steady, forceful rolling of Hoya’s hips, was beautiful, obscene, graceful. Pleasure built in him so immediately, so intensely, that he felt suffused with it, felt it light up every cell. He felt like he’d been made for this, made for sexual ecstasy, built to make love with Hoya.
Holding on, dragging his hands over Hoya’s thighs, he gazed up into Hoya’s eyes. Hoya’s expression was open, unguarded, Hoya’s gaze on his face, watching him. Thrusting into him, rocking him, Hoya stroked the side of his face, thumb sweeping over his eyebrow and whisking sweat from his temple. “I love you,” Hoya said, and he didn’t just hear it, he felt it, in his heart, in the core of him. It doubled his pleasure, intensified the passion between them. Hoya’s hand was on his erection, stroking him, ecstasy rising swift and strong, and then Hoya said it again, “I love you, Chen-ah, I love you so much,” and he was coming, groaning, trembling, climaxing urgently, spurting as suddenly in Hoya’s hand as if it were as simple as pressing the right button. He moaned fervently, shaken by ecstasy, and then he moaned again, blissful, running his hands over Hoya’s chest, thumbs flicking over Hoya’s hard nipples.
“I love you, too,” he said, moaning in between words, humming, feeling drunk. “Damn, you’re good at this.”
Sehun fucked his pet slowly. Under him, L.Joe whimpered, masturbating. He’d done what he’d needed to do; this was his pet’s time, now, a reward for submission and obedience and good behavior. He didn’t kiss or touch very much, just let L.Joe feel him inside, just let L.Joe be close to him.
L.Joe came a second time, whispering, “Thank you, Sehun-ah, thank you, thank you.” His pet’s gratitude turned him on, and he sped up a little. It was hard to resist the urge to be rough, to take advantage, to prove to both of them that he could do whatever he wanted here. Excited by his own power, by L.Joe’s adoration of him, he came hard. As orgasm hit, he pushed balls-deep, shooting his load as far inside L.Joe as he could.
When he pulled out, L.Joe whined miserably, arms coiling around him. That was a huge liberty to take, but he allowed it. He hugged L.Joe, rolling onto his side.