K-pop info and glossary
Teen Top
Debut: 2010, Top Media (first group to debut under Top Media, a company started by Andy from Shinhwa)
Fan club: Angel
Name Real name Birth date Role
C.A.P Bang Minsoo November 4, 1992 leader, rapper
Chunji Lee Chanhee October 5, 1993 lead singer, visual
L.Joe Lee Byunghun November 23, 1993 rapper
Niel Ahn Daniel August 16, 1994 main vocal
Ricky Yoo Changhyun February 27, 1995 visual, fake maknae
Changjo Choi Jonghyun November 16, 1995 maknae, dancer
I write about men having sex with other men.  You must be eighteen or older to read my fiction.  This site is for consenting, responsible adults only.


            The sharp cry arrested all action in the dressing room.  Even C.A.P. froze.  While Niel stared around at the other members, trying to determine the guilty party so that he’d know who to turn on first, and Changjo silently shrank down in his seat to make himself smaller, Ricky made the mistake of looking directly at Chunji.

            He couldn’t help it.  It was automatic by now; it was where his gaze wanted to be.  He’d been having trouble keeping his eyes on his own game and not on Chunji, but it seemed weird to sit around watching Chunji play games, so he’d done his best not to stare.  He knew that in essence he was just watching Chunji tap at a phone screen, but it was annoyingly fascinating.

            The faces Chunji made while he gamed were the best.  His triumphant smirk was so smugly victorious, it kind of turned Ricky on.  His focused look of determination, nostrils flaring, was great.  His angry, disbelieving glare when he was losing was the best, especially when he started muttering, “No, no, no,” under his breath.  His body language was great.  Sometimes he’d lean back and put his feet up - - when he put his feet on Ricky, it was absolutely perfect - - and sometimes he’d lean forward to concentrate.  Sometimes he’d squirm, shifting around in his seat like he was trying to force the win with his body, and he looked so lithe and agile that Ricky wanted to sit on his lap and feel that writhing up close and personal.

            But he was Chunji, so if he caught Ricky staring, he’d laugh and ask about it, and then Ricky had to come up with some excuse, and of course he never bought it, and then things got weird, and the only thing worse than Chunji not noticing Ricky at all were the times when Chunji thought that he was weird, because then Chunji got that, “Ugh, this awkward kid,” expression on his face, and Ricky got so hurt and frustrated that it was harder and harder to get over it every time.  Nothing could ruin Ricky’s day as fast as that look on Chunji’s face.

            Chunji stared around the room, glaring.  “Who’s been playing on my phone?”

            Apparently determining that nothing was going on, C.A.P. crossed his arms over his chest and closed his eyes for naptime.  “Not me,” L.Joe said quickly.

            Oh.  Was that, uh.  Ricky tried not to look guilty.

            “Ya, Ricky!  Was it you?” Chunji demanded.

            Shit.  He was going to have to work on not looking guilty.  “You weren’t using it,” he explained.  “And our manager hyung had mine.  I didn’t do anything to it!  I didn’t call anybody.”  He might have taken a selca or two, for fun, but this didn’t seem like the best time to mention it.

            Chunji frowned at him.  “Why are your scores better than mine?”

            Niel laughed.  “Is he better at your games than you are?”

            “Ya, shut up if you want to live,” Chunji told Niel.  He looked at Ricky and jerked his chin in brusque invitation.  “Come here, show me what you did.”

            Relieved not to be in trouble, Ricky got up and sat beside him on the couch.  They were made up for their performance, so Chunji looked immaculately airbrushed, his black lashes long and lush, his mouth soft and red.  “The, uh, racing game?” Ricky asked, distracted by his nearness.  It was incredibly inconvenient to be so affected just by the sight of Chunji, just by proximity, since Ricky’s current lifestyle involved being around Chunji twenty-four hours a day.

            “Yes.  What did you do?  Your score’s, like, three times mine.”

            “Since when is Ricky a good driver?” L.Joe asked.  Changjo snickered and Ricky made a threatening motion until he stopped.

            “Here, do this.”  Chunji shoved the phone into his hands.

            “It’s just, it’s not hard, hyung.”  Ricky started a race.  With a sniff, Chunji leaned in, pressing against his shoulder and down his side.  He could smell the expensive cologne Angel had given Chunji, and it reminded him of Chunji’s sheets.  Chunji’s bed smelled like that cologne and Chunji’s soap and Chunji’s musk, and that association flipped a switch in Ricky’s brain, and all of a sudden it was really difficult to focus on the game because all he could think about was Chunji’s scent, Chunji’s bed, Chunji, sex, Chunji, sex with Chunji.  Chunji’s lean, sinewy body, naked underneath him.  Chunji’s black pubes and sexy cock.  Chunji’s hand between his legs, Chunji’s flirtatious, inviting smile.

            “What are you doing?”  Chunji leaned away from him again, laughing.  “What’s this, your score’s worse than mine, now!”

            Shit.  Now Chunji was going to give him a, “Aish, this kid,” look.  Refusing to see it, unwilling to let that happen, he said, “I was thinking of something else.  I’ll try again.”  With a shake of the head, he cleared his mind, furrowing his brow and concentrating on the game.  He was good at this game, he could do this, he could prove himself.

            Chunji leaned in again, using his shoulder for an armrest.

            Staring at the screen, Ricky willed himself through the game, his car rounding the curves smoothly, dodging obstacles cleanly, zooming to the end.  When he crossed the finish line and his score lit up the screen, he smiled, satisfied, and looked at Chunji.  “That’s how you do it.”

            “Hunh.”  Chunji’s fingers prodded his thigh.  “But how’d you get past the blazing barrels without losing points?  I always bump into at least one of them.”

            “The barrels?”  He started the game again.  “If you speed up fast enough, the fire goes out when you zoom past them, and you can just go through.  If you slow down and try to get past carefully, it won’t help.”

            “Wait, I should go faster?”

            “Yeah, it’s like this.”  Ricky sped up around the turn and sent his car screaming between barrels.  The flames vanished and he passed through unscathed.  “See?”

            “Well, shit.  How did you know that?  Are you looking up cheats?”

            “I just tried it.”

            “It’s like a philosophy on life,” Niel said.  “Go for what you want!  Speed up, zoom ahead without slowing down!  If you’re too careful, you won’t survive.”

            Laughing, Chunji asked, “What?” and L.Joe kicked lightly at Niel’s chair.

            “It’s Ricky’s approach to life!  Look how far it got him!” Niel exclaimed.

            “No, it’s not,” Chunji said.

            “How far who got where?” L.Joe asked, laughing.  “Aren’t we all in the same place?”

            “But Ricky got there two years before you did,” Changjo said.  “Doesn’t that make him more successful?  When you were his age, you weren’t this great.”

            “Ya!”  Chunji hurled a throw pillow at Changjo while L.Joe pounced on top of him.  Changjo was trying to duck L.Joe’s blows when their manager came in and told them it was time to get onstage.

            They were halfway through the interview when, “Which member has changed the most since debut?” came up.  Ricky tried not to roll his eyes; it wasn’t polite to seem disgusted in the interviewer’s face.  While his hyungs tripped over themselves to explain how grown up Changjo was lately, he waited for it to be over.

            It wasn’t fair to be bitter.  He didn’t take it out on Changjo or anything.  He got as much of a kick out of Changjo’s transformation from round-cheeked little kid to broad-shouldered, muscular adult as anyone did.  It was just that he, in comparison, had looked pretty much the same since forever.  While fans swooned for the ripped, sexy maknae, Chunji kept asking when it was going to be Ricky’s turn to grow up.  Ricky usually turned it around by pointing out how nice it was to look young forever, implying that Chunji wasn’t aging well, but that only led to threats and punching.

            If he looked older, Chunji might take him more seriously.  But Chunji looked at him and only saw some foolish dongsaeng.  He worked as hard as anyone else, and he accepted responsibility, and he acted mature when his hyungs were being ridiculous, but all Chunji remembered were the stupid things he did, his complaints, the moments when he was lazy or silly.

            He didn’t know how to get Chunji to think of him as a man, as a person, as someone to take seriously, and not some cute, annoying kid.

            There was only one part of him that Chunji was interested in.  Leave it to Chunji to choose the best, worst part of all.

            “Oh, my god.”  Ricky leaned against the thick pole in the middle of the practice room, panting and exhausted.

            “Break, I need a break,” L.Joe gasped, collapsing on the floor.

            “Water,” Chunji said, sagging against the wall.  “Bed.  New legs, I need a different pair of legs, these don’t work anymore.”

            “What are we doing?” Niel asked, sprawling beside L.Joe.  “Why are we doing this?  Let’s not do this anymore.  Let’s stop.  Let’s not be idols anymore, let’s do something easier.”

            “Like what?” C.A.P. asked.

            “Anything is easier than this,” L.Joe said.  “Lawyers, doctors.  Astrophysicists, let’s be astrophysicists from now on.”

            “We can stop once you get it right,” Changjo said.

            Chunji moaned, sliding down to the floor.  “We’ll be here for the rest of our lives.”

            “Not my fault,” Changjo said.

            “Not my fault,” Niel said quickly.

            Changjo snorted.  “Don’t joke, hyung.”

            “Ricky’s got it,” C.A.P. said.

            Ricky rubbed his thighs.  “Does that mean that I can go?”

            “That means that we can break into teams and go over it from the beginning,” Changjo said.  “I’ll teach Niel hyung and L.Joe hyung.  You can teach C.A.P. hyung and Chunji hyung.”

            There was a lot of grumbling, but Ricky didn’t mind so much.  While Changjo took the other two hyungs to the far end of the room, Ricky stood with Chunji and C.A.P.  After a few minutes, their manager called C.A.P. out of the room, so Ricky was left with Chunji.

            They did the moves together, side-by-side, watching the mirror.  It wasn’t the sexiest situation - - they were working, they were tired, everyone in the room looked like a sweaty mess - - but Ricky liked it, anyway.  He liked being one-on-one with Chunji, focused on only each other without distractions.  He liked the way Chunji’s expression cleared out when Chunji concentrated on learning, mouth relaxed, eyes focused.  He liked having an excuse to study Chunji’s body, to watch the details of Chunji’s movements, to touch Chunji wherever he wanted.

            Well, not exactly anywhere he wanted, but.  Still.  It was nice.

            “Hyung, no,” he said, shaking his head.  “You have to step back in between.  One, two, back, four.”  He demonstrated.  “You’re doing a weird side shuffle thing, it’s not like that.”

            For an instant, Chunji’s expression bordered on, “I am going to set this world on fire and never regret it for an instant.”  Familiar with that look, Ricky waited.  Getting over it, Chunji shook his head and laughed in exasperation.  “Why are you so good at this?  What are you doing that I’m not doing?”

            Um…  Ricky raised his eyebrows.  “You’re not stepping back on three, hyung.”

            Laughing, Chunji shoved him into the mirrored wall.  “Ya!  Can we switch teachers?”

            “No, I’m finally getting it,” L.Joe said.

            Making annoyed sounds, Chunji pulled off his sweatshirt.  With a wince at his reflection, he tried to finger-comb his hair into place.

            “I don’t think that’s going to help you dance any better,” Ricky said, just to provoke him.

            The squeeze of Chunji’s hand closing over his throat should have convinced him not to say things like that, but with Chunji suddenly right in his face and pressed against him and staring into his eyes, it was hard to regret it.

            “Sorry, I’m sorry, hyung!  I didn’t mean it,” he lied, cringing.  “I didn’t mean it, hyung, you’re a great dancer.  You dance so well, Chunji hyung.”

            Chunji’s smile warned him that he was in danger, and then he felt Chunji’s knee between his legs.

            Oh, god.  Chunji’s knees were deadly sharp.  “You’re the best dancer, the best,” he insisted desperately.  “You’re so talented, hyung, you’re the best singer, so handsome, everything.”

            Chunji’s knee pressed upward just enough to put him in danger.  “Sure about that?”

            “Yes, yes.”  He clutched at Chunji, and when he rose onto his toes to rescue himself, Chunji’s knee followed, exerting pressure.  “Oh, shit, yes, hyung, you’re the best, so handsome, so talented, so sexy, I love you.”  Oh, god, what was wrong with him, this was turning him on.  His balls should have been escaping into his body for safety, but his stupid body was having the complete opposite reaction and getting all excited.  His cheeks burned helplessly as his cock hardened.

            “I.”  Chunji stopped talking and laughed.  Looked down between their bodies.  Met his eyes, one eyebrow raised.  “What are you doing?”

            “Don’t talk about it,” Ricky mumbled, humiliated.

            Smirking, Chunji rubbed his thigh against Ricky’s cock.

            Oh, god, it felt so good.  Moaning, Ricky pushed at Chunji’s chest, trying to fend him off.  “Don’t, please, hyung, be nice.”

            “This isn’t nice?”  Chunji did it again, pinning him against the wall.  “Looks like it feels nice.”

            Moaning, dying of embarrassment, burning with need, Ricky shuddered as pleasure throbbed between his legs.  “Chunji hyung, don’t.”

            “Stop molesting the maknae,” Niel said.  “We’re not supposed to bother him when he’s like this.”

            “I’m helping him,” Chunji protested, backing off and letting go.  “What’s wrong with it if he likes it?”

            “Aish, again?” L.Joe asked as Ricky cupped his hard-on and tried to blend into the wall.  “I know I get turned on by every little thing, but come on, Ricky-ya, you have some sort of problem.”

            “Really, it gets hard eighty times a day,” Chunji said.

            “That’s like, a lot of times in one hour,” Niel said.

            “I think he’s just showing off,” Changjo said.

            Chunji laughed.  “Ya, then can we see it?”

            “Who wants to look at it?” Niel demanded.  “Don’t be gross.”

            “How is it gross?” L.Joe asked.  “It’s only a cock, you have one, too.”

            “Come on.”  Chunji was poking at him, prodding his ribs, tugging at his shirt.  “Show it to us.”

            His body couldn’t calm down - - it never could, when Chunji did this to him, god, the press and slide of Chunji’s thigh felt incredible - - and his hard-on was still throbbing and he was trying to cover it up, trying to find a way to become one with the mirror and disappear from the room, wishing that everyone would just shut up and go away.  He was turned on, and he was miserable, and he wanted to beg Chunji to touch it again, and he wanted to hate Chunji for treating him like this.  Chunji couldn’t even take him seriously when it came to this.

            He did get hard all of the time - - and he especially got hard around Chunji, which was why Chunji was so aware of how often it happened - - and Chunji liked it, which would have been the best thing ever to happen to him if it had meant that Chunji liked him.  But Chunji didn’t like him; Chunji wasn’t interested in him.  Chunji liked his cock.  That was the part of him that Chunji liked best, except even that couldn’t get Chunji to think of him as a man or treat him like a sexual equal.  He was still just a kid in Chunji’s eyes, a kid playing around with an adult’s cock.  It was horrible.

            “I don’t want to see it,” Niel said.  “I’ve seen it too many times.  It gives me nightmares of this huge sausage chasing me around.”

            “Do you need therapy?” L.Joe asked.

            Chunji tugged at Ricky’s shorts.  “You’re not going to show it?”

            “No!” he exclaimed, shying away.  “We’re practicing, hyung, we should focus on that.”  He dared to meet Chunji’s eyes.  “Doesn’t it embarrass you to like my cock so much?”

            “What?” Chunji asked, laughing.  “It’s cute!”  Giving Ricky a once-over, he smirked.  “Cuter than the rest of you, anyway.”

            Swallowing, Ricky thought about punching him.

            C.A.P. came in a moment later and ordered everyone back to practice; soon Ricky was back to dancing and sweating, and his cock lost interest.  But his heart felt bruised for the rest of the night.

            Seated on the dorm floor, Ricky was eating instant ramen and trying to stay awake long enough to finish chewing.  His eyes were slipping shut when someone squatted down beside him, arm around his shoulders.  “Chunji hyung,” he mumbled, head nodding.

            “Ya, wake up.”  Chunji tapped his chin upward.  Blinking, it took him a moment to make sense of what he was looking at.  Chunji’s phone was in front of his face.  Onscreen was a photo of him.  Oh, yeah, he’d taken selcas with Chunji’s phone.  “What’s this?”

            Ricky woke up quickly; with a quick head shake, he became alert.  Chunji’s tone was conversational, not annoyed.  That didn’t necessarily mean anything good, though; sometimes Chunji’s worst anger was masked by a cool, breezy tone.  His eyes darted to the side as he tried to read Chunji’s expression, but Chunji was so close that all he saw was a smooth jawline.  He wished that he could kiss Chunji there.  “Selca.”

            “You’re taking selcas with my phone these days?”

            “Just once.”

            “Mmm.”  Chunji picked up Ricky’s phone and walked away with it.

            Uh, “Chunji hyung?”  Hastily scarfing down another mouthful of ramen, Ricky carried the bowl, hurrying after him.  “Hyung, wait, I need that.”

            “I’ll give it back.”  Chunji sat on his bed, reclining and holding up the phone.  “Was it like this?”

            Ricky chewed and swallowed.  “What are you doing?”  Chunji wasn’t damaging his phone or anything, so he decided not to panic.

            “You think I want photos of you all over my phone, right?  Then you must want photos of me all over your phone.”  Biting his lip, Chunji gave the phone a saucy wink.  It was one of his sexiest looks; it always made Ricky’s knees weak.  “Oh, I like that one,” he decided, studying the phone.  “Home screen!  Now, lock screen.”

            “Wait, you can’t,” Ricky said, surprised.  Then he stopped.  Why was he objecting?  This way, he got sexy photos of Chunji he could look at whenever he wanted, and no one could make fun of him for it.

            “How else did you pose?”  Chunji wasn’t really asking, so Ricky didn’t bother to answer.  Leaning back against his pillow, he tucked his hand behind his head.  Angling the phone, he smoldered.  Damn, Ricky loved how well he did that on command.  As soon as the photo was taken, he smiled cheerfully.  “Lock screen!”

            “You can’t,” Ricky said again.  He didn’t even manage to sound half-hearted.

            “Stop whining.”  Sitting up, Chunji tossed over Ricky’s phone.  Ricky fumbled to catch it without dropping the ramen.  “And stop using my phone.”

            Clutching his phone and bowl, Ricky left.  As soon as he had a moment of privacy - - which wasn’t until half of the members were asleep and he was locked in the bathroom alone - - he looked at Chunji’s photos.

            Shit.  Right there, as soon as he turned on his phone, Chunji gazed at him, right at him, sexy, smoldering, silently promising to do very bad things in very good ways.  He’d seen Chunji shoot that look at cameras, at crowds, at Angel, but this one was at him, all for him.  He could just imagine Chunji leaning back and looking at him this way, challenging him, beckoning him, daring him.  Naked.  Wanting him.  Ready to rock his world.

            Jacking off in the bathroom to a photo of Chunji wasn’t Ricky’s proudest moment, but it made a nice change from jacking off solely to fantasies and memories.  When he’d cleaned up and tucked his cock away, he turned to the home screen.

            Flirtatious, inviting, Chunji winked at him.  Melting, yearning, Ricky sank down to sit on the edge of the toilet.  Aw, Chunji.  Wishing, feeling wistful and stupid and really just in love, Ricky rubbed at his chest, gazing at the screen.  It would be nice if he didn’t have these stupid, mixed-up feelings about his hyung.  It would be even nicer if Chunji had any of them back.

            He sat there for a while.  He didn’t often have opportunities to love Chunji in peace.  There were always interruptions or distractions.  There were always too many opportunities for embarrassment, getting caught, being questioned.  It was nice, to have a moment all to himself where he could enjoy loving Chunji.  Okay, so it was painful and shameful and lonely to do it with a photograph on a phone in a dirty bathroom, but, shit, he worked with what he had.

            Finally, sleepy and kind of sad, kind of content, Ricky got up.  He really had to stop acting like this.  He had to let go of Chunji and get over it.  He had to cut this crush off now, before he did something stupid.  He didn’t want Chunji to find out, and he didn’t want to get hurt, and he didn’t want to mess up things inside the group, so he had to quit being so horny and sappy.

            That resolution lasted for as long as it took him to walk from the bathroom to the couch, where Chunji was fast asleep, looking like a rumpled angel.  At the sight, Ricky smiled happily and helplessly.  Ah, damn it.  Getting over this hyung wasn’t possible.

            He stood there for a moment, just looking.  Thinking about how nice it would be if Chunji woke up and smiled at him.  His gaze roamed and lingered; there was so much to look at.  The long black fringe of Chunji’s lashes.  The smooth skin of Chunji’s cheek.  The relaxed pout of those soft, pink lips, so tempting that Ricky had to kneel down, wanting to be closer.  The inviting silk of Chunji’s long neck, the perfect place to leave intimate kisses.  The long, lithe lines of Chunji’s body.  The soft cotton of his T-shirt was probably warm against his skin.  His shorts exposed so much, taut, creamy skin, Ricky wanted to nuzzle his muscular thigh.

            Ricky didn’t want him to wake up and scold, or say something sarcastic, or go to his room and leave Ricky behind.  Silent, still Chunji wasn’t as good as talkative, teasing, sexy Chunji, but it was better than no Chunji at all, so Ricky stayed in the moment, not waking him just yet, sitting down and leaning comfortably against the sofa and simply watching him sleep.

            The next thing Ricky knew, someone was jostling his shoulder and smacking him in the back of the head.  “Ya!”  Disoriented, he rubbed his head and frowned.  “What are you doing, get up.”  Why was he sitting on the floor and why was Chunji bothering him?  Oh, right.  Catching on, Ricky barely had time to duck as Chunji climbed over him to get up.  “Why would you let me sleep here?  Go to bed!”

            “I.”  Embarrassed, Ricky didn’t know what to say.  “You looked like you didn’t want to be interrupted.”

            “You thought that I wanted to sleep on the couch all night?”  Reaching down, Chunji grabbed his hand and hauled him up.

            On his feet, he ruffled his hair, smoothed it down again, and eyed Chunji uncertainly, wishing that he knew what to say.  “You looked peaceful.”

            “Peaceful,” Chunji repeated.  Augh, there was that awful look, that condescending “ugh, this kid” look that hurt worse than a kick in the balls.  Chunji shook his head and pushed at Ricky’s chest.  “Go to bed.”

            Frustrated, Ricky watched Chunji walk away.  He wanted to yell, but it would all be a waste.  Chunji wouldn’t ever take him seriously.  Chunji wouldn’t ever look at him and not see a stubborn kid.  Getting hurt was pointless; trying to change it was hopeless.

            He was crawling into bed when he remembered that stupid thing that Niel had said.  About how his approach to the racing game was like his approach to life.  Something about speeding up and going for what he wanted, not being too careful.

            He’d reached some of the best moments of his life by being bold, persistent, and confident.  Most things could be accomplished through hard work, but he fueled his hard work with belief in his own abilities.  He wasn’t a coward or a quitter.

            Sitting up in bed, he thought hard, his brows drawing together.

            Chunji hadn’t rejected him.  Not really.  Chunji hadn’t had the chance to reject him yet, because Chunji hadn’t even considered him yet.  He had to get Chunji to think about him and to see him in a new light.

            He just had to figure out how.

            Ricky was half-asleep on a chair in the dressing room when he heard Chunji ask, “What’s up with the maknae?”

            “He’s out with Niel getting drinks,” C.A.P. said.

            “No, the other one.  He’s been glaring at everybody with that weird ‘I’m going to make this happen’ look on his face all day.  It’s freaking me out.”

            “Eh, don’t worry about it,” C.A.P. said lazily.  “Let him have his weird little fun.”

            Weird little fun!  “Ya!” Ricky exclaimed, sitting up.  Startled, laughing, his hyungs scattered.

            Having photos of Chunji - - sexy, sexy Chunji - - on his phone was like constantly having a present to open right in his pocket.  He checked and re-checked his phone all day long.  He amused himself with internal debates over whether smoldering Chunji or winking Chunji was his favorite.  He took painstaking care to rearrange his apps and icons over and over again so that he could best showcase Chunji in the background.  To other people, it looked like he was just messing with his phone, playing a game or something, so they left him alone while really he was admiring Chunji.

            And then he’d look up and see the real Chunji, the real thing, seated across the room or laughing at L.Joe or standing right in front of him, and damn.  Chunji dazzled his eyes and took his breath away.  Stupid, sexy, gorgeous hyung.

            After his shower that night, he danced around the dorm with Changjo and Niel.  Chunji told them to shut up and stop being annoying, and then joined in, dancing with them.  Eventually, laughing, tired, he flopped across his bed, Changjo landing heavily on his feet, Chunji across his middle, Niel on the other bed.  He kicked at Changjo, and Changjo tried to twist his toes off, and while they were kicking and quarreling, Chunji smacked his thigh and said, “Stop it,” and settled against him more comfortably, using his ribcage for a pillow.  The four of them rested and talked and did nothing for a while.  He ran his fingers through Chunji’s hair, and Chunji actually let him, which was kind of a miracle.  Treasuring the contact, he petted Chunji carefully.  Such soft, soft hair.

            After Chunji left and Ricky was going to sleep, he found Chunji’s phone in his bed.  He held it in his hands for a moment, thought about it, moved toward the door, thought some more, and decided to do whatever he wanted.  Why not be bold?  Why not be audacious and foolish?  What was the worst that could happen?  So he took off his shirt and leaned his shoulder against the wall.

            Changjo asked, “What are you doing?”

            “Nothing.”  One shoulder up, one hand in his pocket, he raised an eyebrow and pouted at the phone.  Taking a look at the photo, he smiled at himself.  Not bad.  Ruffling his hand through his hair, he considered other poses.

            “Isn’t that Chunji hyung’s phone?”

            He looked around the room, weighing his options.  Then he smiled at Changjo.  “Maybe.”

            Changjo laughed.  “Why is your shirt off?”

            “It’s nothing Chunji hyung hasn’t seen before.”  He leaned his shoulder blades against the wall, his hips canted forward, and tried to smolder.

            “Here, here.”  Changjo stepped in and tousled his hair.  “Do that thing with your eyebrows.  Yes!  Also…”  Changjo pinched his nipples, hard.  Squeaking, he smacked at Changjo’s hands, kicking Changjo away from him.  “You have to make them look good!”

            “They look fine!”  Focusing his attention, he took the photo.

            “Let me see, let me see.”  Crowding in, Changjo leaned over his shoulder.  “Ah, sexy.”

            “Oh, I look weird.”  It was uncomfortable, seeing himself look like that.  Like some drama actor in a magazine spread.

            “What’s weird?”  Changjo laughed.  “You look like you know how to screw.”

            Hey!  “I do know how to screw!” he argued, whapping Changjo.

            Scurrying, Changjo ducked out of reach.  “Well, now you actually look like it!”

            Giving up on Changjo, Ricky studied his photos again.  He wondered if this was what Chunji looked for in guys.  He wondered if Chunji would notice it in him.

            Carefully, he set Chunji’s phone in the kitchen before he went to bed.

            A couple of days later, while the other members slept in the van, he turned on his phone to check the weather - - to look at Chunji - - and he was so startled that he almost dropped his phone.  The lock screen had a new photo.  “Oh my god.”  Right there on his phone, Chunji smiled at him.

            Seated against a wall, knees up, Chunji was naked to the waist.  His hair was tousled and he smiled like he’d just spotted someone he wanted to take home for the night.  His brown eyes sparkled with sexual promise, and his smooth, bare skin looked so tempting, so sexy, that Ricky was already turned on.  Oh, god, how could he put something like this on Ricky’s phone?

            Sexy, it was so sexy, god.  Hot, flustered, Ricky turned his phone facedown for a moment, swallowing, hoping that no one had seen.  Had Chunji changed the home screen, too?

            Quickly, he glanced around at the other members.  Everyone slept.  Okay.  Hurriedly, guiltily, he took another look at shirtless, smiling Chunji and then flipped past that shot to the home screen.

            “Oh my god, oh my god.”  Ricky fumbled with his phone, pushing it away, staring at it again, turning it off, even more quickly turning it back on.  With thrilled, eager eyes he devoured this new shot of Chunji.

            Still shirtless and tousled, Chunji leaned toward the camera with a leer, tongue out, fly unbuttoned.  The way he licked the air seemed impossibly lewd, and the glint in his eyes was pure sex.  He was raking his nails over his skin; a faint row of red marks trailed behind his fingers across his chest.  This wasn’t just Chunji being sexy; there was just enough aggression in this photo to give Ricky’s whole body a thrill.

            Turned on, Ricky stared at the photo while his mind raced.  He was used to Chunji being sexy - - it was a regular, exciting, fantastic, excruciating part of his life - - but he didn’t remember seeing this side of Chunji before.  It lit up whole new parts of his imagination.  What if Chunji was aggressive in bed?  What if Chunji got aggressive on him?  What if Chunji wanted to lick and scratch him?  Oh, god, that would be the best thing in the world!

            Wincing, squirming, Ricky rubbed himself through his pants.  He wished that-

            “What are you doing?” Chunji mumbled, elbowing him and then smacking his leg.  “Hold still.”

            Shit.  Shit, shit!  Ricky pawed frantically at his phone, turning it off and hiding it between himself and Niel.  “Nothing.  Sleeping.”  He dared to look at Chunji, only to find out that Chunji was eyeing his lap with amusement.  Embarrassed, he tried to cover himself, but Chunji pushed his hands away.

            Looking like he wanted to laugh, Chunji asked, “Are you turned on?  What were you doing, looking at porn again?  You shouldn’t do that on your phone.”

            “I’m not, I wasn’t.”

            “Look at that tent, animals could live in there.  Let me see it.”

            “No!”  Ricky tried to cover himself, Chunji smacked at his hands, and he slapped at Chunji’s hands.

            “Ya!  Chunji!” their manager called from the front seat.  “Enough!”

            “Yes, sorry.”  Chunji tossed his hair.  Sniffed.  Looked out the window.

            Relieved, Ricky relaxed.  Now that it was over, though, he wished that they hadn’t been interrupted.  As horrible as Chunji’s interest in his cock was, it was interest in his cock.  One of the reasons he got so hard around Chunji so often was that it got him attention, and his body loved the attention.  Most of his sexual fantasies revolved around Chunji noticing his hard-on and touching it and then escalating from there, and that was how his sexual reality went, too.

            Their manager tended to discourage it, but when he wasn’t around, Chun-

            Whoa, oh.  Chunji’s hand was sliding over his stomach and, shit, rubbing right down over his hard-on.  “Hyung,” he whispered.  He didn’t want to tell Chunji to stop, but it would be too embarrassing to ask for more, so he shut up.

            “Uhh, so hard,” Chunji whispered, feeling him up.  “God, you’re such a horny little pig.”

            “I’m not a pig,” he whispered back indignantly, and then he made a desperate little moaning sound like a choked-off whimper as the heel of Chunji’s hand rode along his shaft.  Fuck, that felt good.

            “Shut up,” Chunji whispered.  “Don’t get me in trouble.”

            He wouldn’t - - he didn’t - - oh, god.  Chunji was opening his fly.  “Okay, hyung, okay,” he whispered, so excited that he squirmed, digging his nails into Chunji’s thigh.  He loved - - hated - - loved it when Chunji touched him like this.  It was the best, it felt amazing, it turned him on like nothing else when Chunji fondled his cock.  It was excruciating; the incredible part was how fantastic it felt, how hard it got him, but the unbearable part was when it ended, when Chunji stopped, and he was still hard, and he just had to deal with it.  Chunji never actually got him off, just played with his cock and teased him for being so horny and told him what a nice cock he had, and then stopped, cold as ice, and left him right on the edge of orgasm like some horrible torment.  It was the worst, it was awful, but what could he do?  He loved it when Chunji fondled his cock, it was better than sex because it was Chunji.  He couldn’t get Chunji to get him off, and he definitely didn’t want Chunji to stop altogether and not touch him in the first place, so he dealt with it.  He suffered the joys and the frustrations of it and tried to pretend that as soon as it stopped happening he stopped caring about it, like it wasn’t the most thrilling cocktease he’d ever imagined, like it wasn’t all he thought about when he was alone.

            “Squirmy little pig,” Chunji whispered, fingers sliding inside the front of his underwear.  When he felt Chunji’s hand brush the taut, sensitive, bare skin of his cock, he bit his lip, squeezing his eyes shut, trying not to groan.  Immediately, he opened his eyes again, wanting to watch, needing to see.  Chunji pushed his underwear down just enough for his erection to spring upward, then scooped his balls out, rubbing them.

            Oh, god, it was like nothing else in his life.  Throbbing pleasure radiated through him, a line of pure ecstasy shooting from his crotch to his brain at the speed of light and then pulsing, zinging over and over and over again while he gasped and writhed.  Chunji’s fingers had a way of finding spots he could never find on his own, hitting pleasure zones like there was some kind of cheat code to his body that only Chunji knew.  When Chunji’s fingertips skimmed behind his balls, they curled in and caressed a spot right where his sac began, touching just softly enough to make his breath catch and his legs shake while some secret flame of pleasure sparked to life.  On his own, he could mess around rubbing every inch of his balls from his perineum to his cock and never find that one spot, but Chunji found it with uncanny accuracy every time.

            “How is it?” Chunji whispered.  His hand wrapped around Ricky’s erection, and all of the air rushed out of Ricky’s body.  He jacked slowly, his grip rippling and pulsing, riding up the shaft and sliding back down, taking his time.  “Like it?”

            “Oh my god,” Ricky breathed.  “It’s the best.”  The sight of Chunji’s hand on his cock was mesmerizing.  Those smooth, pale fingers snugly circling his fat, red shaft.  The way Chunji’s thumb trailed behind or led the way, stroking in its own separate, lazy rhythm, flitting around the rim of the mushroom cap or smearing sticky drops of precum until Ricky’s erection glistened.  Chunji had his very own way of doing things, and Ricky couldn’t rush him, didn’t interfere.

            While Chunji’s smooth, sexy hand played with his cock, he tried to hold still.  If he drew their manager’s attention, Chunji would have to stop.  If he woke up the other members, they’d say something stupid and alert their manager.  It was a struggle to be still and quiet when his body’s every impulse was to move and get loud.  He was so turned on that his hips wanted to thrust, to push up into Chunji’s hand.  His whole body felt restless, his feet kicking, his hand clawing at Chunji’s thigh, his other hand clutching desperately at the seat.  The sexual excitement whipping through his body was hitting highs he couldn’t contain, and he bit at his lips, trying to stifle the happy squeals rushing up his throat.

            “Such a big old cock for such a little squirmy pig,” Chunji whispered.  As the ring of his fingers stroked lazily up and down, he lingered over the widest part mid-shaft.  “What’s a cute little kid like you doing with a thick, sexy cock like this?  And so long, mmm, look at it.”  Chunji gave the base of his cock a squeeze, then caressed upward.  “From all the way down there to a-a-a-a-all the way up here.  And look at this.”  While Ricky shook and chewed on his lips and pawed at Chunji’s thigh, Chunji’s thumb rubbed slowly, expertly, over the head of his cock.  “I know some women who’d love to ride a big, fat knob like this.”  Chunji’s chuckle was so suggestive, Ricky shuddered with lust.  “Some men, too.”

            Sweating under his make-up, Ricky panted, his lungs burning, his cock throbbing.  He ached all over, a deep ache he knew Chunji would never satisfy.  He couldn’t stop himself from asking for it.  “Hyung, please.”  He sounded desperate, frustrated, wounded.  “Please, I, just this once.”

            “Yeah,” Chunji murmured, rhythmically jacking only the bottom few inches, neglecting the head while beads of pre-cum rolled down the shaft.  Ah, oh god, oh god, he was so close, if he could just get a little bit more, just a little, he was almost there, ah, ah.  “Gorgeous feast like this is a cocksucker’s dream.”

            “God damn it,” C.A.P. muttered under his breath.  “If you love it so much, you suck it.”

            Chunji’s hand slipped, squeezing tightly, and all of a sudden Ricky was coming, gasping wildly and shuddering helplessly and squirting cum everywhere.  Chunji yelped and Ricky clutched at his erection, trying to catch the cum before it landed on his stage clothes.  “Shit, what the fuck?!” Chunji demanded, punching him.

            “Sorry, sorry, I’m sorry,” Ricky babbled.  Oh, god, he’d never felt pleasure spike like that.  It was like hitting a speed bump at a hundred miles an hour.

            “Jackasses, both of you,” C.A.P. said, tossing napkins into Ricky’s lap.  “Clean that crap up.”

            “Damn it,” Chunji said.  “What the hell was that?”

            “What does it look like?” Ricky demanded, flustered and disoriented.  He scrubbed at his clothes, mopping up, hurriedly shoving his cock back into his pants.  Streaks of cum smeared stickily over his black pants and shirt.

            “You helped to make the mess, you help to clean it up,” C.A.P. ordered.

            “I didn’t do this!” Chunji protested.

            “Ya!  What is it?” their manager demanded.

            “Nothing,” C.A.P. said.  “Stupid kids spilled their water.  They’ll clean it.”

            “It’s taken care of,” Chunji said.  He glared at Ricky, then wiped angrily at Ricky’s pants.  “Why are you so stupid?”

            “Me?” Ricky asked.  “You did this.”

            “I didn’t do this,” Chunji insisted.

            “Mmm.  What?” L.Joe asked sleepily, stirring.

            “Nothing,” Chunji snapped.  “Go back to sleep.”

            Ricky was mortified that he’d actually come so suddenly like that, and he was excited that he’d actually gotten off, and he was angry that Chunji was being such a jerk about it, and he was kind of high from orgasm, and having Chunji rub at his crotch and thighs wasn’t doing anything to lessen his internal chaos.  “Why don’t you?”

            Chunji shot him an annoyed look and wiped at his shirt.  “Why don’t I what?”

            It was like walking towards a sharp knife, and he couldn’t make himself stop.  “What C.A.P. hyung said.  If you like it so much.”

            Chunji froze, staring into his face.  Then Chunji smiled a slow, beautiful, wicked smile.  “Do you want to die?”

            It was impossible not to love someone who could be so good-looking and so scary at the same time.  “I-”

            “It’s okay,” Chunji said lightly, calmly, with a nod.  “I won’t kill you right away.  It’s best to wait first, so you have time to anticipate it.”

            “No, I-”

            “Don’t worry.”  Chunji patted his shoulder with a reassuring smile that made his heart flutter happily even while he recognized that he was in danger.  “I’ll make sure that it’s very painful.”

            By the time everyone was awake, the whole group knew that Ricky had come on himself.

            They weren’t shocked, since they’d seen Chunji play with Ricky’s cock before.  The most interesting part for them was that he’d come on his stage clothes; no one had done that since right after debut.  L.Joe scolded him and Niel made fun of him for not being able to control himself and Changjo pretended to spill things on him the rest of the day.  He didn’t care about any of that, though; he was preoccupied with being nice to Chunji.

            It had been really stupid to say that to Chunji.  Especially since Chunji hadn’t liked hearing it from C.A.P.  Since C.A.P. was their leader and their hyung, he’d gotten away with it, but Ricky was just a dongsaeng.  There was no way Chunji wasn’t going to exact revenge.

            Ricky fetched things and bought drinks and minded his manners all evening, but Chunji just gave him that beautiful, wicked smile of warning.  Eventually, out of ideas, he snuck away with Chunji’s phone and took photos of himself holding up an “I’m sorry” sign and looking pitifully remorseful.

            The next day, Chunji’s smile was gone.  In its place was a morose, brooding stare.  He was in a horrible mood.  After he got into a fight with L.Joe and made Changjo cry, C.A.P. told him not to say another word until he got his shit together.  He spent the rest of the day glaring at everyone and “accidentally” kicking them.

            Ricky felt awful.  It hurt to see Chunji unhappy and it made him feel guilty.  He didn’t understand why Chunji was so upset, but he knew that it was his fault, at least partially.  He wished that he could fix things, but he couldn’t undo what had happened, and Chunji didn’t care about any of his apologies.  He’d already tried aegyo, but Chunji had smacked him and told him to stop it.

            What else could he do?  Cook something?  Buy something?  What could he do that Chunji might like?

            The part of him Chunji liked best was the part that had gotten him into this problem to begin with.

            Back in the dorm that night, he thought that over.  Should he leave Chunji alone and hope that tomorrow things might be better?  Should he apologize again?  Sulking, feeling resentful and sorry for himself, he thought about how if he walked in and tried to apologize, Chunji would kick him out, but if his cock went in to apologize, it and Chunji would probably make up and be best friends.

            The more he thought about that, the more weird images popped up in his mind - - Chunji and his cock hanging out together, talking, watching TV, going to a café - - until he was laughing.  And then he had a very bad idea.

            He had to time it just right.  He waited until everyone else was either asleep or busy, until Chunji was alone in the room.  In a tank top and his underwear, he rubbed his cock until it was all perked up, and then he slipped into Chunji’s room.

            Chunji was seated on the floor, leaning against the side of his bed.  Without looking up from his phone, he said, “Get out.”

            “I brought something to make you feel better.”  This had been the worst idea ever.  Ricky had to go.  He should run away.  Now, right now, he should run away.  Why was he still walking toward Chunji?  No, no, stupid feet, no!  Not toward Chunji!  Away, away, he had to leave!  “Sometimes when I’m upset, my mom brings me one of my favorite toys to play with.”  He crouched down beside Chunji.

            “Get the fuck o-o-out.”  Scowling, Chunji had started to look up at Ricky.  But as his gaze slid upward, it seemed to get stuck at Ricky’s crotch, and he stammered as he stared.

            Wow.  That was kind of amazing.  Feeling more confident now, Ricky slid onto his knees and pushed his shorts down.  “Maybe this will make you feel better.”  Holding his breath, he watched Chunji’s face and waited.

            Chunji blinked once.  Swallowed.  His nostrils flared and he licked his lips.  He was breathing kind of fast.  “You bold little shit,” he said, but he didn’t take his gaze away from Ricky’s cock and he didn’t sound angry at all.  “Lock the door.”

            Whoa.  Feeling kind of giddy - - he didn’t know what was happening but he loved all of it - - he hurried up and over to the door.  Behind him, Chunji moved; when he turned, Chunji sat on the edge of the bed.  He hurried back, and Chunji caught him by his hips, placing him right between Chunji’s legs.  He couldn’t help but recognize this position, but Chunji couldn’t really - - was Chunji about to - - no, there was no way that Chunji would - - shit, he was so turned on he could hardly hold still.

            Chunji’s forefinger poked him hard in the stomach.  “Don’t you ever tell anyone about this.”

            Chunji’s expression warned him of his impending death.  “Yes, hyung,” he said in his best obedient voice.

            Another warning look, and then Chunji’s attention was on his cock again.  Chunji’s fingers curled around the shaft and slid right to the base, and then.

            His cock.

            Was in.

            Chunji’s mouth.

            In Chunji’s mouth, his cock, it was in Chunji’s mouth.  His Chunji, his hyung, that was Chunji’s mouth.  Chunji’s sexy, pink lips were wrapped around his erection.  “Oh my god.”

            “Mmm.”  With a pleased smile, Chunji glanced up at him.  The unexpected eye contact took him by surprise.  Feeling a sudden arrow of heat shot through him, he jerked, thrusting deeper into Chunji’s mouth.  “Ooooohhh.”  Eyes closing, Chunji looked blissful with his mouth full of Ricky’s cock, and he sucked harder, sliding down to the base.  “Mmmm, ohhhh.”  His thumb rubbing around the base, he slid up the shaft again.  “It’s so big, I thought that it would be too much to work with, but it’s great.  It feels so good, god, I love it.”  Resting his hands on Ricky’s thighs, he looked up again.  “Move your hips, thrust in a little bit.”  His gaze sharpened.  “Not too hard.”

            Ricky nodded.  He couldn’t believe this.  He’d never expected Chunji to go this far.  And he’d never gotten a blowjob from someone who talked like this and gave instructions.  It was weird and kind of annoying and really sexy.  Turned on, feeling sexual energy running up his thighs, he nudged his fat cockhead between Chunji’s lips.  Carefully, excited but keenly aware that if he messed up he’d be in serious trouble, he pushed forward.  “Oh, oh god.”  It felt so perfect, so soft and wet, that he thrust farther in than he’d meant to, his cock suddenly filling Chunji’s mouth.

            “Mmmmhhh.”  Eyes closing, Chunji sucked at his cock.  Groaning, he rocked his hips, testing the pull of suction, sliding his erection back and forth in that wet heat.  Chunji’s hands rubbed over his thighs, and he thrust shallowly into Chunji’s mouth, watching with disbelief as his erection disappeared between Chunji’s pretty pink lips.

            Chunji looked really happy, really into it, his eyes closed, his cheeks flushed.  Ricky thrust deeper, backing out farther for a good, long stroke in, and he moaned loudly, energetically.  His fingers slid up the back of Ricky’s underwear, reaching through the leg holes to clutch at Ricky’s ass, and Ricky put a hand on top of his head, thrusting faster.  “Aaahhhmmm, uuuhhmmm.”  His lips were wet with drool and pre-cum; it was starting to dribble down his chin.  Slurping and groaning, he only got louder as Ricky became more aggressive.  Too turned on to be careful anymore, Ricky pumped down his throat in long, plunging strokes, gripping his hair in both hands.  “Aahhhh, oohhh, oh.”  He jerked down Ricky’s underwear, cupping Ricky’s ass.

            The way Chunji’s fingers slid right up the cleft turned Ricky on, and he squirmed, gasping, fucking excitedly.  Staring as he drove his erection between Chunji’s pretty lips, he couldn’t believe that Chunji was letting him do this, that Chunji liked it.  The hot, wet slide into Chunji’s mouth was just what his cock needed.  Pleasure ran fever-hot in his veins as he rolled his hips, sending his thick, rigid shaft between Chunji’s wet, dripping lips.  He needed to come, he was going to come, he just didn’t want to, not yet, not if he could hold on for just a second longer and feel this wild, wicked pleasure burning between his legs.

            It was Chunji, Chunji was sucking his cock, he loved Chunji so much and he’d wanted Chunji so badly and all of a sudden this, this was happening, it was happening and it was the best, best thing ever, it was like a miracle on his cock, he couldn’t believe it, Chunji, Chunji, it was Chunji.

            Chunji’s eyes opened, gazing up at him, and he didn’t know what to do with that, he could hardly take it, it made everything so much more real.  He was thrusting into Chunji’s mouth, pushing his cock down Chunji’s throat, and Chunji was staring up at him with those gorgeous brown eyes, watching him, expression heavy-lidded and aroused.  Feeling completely overwhelmed, he babbled something like, “Oh my god, oh my god, hyung, hyung, oh my god,” and then Chunji winked at him, winked at him with a mouth full of cock, not just any cock but his cock, and it was over, he was done, cataclysmic ecstasy rocketed through him from the balls of his feet to the top of his head and he came, squirting everything he had into Chunji’s mouth.

            Gasping, unsteady, he stared.  Pleasure was still pulsing through him and he didn’t want to take his cock out of Chunji’s mouth because he was afraid that he’d never be allowed to put it back in.  Couldn’t he just keep it there?  For a while?  Cum was leaking from the corners of Chunji’s mouth.  His cum.  His cum was dribbling out of Chunji’s mouth.  “Oh my god.”

            With a really obscene, wet slurp, Chunji slid off of Ricky’s cock.  Licking his lips, he rubbed his chin.  He was smiling, and he looked happy, like going down on Ricky had been a great experience, and that completely blew Ricky’s mind.  Closing his eyes, he leaned back, draping himself across the bed.  “That was so great.”  Squirming a little, he rubbed at his cock through his shorts.  He had a hard-on.  Blowing Ricky had turned him on.

            Ricky had to check the impulse to climb on top of him and kiss him.  “You, uh, you…  Do you want me to get you off?”  It was worth a shot, right?  It was okay to ask, it had to be okay at least to ask, after what Chunji had just done all over Ricky’s penis.  Or, um, what Ricky had just done all over Chunji’s mouth.

            Chunji laughed - - not a mean laugh, just a regular happy chuckle - - and sat up a little, pushing himself up onto his elbows.  His lips were red and kind of swollen; his eyes were as bright and captivating as ever.  “Do you even know how?”

            “I know!  I know how!”  He got himself off all of the time, didn’t he?  It couldn’t be any different, really, touching somebody else.  Although the way Chunji jacked him was way better than how he masturbated.  Ugh, maybe he didn’t know after all.  But he wasn’t going to admit that out loud.  Or were they talking about something else?  If Chunji was asking about blowjobs, then no, he had no clue.  “What, what do you want?”

            Chunji sighed but said, “Come here,” and scooted around.

            While Chunji stretched out on the bed, Ricky lay down beside him.  It was a tight fit, the both of them on one small mattress, and being this close made Ricky hurt with the desire to kiss him.  His handsome face was so close, his long, black lashes, his sexy mouth.  What if, just…  Staring at Chunji’s soft, red lips, Ricky leaned in.

            Laughing, Chunji twisted away, shoving at his chest.  “What are you doing?”

            “Kissing,” Ricky explained, leaning in again.

            “Ew, don’t kiss me.”  Then, just as Ricky’s crushed heart plummeted to the floor, he added, carelessly, “Maybe you can kiss me later if you get me off right.  Here, give me your hand.”

            He’d do a good job.  He’d do a great job.  He’d prove to Chunji that he knew what he was doing, that he was great at sex.  He’d make Chunji see him in a different light.  Determined, Ricky put his hand into Chunji’s.  This was going to be the best handjob ever.

            “Okay, do it gently.”  Chunji guided his hand down the front of Chunji’s underwear, down against warm, silky skin.  Holding his breath, he felt a tremor of excitement as his fingers brushed soft, curly hairs, and then his palm slid over the hot, smooth hardness of Chunji’s erection.  As he heard a gasp, his gaze flew to Chunji’s face.  He was just in time to see Chunji’s eyes close, Chunji’s white teeth catching on a soft bottom lip.

            Chunji’s hand fell away; Ricky was on his own.  Closing his hand around Chunji’s hard, smooth cock, he realized that he was at a completely different angle from his usual stroke.  Remembering Chunji’s warning to be gentle, he felt his way over Chunji’s cock lightly.  It looked unbelievably sexy in his hand, sturdy and veiny, the head a deep, dark pink.  He wanted to lean closer and get a better look - - he really wanted to kiss it - - but he was already so far ahead, he didn’t want to push his luck.

            When his hand dipped down to fondle Chunji’s balls, Chunji twitched and winced.  “No, don’t, I’m ticklish.”

            “Okay,” Ricky said quickly, soothingly.  Whatever Chunji wanted; making this good for Chunji was all that mattered.  He was caressing Chunji’s cock sort of erratically, lightly stroking wherever his fingers wanted to go, using no rhythm whatsoever.  He kept telling himself to get his act together and do it right, jack Chunji off, but then his hand would get fascinated with the sweet, smooth slide up and down the shaft, or he’d get all excited about caressing the head, and he’d get off track again.

            Luckily, it seemed to be working, anyway.  Making a low, lusty, “Uuunnhhh,” sound, Chunji squirmed lazily, undulating, his hips rolling, pushing his cock against Ricky’s hand.  Licking his lips, he plucked at his nipple, twisting it through his T-shirt.

            Ricky wanted to ask if he was doing it right, but if he spoke, he might remind Chunji that he was there.  At the moment, he wasn’t sure if Chunji remembered about him or not.  Eyes closed, Chunji seemed to be enjoying things alone.  Curling his hand around Chunji’s cock, he fisted it lightly, keeping his grip looser than he did on himself.

            “Ahhh…  Oh, yes, oh.”  Chunji’s voice was high, breathy.  “Oh, ooohh, ah!”  Rolling right up toward Ricky, he gasped, his hand landing on Ricky’s upper arm.  “Like that, god, yes, keep doing that, ahh-hh-hh-ahhh.”

            Overjoyed, Ricky kept going, slowly and tenderly pumping Chunji’s erection.  Chunji’s face was so close that they could easily kiss, so close that he could watch Chunji’s lashes flutter, so close that the flits and flickers of Chunji’s tongue made him whimper.

            With his hand on Ricky’s arm now, spasmodically tightening, Chunji wasn’t playing with his nipples anymore.  Ricky wondered if it would be okay to do it for him.  His shirt was bunched up over his chest, the fabric twisted by his nipple, and Ricky touched him there, rubbing over the tiny nub.

            Chunji’s fingers dug into Ricky’s arm.  “Harder.”

            God, yes, okay, anything.  Eager to obey, Ricky rubbed harder, thumb flicking roughly over his nipple.  It was hard to coordinate both hands, to stroke lightly here and rub firmly there, but it was worth it when his back arched and he moaned like it felt good.  He pulled his shirt up, tugging it out of the way, giving Ricky access to his bare chest, his taut skin, his reddened nipple.

            Acting on need and impulse, Ricky went for what he wanted, diving in and kissing that tender nub.  Moaning, lust knotting and twisting in his gut, he sucked at Chunji’s nipple, scrubbing it with his tongue.

            “Ah, fuck, maknae, harder, bite it, god.”  Chunji’s fingers threaded through his hair, tugging, and he moaned in excitement, nipping at Chunji’s chest, scraping his teeth over that red little nipple.  “Fuck, ah, coming, I’m going to come.”  Chunji was breathless, gasping, shuddering under him, and he bit Chunji again, jacking Chunji’s cock lightly, tenderly, coaxing it, and Chunji pulled his hair hard, groaning.  “Oh, oh, oh, that’s it, yes, yes, oh!”  His hand was wet; he raised his head in time to see cum splatter over Chunji’s abs.  “Oh, oh, so good, so good like that, god.”

            Incredulous, Ricky stared at the cock in his hand, at the cum dribbling over his fingers, at the red soreness of Chunji’s nipple, at the relaxed smile curving Chunji’s lips.  He’d just made Chunji come.  He’d gotten Chunji off.  This was the best feeling in the world.  He was a freaking champion.

            Eyes opening, Chunji batted Ricky’s hands away.  With a lithe wriggle, he squirmed out of his clothes, using his underwear to wipe up cum before tossing it aside.  “Damn.”  On his side with his head on his hand, he studied Ricky with interest.  “I thought you wouldn’t know what you were doing.”

            “I do know,” Ricky insisted.  “I’m good at this.”

            Chunji laughed, eyes sparkling.  “I guess so.”  His fingers walked over Ricky’s chest, then drew a circle around one nipple.  “I’m so tired I’m about to pass out.  You got me off too well.”

            No, he didn’t want Chunji to fall asleep, he didn’t want to have to go.  “Can’t we kiss?  You said it would be okay if I did it right.”

            Chunji sniffed, then shrugged and kissed him.  It was a quick, soft press of lips, and it felt incredible.  Immediately wanting more, he leaned in, pursuing Chunji’s mouth, taking another kiss.  This time Chunji stayed, and he put his hand on Chunji’s waist, wanting to grab at Chunji, to take what he needed.  When his tongue slid over Chunji’s lower lip, Chunji licked at him, and then he was moaning, and Chunji’s tongue was in his mouth, and pleasure was streaking up his spine.

            While they traded the best, deepest, sexiest kisses of Ricky’s life, his hand slid over Chunji’s naked ass.  Chunji’s skin was so soft, so smooth, he wanted to touch everything, and Chunji’s ass was firm but it yielded perfectly when he squeezed.  Chunji’s hands were on his chest, rubbing his skin, massaging, scratching.  He couldn’t kiss Chunji enough, couldn’t get enough of Chunji’s teasing, licking tongue, and whenever he moaned, Chunji made a low, throaty, encouraging sound.

            Pleasure was running through him like a charge, desire crackling like electricity, arousal heating him up.  He loved the sucking, licking way Chunji kissed, loved the assertive way Chunji touched him, loved the way Chunji kept arching to rock back against his squeezing, groping hand.  Then, with a sudden yawn, Chunji pushed him away.

            “Ah.  Horny pig baby.”  Chunji yawned again, rubbing Ricky’s chest, patting it with one hand.  “Let me sleep.”  Then, with mischievous interest, he looked down, eyeing Ricky’s groin.  Embarrassed, Ricky squirmed back, hard-on bobbing.  “Stay here.  I want to sleep with my friend.”

            Stay?  Thrilled, Ricky nodded.  “Okay, hyung.”

            Looking sleepy, eyelids heavy, Chunji rubbed his nose.  He pushed Ricky to lay flat, then snuggled in with his head on Ricky’s chest.  “Hold still,” he murmured, eyes closing.

            Wow.  This was the best.  “Yes, hyung.”  Wrapping his arm around Chunji’s lithe, smooth body, he stared down at the head on his chest.  Chunji was falling asleep on him.  Chunji was naked and they’d gotten each other off and now he was allowed to stay while Chunji slept on him.  Shit, coming to Chunji’s room tonight had been the best idea he’d ever had.

            The doorknob rattled.  “Ya!  The door’s locked!”

            “Sleep somewhere else!” Chunji shouted without moving or even opening his eyes.  “I’m busy!”

            Busy with Ricky.  Grinning foolishly, Ricky held him close.

            It was the best night ever.  Ricky barely got any sleep, but he wasn’t complaining.  He couldn’t sleep when he was so happy, so excited.  Hope and sexual energy buzzed through him all night.  He kept thinking about what had happened, replaying it.  Images of his cock filling Chunji’s mouth, of Chunji staring up at him with that demanding, aroused look, of his cum spilling over Chunji’s lips, seemed too vivid to have ever been real.  He remembered the hardness of Chunji’s cock in his hand, the nub of Chunji’s nipple under his tongue, the way Chunji had rolled toward him and held onto him.  The way Chunji had kissed him, so deep, so sexy.  Chunji liked him.  Chunji wanted him.  Maybe.  Probably.  At least kind of.

            In the morning, Chunji woke up and blew him.  It was one of the most exciting things that had ever happened to him, and it was just that simple.  His cock was already hard - - he’d been uncomfortably hard for most of the night - - and he didn’t even realize that Chunji was awake before Chunji had a hand on it.  While sexual excitement was thrumming through his body, Chunji slid down and kissed his cock, and then Chunji was sucking it.

            Head bobbing, lips stretched around the girth of Ricky’s cock, Chunji moaned.  It was so sudden and such a turn-on that Ricky went up in flames, coming hard and fast, clutching at the bed and squirting in Chunji’s mouth.  It was over as abruptly as it had started.  Shaken, gasping, Ricky watched as Chunji lifted his head and wiped casually at his mouth.  Their eyes met, and Chunji chuckled.  “Stop looking scared.  I’m not going to bite it.”

            “I’m not scared.”  Maybe he was.  Scared that this would stop.  Scared that if he left this bed, he wouldn’t ever figure out the magical combination to get back into it again.

            Chunji flopped beside him and said, “Come here.”  Chunji tugged at him, but he was quick to comply, rolling over and moving right into Chunji’s arms.  He didn’t have a clue what was happening, but when Chunji hugged him, he hugged back.  Chunji sighed, and he ran his hands over Chunji’s back, mesmerized by the smoothness of Chunji’s skin, the sleek muscles of Chunji’s strong body.

            While he touched Chunji, he was being touched right back.  Chunji’s hands wandered his body, caressing his thighs, stroking over his shoulders, tracing the line of his spine.  After a while, Chunji asked, in a thoughtful tone, “How old are you?”

            “You know how old I am.”  He was surprised and uncomfortable.  Was Chunji going to decide that he was too young for this?  “I’m eighteen, hyung.”

            “This feels nice.”  Chunji caressed his back, drawing slow, looping circles over his skin.  “It’s comfortable.”

            “I like it,” he admitted.  He loved it.  He loved Chunji.  He couldn’t stand this, couldn’t take not knowing what Chunji was thinking about.

            “You like me.  Don’t you?”

            “No,” he mumbled.  Shit.  He had to confess, didn’t he?  Maybe Chunji needed to know.  Maybe it would convince Chunji to give him a chance.  “I guess I do.”

            Chunji caressed the back of his neck.  It was affectionate; it made him feel better, eased his bruised heart.  “When I met you, I thought that you were about eight years old.  You looked like a baby.  You always looked like such a little kid.  I knew that you were getting older, but I couldn’t take you seriously.”  Ricky hated this; tense, he dreaded whatever Chunji might say next.  “But the other day, I saw your photos in my phone.  I didn’t know they were there, they surprised me.  I felt like I was meeting you for the first time.  Who was this handsome guy on my phone?  You looked so serious, so handsome, so brooding and sexy, I just stared at my phone like, what is this?  Who could this be?  Ricky has an older brother I haven’t met?  It was so strange, I didn’t know what to think.  And then you gave me more photos, and then more, and I couldn’t stop thinking about it.  I looked at those stupid photos over and over again, I couldn’t put my phone down.”

            Giddy, Ricky hugged Chunji more tightly.  “I look at your photos all of the time, too, hyung.  The ones you took on my phone.  You’re so sexy.”

            “You’re sexy!”  Chunji laughed, squeezing him.  “I didn’t know that you could be sexy!  I thought only that one part of you was sexy and the rest of you was still a foolish kid.  I didn’t know that you grew up.”

            “I’m very sexy,” he protested, feeling good, feeling happy, feeling light and bubbly.  He rubbed his hands over Chunji’s back, cupping Chunji’s ass.  “I’m an adult now, hyung.  You should notice.”

            “Mmm, I noticed.”  Chunji kissed his ear, licking at his earlobe.  “I think that we should keep on noticing each other.”

            Ricky was so happy, he could have run screaming through the streets.  “You mean keep getting each other off.”

            A soft, knowing chuckle.  “Yeah, that, too.”  Grinding against him, Chunji kissed his neck.  He shivered at the soft brush of Chunji’s lips.  “I like the way you touched me last night.  God, it was the best.  I haven’t come that hard in so long.”

            “I love touching you, you’re so hot,” Ricky confessed, excitement pumping through him, his heart overflowing, his hand sliding between Chunji’s thighs.  The moment his hand met Chunji’s cock, they both moaned, Chunji’s back arching, his hand closing lightly but eagerly around the stiffening shaft.  “You’re so sexy, hyung, I want you so much.  And I love the way you touch me, I love it, it feels better than anything.  You turn me on so much, all of the time, I want you so badly.”

            “Ah, yeah, so good, feels so good.”  Moaning, Chunji shuddered against him, and then they were kissing, Chunji sucking on his tongue and bucking into his hand.  “Want you, too, want you so much,” Chunji panted, nails digging into his back.  “God, maknae, get me off, please, ah, hhh-ooh-oh-oh, yes, Ricky-ah, oh…”

            They made out and got each other off and made out some more all morning.  And in the van that afternoon.  And in the practice room that evening.  And in Chunji’s bed again all night, and the next morning, and all of the time, whenever they had even a tiny bit of privacy.  Chunji stopped calling him a horny pig and started saying things like, “God, you’re so sexy,” and, “Tell me you want me, tell me you’re hot for me.”  Instead of only being interested in his cock, Chunji was interested in all of him, kissing him all over, gazing into his eyes, talking to him for hours.  He got less and less of Chunji’s “ugh, this stupid kid” face and more and more of a new expression, a bright and interested look that said, “I’m happy to see you,” and, “Come here, sexy.”

            Sometimes Ricky couldn’t believe that any of it was real, that the sexy, flirtatious, temperamental hyung who’d tormented him actually liked him and wanted him and gave him head every morning.  Sometimes he stayed awake, incredulous, recounting everything that had happened, every kiss, every smile, while Chunji slept naked in his arms.

            If he needed proof that things were different, his phone was full of dozens of photos of him and Chunji together.  Smiling, sexy, cute couple selcas, and Chunji looked happy to be with him in every one.

            Every few days, the wallpaper on Chunji’s phone changed.  Every time, it was a different shot of Ricky.  Ricky onstage, or asleep in the van, or slumped on the dressing room couch, or waving hello, or waking up in bed looking mussed and grumpy.  To Ricky, a few of them were flattering, but some of them were boring or awkward or embarrassing.  He kept asking, “Why do you have this?  Ugh!  I look awful, change it.”  But Chunji just smiled and said, “I like it.  I like looking at you when you’re like this.”  Every time, he fell for it and asked, “Like this, like what?”  And Chunji would give him a smug smile and tug on his shirt to pull him closer and look right into his eyes and murmur, “Mine.”

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Copyright May 11, 2014
by Matthew Haldeman-Time