Boundaries

K-pop info and glossary 

Who’s who chart of idols

This story is part of a series.

I write about men having sex with other men.  You must be eighteen or older to read my fiction.  This site is for consenting, responsible adults only.



            Hwanhee was in the van, hurtling from one schedule to another.  After they ran through the university show, they were going to have to get over to the festival.  He’d thought that tonight was the cola festival and tomorrow night was the save-the-kids one, but tonight was the save-the-kids one.  The cola festival was going to be great and everything, but the save-the-kids one was huge, with a massive crowd and a boatload of sunbaes and a ton of TV coverage.  Super exciting.  Really awesome.  Kind of a lot of pressure.

            He tried to close his eyes and rest in the van, to recover some of the lost sleep from practicing late and hitting the salon early, but his brain kept ticking, ticking, bringing up all kinds of fun topics for discussion, like how unreliable the sound systems at these one-off events always were, and how sore his knee was, and how amazing Kuhn had looked in the shower that morning, and how he hadn’t gotten laid in days, and how-

            He shook his head, opening his eyes.  Okay, no, just, he’d look at his lists.  Taking his phone out, he pulled up his lists.

            He was putting happy stars around the word “grapes” and question marks beside “oranges” when Sunyoul said, “Aw, oh, no.”

            “Hmm?” he asked, adding more stars.  Grapes were a great idea.  So were cookies!  Chocolate chip again, or should he try a different flavor?

            “The fans are upset,” Sunyoul said.  Hwanhee glanced at him; he was reading something on his phone.  “They can’t get into the festival, they can’t get tickets.”

            “Too many sunbae fandoms?” Gyujin asked.

            “Aw, they’re pissed off at EXO-L,” Sunyoul said.  “That’s no good, I don’t want them to get resentful.”

            “EXO who?” Hwanhee asked, sitting up straighter.  “EXO-L’s there?  Is EXO there?  Is EXO performing tonight?”

            “Okay, god, breathe,” Xiao said, laughing at him.

            “I guess so,” Sunyoul said.  “They have to be, why else would EXO-L be there?”

            Ooohhh,” Xiao said, poking at Hwanhee, tickling him.  “Guess who’s gonna be there?  Guess who-”

            “Don’t tease him,” Sunyoul chided, laughing, while Hwanhee squirmed and kicked Xiao’s seat.

            “Is he really coming?” Hwanhee demanded.  “But I don’t have anything!”

            “Anything like what?” Sunyoul asked.

            Xiao’s eyes sparkled.  “Did you forget your harness?”

            Ya!” Sunyoul exclaimed, smacking Xiao’s arm.  “Don’t say that!”

            “Not in the van, maknae, come on,” Gyujin chided.

            Hwanhee thumped Xiao just because he could, and then he explained, “I didn’t mean that!  I just meant, I don’t know.  What if he needs water, or something, or-”

            “He has water, they’ll have water,” Sunyoul said.

            “All right, what’s going on?” Kogyeol asked, stirring in the backseat.  “This is getting loud, who do I have to tell to shut up?”

            Hwanhee,” Xiao said, while Hwanhee said, “Xiao,” and then they smacked at each other, laughing.

            “EXO’s performing tonight,” Sunyoul explained.  “Oh Sehun Oh Sehun Oh Sehun sunbae’s going to be there.”

            “Why three times?” Gyujin asked, laughing.

            “Teen Top does it, it’s fun,” Sunyoul said.  “Oh Sehun Oh Sehun Oh Sehun, see how fast you can do it.”

            While his members joked, Hwanhee checked his lists, excited and anxious.  He was going to see his prince tonight, and he wasn’t ready!



            “Van, van, in the van, maknae,” Chen called, holding the door open for him.

            Xiumin leaned out, clapping his hands together.  “Come on!  Sometime today!”

            “Yeah, yeah, I’m coming.”  Still shrugging into his jacket, Sehun strolled over to the van.  “So what is this?” he asked, climbing in.

            “God, you never listen,” Xiumin said.  “A festival, maknae, the kids’ festival, we’re trying to save lives here.”

            They’d been touring all week and the one before that, and this was his first twenty-four hours back in Korea.  He wasn’t sure which time zone he was in.  After all of the big crowds and long concerts and foreign languages, he just wasn’t all that fazed by the prospect of a single festival.

            “I don’t think that we’re saving lives, personally,” Chen said.

            “We’re raising money or raising awareness or something,” Chanyeol said.

            Sehun yawned, stretching out.  He’d get his energy up for show time, once he was in front of EXO-L.

            “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Xiumin said.  “This face?  These dance moves?  Life-saving, over here, I’m saving lives.”

            Chen snickered.  Ya, how do you save lives with your dance moves?”

            “Have you not seen me onstage?” Xiumin asked.  “Watch me tonight, you’ll catch on.”



            The hallway of dressing rooms was so busy, Hwanhee didn’t think that anyone would notice another stray idol moving around.  Managers and festival staff and girl groups in high heels were all rushing back and forth, and no one was looking at him.

            Kind of embarrassing.  He needed to work harder, so that people would notice him and care about Up10tion.  If he were U-Know Yunho walking around, people would look!

            On his first walk by, EXO’s dressing room was closed.

            On his second through fifth walk bys, it was still closed.

            On the sixth, it was open a crack!  But he couldn’t peek in, he’d look like a stalker!

            He was going back for another pass when Park Chanyeol walked by.

            Park Chanyeol was out of the dressing room.  Was Prince Sehun out, too?  Maybe?  Biting his lip, he tried to be cool about strolling past.

            Xiumin was coming from the other direction.  Xiumin actually looked right at him and did a quick, discerning double-take.  He blushed, not sure whether to be really excited that Xiumin recognized him or totally embarrassed that Xiumin didn’t recognize him.  Pointing at him, Xiumin asked, “Are you performing tonight?”

            “Yes, sunbae.  Sunbaenim,” he corrected himself.

            “Does he know that?”

            “I don’t know.”

            Xiumin chuckled.  “Hang out here in the hallway for a minute,” he said, and he jogged away.

            Was he going to get Sehun?

            Hwanhee leaned against the wall, trying to tuck himself out of the way.

            Then someone smacked him on the ass.  He yelped, jumping, and turned to see Niel.  Niel?!  “Hyung!  What are you doing here?”

            “What are you doing here, are you going on?”

            “Yeah, yeah, we’re performing.  Two songs.”  He smiled.  “Please look out for us, sunbaenim!”

            Niel rolled his eyes.

            “Are you here by yourself?”

            “Yeah.  I didn’t know you were here, why didn’t they put you in my dressing room?” Niel asked, picking at Hwanhee’s hair.

            “I don’t know.  There’s a lot of us, maybe they didn’t want us to crowd you.”

            “There’s a lot of everybody,” Niel said, glancing around.  “They put me in with,” he covered his mouth with one hand and whispered the group’s name.  Then he made a face.

            Ooohhh, did Niel not like them?  But they were so popular!  “You can come and hang out in our room.  There’s room for one more, no one would notice.”



            “Something in the hallway, maknae.  Just go out there, trust me, you’re going to want to see this.”

            Sehun didn’t know what Xiumin was up to, but he decided to humor his hyung.  He stepped into the hallway, glancing around.  What was he supposed to see?  What was this, a hidden camera?  He heard his hyungs whispering to each other behind him, and then Baekhyun laughed, and then an impatient hand pushed him a couple of steps away from the door.

            He was about to turn around and ask what was going on, when he heard Baekhyun laugh again.

            Not behind him.  In front of him.

            Then he heard it again, and he knew that sound.  He recognized that laugh, he’d heard it a dozen times.  That wasn’t his hyung.  That was his pet.

            His gaze flew up the hallway.  Past the bored manager and the nervous hoobae and straight to his pet.

            There.  With his back half turned to Sehun.  Wearing tight white pants and a yellow T-shirt.  Leaning one shoulder against the wall, talking to someone.  Smiling up at someone, so friendly, so trusting, chatting happily.  The two of them stood close together.  Too close.  Sehun didn’t like that.

            It was Niel.  Niel was touching his pet’s hair.  Sehun didn’t like that, either.

            For an instant, at first, Sehun had been frozen in shock, and then he’d been still, seething, assessing, and now he was in motion, moving forward, heading for the guy who was all over his pet.

            Over Hwanhee’s shoulder, Niel noticed Sehun.  For a second, Niel looked startled, and then he raised his hands, taking a step back, glancing around.  “Cool, man, cool, it’s all cool, okay?”

            Looking around, Hwanhee turned.  When he saw Sehun, his face brightened in a glowing smile.  “Hi, hyung!”  Then his gaze swung from Sehun to Niel and back, and he did the dongsaeng shuffle, making himself just a little bit smaller and easing back out of the way of issues between hyungs.

            “It’s cool,” Niel said again.

            “Didn’t know you’d be here,” he told Niel.

            “Well, that’s too bad, I’m your sunbae, you should show some interest in my activities,” Niel said.

            “You two know each other?”  It was a stupid question, of course they knew each other, he knew that they knew each other, he’d heard Hwanhee talk about Niel.

            It occurred to him that one of those times he’d heard about Niel was pretty telling.

            They’d been at the basketball court, and he’d been turned on, hot for his delicious pet, and he’d been trying to calm himself down.  It had been impossible to calm down with Hwanhee whispering, “Sexy, sexy, sexy,” right in his ear.  And then, apparently trying to inspire him by naming hot guys, Hwanhee had said, “Lee Hongbin,” and then, “Niel hyung.”  Niel hyung.

            He’d named Hongbin because he thought that Sehun wanted Hongbin.  But he’d come up with Niel on his own.  Why was Niel the first person Hwanhee thought of when he wanted someone to get turned on?

            “He’s my hoobae,” Niel said, like he couldn’t figure out why Sehun was even asking about this.  Then his eyes rounded.  “Not that kind of hoobae!” he whispered, glancing around.  He put on a very forced, gentle smile and looked at Hwanhee.  His hands patted the air around Hwanhee’s arms but didn’t make contact.  “Nice dongsaeng, go to your dressing room, okay?  You can talk to Oh Sehun later.”

            Hwanhee laughed.  “Um, are you okay?”

            “You don’t have to talk to him like he’s a child,” Sehun snapped.

            “How do I know?” Niel asked.  “The other one…”  Eyeing Hwanhee warily, he poked Hwanhee in the forehead.  “Is this one different from the other one?”

            “Yes, he’s different!” Sehun said, grabbing Niel’s hand and shoving it down.

            “You’re right here,” Niel said, looking confused.  “And he’s not, you know.”  He poked Hwanhee’s face again.  Then he blinked and looked at Sehun.  “Does he not like you very much?”

            Hwanhee laughed, and Sehun wanted to punch Niel.

            Ya, Lee Hwanhee!  We’re on, now!” someone called.  Then, in a lighter tone, “Niel hyung!  Hello!”

            “Up10tion fighting!” Niel called encouragingly.

            Hwanhee called, “I’m coming!” and then turned quickly to Sehun.  “I have to go, but I’ll have some time, before the ending stage.  Do you want anything?  Any water?  I can run and get you some snacks.”

            “What’s this?” Niel asked.  “No one offered me snacks.  I get thirsty, too.”

            “Oh, sorry,” Hwanhee said.  “Do you-”

            “He doesn’t want anything,” Sehun said.

            “I might want snacks!” Niel exclaimed.

            “I’ll bring everybody snacks,” Hwanhee promised.  “Okay?  Thank you, sunbaenims, please look after us!”

            Sehun watched him jog away.

            Niel gave Sehun a pointed look.  “I don’t want to tell you how to run your life.  But you need to get a grip.”

            “Are you around him a lot?” Sehun asked.  Never mind; if Teen Top was around him at all, it was a problem.  “I need to talk to you.”

            “I think their dressing room is empty.”

            They went down the hallway.  The dressing room wasn’t empty at all; it was crammed full of rookies.  And they all leapt to their feet, bowing and flustered, when Niel and Sehun walked in.

            Once Niel and Sehun had escaped that, they went down to EXO’s dressing room.  Sehun’s hyungs tried to tease him about seeing Hwanhee, but he pulled Niel into the corner by the make-up table.  “You can’t treat him like any dongsaeng.”

            “I tried to be nice!  I know how it goes.”

            “It’s not the same.  Hwanhee’s different.  You can’t ask him to do things for you.  And you can’t take advantage when he offers.”

            “I can’t have snacks?”

            Sehun rolled his eyes.  “Get your own goddamned snacks.”

            Niel looked comically affronted.

            “He likes to do things for me.”  Sehun felt like he was exposing something really personal, something he wanted to protect.  But anyone who spent five minutes around him and Hwanhee was bound to notice it; he wasn’t giving away anything that Hwanhee hadn’t already exposed.  “It’s part of his…thing.  So he offers to get me water or snacks or whatever.”

            Niel studied him warily.  “These,” he covered his mouth with one hand, “relationships,” he lowered his hand again, “that you get into are very strange.  I’m starting to think it’s you, not them.”

            “Just don’t ask him to do things for you, okay?  Don’t take advantage of him.  And keep your members off of him.”

            “We’re not allowed to do that, anyway,” Niel said.  Jinhoo’s rules.”

            Good.  Hwanhee had said that before, that he wasn’t invited along when his hyungs went to see Teen Top, and Sehun approved.

            He wondered why he approved.

            What did he think that Teen Top was going to do to Hwanhee?  They’d known Hwanhee for longer than he had.  They were sexually aggressive, but they also had experience with Hwanhee’s particular kind of need.

            He didn’t want Niel on Hwanhee because he didn’t want anyone on Hwanhee.  He was possessive as hell and he’d never seen his pet with another man.  But he didn’t control that part of Hwanhee’s life.  He didn’t get to decide who his pet had sex with or dated or hung out with or any of it.

            “Is it all right?” Niel asked.  “The thing going on with the dongsaeng, it’s working out?”

            He nodded.  He had a tight feeling in his chest, just thinking about it.  Proud and yearning, all at once.  “It’s perfect.”

            “Good.  Stop assaulting people in public, all right?  You’re going to get a reputation.”

            “Sorry.”

            They were still talking a while later when there was a light tapping at the open door.  He looked over.

            Hwanhee stood there, hesitant on the threshold, staring around at all of Sehun’s members.  “Is it okay?” he whispered across the room to Sehun.  “Can I come in?”

            His hands were full.

            “God, fuck you,” Sehun muttered to Niel.  “Yeah, dongsaeng-ah, come in,” he said, getting up.

            Bowing, saying hello to everyone on the way, Hwanhee crossed the room.  Everyone said hi back, some of them shooting Sehun amused looks, a couple of them checking Hwanhee out.  Sehun shot Chen a territorial, warning look, and Chen gave him a shrug.

            “I didn’t know what you’d like,” Hwanhee said.  He spoke in a hushed voice as he set everything down on the table.  “Well, I knew what Niel hyung would like, we get drinks for the Teen Top hyungs all of the time.”

            Behind his back, Sehun glared at Niel, and Niel gave him a helpless look back.  “I didn’t know,” Niel whispered.

            Hwanhee handed Niel an iced coffee, then glanced between their faces.  “Is everything okay?  I’m interrupting,” he said, cringing.

            “No, everything’s fine, Niel’s just leaving,” Sehun said.  “He’s busy, a very busy sunbae.”

            “Right,” Niel said slowly.  “I’ll, uh, I’ll go.  Very busy!”  He picked up a bag of chips, punched Sehun’s shoulder, and left with his iced coffee.

            “Sorry,” Hwanhee said, patting Sehun’s shoulder.  “The Teen Top hyungs hit a lot.  I brought you chips, and cookies.  Do you like this, or do you want something else to drink?”

            “This is great,” Sehun said.  Sitting down, he pushed Hwanhee into the other chair.  He sipped his coffee for Hwanhee’s sake, and then he said, “It’s nice that you want to do things for your hyungs, but you don’t have to.”

            “No, I want to, it’s okay.  It’s a dongsaeng’s job, right?”

            “But you don’t have to,” Sehun said.  “Especially not with me.  You don’t have to do anything for me.  You can walk right past me, ‘Hey, hyung,’ and not worry about it.  I can get my own snacks, okay?”

            “Okay.”  Hwanhee frowned at Sehun like he wasn’t sure where this was coming from.  “I want to, though.”

            “I know.  And thank you,” Sehun said.  “But you don’t have to.”

            “I want to.”  He hesitated, shifting in his seat.  “Do you not like it?”

            “It’s not about me, it’s about you.”

            “But everything’s about you,” he said, laughing.  Then he blushed, cringing.  “Oh, god,” he whispered, leaning closer, his cheeks red.  “Am I embarrassing you?”

            “No, no.”  He had no idea how to get through to his pet.  He had to be too vague in public, and his pet was too determined.  He just started from the beginning again, leaning forward, one hand on Hwanhee’s knee.  He looked into Hwanhee’s attentive, trusting eyes.  “It’s nice that you want to do things for your hyungs.  But you don’t have to.  Especially me.”

            “But I want to,” he said again.  “You don’t want me to,” he said, frowning.  “Well, I’ll just do it anyway,” he decided.  “You can just ignore it if you don’t like it.  You don’t have to eat the chips, they’re just there, if you want some.”

            “You’re here for Up10tion, for your fans, not for me.  You don’t have to do anything for me, you didn’t come here to see me.  Everything doesn’t have to be about me just because I’m around.”

            “But I have time.  I don’t have to be back onstage for a while, we’re not doing anything.”  He blushed.  “But I’ll go.”  He got up, rubbing his hands on his jeans.  “I’ll be down the hall if you want anything else, just let me know.”

            “Do you want to go?” Sehun asked.

            He winced.  “No.”

            Sehun nudged his thigh.

            He sat down again, smiling.  “Am I bothering your members?” he whispered.  “Everybody’s so quiet.”

            “They’re just old and tired,” Sehun said.

            “Oh, hi,” Chanyeol said.

            Sehun looked over.  Kuhn was in the doorway with a broad, self-conscious smile.  “Hello,” Kuhn said, bowing.  “Sorry,” he gestured towards Hwanhee.  “I lost a dongsaeng.”

            “I’m not lost,” Hwanhee argued.  “I told the members where I was going.”

            “You told Xiao,” Kuhn said.  “Telling the maknae doesn’t count.”

            Hwanhee’s fine in here,” Suho said.  “You can leave him with us.”

            “You can come in,” Baekhyun said.

            “I don’t know, we’re all so old and tired, we might be too boring,” Xiumin said.

            Niel was just in here,” Lay said.  “You’re close with him, right?”

            “How close would you say you are?” Xiumin asked.  “Out of your members, are you one of his favorites?”

            “Are you one of C.A.P.’s favorites?” Chanyeol asked.  “For example?”

            “I, uh.”  Kuhn looked around, blushing.  “I guess Chunji hyung likes me.”

            “Really,” Xiumin said, sliding to the end of the couch.  C’mere.”

            “Xiumin hyung and Chunji hyung are close, aren’t they?” Hwanhee whispered to Sehun.  “I was always so jealous, before.  I couldn’t wait to debut and get to meet big sunbaes.  Chunji hyung’s so cool, he hangs out with guys like Xiumin sunbae and Dongwoo sunbae, older sunbaes, all of the time.  And Changjo hyung was always going to your dorm and going to dinner with Suho sunbae.”

            “And L hyung,” Sehun added, just to provoke him.

            He blushed.  “Don’t tease me about that.  It was before I met you.  I didn’t know anything.”

            Sehun wanted to touch him.  “My members are great.  And it’s good that you’re close with Teen Top.  But a lot of other idols are jerks, okay?  Even good-looking sunbaes who seem funny on variety shows.  Keep your head down and focus on work, all right?  Don’t pay too much attention to the idols who smile at you in the hallway.”

            “But everybody at your company’s okay, right?  I mean, Shinee sunbaenim, they’re amazing.”

            “Well, yeah, Shinee’s great.  I mean other idols.”

            Hwanhee gave him a puzzled look.

            “Hey.”  Chen was coming over.  “Can I have these chips?”

            “Yeah,” Sehun said, giving them to him.  “Just stay away from my cookies.”

            “I’ll stay away from your cookies,” Chen teased, taking the chips.  “Thanks.”

            Hwanhee opened his mouth.

            “Don’t offer to do things for him,” Sehun said, pushing Chen aside.

            “Maknae!” Chen protested, laughing, but he walked away again.

            Hwanhee kicked his feet slightly, studying Sehun.  “Can we talk in private later?”

            Sehun wondered what he wanted to talk about.  “Yeah.  Is everything okay?”

            “Oh, yeah.  I just want to ask some things that I can’t figure out how to ask in front of everybody.  It’s hard to know what to say and how to say it.”

            Sehun probably wasn’t helping.  He was all over the map.  Too protective, too territorial.  “I didn’t expect to see you today.  I didn’t realize you were performing tonight.  Seeing you so suddenly surprised me.”

            “Is it weird?  Is it bad?” Hwanhee asked.  “Should I pretend I don’t know you, is that what’s wrong?”

            “No!”  He and his pet still had a lot to learn about each other.  “No, it’s not that.”  They really did have to talk.  “What are you doing after this?”

            “Practice.”

            “Okay, give me a second.”  Sehun got up.  “Drink my coffee and don’t do anything for anybody.”

            Hwanhee grinned at him.  “Can I eat your cookies?”

            Sehun picked them up and walked away with them.  His hyungs were clustered around Kuhn on the couch, flirting.  Kuhn looked flattered but kind of overwhelmed.  He waited for his hyungs to stop talking, but he got impatient.  “Hey, you have practice tonight, after this?”

            “Um, yeah,” Kuhn said, looking up.

            “Can I stop by for a minute?  I want to talk to Hwanhee.”

            “Uh, I don’t know.  I’d have to check with Jinhoo.”

            “Yeah, and don’t you have to check with somebody, too?” Suho asked from across the room.

            Oh, hell.  Sehun turned around, trying not to roll his eyes.  Hwanhee was his pet, he shouldn’t have to go around asking everyone he knew for permission to see his own goddamned pet.  If people would just fucking respect-

            “Don’t roll your eyes, maknae.  Do you just want to stop by?” Suho asked.  Before Sehun could answer, he said, “I think that’s good.  Little visits are good, too, it doesn’t always have to be a big event.  It’s good to stay in touch.  I’ll talk to Jinhoo about it.”

            “Really?”  Why was Suho so permissive when it came to Hwanhee?

            Mmm.  I think it’ll be good for you.”  He just sat there for a minute, and then he said, “Oh!  I could talk to him now, couldn’t I?  He’s right down the hallway.  Well, he might be busy,” he mused, getting up.  “I remember being a rookie with so many members!”

            “Yeah, before we were so old and tired,” Xiumin said.

            Apparently Sehun was going to be hearing about that all day.

            While Suho left, Sehun went back to sit with Hwanhee.  “Did you drink anything?”

            “Yes,” Hwanhee said.

            “Because you wanted it or because I told you to?”

            “Because you told me to.”

            He flicked Hwanhee’s forehead.  “Don’t do that!  I’m just your hyung, you don’t have to listen to me.”

            Ow!”  Hwanhee rubbed his forehead, then pulled his bangs down over it.  “I do so have to listen to you, I have to listen to all of my hyungs.  Try not listening to hyungs for a day and see if you’re still alive by the end of it.”

            “Okay, so I’m a hyung you don’t have to listen to.”

            Hwanhee laughed.  “There isn’t any such thing.”  Then his eyes lit up.  “Do you want to play permanent yaja time?  I could be your hyung!”

            “No,” he said immediately.

            Hwanhee laughed at him.  “See, you like being in charge.”

            “I’m not in charge of you.”  Not outside of a scene.  No matter how strongly his instincts told him otherwise.

            “I think you don’t know what you want,” Hwanhee said.

            “I like this kid,” D.O. said.

            Sehun shot D.O. a look and turned back to Hwanhee.  “Fine, what do you want?”

            “Oh.”  Hwanhee pulled out his phone.  “I made a list, what do you think?”

            This pet and his lists.  Curious, Sehun read.  Under the heading of “Travel Pack,” Hwanhee had written: hand sanitizer, hand lotion, chapstick, BB cream, powder, Sharpie, toothbrush, toothpaste, lozenges, vitamins, bottled water, chips, cookies, oranges???  Sehun studied it, then nodded and handed the phone back to him.  “Looks good.  What’s it for?”

            “For you,” Hwanhee said, like he should’ve known that.  “For days I might run into you.  I didn’t know about today, but I can check your schedule so I know when I might see you.  Is it on your company website somewhere?  Never mind, your fans will have it.  I can have this ready, like a kit, so I’ll be ready in case you need anything.  What did I forget, what else would you want?  Are the oranges okay, would you like those?  Or bananas, maybe, do you get leg cramps?”

            Hwanhee-ah.”  Sehun didn’t know what to do with him.  God, they really had to talk.

            “Energy bars,” he said to himself, typing it in.  “Most of it’s small, I won’t need a big bag, I don’t think.  I can fit all of that in my backpack and carry that around.”

            “You can’t carry a whole backpack around just in case you run into one person.”

            “Just on days like today, when we might run into each other.”  He studied his list thoughtfully, then looked up at Sehun and laughed.  “I can’t think of anything else!  I don’t know, what kind of stuff are you always forgetting?”

            Sehun didn’t know what to say to him.

            “You hate it,” he guessed.  He sighed, sitting back in his chair.  “Well, whatever.  I’ll do it anyway.  Then if you need hand sanitizer, and Up10tion’s in the building, you’ll know where to get it.”

            He was trying so hard, and Sehun was crushing him, and he was powering forward, anyway.  He was so earnest and so hopeful and so sincere, and he was being pushed and pulled, claimed and rejected, and he was just doing his best, and now Sehun was making him miserable and he was trying to get through it.  His mission to be Sehun’s servant was something he’d latched onto, something he’d committed to and understood, and while he didn’t know what Sehun wanted from him and he was getting all kinds of conflicting messages, he at least knew how to do this.  So he was sticking with it, even while his certainty in it crumbled under Sehun’s rudeness and confusion.

            They were both trying to figure all of this out.  But Sehun had all of the power here, all of the experience and maturity and perspective.  Hwanhee had nothing but heart, and he refused to give up.  He couldn’t make sense of Sehun, so he was just doing what he knew.  Even when Sehun was an unappreciative ass, telling him no at every turn, pushing him to stop and give up.

            He had to be hurting so much on the inside.  Sehun could see it, his pain, his frustration, the cracks forming.  He put on such a brave face.  Always telling himself that it was okay, it was okay, everything would be okay.  Even when his prince was fucking up his world.

            He’d just wanted to see his prince.  Sehun had harassed one of his favorite hyungs.  Had told Hwanhee to stop trying, stop giving, stop offering, stop planning, stop doing everything he’d based their relationship around.

            Sehun had to figure out how to balance their everyday relationship, their hyung-dongsaeng dynamic, without hurting him.

            He was slouching in the chair, looking uncertain, slowly spinning his phone on the table.  Were there dogs all over his phone case?  Sehun hadn’t really noticed that, before.  They looked like happy, playful puppies.

            He’d only gotten his phone after he’d started meeting Sehun.

            Were those dogs a coincidence?  Knowing how strongly he reacted to dog paraphernalia, now, Sehun found that really hard to believe.

            He’d put their relationship on his phone case.  For anyone and everyone to see.  It would never mean anything to anyone else, it wasn’t a signal anyone else would catch.  But it was there.  Right out in the open.  On a constant part of his everyday life.

            Maybe Sehun was reading too much into it.  Hwanhee-ah.”  Instantly, his eyes lifted, hopeful, attentive.  God, that felt amazing, and, god, that was dangerous.  Keenly aware of how precious his pet’s devotion was, Sehun tried to speak naturally.  “I like your phone case, where’d you get it?”

            “Oh.”  He blushed bright red, smiling, sitting up straighter.  “Just at some store.  I didn’t know what to choose, I didn’t really like anything, and then I saw this one.”  His smile was pleased, bashful.  “It’s weird, right?”

            “It’s cute.”  Sehun had been too tense, earlier.  Too possessive, too careful, too worried and protective.  He took a deliberate moment to look at Hwanhee now, to let reality sink in.  He was here with his pet.  His pet was with him, and happy to see him, and earnestly eager to please him.

            Watching Hwanhee, he felt lust stir in him.  He wanted to touch, to possess.  He wanted to reach out and pull Hwanhee’s chair closer.  Pull his pet closer.  His gaze fell on his pet’s full lower lip.  On his pet’s firm chin.  Places he wanted to bite.  He wanted to yank his pet across his lap.  Wanted to sink his teeth in.  Wanted to make his pet gasp and moan and thank him.  His pet was so, so good at thanking him.

            Hwanhee squirmed in his chair.  So good at squirming, too.  Why wasn’t he squirming on Sehun’s cock?  “I don’t know what to do,” he said.  “I don’t know how to help you here.”

            His pet knew that he was turned on.  His pet was always so attentive, so responsive, such a good pet.  “You look good today.”  His eyeliner, his contouring, it dressed up his eyes, made his cheekbones stand out.  Sehun wanted to lick his face.  Come on his face, come all fucking over it.  “I like your lip gloss.”

            Hwanhee smiled at him, looking aroused, flattered, anxious, hopeful.  “Is it nice?  Is this how you like it?”

            “Pretty.”  Sehun’s fingers curled around the arm of his chair, his grip tight as he clung to his self-control.  His pet was too earnest, too innocent.  His pet should be kneeling, looking up at him, those glossy, pink lips parted, eager for his cock.  Desperate for his cock.  Worshiping him.

            Hwanhee frowned, glancing down.  Then his expression cleared and he smiled at Sehun, getting up.  “We’ve had a pretty busy day today.”  He brushed the snacks aside and sat on the table, close to Sehun.  “This is our third show today, did I tell you that?”

            His pet had moved closer to him.  He liked that.  As his pet continued speaking, he closed his eyes and just listened to the flow of words.  He liked his pet’s cheerful, confiding tone, the dramatic up and down as his pet exaggerated a point or made a joke.  “Keep going,” he murmured, opening his eyes.

            His pet smiled at him and kept talking.  Kogyeol hyung said that it was just a coincidence, but I think it was real, anyway!  I think they really liked us.  Is it okay to say that with my own mouth?  We got to eat backstage, thank god, I was starving, and…”

            His pet was so close, he could touch.  Reaching out, he wrapped his hand around his pet’s ankle.  Slim, bare ankle.  His pet’s voice caught, but the flow of words continued bravely on.

            He stroked his pet’s smooth skin.  Such a sweet, tender pet.  Sehun dug his nails in.

            “…so then we ya-ah, we, uh, we went to the other dressing room.”  Hwanhee laughed, his cheeks bright with color.  “Yeah, um, so I guess they just had the signs all messed up.  I don’t know how often that happens or how it usually goes, but I’m glad they straightened it out, right?”

            Sehun raked his nails over his pet’s skin.  Scratched up and down, slowly, repetitively, on either side of his pet’s Achilles tendon.  Over.  And over.  And over again.

            “…but I just, uh, I just.”  Hwanhee was struggling, really struggling, not to squirm, not to moan, not to respond.  Sehun could see it in him, how affected he was, how badly he wanted to react, how determined he was to be a good pet, to cover for Sehun, to maintain appearances.  It felt good, so fucking good, to touch him, to hurt him, to make him suffer.  To see him take it, and endure it, let Sehun do this.  He could move away, he could ask Sehun to stop, he could simply get up.  There was nothing keeping him there but the minor fact that Sehun wanted him there, and so he was staying.

            Sehun scratched him more lightly, then harder, harder, nails digging in and slowly dragging across his skin.  He coughed, both hands gripping the edge of the table.  “But this is a really nice dressing room.  You get so much space!  When we get this much space, we have to share it with two other groups.  You deserve it, though, you’ve worked so hard, you’re all so talented.  It’s not that bad having to share, anyway, we get to know a lot of other idols that way!”  He swallowed, pulling at the front of his shirt, trying to cool off.

            “Okay, members,” Suho called.  “Come on, it’s time.”

            Sehun stood up.  He immediately put his back to Hwanhee, because if he looked at his pet, he’d do something he shouldn’t.  He just stood there for a moment, breathing, getting himself under control, forcing his body to calm down.

            “Maknae!” Chanyeol called.

            “Yeah,” he called back.  Softly, he said, “I need you to stay away from me.  I’ll try to come and talk to you tonight.”

            “Okay,” Hwanhee whispered.

            He walked away.  His need to possess his pet and his triumph in having dominated his pet were so fresh, the raw hunger and intense high stayed with him, even onstage.  He threw himself into the choreography, giving it his all, and when it was over, he wanted to run out into the cheering crowd, wanted to dive into EXO-L’s embrace.

            They were the last to perform, and when all of the other idols came out for the ending stage, he searched for Up10tion.  He didn’t roam around being obvious about it, but he walked around his members, looking in all directions.  Finally, he saw Wei, and then - - there, in yellow, waving cheerfully to the crowd, laughing at Gyujin.

            It hit him, then, what he’d done.  His pet’s happy, innocent face shocked him into the realization.  He’d dominated his pet in public.  He’d hurt his pet in public.  Oh, god.  Blood drained out of him and he grabbed onto Kai, disoriented by the screaming crowd.  He’d just done the one thing he’d sworn he’d never, ever do.  And he hadn’t even asked Hwanhee first, he’d just done it, he’d just taken it as his right.  He hadn’t even established a scene, hadn’t said “badminton.”  He’d been so worried about how blurry the lines were in this relationship, and then he’d stormed across all of them because his fucking hormones, his fucking ego, were taking over his brain.

            Shaken, as soon as they were offstage, he asked Suho about meeting Hwanhee that night.  He had to see his pet, they had to talk.  Distracted, Suho said, “Yes, yes, it’s fine, maknae, you can go over to their practice room later, it’s been arranged.”

            In the dressing room, he was preoccupied by his own thoughts, in a cloud of regrets and desires and warring impulses.

            And then he saw that his phone, his drink, and his cookies had been stacked neatly together on one side of the table.  On the bag of cookies, someone had left a sticky note.  “Oh cookies!  Only for Oh Sehun to eat!”

            Affection surged so strongly in him that he smiled, reaching out, touching the note.  For a moment, he forgot about everything else and just re-read the note.  He’d left to go onstage and his pet had done this for him, had set his things aside from the dressing room jumble, had tried to shield his cookies from his members.  His pet was always thinking of him.  Always coming up with more ways to take care of him.

            If his pet was going to be this devoted to taking care of him, then he had to do a better job of returning the favor.  He had to get his shit together.  Or he didn’t deserve to have this pet at all.



            “But what time, exactly?” Hwanhee asked.  This was important!

            “I don’t know,” Jinhoo said.  “Suho sunbae said that they have a meeting, and they’re going to need to stop for dinner.  He said that it would be sometime after eleven.”

            “But that could be eleven oh one!  That could be three in the morning!”  It might be any second now!  It might be after he’d been practicing for hours and he was all gross and sweaty!

            Ya,” Kogyeol said.  “Shouldn’t you be grateful that you get to see him at all?  I don’t get to miss practice just to see some guy, neither does anybody else.”

            Hwanhee flushed with guilt.

            “That’s enough,” Jinhoo said.  “Suho sunbae asked for a special favor, and I’ve agreed to it.  If Sehun sunbae had asked for you, you’d get to meet him.  He asked for Hwanhee, and that’s how it is.  Now, let’s start practice, no more interruptions.”

            “I’ll work hard,” Hwanhee promised.  “I’ll work twice as hard to make up for any time I miss.  I can stay late-”

            “It’s fine, it’ll only be a few minutes,” Kuhn said, squeezing his shoulder and pushing him towards his starting spot.  “Don’t worry about it, Kogyeol’s just getting cocky.  He’s excited that we get to practice more than you do tonight, and you’ll be stuck hanging out with some guy while we’ll be in here dancing.  He shouldn’t lord it over you like that.  Not cool,” Kuhn said, nudging Kogyeol.

            “Yeah, sorry, my fault,” Kogyeol said with a confused laugh.

            Hwanhee knew what Kogyeol had really meant, though, and he’d been right.  It wasn’t fair to the other members for Hwanhee to miss practice while they worked so hard.  When Jinhoo called a break, he gave Xiao money for the vending machine, and then he kept practicing through the break, trying to make up for the time he’d miss later.

            At the end of the break, Xiao came back.  “I got water and snacks and stuff, I put them in the other practice room, are you going to see him in there?”

            “Yeah, thank you.”  He was grateful to Xiao for helping him out; he wanted to prepare for his prince’s visit.  EXO members came around, sometimes, to see Teen Top, but this was the first real royal visit, and he wanted to be ready.  “You got the cookies?”

            “Yes, I got the cookies,” Xiao said, laughing.  “You already told me to get them ten times.  Can I have whatever he doesn’t eat?”

            “Yeah, sure.”  Or should he save it for next time?  No, he’d just get fresh stuff next time.  Princes didn’t eat leftovers!

            They were in the middle of a song when Jinhoo’s phone rang and he stepped aside.  They kept dancing around Jinhoo’s empty spot.  Hwanhee was sure that Sehun was calling, but kept working hard, anyway, not wanting to seem unprofessional, not wanting to mess up and let everyone down and prove what a distraction Sehun was.

            As the song ended, Jinhoo gestured him over.  “Sehun sunbae’s here, he’s coming up.”

            Bitto made a sound like a flourish of trumpets, and Wooshin said, “Oh my god, dry off,” and Sunyoul said, “Yeah, stop in the bathroom first and wash your face, maybe.”

            He felt too guilty to respond to their advice and teasing.  “I won’t take long,” he said, edging towards the door.  “And don’t worry, I’ll stay late, I’ll make up for it.”

            “It’s fine, just go,” Kuhn said.  “Enjoy your, uh, prince.”

            He slipped out, closing the door.  He rushed into the bathroom, splashed cool water on his face, couldn’t find any paper towels, dried off with a handful of toilet paper, and then realized that he’d totally fucked up his make-up.  Oh, god, now he looked worse!  He gave himself a rushed scrub, and he got all of the foundation and everything off, but his eyeliner was a black smudge.

            He was keeping his prince waiting!  He gave up on his eyeliner and rushed out.

            Sehun was in the hallway.  Just standing there, hanging back, watching Hwanhee’s members through the window.  He looked unbearably chic, so handsome, long and lean.  He only had on jeans and a T-shirt, but the way the T-shirt draped over his broad shoulders made it look like a luxury item.

            From down the hallway, Hwanhee was torn.  Torn between the desire to kneel down and humbly submit to him, assuming the position and letting him take control, and the urge to run forward and hug him, say hi, bask in his smile.  He was a prince, not some everyday hyung, but he was Hwanhee’s hyung, he was a hyung who hugged, and laughed, and said nice, comforting things that made Hwanhee’s whole life easier.

            It was amazing that he was here, at practice.  Hwanhee spent thirty hours a day here, it seemed like, lived more here than at the dorm.  Hwanhee was used to being here during the day, during the night, when it was hot, when it was cold, when the building was alive with members and sunbaes and dance-offs and games of catch in the hallways, when the whole place was dark and deserted and even their manager had gone home but they were still there, forcing themselves to get it right.  He’d been a determined trainee and now he was an even more determined idol, and these rooms were his life, and now his prince was here.  It made Sehun seem more real.  Not only a fairy tale prince, but an actual part of everyday life.

            Wondering, he approached.  When Sehun turned and saw him, he blushed, bowing.  “Hi.”

            “Hi.”  Sehun put his hands in his pockets and smiled.

            “We can talk in here,” Hwanhee offered.  Oh, he hadn’t finished preparing!  He didn’t know how Xiao had left things.  “In here,” he repeated, and he hurried ahead.

            There was a bottle of water and cola and chips and crackers just dumped on a chair.  Hwanhee snatched everything up and dusted off the seat with his hand.  Here.

            Sehun closed the door.  “Do you want the chair?”

            “No, it’s for you.”  He didn’t get the question.

            “If there’s only one.”  Sehun didn’t finish speaking, he just sat on the floor, leaning back against the wall.

            Hwanhee set the drinks and snacks beside him, then sat on his other side.

            “You want some?” Sehun asked, holding out the bottle of water.

            Um.  Well, yeah, kind of, actually.  He hadn’t stopped for a break with the other members, and he hadn’t had water or anything at all in hours.  “It’s for you.”

            “Well, I want to share.”  Sehun cracked open the cola and took a sip.

            Hwanhee eyed the water.

            “Let me see your ankle.”

            He blushed.  It seemed like such a private thing, he didn’t want to show anybody.  But he could show his prince.  Shy, ashamed, turned on, he tugged up the leg of his pants, raising his knee and turning his leg to show the back of his ankle.

            It was still bright red.  It still hurt, if he bumped it.  He loved knowing that it was there.  A secret, private spot on his body where his prince had been.

            Sehun rubbed his eyes.  Screwing up his face, he leaned his head back against the wall.  “I’m sorry.”

            Uncertainty began to strip away his pleasure.  “Sorry for what?”

            “I’m sorry that I hurt you,” Sehun said.  “I’m sorry that I did it to you in public.”  He dragged his hand through his hair, looking conflicted.  “I’m sorry that I liked it.”  He looked lost.  Hwanhee wasn’t used to seeing him like this.  “I’m sorry that I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.  I don’t know how to do this with you.”

            Hwanhee picked up the bottle and drank some water.  He was going to need to be fortified for this.

            “The last guy I was with,” Sehun said.  “It was clearer with him.  We had the way things were in private, when it was just us, and then we had the way things were the rest of the time.  We understood each other, there were boundaries.  It’s different, with you, and it’s giving me excuses to fuck up.”

            “Because I’m younger.”

            “Yeah,” Sehun said.  “But there are other things, too.  You’re just different.  I don’t know which rules to keep from before and which ones to change.  I don’t know what’s too strict and what’s too lenient.  I want to tell you to stop doing things for me and stop trying to serve me when we’re not in a scene, but if you stop it just because I say so, then you’re still only doing what I want the way I want it, and I’m making you unhappy.  But if I let you serve me all of the time, that’s not fair to you, either, it’s too much.”

            “If I serve you, then I’m working hard to please you,” he said.  “And if you say, ‘stop doing that,’ and I stop, then I’m still working hard to please you.”  Was that what Sehun meant?

            “Right.  So we’re screwed.”

            “If you tell me to stop it, and I do it anyway, then I’m disobeying.  And that’s terrible, inside the scene, so it’s good, out of it?  Is that what you want?  For me to disobey you?  But you’re a sunbae!  You’re my hyung.”  Frustrated, he pulled the leg of his pants back down.  “Why can’t I just serve you?  You’re a prince, I’m your servant, that’s what I’m supposed to do.”

            “You don’t serve Gyujin.”

            Gyujin’s not a prince!”

            “I’m not a prince.”

            He shook his head, not willing to accept that.  “You’re always my prince.  And you’re always my owner.  You own me,” he reminded Sehun.  “You don’t stop owning something depending on which room you’re in or what time of day it is.  I own these shoes, they’re mine, they don’t stop being mine if I take them off or even if I let somebody else borrow them and wear them, they’re always mine.  And I’m always yours.  And you’re always my owner, and my prince.”

            Sehun stared at Hwanhee for a second, and then he said, “God.”  It seemed like Sehun thought that Hwanhee had gone too far, but how was that possible?  Hwanhee had only said facts, only stated what they’d already agreed on.  “Okay,” Sehun said, taking his hand.  Thrown by the unexpected touch, he closed his fingers around Sehun’s, not wanting Sehun to let go too soon.  “But I’m also your hyung.  When do I get to be that?”

            “After the scene.  When you hug me and let me yell at you.  That’s not about princes, so much, you’re a hyung then.”

            “I like that,” Sehun said.  “I like being just a hyung to you, sometimes.  I want you to feel like you can be that open with me, and grab my hand if you want, and scold me if you need to.”

            It was really nice to hear.  It was reassuring to know that Sehun liked all of the sides of their relationship, and not just using him.  He really, really loved being used, and it was incredibly important to him to be a loyal fuckhole, but it made him feel good to know that Sehun saw something good in him besides that.  “I like it, too.”

            “Maybe you should do whatever you want,” Sehun said.  “Do whatever you’re comfortable with.  If you want to bring me a drink, you can, and if you want to just talk to me, you can, and if you’re too busy for me, that’s okay, too.  You should get to treat me however you want, and that should be up to you.  It just.”  He sighed, bringing their joined hands onto his thigh.  “I don’t know how I’m supposed to treat you.”

            “How do you treat your other dongsaengs?”

            “I don’t have a lot of them.  I have some, and there are some guys like NCT, but that’s not the same.  They’re nothing like you.”

            “I don’t know if that’s good or if it pisses me off,” he mused.  Still holding onto Sehun’s hand, he twisted around, leaning across Sehun’s body, resting against Sehun’s chest, his head on Sehun’s shoulder.  “Is it good that I don’t have a lot of competition?  But why won’t they treat you right, why aren’t there more people who serve you?”

            Sehun’s left hand touched Hwanhee’s hair, and it felt so nice, he hummed under his breath.  “Maybe because I’m not a real prince.”

            “Stop lying.  I know you’re a real one.”  He smiled to himself.  “A real prince.  From a real kingdom.  Maybe it’s on a tiny, secret island so far off the coast we’ve never found it.  And you escaped to Korea undercover, and everyone’s fooled.  They think you’re so handsome and so chic and so sexy because you’re an idol.  They don’t even realize that secretly, you’re a prince.”

            “Oh, only you figured it out?” Sehun asked, stroking his hair.

            Mmm.  Yeah.  Just me.  And EXO-L,” he added, looking up at Sehun.  “I think that EXO-L knows.  They’d better be careful, they might give away the secret.”

            Sehun laughed, giving his hair a little tug.  It made his toes curl.  The way Sehun smiled at him made him feel happy, and slutty, and fantastic.  “What am I undercover for?  What am I doing here?”

            “Oh, I can’t know that.”  That was obvious!  “I’m just a servant, that’s private royal business.  I’m just glad that I figured out your secret identity, so I can serve you like you deserve.  You probably have a ton of official royal fuckholes back home, all lined up desperate to serve you.  There’s only one of me!  I’ll have to work really hard,” he decided.  “I’ll have to be a really good servant to make up for it.”

            “You’re already a good servant.”  Sehun stroked the back of his neck.  It made him warm, made pleasure tingle all through him.  “And you’re my favorite fuckhole.”

            Really?  “Your favorite?” he asked eagerly.

            “My real favorite.”  Sehun’s thumb rubbed over his nape.  “This is what I mean about boundaries.  I don’t know what’s too far with you.  You don’t think that anything’s too far, you’ll keep going.  If I ask for anything, you’ll give it to me, and even if I hold back and don’t ask, you’ll offer it.  So I have to put the brakes on, but when?  It seems like just flirting, but I don’t want to start something I can’t finish.  I don’t want to turn you on and make you want me if you can’t have me.  I know it hurts, I know it’s hard on you, I know it’s not fair, and I don’t want to do that to you.  But you’re so easy to turn on, and you want me all of the time, and it’s so hard to hold back when I’m with you.  I want to give you everything.”  Sehun’s voice lowered, his thumbnail dragging across Hwanhee’s skin.  “I want to take everything.”

            He shuddered, pleasure pulsing between his thighs, the sharp pain feeling so good his back arched.  Ahh-hh.”  He gasped, his eyes closing.

            “Fuck,” Sehun whispered, and he sat up straighter, kissed the back of Hwanhee’s neck, pushed Hwanhee up until they were eye-to-eye.  “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, pet, this is what I’m talking about.  It’s my fault, this is my fault, I never control myself around you.”  Confused, ashamed, Hwanhee started to pull away from him, and he grimaced, looking regretful.  “We want each other, and we respond to each other, and then I’m giving off signals and you’re responding to me, and that turns me on more, and then you want it even more, and it spirals too far and I go too far.  Any time I do that, I’m putting you at risk.  It might be the wrong time or the wrong place.  It feels so good, it feels too good, and I get carried away, and that can screw up your career.  Jinhoo already doesn’t trust me, and I keep proving him right.  It’s my fault, I’m the one who’s supposed to be in control.  I shouldn’t have hurt you in the dressing room, I shouldn’t have scratched you.  I put us in a scene without warning you or asking you first, I just did it, and that’s not okay.  It should always be clear when we’re in a scene, there should never be any question about that, and that’s up to me.  You’re not wrong, you shouldn’t ever feel guilty for responding to me.  For responding to anybody.  It’s my fault for turning you on when I know I can’t finish it.”

            “It’s my fault.”  He felt so ashamed, so frustrated.  “I’m a slut, I’m just like this, I’m always like this.”

            “You’re not a slut,” Sehun said.  “That’s not a real thing, that has nothing to do with you.  It’s just something I say, inside the scene.  I say a hell of a lot inside the scene that I’d never say to you, to the real Lee Hwanhee.”

            “But that is the real Lee Hwanhee,” he said, bewildered, angry.  “I’m Lee Hwanhee!  That’s me, that’s me on the floor doing all of those things for you, that’s me you’re fucking, this is still me right here.  I’m always Lee Hwanhee, and I’m always your pet, and I’m always a greedy, slutty fuckhole.  I can’t stop being myself, I thought it was finally okay to be myself, why do you keep telling me not to be myself?!”

            “No, no,” Sehun was saying, trying to pull him close.  Too upset, he shoved Sehun away, confused, betrayed.  “No, I’m sorry, you’re right, I’m sorry.”

            “Is it natural and healthy or not?” he demanded.  “I don’t know what you want from me!  You own me but I can’t act like it, you’re my prince but you don’t want me to serve you, it’s okay to be a huge, desperate slut but I can’t call myself a slut?  I was so upset and I felt so lonely and nobody ever understood me and I thought I’d always have to pretend not to be who I really am, and then you showed up and it was okay, it was all really okay, it all made sense.  I made sense!  You make me feel like it’s okay to feel this way and want those things.  It’s still hard, sometimes, it still gets really hard, but it’s not so lonely anymore, it’s not so painful and scary.  I can tell myself this is healthy, this is natural, Sehun hyung says this is okay, it’s okay for me to feel this way, it’s nobody’s business.”

            “It is okay,” Sehun said.  “Seriously, I mean that, it’s okay.  If you’re horny, however much sex you want, however many guys you want, whichever ways you want to get off, that’s all okay.  I just don’t want the label to upset you.  I didn’t call you a slut so you could beat yourself up about it.  I don’t want you to feel bad or call yourself names and feel worse.”

            “Having that to call myself.”  He stopped, thinking of how to describe it.  “Sometimes it makes me feel worse, but sometimes it makes me feel better.  Sometimes I hate it, god, I’m such a freaking slut, and sometimes I love it, like, god, yes, I’m such a greedy slut!  It’s not just the word, sometimes the word turns me on.  It’s feeling this way.  I hate being a slut whether or not that’s what I call it.”

            “You feel good about it when you’re getting what you need,” Sehun said.  “Is that when you like it?  You’re a,” he smiled tentatively, “a happy slut when you’re getting laid, and then you feel worse about it when you’re horny but you’re not getting laid?”

            “Yeah.  I guess, yeah.  When Kuhn hyung’s, you know, doing me,” he blushed, “and it feels amazing, I’m like, yes, god, I’m such a slut, god, more, more.  And then three days later I haven’t done anything since then and I’m so, so freaking horny, I could hump anything, I want cock more than I want food or sleep or water or anything, and I hate it.”

            “And that’s when you feel bad about yourself.”

            “Yeah.”  He felt really anxious, really ashamed, and he got wound up, he got tense.  “I can’t sleep like that, I just, I can’t relax.”

            Sehun pressed his lips together, looking grim.  “You need more sex,” he finally said.  “There isn’t some deep problem here, you just need to get laid more.  It’s so freaking simple.  Why aren’t you getting more sex?  What the hell is wrong with your members?  Are they all straight?”

            “We do have it, we have it sometimes.  All of the time!  They’re always making out and going down on each other.  Kuhn hyung fucks Kogyeol hyung all of the time, it’s amazing.  I used to stand in the doorway and watch,” he admitted, embarrassed.  “I didn’t want to interrupt!  I just watched and, you know.”

            “Jacked off,” Sehun said.

            “Yeah.”  He winced.  “But Xiao said I was being creepy.  I didn’t want to be rude!  I probably seemed like a pervert, just standing there, they probably thought it was gross.”

            “It’s not perverted, and it’s not creepy,” Sehun said.  “If they wanted privacy, they’d close the door.  It’s a dorm, they know who’s around, you weren’t doing anything wrong.  Xiao’s a jerk, tell him to shut up.”

            Sehun seemed really defensive.  Marveling, Hwanhee smiled, feeling better.  “Are you trying to protect my honor?”

            “I’m trying to protect your sexuality.”  Sehun stroked Hwanhee’s cheek.  He loved it when his prince touched him.  Skinship with this hyung felt amazing.  “You have a lot of members, but they’re all stupid, apparently.  I don’t want to be rude and I don’t want to badmouth your members, but it’s true, they’re clueless jerks,” Sehun said.

            “They’re not,” he argued, laughing.

            “They really are.  They don’t ask for enough sex.  And you don’t like to ask for it, either?”

            “I ask too much,” he insisted, embarrassed.  “I’m already a burden, I don’t want to make it worse.”

            “That’s bullshit, but we can work on that later,” Sehun said.  “Okay, so what you need is two members a day.  You’re going to have sex with two hyungs a day.  Then you know exactly who to ask.  Ten members, eight hyungs, so you’ll only have to ask Kuhn every four days.  And you’ll only ask Gyujin every four days.  That’s not even twice a week, necessarily.  If my hyungs only asked me for sex once every four days, it would seem like I’d never hear from them anymore.  We do it way more often than that.  This’ll be nothing.”

            This was so weird.  “It’s like a calendar?  Like a routine?”

            “Yes.  You can even plan it out ahead of time, which two you want to ask which day.  You can rotate through them in order.  And then if something happens and Jinhoo’s not around one day, you swap him with another hyung.  Or cycle Xiao in, or something, whatever works for you.”

            He’d still have to ask two hyungs every day!  But he could arrange which two.  And then he wouldn’t feel like he was always going around begging, because he’d know for sure that he hadn’t asked Kogyeol since Wednesday.  “But I can’t have that much sex.  I’d always be on Kuhn hyung’s bed, I can’t do that.”

            “You need your own lube,” Sehun said.  Jinhoo knows that.  Why can’t you have it, what’s wrong?”

            “I don’t know.  We’re not allowed.  We’ve asked, but he says that we do so much around the rest of the dorm, we don’t need it.”  He winced.  “Xiao-  Catching himself, remembering that he’d just pissed Sehun off about Xiao, he closed his mouth.

            “Xiao what?” Sehun demanded, looking annoyed already.

            “It’s not that bad!  Don’t take everything the wrong way.  You don’t have to be so rude about my members, I’d never say anything about yours.”  He hugged his knee.  “Xiao said that I’m too obsessed with anal.  I love doing all of that other stuff, too!  I mean, if I’m obsessed, I’m obsessed with giving head, too.  I’m not a picky slut.”  Sehun smiled at him.  “But I really do like anal, I can’t help it.  I like it more than the other members do, I like it more than anybody.”

            “So you don’t know Niel very well?” Sehun asked.

            He burst into laughter, shocked.  “Is that true?  About Niel hyung?  My hyungs said it but I thought they were just teasing, he can’t really - - Niel hyung?!”  It was one thing to hear it from Bitto.  It was totally different to hear it from someone in EXO!

            “There’s someone in every group who likes it more than the rest of the group,” Sehun said.

            It made sense.  It reminded him of what Kuhn had said to him.  There was always going to be one member who liked anal more than everyone else, and there was always going to be one member who liked movies better than everyone else did, and there was always going to be someone who liked himself better than everyone else did.  “Who is it in EXO?”  He blushed.  “Can I ask that?”

            “I would have to give you like three or four different names,” Sehun said.

            Fascinated, he slid closer.  “Is one of them yours?”

            “No!”  Suddenly Sehun was blushing.  His prince’s cheeks were red!  “I’m a top.  I have to bottom a lot because I’m the maknae, and my hyungs are-  He cut himself off and rubbed his mouth.  “I like bottoming, too.  I love it, sometimes, when it gets really good.”

            Hwanhee licked his lips.  He couldn’t believe that his prince was sharing all of these personal secrets with him!  “Do you have favorites?  Favorite members you like bottoming for, or that you like topping the most?”

            “Yes,” Sehun said.  “God, yes, some of them are great.  Who do you like topping the most?”

            Wooshin hyung.”  He didn’t even have to think about it.  “Or Sunyoul hyung, he sounds really sexy, I love that.  But Wooshin hyung, he’s so sexy, he makes me come really hard.  And he asks for it, more than the other hyungs do.”  He blushed.  “He likes to play with my cock,” he whispered.  He shouldn’t tell Sehun that, he shouldn’t talk about that outside of the team.  But it was true, and it was so, so hot.  “Sometimes we jack off together just so he can watch me come.”

            “Why don’t you have more members like that?” Sehun asked.

            He laughed.  “What is it like in EXO, if you think that’s how we should be?”

            “You don’t know anything about Teen Top, do you?”

            “What are you saying?” he demanded, laughing.  “What do you know about Teen Top?”

            Sehun laughed, too, flopping back against the wall.  “God, there’s so much I want to say.  I can’t tell you too much about EXO, either.  ‘What’s private is private.’”  He rolled his eyes when he said it.  “But my members are always horny and always screwing.  They have way more sex than you, and they’re never embarrassed about any of it.  And they’re not even half as sexy as you are.”  Sehun took his hand again.  “If I can get Jinhoo to pass around more lube, will you ask two hyungs a day?  I don’t care which two, any two, just two a day.”

            It seemed like a lot!  Every day?!  But even if they didn’t do the whole entire thing, even if he just made out and went down on two hyungs a day, that would still be fantastic.  And if he planned it out, he wouldn’t feel like such a burden.  It would seem more under control, when his needs felt so completely beyond his control.  “I think I could.  I can try.”

            “Okay.  Good.”  Sehun held his gaze.  “I’m sorry that I’m making things harder for you.  I’m sorry that I confuse you so much.  I want to protect you from everything, but you’re so brave, it seems like you don’t need my protection, so I screw up.  Please tell me to go to hell every time I do that.”

            “No!  No, you make everything easier.  It’s so, so much easier, everything is, since I met you.  It can be confusing, and there are still bad days, but it was so much worse, before.  I have a prince, now!  I never thought I’d find one, before.”  They were sharing so much, and opening up to each other so well, he wondered if he could ask for something.  “Can I ask you, uh.  He blushed, super ashamed.  Super freaking ashamed.  God, this was bad.  Just thinking about it was turning him on.  “You can say no, you should probably say no.  I really need you to say no.  But, uh.”

            “What?”  Sehun smiled, leaning closer.

            He squirmed, adjusting himself in his pants, squeezing Sehun’s hand.  “I want my own bowl.  My own dog bowl.  I really want one.  In my dorm.  To keep in my room.  So I can fuck it, sometimes.”

            “When I’m not around?”

            He nodded.  God, he was so turned on, it was showing!  Moaning, he tried to tug his shirt down to cover it.  “I really want it.  Just for sometimes.  When I’m thinking about you.  I want to do it like I did before, like I did for you.  I want to get on the floor and come in it.”

            “Have you tried it?”

            He shook his head.  “No, no.  I have bowls, other bowls, but they’re not right.  They’re,” he whispered it, “people bowls, food bowls, my members eat off of them.  I want a special bowl.”  He swallowed.  “A dog bowl.  I want you to say it’s okay, I want you to tell me I can.”

            “What if I say that you can’t?”

            He groaned, shifting uncomfortably, his cock pushing hard against the front of his pants.  “But I need it.”

            “Why can’t you use a cereal bowl?”

            “No,” he insisted.  “I’m a servant, I’m a pet.  A cereal bowl’s too nice, that’s too good for me, that’s what I’d use to feed you if you came over.  I need a dog bowl, on the floor, like an animal.  I’m a filthy slut, it has to be degrading.”

            “But you only want it so you can fuck it,” Sehun said.

            “Yes, I want to come in it.  I want to rub my cock all over it and get it all full of my jizz.  I want to moo like a cow and milk myself right into it.”

            “But that’s about your pleasure,” Sehun said.  “A real prince only cares about his own pleasure, not yours.  Are you being selfish?”

            “I’m a selfish, greedy slut,” he said immediately.

            Sehun smiled at him, tugging on his hand.  Immediately, he scooted closer, groaning as his cock strained against his pants.  Hwanhee-ah.  What do you want me to say?  Do you want me to give you permission, or not?”

            “No,” he said.  “Tell me no.  But I really need it!  Just, can you let me ask for it, sometimes?  I really, really want it, and I can’t stop thinking about it, I think about it all of the time, it’s like my number three fantasy.  I think about it more than I think about you fucking Lee Hongbin sunbaenim.  If I can ask you about it, maybe if I can talk about it, I won’t need it so much.”

            “You can ask me about it as much as you want,” Sehun said.  “Ask me about it any time, if we’re alone.  If you want to talk about it, I want to hear about it.”  Then Sehun smiled at him again.  “Stop worrying about Hongbin hyung, I’ve never even touched him.”

            “I want to hump a dog bowl,” Hwanhee said.  Just to say it.  Just to get it out there.  God, he felt so much better.

            “If that’s your third fantasy, what are the first two?”

            Oh.  “You.”

            Sehun grinned at him.  “And?  What’s the other one?”

            He hesitated.  He didn’t want to say it.  “You might think it’s insulting.  I don’t want to hurt your feelings.  I don’t think a servant can hurt a prince’s feelings,” he reasoned.  “But it might sound insulting.”

            “What is it?”

            “L sunbae.  I still, I think about him, sometimes.  Not the way I think of you!  He’s not a real prince.  But sometimes, I still dream about him, or I see him and it makes me think about him.”

            Sehun nodded.  “Fantasies are great.  I have a ton of fantasies, and a hell of a lot of them are about you.  But Hongbin hyung isn’t really my pet, and L hyung isn’t really a prince.  A lot of idols are nothing like they seem on TV.”

            That comment reminded him of something.  Hadn’t Sehun said this earlier?  That evening, in the dressing room, he’d asked about other idols.  He’d said something about Teen Top and EXO and Infinite members, and Sehun had told him that a lot of idols were jerks.  Sehun had told him to focus on work and not pay too much attention to other idols, even the nice ones.

            Why did he keep saying this?  Was he trying to warn Hwanhee about somebody in particular?  Was it just a general thing about the industry overall?  He didn’t mean anyone at his own company.  And he didn’t mean anybody in Hwanhee’s company, either.  He got along great with Teen Top.  “Do you not like Infinite?  But you’re friends with Nam Woohyun sunbaenim.”

            Sehun hesitated.  “This is just between us, okay?  Just the two of us.”

            He nodded, concerned.

            “Something happened, once.  Recently.  I saw a side of L hyung that I never saw before.  I don’t trust him, and I don’t think that you should get too close to him.”

            L sunbae?!  “But…”  But L sunbae was so nice!  “Changjo hyung…”  Did Sehun know something about L that Changjo didn’t know?  Maybe Sehun was mistaken?

            “I know they’re close.  I’m not saying that you have to tell Changjo to stay away from him.  I just want you to stay away from him, okay?”

            But L was a prince.  Not his prince, but a prince.  So handsome and cold on the surface.  So wonderful underneath.  Just thinking about L made him want to thrust his ass out and offer himself to be used.  To be used however L wanted to use him.  “Was he rude to you?”

            “There are sides to him that he keeps hidden.  Sides that I don’t think even people close to him know about.  You might not see them, but they’re there.  And I don’t want you to think he’s better than he is, and get hurt.”

            He nodded.  This was horrible.  “It’s okay,” he told himself.  “That’s okay.  I only need one prince, anyway.  He’s just a handsome prince from a neighboring kingdom, but he’s not my prince, so I won’t focus on him.  I only serve you.”  He’d liked having a back-up prince, though.  Not one he ever did anything with, just one he fantasized about.  Maybe he could try Nam Woohyun!  Sehun and Woohyun were close, there couldn’t be anything wrong with fantasizing about Prince Woohyun.  It was one of Sehun’s own hyungs!  He knew that the rumors about Woohyun weren’t true, but there were rumors, so.  He’d just pretend the rumors were true.

            “A handsome prince from a neighboring kingdom,” Sehun said, laughing.  “Are all of these princes undercover as idols?  How many hidden islands are there?  Are we all here on the same secret royal business, or different business?”

            “Oh, I can’t know about the secret royal business, that’s between all of you,” he said.  “Is your owner a prince, too?”  He grinned.  “No, that would make him a king!”

            Sehun glared at him.  “You do not get to call him that.  I’m your owner, that’s the only owner here.”

            “King Suho,” he said to himself.

            “He’s definitely not a king.”

            “But there’s a hierarchy.”

            “That’s a royal hierarchy, but I’m not here as royalty, I’m undercover,” Sehun said.  “He’s just the leader of my Korean identity.”

            “Okay, so he’s not a king.”  Hwanhee could go along with that.  “But he’s still your owner.”

            “He’s my leader!”

            “A leader is an owner.  That’s what you said!” he insisted, laughing, when Sehun tried to argue.

            “I was wrong.”

            “No, my prince is never wrong.”

            “I’m wrong all of the time.”

            There was a light tap at the door.  “Holy shit!” Hwanhee whispered, scrambling to his feet.  “How long were we in here?”  He jogged over to the door.  Jinhoo was out there.  “Sorry, hyung!” he said, opening the door.

            “Don’t want to interrupt,” Jinhoo said.  “The first van’s leaving now.”

            “Sorry,” he said again.  “Uh.”  He turned, looking from Sehun to Jinhoo, not sure what to do.  He couldn’t cut his time with his prince short, but he couldn’t keep his members waiting.

            “We’re finished,” Sehun said, getting up.  “Sorry, I kept him too long.  Before you go, could I see you for a minute?”

            “Yes, fine,” Jinhoo said.  He nudged Hwanhee out with a smile.  “You can go ahead and get in the van.”

            “I was going to stay.  I have to make up for the rest of practice.”

            “It’s okay.  I know you know the moves.  We got a lot done before Sehun sunbae showed up,” Jinhoo said.  “You can go over it in the morning if you still need to.”

            He wasn’t so sure.  From the hallway, he bowed at Sehun.  “Thank you for coming.”

            “Try twice a day,” Sehun reminded him.  “Like vitamins.”

            “Vitamins!”  It was the funniest thing he’d ever heard.  Sex, like vitamins?  Cocks, like capsules?  “I’ll try!” he promised.

            He saw Wooshin drifting down the hallway, heading for the stairs.  When he went into the practice room, Kogyeol was there with Wei, talking.  “Hey,” Wei said, spotting him.  “How’s your prince?”

            Handsome.  Sexy.  Powerful.  Wonderful.  Fantastic.  “I think he really likes me.  As a dongsaeng, I mean.”

            “He’d better,” Wei said.

            “Hey, uh.”  Kogyeol drifted towards him.  “Whatever I said earlier, I didn’t mean to be hard on you.  I shouldn’t have said it.  You can see Sehun sunbae whenever you want.”

            “No, but you were right.  I shouldn’t miss practice, it’s not fair.”

            “You were here for most of it,” Wei said.  “Everybody has to miss a few minutes here and there for something.”

            “Yeah, it’s fine,” Kogyeol said.  “Forget I said it, okay?”

            It was really nice of Kogyeol to apologize.  “Okay, thanks.”  He smiled, because he really was grateful to his hyung.  He just still thought that Kogyeol had been right in the first place.

            The three of them talked about what he’d missed, and they went over the hand placement together.  They were busy doing that when Jinhoo came in.  “You should all be down in the van, come on,” Jinhoo said, shooing them out.  “Grab snacks and drinks on the way out, if you want, we’re not going straight to the dorm.”

            “What?” Kogyeol asked.  “Where are we going?”

            “You, too,” Jinhoo said, gesturing to Hwanhee.

            “No, I’m going to stay-”

            “Lee Hwanhee!” Jinhoo exclaimed, exasperated.  “All right, you can stay here if you want.  But Sehun sunbae invited you over, so I was going to take you there on the way home.  So you can drop in for a few minutes.”

            “EXO’s dorm, now?” Kogyeol asked.

            Wei grinned.  “Do they need the servant to sweep the hearth?  Hang laundry?  Scrub floors?”

            “I want to scrub their floor,” he realized.  “Do you think I could mop their kitchen?  Would that be weird?  They probably have housekeepers, don’t they?”

            “You won’t know what he wants you for if you don’t go,” Jinhoo said, taking hold of his sleeve and tugging him out of the room.

            “The throne has sent for you!” Wei told him.

            “Stop teasing!”  He loved it.  “Did you look at those links I sent you?” he asked Jinhoo.  “The costumes?  Do you think I can get one?  I wouldn’t wear it in public!  Just at our dorm.  Or, or maybe at Sehun hyung’s dorm, if he wants it.”

            “Costumes?” Kogyeol asked.

            “Maid outfits,” Jinhoo explained.  “I’m still thinking about it.”

            “They’re only normal maid costumes,” Wei said.  “I thought you’d want, like, you know.  Not to make assumptions, but.  Sexy maid costumes.”

            Jinhoo hyung already doesn’t like it,” Hwanhee said.  “If I ask for sexy ones, he’ll really say no!”

            “But if they’re not sexy, what’s the point?” Kogyeol asked.

            “Okay, that’s enough talk about this,” Jinhoo said as they got to the bottom of the stairs.  “The whole neighborhood doesn’t need to hear about it.”

            “Are we really going to EXO’s dorm?” Hwanhee asked, getting in front of them and walking backwards.  “Right now?”

            “Yes, but just a short visit,” Jinhoo said.

            “Did King Suho say it’s okay?”

            “King what?” Kogyeol asked, laughing.

            “Oh, hey, he’s the king, isn’t he?” Wei asked.  “If Sehun sunbae’s the prince, then Suho sunbae’s the king.”

            “No, I think U-Know Yunho sunbaenim is the king,” Kogyeol said.  “Or Kangta sunbaenim.”

            “Yes, Suho sunbae said that it’s fine,” Jinhoo said.  “Of course I already asked him, to make sure, because a leader’s authority should be respected.”

            “Yes, hyung,” Kogyeol said, bowing to him.

            “We understand, hyung,” Wei added, bowing, laughing.

            “To the palace!” Hwanhee exclaimed, and burst outside.



            Sehun rushed into his dorm.  “Kai, Kai,” he called, kicking his shoes off.  He ran to their room.  It was empty.  “Kai!”

            “He’s not here, maknae,” Lay called from somewhere else in the dorm.

            “Is the rookie really coming over?” Chanyeol called from another room.

            “Yes!  His name’s Lee Hwanhee,” Sehun said.  “D.O. hyung!  Where-”

            “What?” D.O. called.

            Sehun found him in the kitchen.  Hwanhee’s coming over can I use our room could you please give me some privacy?” he asked in one breath.  He didn’t know how close behind him Up10tion’s van was or how much time he had.

            “Yeah, okay,” D.O. said.  “Just let me know when he’s gone, I want to go to bed.”

            “Great thank you I love you,” he said, jogging away.  “We are one!”

            “Let’s love!” Chen called.

            “Maknae, don’t shout all over the dorm,” Suho called.

            “Sorry!” he said automatically.  He ran into the bathroom to wash his junk, but halfway through unbuttoning decided against it.  Whatever was going on down there, he wanted his pet to savor it.  He went to his room and locked the door, then dug one of the dog bowls out from the box under his bed.

            The doorbell rang.

            His excitement spiked.  His pet was here.  He turned on music and hurried to the door.

            Lay was already there.  “Hi, come in.”

            “Are they - - hi, you came,” Suho said, coming around the corner.  “Oh, just two?  I thought you traveled in fives.”

            “They’re downstairs,” Jinhoo said.

            “Oh,” Suho said.  “Well, I - - I don’t want to make them wait in the van.  They can come up, if they want.”

            “I don’t want to intrude, it’s late, your members don’t want rookies underfoot,” Jinhoo said.

            “No, bring them up,” Suho said.  “Our Teen Top sunbaes have always been very good to us, and we should pass that along to our TOP Media hoobaes.”

            “There’s room,” Lay added.  “Is Kuhn here?”

            “It’s, uh, Kogeol hyung and Wei hyung and Wooshin hyung,” Hwanhee said.

            Great, now that everyone had sorted that out, could Sehun have his pet?  “We’ll be in my room,” he said, gesturing Hwanhee on.

            “I didn’t bring anything,” Hwanhee whispered.

            “All I want is you,” he said, and he pushed Hwanhee into his room.  “Badminton,” he added, locking the door.

            Moaning, Hwanhee went down on his knees.  His hands behind himself, his back arching, he turned on his knees, looking up at Sehun with bright, hungry eyes.  “I’m so grateful.”

            “Good,” Sehun said, unbuttoning.  “Suck my cock.”

            Ooohhh, mmmm, mmff.”  Moaning, Hwanhee latched onto it.  His hands behind his back, his hips working in hungry jerks, he mouthed Sehun’s cock.  His moans hummed around Sehun’s shaft, his throat vibrating as he bobbed his head.

            They weren’t supposed to take all night with this, but Sehun knew what he needed, and he knew what Hwanhee needed, too.  “Hands and knees,” he ordered, pushing Hwanhee off of his cock.

            Gasping, Hwanhee scrambled.  “Yes, hyungnim, thank you, hyungnim.”

            “You don’t drool enough on my cock,” Sehun snapped, grabbing the lube.  “From now on, I want it juicier.”

            “Yes, I will, I’m sorry, I’ll drool a lot from now on,” Hwanhee promised, arching his back.

            “Fuck,” Sehun grunted, stripping himself, staring at Hwanhee’s perky ass.  So invitingly raised, god, his pet wanted it.  “I’ve wanted to do this all day.”  Kneeling down, he yanked Hwanhee’s pants down roughly, baring that round little ass.  “Take your shirt off.  Wanted to give it to you since I saw you.  Wanted to drag you onstage so I could fuck you in front of the whole festival and everybody could get a good look at you twitching around on my cock.”

            “Yes, yes, please,” Hwanhee panted, squirming.  “Yes, please, use me in front of everybody.”

            “Filthy slut.”  He jammed a lubed finger in, and Hwanhee’s squeal made him glad he’d turned the music up so loud.  “Yeah, you like that?” he asked, lubing Hwanhee fast, stretching that hole nice and wide, spreading Hwanhee open.

            “I love it, thank you, thank you.  Thank you for using me, I’m so grateful.”

            “Good.  Don’t come.”  He shoved Hwanhee down, pinning Hwanhee under his weight as he thrust in.

            Ahh!  Oh, oh, okay, ooouhhh, yes, ohh-hh-ooo, ohh, hunh-hh-hh, oh, oh, yes!”  Hwanhee twisted under him, crying out.  He knew he was going too fast, and he wasn’t sorry.  He knew he was fucking too hard, he knew it, and that only made him want to thrust harder, harder, really ram it in there, pound Hwanhee’s vulnerable, trusting body.

            “Take it,” he ordered, fucking Hwanhee roughly, forcefully.  “Take my cock, you’ve been begging for it all day, you’ve been after me all night, you’ve been demanding my attention.  Now you fucking have it, so take it, take it.”

            “So good, it feels so good, oh, oh, thank you,” Hwanhee moaned, shuddering against him.  “Oh, god, okay, okay, oohhh, I’m grateful, thank you for using me, thank you for letting me feel you inside me.”

            Nothing he could do to his pet would break their bond, nothing would shatter Hwanhee’s faith in him.  No matter how brutal of an owner he was, his pet would always be loyal, always obey him, always adore him.  “I own you,” he panted, pulling out, “I own you,” and he came on Hwanhee’s tender, abused ass.

            “Yes, thank you, oh, god,” Hwanhee moaned, squirming ecstatically, hips rolling.  “You own me, I’m your vessel, you used me, you used me.”

            Swiping his fingers through the cum oozing over Hwanhee’s ass, he pushed them in.  “I can use you however I want.”

            Ahh-hh!  Ah, okay, yes, okay, mmm, thank you.”  Agitated, gasping, Hwanhee squirmed.  Sehun stretched his sore asshole, teasing and spreading him, fucking him with lube-slick, cum-slick fingers.  “Use me however you want, whenever you want, I’m yours, I’m yours, you can do anything to me.  More, please, please.”

            “Do you want to get off?” Sehun asked him, savoring his obscene writhing, his hungrily rolling hips, his shuddering body.

            “No,” he panted.  “No, you don’t want it, so I don’t want it.  I only want what you want, you’re all that matters.  My owner, you own me.  You own me,” he chanted.  “More, more, god, please, I can take it, I can take all of it.”

            “Up on all fours,” Sehun said, abruptly smacking his ass and getting up.

            “Yes, yes, thank you,” he said, pushing himself up.

            Sehun walked naked over to the corner, in front of the closet.  Beside the dog bowl.  “Hwan-ah,” he said, and snapped his fingers.  Here.

            Whimpering, Hwanhee crawled to him.  The red, plump head of Hwanhee’s erection was shiny with pre-cum.  At his feet, Hwanhee cowered, shrinking away from the bowl, whining pitifully and refusing to look at it.

            “Polish the inside with your cockhead,” Sehun ordered him.  “Then come in it.  You’re going to have to lick it up, so I want to see a lot of jizz.”

            “I must have been good, so good,” Hwanhee moaned.  “Oh, ooohhh, I must have served you so well, if you’re rewarding me like this.”  He crawled over the bowl.  Unnhh, oo-hh-hhh, it’s so humiliating, thank you, I’m so grateful to be allowed to humiliate myself in front of you.  I’m such a grateful pet, you’re so, oh, oh, so good to me.”  Groaning, he lowered his hips, and he rubbed his cock right against the bowl.  Mmmooooo, mmooooo, mmmo-ooo-oooo, oh.”  His eyes closed, his head up, he mooed ecstastically as he tenderly humped the bowl.  His long erection flopped and slid all over the bowl.  The fat head bumped around the inside, leaving a shiny trail.  Mmmooo, mmmooooo, mmooo-ooo-ooo!”  He sounded orgasmic, his hips picking up momentum.  He found a good angle and started humping more energetically, his balls bouncing against the outside of the bowl.  “Feels so good to humiliate myself in front of you, oh, thank you, I’m so grateful, I’m so grateful you’d let me do this.  I’m such a filthy slut, I’m so grateful.”

            “Good pet,” Sehun murmured, treasuring him.  He was so obedient, so dedicated, so needy, so obscene, so shameless in his enthusiastic hunt for humiliation, Sehun couldn’t have asked for anything else from him.  He was incredibly lewd, his toned, muscular body lowered over the bowl, his gorgeous cock rubbing eagerly against it, those relentless animal noises bellowing out of him.  He was young and beautiful and trusting, and he was contorting himself in this grotesque ritual for Sehun’s private pleasure.  “Good pet.”

            Gonna come,” he panted, taking himself in hand.  Gonna, oohhh, ohhh, mmmoooo, mmoo-ooo-ooo, mmooo!”  Bellowing urgently, he masturbated.

            “Can’t jizz?” Sehun asked, just to make him self-conscious, just to add to his suffering, just to enjoy making him struggle.

            “I can, I can, I will, please.”  He was begging himself, mooing, pumping that big cock, his muscles flexing as he strained.  “Please come, please come, ohh, moooo, mmoo-oo-oo-oo!”

            “Looks like it’s not going to happen,” Sehun said.

            “It is, I can do it, please, let me do it.  Fuck, come on, come on, just come,” he whispered desperately.

            “Maybe that big cock’s too much for you to handle,” Sehun suggested.  “Maybe you don’t really want to come, maybe you don’t really want to obey me.  Maybe you’re too ashamed to have to lick it up, and you’re trying to get out of it.”

            “No!  Please, I can do it, I want to lick it up, I’ll lick up anything for you, anything, I’ll do anything,” and then he was coming, erupting, pouring thick jets of cum into the bowl.  Mmmooo, mmo-oo-ooo-oo, mmmmmmooo!”

            “Not bad,” Sehun said.

            His mooing went from urgent and triumphant to soft and satisfied.  Mooing happily, he milked himself, the last of his cream spritzing the bowl.  “I did it, hyungnim, I came.”

            “So you can obey.”

            “Yes, yes, I’ll obey you.”  His ass up, he lowered his face right into the bowl.  Already moaning, he slurped around the bottom of the bowl.  His busy, hungry tongue swiped in all directions.  He thrust his ass higher and higher, snorting greedily.  The bowl was clean but that didn’t slow him down at all, he just kept going, licking all over, even chewing on it.

            Sehun wanted to do him again.  “Get on your back on my bed.”

            “The royal bed,” he whispered, raising his head, and then he was in motion.  As completely obsessed as he was with the bowl, it was gratifying to see how immediately he left it behind as he raced over to Sehun’s bed.  Apparently, no matter how satisfying a good bowl fuck was, Sehun was even better.

            They didn’t have time to play around, so Sehun didn’t.  He just climbed on top of his pet and thrust in.  God, it was good.  His pet was eager for him, responsive to him, crooning gratefully with every thrust.  He fucked his pet slow and deep, rocking in and out of his pet until his balls couldn’t take it anymore.

            He savored it, savored having his pet twice in one night, savored his pet’s selfless obedience, savored his pet’s hot, insatiable ass.  When he came, it was with rich satisfaction, and he felt utterly soothed.  His instinct to dominate, his need to control, his intense and merciless sexual urges, had all been sated.  “Good pet,” he whispered, licking his pet’s face.

            “You came in me,” Hwanhee breathed, turning his radiant face to one side so that Sehun could nibble on him better.  “Oh, you came inside me.  You let me keep your royal jizz.”

            “Perfect fuckhole,” Sehun whispered, mouthing his jaw.  When he angled his face for more, Sehun spat on him, once, twice, three times, until it was dripping over his cheeks.  His moans were like excited, grateful cooing, and when Sehun rubbed it in, smearing spit over his face, he undulated.  “You like it,” Sehun told him.

            “Yes, please, I love it.  I love everything you do to me.”

            “Okay, I’m going to stop soon,” Sehun said.  “We can do one more thing.  What do you want?”

            Hwanhee didn’t hesitate.  “I want whatever you want, please.”  He watched Sehun avidly for a response.

            “Good pet,” Sehun said, and kissed his cheek.  “Tell me what you want.”

            “Can you fuck me again?”

            “No.”  Even princes were human.  No matter how royal Hwanhee thought he was, he couldn’t get it up that fast.

            “Can you use your fingers?” he asked.  “Can you spit on me some more?  Can you slap me until it hurts?  Can you please let me wash your kitchen floor or clean your bathroom or do your laundry, I’d love to do your laundry, please?”

            Hwanhee was aroused again.  He was still asking to be fucked, to be hurt, to be allowed to serve.  Sehun’s needs were being met, but his weren’t.

            “Okay,” Sehun said.  He grabbed the lube and drizzled it over Hwanhee’s erection, not wanting that gorgeous thing to get chafed.  “Sit up.  Masturbate and thank me,” he ordered.

            Immediately obedient, unquestioning, Hwanhee said, “Thank you, hyungnim, thank you,” already sitting up.

            Kneeling in front of him, Sehun waited until he had a good rhythm going, and then slapped him across the face.  “Thank me!”

            “Thank you!  Thank you, hyungniaa-aah!”  He gasped as the next blow turned his head.  “Thank you, hyungnim!  I’m grateful, I’m so grateful, you’re always so good to me.  No prince has ever been as generous as you.  I’m so glaa-aa-ah!”  Another slap, another gasp.  “I’m so glad,” he continued bravely, “so glad to serve you, so grateful to be able to ahhh!”

            Sehun slapped him lightly, slapped him without warning and without rhythm, just hard enough to make him feel it, just often enough to keep him off-balance.  He took longer and longer to recover from each one, and he masturbated more excitedly.  He started asking for it, “More, please, more,” and, “Again, hyungnim, please,” as his fist pumped up and down over his swollen, lubed cock.  Right at the end, he started mooing, forgetting himself, letting go, shaking and bellowing.  Sehun slapped him hard, hard enough to turn his cheek red, and then again, harder, and he came, like Sehun had shocked the cum out of him.  He squirted quickly, crying out, moaning, “Yes, yes, thank you, thank you, thank you.”

            “Good pet,” Sehun said, pinching his pretty pink nipples, the left one, the right one, the right one again, harder.

            Moaning, he collapsed onto his back.  Flushed, he tweaked his own nipples, just like Sehun had.  Then he stroked his abs, smearing his cum on himself.  He was undulating, writhing slowly, like pleasure was still washing through him.  His low, moaning noises were so satisfied, it sounded like he was purring.  “Thank you.”  His voice was dreamy, his fingertips still painting circles in his cum.  “Thank you, hyungnim.  You rewarded me so well.”

            Now this was a satisfied pet.  “You served me well,” Sehun promised him, stretching out over him.

            “I’ll do anything you want,” he promised blissfully, gazing at Sehun with unguarded adoration.

            Sehun nuzzled his cheek.  “You’re a good pet.”

            He smiled at Sehun and made a tiny, adorable growling sound, like a puppy.  Then he laughed and rubbed his face against Sehun’s cheek.  “I’m a good pet,” he whispered, like it was a cherished secret.

            “And you came for me like a freaky, depraved slut,” Sehun assured him, stroking his chest.

            “Yes, yes, please.”  His eyes slipped shut, his body shifting slightly with Sehun’s touch, his back arching to invite more.  “Yes, it was for you, I’m such a freaky slut for you.”  He sighed with genuine pleasure.  “Thank you for letting me.  I’m so grateful.”

            Sehun kept caressing him for a little while longer.  He was so relaxed, so blissful, he was beautiful like this, sweet and purring.  Whenever Sehun kissed his face, he hummed with contentment, and when Sehun toyed with his nipples, he breathed, “So grateful, yes, please.”  He was a gift.

            Finally, Sehun licked his eyebrow and whispered, “Badminton.”

            He sighed and wrapped his arms around Sehun.

            Sehun shifted onto his side, his back to the wall.  Hwanhee snuggled in against his chest.

            So trusting.  It was infinitely rewarding to see him like this, to see him so satisfied and relaxed, so happy.  “Thank you,” Sehun said softly, stroking his back.  Such a pretty little pet with such a hot body.  “Thank you for everything you gave me tonight.”

            “You let me get off twice,” Hwanhee said.  “You screwed me twice.  I didn’t think we’d have time for so much.  I think you treat me too well.”  His eyes opened and his hand stole over Sehun’s side.  “I think I’m a really spoiled pet.”

            “You are,” Sehun agreed.

            Smiling, he reached a hand up.

            Sehun smacked Hwanhee’s hand away from his face.  “Not that spoiled.”

            “Why can’t I touch your face?” Hwanhee asked.  “We’re not even inside a scene!”

            “Do you grab all of your hyungs’ faces?”

            “Well, I don’t grab them.  I get to touch them, though!”

            “All of them?  Jinhoo’s face?  C.A.P. hyung’s face?”

            “I can’t just touch C.A.P. hyung wherever I want!”

            “Then you can’t touch me wherever you want, either.”

            “He’s your sunbae and your hyung,” Hwanhee pointed out.  “You’re only a little sunbae and a little hyung, compared to him.  I can touch your face.”  Mischief crept into his expression.  “I could probably even kiss you.”

            “Do you want to die?”

            He laughed, not threatened at all.  “I’ll try it later.  You’d like it!  I’m a good kisser.”  He hesitated.  “I think.”

            Sehun kissed his cheek, then nibbled on him lightly, tenderly, until he squirmed.

            “God, that feels amazing,” he breathed, holding onto Sehun’s shoulder.  Mmm.”

            “You don’t know if you’re a good kisser?” Sehun asked, sucking on his cheekbone.

            “I don’t know.  I can’t kiss myself and find out.  Wei hyung likes it, but Wei hyung loves kissing.  Bitto hyung likes it, but Bitto hyung likes kissing, too.  I think it probably means more if someone likes kissing me who doesn’t like kissing anybody all of the time.  But who doesn’t like kissing?”

            “So you’ve really never met Teen Top?” Sehun asked, pulling back to search his face.

            He burst into happy laughter.  “Why do you say all of these weird things about Teen Top?  Are you trying to start rumors about our sunbaes?”  He walked his fingers over Sehun’s chest.  “If I could kiss Chunji hyung, I’d do it all of the time.  Or Niel hyung!  Have you seen Niel hyung’s mouth!  I’d love to kiss him.”

            “Who do you want to kiss the most?”

            “You,” he said immediately, adorably, grinning at Sehun.  “All of the time, you.”

            “You’re a very good pet,” Sehun decided, cupping his ass.

            Mmm.”  He squirmed, kissing Sehun’s chest.  “Who do you like kissing?  I’ll bet you’re great at it.”

            “I’m pretty fantastic,” he agreed.  “Just between us, I really like kissing Chen hyung.”

            “Oh, Chen sunbae.”  Hwanhee rolled onto his back, making a dazed sound.  “Chen sunbae is my new goal.  My life’s goal.  I have to learn to kiss like Chen sunbae.  Better!  Better than Chen sunbae.”  He rolled right off of the bed, getting to his feet.

            Sehun hadn’t been finished touching him, yet.  C’mere.”

            Hwanhee leaned back over the bed, kissed him on the shoulder, and moved away again.  “I have to go look at Chen sunbae’s mouth.  Do you have photos?  I’ll find some on-line.  And I have to practice kissing.  You might want to kiss me someday, and I have to be ready.”

            Abandoned with a simple peck, Sehun felt kind of patronized.  Amused by his pet’s blithe dismissal, he got up.  “Have you been practicing rimming?”

            “Of course.”  Sehun had only been teasing, but he said it like Sehun should’ve already known.  “Some of the members like it more, so I’ve tried it on them.  I wouldn’t have guessed Chen sunbae!  I might’ve guessed Xiumin hyung, he has such a pretty mouth, he’s so sexy.”

            “You think Xiumin hyung’s sexy?”

            “Doesn’t everybody?”  Hwanhee wiped himself off and got dressed.  He moved around Sehun’s room easily, at home here.  He was really comfortable in his own skin for someone who’d just been forcibly fucked and degraded.  Then again, he was comfortable in his own skin because he’d been forcibly fucked and degraded.  He’d come to Sehun looking for something, he’d gotten it, and now his world was set right again.

            It was a really special thing to trust Sehun with.  A really precious, intimate part of himself to share with Sehun, to let Sehun be the one to give this to him.

            He ran his hands through his hair, fluffing and smoothing, trying to fix it.  “Thank you for.”  He blushed, his hand falling still.  “For the bowl.  The thing with the bowl.  And everything else!”

            “Are you all right?” Sehun asked, cupping his face gently.  “Did I hit you too hard?  I don’t want to go too far with something I can’t take back.”

            “I wish you’d slap me harder,” he admitted.  Lifting his hand from his hair, he curled his arm around Sehun’s shoulders.  “It feels so good.  I got off on it.  I literally got off on it,” he repeated, and Sehun knew that he was saying it to himself, listening to how it sounded.  He processed a lot of his sexuality out loud, confronting it, absorbing it.  “It was incredible, though.  You wouldn’t be consistent, so I never knew when the next one was coming, I kept wanting more and more, I got so much more turned on every time you slapped me.”

            “I have to be careful,” Sehun said, caressing his cheek.  “It’s okay if you like some pain, but I can only hurt you so much.  I don’t want to do anything to injure you.  So sometimes you might want more than I can give you, because we have to be safe.”

            “No, I don’t want you to, like, cut me or punch me out, or anything,” he said.  “It just, it feels really good when it hurts.”  Blushing, he groaned, burying his face against Sehun’s chest.  “God, that’s not okay, I shouldn’t say things like that.”

            “It is okay,” Sehun said, cupping the back of his head.  “It’s fine.  You can say anything to me, you can tell me whatever you want.  I’m glad you can confide in me, I want to know everything about your sexuality that I can, so I can make it good for you.”

            “I got a hard-on when you scratched me,” Hwanhee said against his chest.  “In the dressing room.”

            “I did, too.”

            “Yeah, I know.”  Hwanhee gazed up at him, hesitant, hopeful.  “Can I touch your cock?”

            “Right now?”

            He nodded.  “I never get to touch it when we’re not - - badminton!” he said suddenly.

            “No,” Sehun said.  “It doesn’t count when you say it.”

            “It might, sometime!”

            “Maybe.”  Stepping back, he undid his pants again.  “I fucked myself raw in your hot, slutty hole, so be gentle.”

            “God, you’re so good-looking,” Hwanhee said, staring at his crotch.  The worshipful way his pet gazed at him did wonders for his ego.  “Do you know a lot of sluts?”

            “Not judgmental, just, guys who are constantly hot for sex?  I know a ton.”

            Mmm.”  Lightly, Hwanhee fondled him.  His pet’s tender caresses were so adoring, so devoted, he felt a rich pleasure that went past mere sex.  “It’s so soft.  How can I be sluttier for you?”

            “I don’t know.  I say this with total admiration and respect, but, you’re really fucking slutty, Hwanhee-ah.”

            He laughed, blushing.  “You have really nice balls.”

            “I know.”

            “Do your members, your other sex partners, whoever you do stuff with.  Do they take good care of you?”  With obvious reluctance, Hwanhee let go.  His expression was worried.  “Do you get everything you want whenever you want it?  Is there someone around who can suck your balls and rim you and everything else when I’m not here?”

            “I get plenty of sex.  Trust me,” he said, smiling, zipping up, “I get plenty of sex.”  Hwanhee visibly relaxed.  “There’s a certain kind of sex I only get from you, and I get pretty hard to deal with when I don’t have enough of that.  But I can get off with plenty of guys, don’t worry about that.”

            “But you need me,” Hwanhee said.  “Can I come over more often?  I won’t bother your members, I won’t stay for long.  You don’t even have to get me off, don’t worry about that.  You can just call me over and fuck me on the floor, and I’ll go.”

            “I do like fucking you on the floor,” Sehun admitted, running his hand over Hwanhee’s arm.  Hwanhee moved closer, and Sehun rested a hand on his ass.  “But there’s more to it than that.  I like getting you off.  I like touching you and talking to you.  I like watching you fold my socks.  I like hearing you beg.  There’s a lot more to what I need from you than just fucking you on the floor.  Although, yeah, making you squeal while you writhe around under me definitely gets me off.”

            “I can come over and fold your socks,” Hwanhee said.  “I can come over and beg you, I love begging you.  Whatever you want.”

            “You want to see me more often.”

            He hesitated, looking conflicted.  “What I want isn’t important,” he finally said, running his hands over Sehun’s sides.  “What you want is all that matters.  If you want me to be here, then I want to be here.”

            Suho was being way more lenient these days.  Sehun might be able to take advantage of that.  If he pushed to see Hwanhee more frequently now, in the beginning of their relationship, the rest of the members would get used to it, and he could establish a pattern of more visits.  “I do want to see you more.  I’ll see if I can.  But don’t worry about me the rest of the time.  I get as much sex as I want.  And if I want anything else, I have a pretty little cumslut who calls me every morning and offers to do anything for me.”

            “Anything,” Hwanhee murmured, smiling at him, face tilting up to his.  “Anything you want, anything.”

            Sehun kissed his cheek, smiling back at him.  “Thank you, Hwanhee-ah.”



Series page: "Let's Love"



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Copyright May 2017
by Matthew Haldeman-Time